[Tutorial] Self-indulgence

It was once the strongest fort I thought.

Yet he was still no match for time and fate.

With his back to me, he was tinkering with various ingredients in the kitchen. There was no sound around him, but I felt that he was humming a cheerful song.

That's what I've seen countless times.

ah, speaking of...

"...Obviously they rarely come." I looked at that figure almost greedily, twiddling my fingers with my hands behind my back.

My father seldom cooks. Although he is good at cooking, he is always too lazy to do it. ...But as long as I say I want to eat, this person will be very quick to work in the kitchen.

It's too troublesome for me to say that I don't want to cook every time.

"I," the moment I really spoke to that figure, all the memories suddenly rushed up, I couldn't help shaking my head, and the figure also paused because of my voice, turned sideways and seemed to be waiting for me After that.

"Don't cook for now...I..." I know this is a dream, just a world formed by my regrets.But I don't know what to say to him, even if it's just an unreal thing created by my dream. "Anyway, don't mess around..." I said this very weakly, but the shadow in the kitchen quickly put down what he was doing and walked towards me.

There are less than five steps in total, but I really realize how many things are separated by this distance.

When he stood in front of me and his face was already blurred, I needed all my strength to hold back the grievance. "..." I wanted to say that word, but I couldn't.So she just threw herself on him and tightly strangled his waist with both hands.

"I'm super useless, right?" I told myself that I could only hug for three seconds, so after counting to three in my heart, I looked up at him and said with a smile.

His face is not as clear as it is now.

I still remember him all the time, even if I leave this dream, I will forget him.

"By the way, teach me how to do something!" I grabbed his arm as I did when I was a child, shaking his hand unrelentingly. "Teach me how to drink. You see, I'm an adult, let's have a drink together?" A dining table and his favorite wine appeared in front of us. I pulled the stool aside and sat down, then opened the bottle and poured the two wine glasses Full.

He didn't speak, and he didn't object, he just sat on the seat on my left hand side.

"Speaking of when I was young... I used to be scolded by you for being playful." I hugged the wine glass and looked at the splashing water on the surface of the wine, "But no one dared to scold me except you. After all, I was very stubborn when I was young. of."

When I was young, I was told by many people that my temper was different from that of ordinary girls. They all said that I had a weird personality and only he smiled and didn't care and still treated me as usual.

Ahh, thinking about it this way, I remembered that I was often beaten and scolded by my mother because of my personality.

"In elementary school, you were very strict. Every time you didn't finish your homework or made a mistake, you would be dragged out of bed and beaten." I couldn't help laughing when I thought of that experience.

But when I think about things in junior high school, I can't laugh. "When I first entered junior high school, I was always mistaken for a boyfriend and girlfriend when I was with you. Puff, I look so old." This is one of the few memories he and I have. Not long after that, he leave.

Calculated in this way, the memories of me and him are only a little over ten years in the end.

"High school... oops, I used to get along with my old lady, but after you left, I suddenly felt that if I lost anything, I would have nothing." I refilled a glass of wine for him while I was talking, I don't know if it was wine Too astringent or other reasons, I feel my hands are cold and trembling.

After filling his glass, I drank mine down in one gulp. "After that, my mother and I got along very well, aha, if that kind of thing hadn't happened..." I smiled slightly, "...if I leave here, these memories, and you... can't come back, right? .”

From the very beginning, he just listened blindly, occasionally smiling, and most of the time he just looked at me and talked.

In fact, he is not very good, sometimes even bad.

But I can't bear it. I like him very much, and I can't bear his kindness to me.He's more of a friend to me than his father figure.

"I..." In the end, I couldn't say anything anymore, I could only cry blindly.

Without any image, snot and tears flowed out like this, looking very ugly.I don't want other people to see me like this, especially the person waiting for me in the distance, so I can only lower my head, finally stopped the tears, wiped my face with my sleeve, and he reached out and patted The movement of my shoulders made me cry again unprepared.

That's my favorite move he did to me.

He always talked to me like a friend and a father, and then put his hand around my shoulder and patted my shoulder.

He always reminded me to walk with my back straight, so my originally competitive character became more unwilling to admit defeat and more stubborn unintentionally.

"...Look at how ugly I am crying..." I don't know how long it took me to finally stop crying, but my eye sockets still hurt so much that I wanted to cry. "Actually, I've always thought that it would be great if I could change the past." I took a deep breath, spread my palms and looked at the lines on my hands. "And then here, I was taken aback when I found out I had this ability."

I remember that when I knew that ability, I felt an inexplicable emotion called regret.

