Journey to the West: Funeral Mission to the West

"Great Sage, why did you follow that thief Bald to rob Lingshan?"
"Hey, it's hard to say. Back then, that bald thief pinched my neck and asked me, are you going to the West with me, or will I send you to the West..."
"Marshal Tianpeng, how about you?"
"He said that he was afraid of starving on the westbound road, so he brought some dry food with him."
"..."
This is a joyous, dark-hearted, and amusing story.