I don't know what regret it was for, but I just vaguely felt that I must have wanted to change something.At first I thought it was something that happened that I regretted, or maybe it was just a desire to live.

But Gangji has been with me.

There's good and bad in this, but I really do... like him.

So I, who have no memory of the past, have only one definition of that ability, and that is to sweep away obstacles more or less for the clumsy Tsunayoshi.

Even if you ask me to say this now, even if I am very shy, I still think so.

But now I finally understand where the strong emotions came from.

Just want to see this person.

The past is difficult to change, so it makes people feel more regretful that they didn't pay attention to it at the time.

"Tell you, I...?" I tried to pull out the blade in my arms in the most relaxed tone, but he was suddenly pulled up from the chair, and then he suddenly trampled on the top of my head with his hands .

I looked at him suspiciously, but he grabbed my shoulders with both hands and turned my whole body to face him.

"What, what's the matter?" I was a little uneasy, but he didn't answer me, and he couldn't answer me.Then, I felt a sudden force from the person behind me.

I was pushed off guard, and I staggered a few steps forward, but instead of falling to the ground, I was caught in someone's arms. "Zero, are you okay?!"

"Eh?" I made a sound in a daze, as if I understood something, but I couldn't remember anything.

I felt as if someone patted my shoulder lightly, and then it lightened, but tears also fell out. "Tsuna-kichi...I feel so bad."

"...I know." He hugged me a little bit at a loss, after a little hesitation, he chose to hug me with both hands, patted my back, and let me bury my head on his shoulder.

I always know that some things can't go back, and some people can't get back.However, compared to the lost memories...

"Are you still here?" At this moment, I don't know who I am asking, or just want to ask this question.

He tightened his arms bit by bit, and the strength of holding me was gradually increasing, but I suddenly felt like my heart was filled with something.The huge hole that was shattered because of something before was filled by Tsuna in such a strange way. I seem to know what happened, but I don’t seem to know.

"Trust me... Please believe me..." He hugged me, his voice sounded firm and clear like never before. "I like you."

I suddenly felt suffocated.

The words I heard while walking in that darkness suddenly came out at this moment.

"I... I don't know." After making such an answer, I could only cry on his shoulder at a loss, while the two people standing in the distance chose to turn around and face me when they saw me.

"Zero,... believe... hiss," he paused because of the pain from my biting his shoulder, but even so, after slowly relaxing his tense body, he continued. "I like you, there is no doubt that I like you very much." He said, gently brushing my hair. "This is not a reason for you to believe me,...I, I just want to tell Zero."

I suddenly let go, looking at the place where I had been bitten and bleeding, a little annoyed. "Why did you say it..."

If I don't say it, then I can pretend that I don't know and continue to make me owe you.

"Why... I'm so sad." I grabbed my chest in a daze, and gently pushed him away, "It feels like I had a long dream... It's really long."

He looked at me and suddenly rubbed my face with the back of his hand. "Well, I've been waiting for you to wake up for a long time."

He said, hugging me again. "Thank you for waking up."

"...Ah, yes. I woke up." I was a little confused for a moment, but I still followed my own thoughts and leaned on his shoulder. "But, do you really like me?"

I know it's strange to say this at this time, but I said it, which made him shudder.

"It's really not like before...?" I looked at him, looked at his pale and pitiful face, just looked at him like this, just like when I didn't have a body before, I only looked at this person .

"I..." He seemed to realize something and showed a surprised expression, but I didn't want to hear what he said afterwards, so I went over and blocked his mouth with my mouth, and blocked his words.

He seemed to become more proficient than before, and slowly began to dominate the rhythm between them.

I didn't close my eyes during this kiss, and neither did he.

Then I saw clearly what he saw.

— those beautiful brown eyes, and only me.

"Gangji, I think I'm crazy." When I was held in his arms again, I said softly, in a voice that was almost blown away by the wind.

Then, I close my eyes, not to see what kind of color will be in those eyes.

Surprised or something else, I don't want to guess, but... it won't be the same color as mine.

The author has something to say: _(:3」∠)_ After being pushed by his father to his boyfriend, Zero forgot the things in the dream and his past, so the memory at this moment is connected to walking in the dark and hearing Tsuna said frankly that he didn't like Zero at the time, but liked the feeling of Zero by his side...

After finishing the chapter tomorrow, there will be an extra episode of the happy dating chapter, so I will update it once a week [Hello]

_(:3」∠)_Why do I feel like I don’t want to end it... Obviously the income is not particularly good? 【You respect yourself

But I think, what makes me feel this way must be you who have always supported me.