Suicide

Opening the envelope, Zhan Zhiling's photo came into view, and he opened the back of the photo with his hands. On it was written "Zhan Zhiling is a gift to Fengrou friends, and may the friendship last forever!" There are also three pages covered in dense italics Word stationery.The original text is now excerpted as follows.

Poor Jade:

How are you?When you open this letter, we will never see each other again. You don't have to feel guilty for your leaving, and you don't have to blame yourself for not being able to see me for the last time. For me, being able I have been very satisfied taking care of you for the past 13 years, but I was not able to accompany you to the end, and I felt ashamed to meet "Xiaobai".

By the way, you still don't know who "Xiaobai" is!Xiaobai is your mother, maybe you have some doubts, isn't her surname Zhan?Why is it called Xiaobai?These are all masterpieces of your Aunt Xu, maybe you still don't know much about your Aunt Xu, or even a stranger.She is a pistachio. Your mother can only smile when she is with her, and she smiles from the bottom of her heart.When they met for the first time, she saw that your mother was as white as ice and snow, so she jokingly said: You are so white, why don't you call you Xiaobai?Your mother smiled and did not answer.Later, when everyone's friendship gradually deepened, they all called your mother "Xiaobai" when they saw your mother, and your mother didn't refuse, and she answered very loudly.

Now you know the meaning of why I took my surname as Bai.I can't bear your mother. She left this world at the age of 35, and she left alone. If it wasn't for the fulfillment of her trust in her lifetime, when I heard you tell the news of her suicide 13 years ago, I didn't intend to continue to live. .However, when I saw you, your rebellious face, especially those venomous eyes, made me very sad.You are just a child, how much suffering does it take to wipe you down so ruthlessly.I can't just care about my own selfish desires and leave Xiaobai's flesh and blood alone in this world.

Xiaobai is like a considerate angel, but you are indifferent by nature and not good at speaking. These reasons make me doubt whether you are Xiaobai's own flesh and blood, but just remind me of your childhood in such a complicated environment I spent a lot of time, and I felt sad for my incompetence. If I could find you mother and daughter earlier, maybe your mother would be able to grow up with you, or maybe there was no such bad idea back then, so Xiaobai would Will not commit suicide, but that may not come without you.You may think that you should not have come into this world at all, but life is so impermanent, who can control life and death?Now that I have come to this world, my goal is to live hard.

I don't know if I should persuade you to let go of your hatred for my brother. He is your father, but he hurt you deeply. Regardless of the harm he caused to your mother, he is not qualified to discuss the role of father alone. Yes, not only was he unqualified, but he also took his anger out on you because of the grievances of the previous generation.For you, he didn't pay any attention to you. As a father, he really doesn't deserve your forgiveness.

But my brother is very sincere in his feelings for your mother. In order to protect your mother from being harassed by hooligans, he was willing to take a two-kilometer detour after school just to protect your mother from returning home safely, and you Mom didn't know; he was originally thin and not suitable for long-term exercise, but in order to build strong muscles, he ran to lift dumbbells every day, just because your mother joked that he was as thin as a bamboo pole .He also did many hilarious things for your mother, but unfortunately, like me, he did not win your mother's love. For this reason, he was almost depressed.My elder brother has been above the top since he was a child, and he only loved your mother. Even if he imprisoned you mother and daughter in a disguised form, he did not dissolve the marriage relationship with your mother, nor did he go out to find flowers and willows to relieve his loneliness.

What he can't let go of for a long time is that the scam of more than 20 years, in his opinion, that scam is a big failure and shame in his life.

Back then, your mother and your aunt Xu loved each other to death, but they were unable to go far away because of the crazy obstruction of their family members.Later, your grandparents backed down and allowed your mother and Xu to go far away, but your mother had to give birth to a son and a half to let them enjoy family happiness.Your mother agreed, but there was no suitable candidate for marriage.

I thought of my brother, he loves Zhan Zhiling so much, even if he finds out that he was cheated in the end, out of love, he will forgive Xiaobai, right?Will treat you well, right?So I told Xiaobai this idea, and she said excitedly after hearing this: Even if your brother doesn't want this child, you will still help me take care of her, right?

I nodded, she was in a hurry and didn't know what to say, her face was full of happiness.

In this way, you Aunt Xu, your mother and I, three people directed a good show.

And my elder brother is a logical victim, and he is also the happiest victim.When we got married, my eldest brother held a wedding banquet in almost the entire Zhifan City, wishing to tell everyone that his marriage partner was Zhan Zhiling.

At this time, our hearts are already a little uneasy.My elder brother's love for Xiaobai is obviously no less than any of us, and it is almost crazy.Just when we began to doubt whether the original decision was right or wrong, Xiaobai became pregnant. My elder brother immediately transferred all the property under his name to Xiaobai, and announced that he would quit the business circle forever, and was ready to put his body and mind on his family For this reason, he withstood the discussions and pressure from all sides.I also advised him not to be so reckless, but he said: I have only loved one person in my life, and apart from her, other things are like nothing to me.One sentence left me speechless.

Later, when you were born, your mother didn't leave. She felt my brother's kindness and couldn't bear to leave without saying goodbye, so she decided to seek your father's understanding and forgiveness before making the plan to leave.She told Xu Rouying and me about this idea, but neither of us agreed, the reason being that the deceit had already occurred, and a showdown now would not only fail to resolve the damage, but would worsen the situation. If your heart is deceived, even if there is no chance of turning back, you will never regret it.Then I went away without looking back, and then it became the last farewell.

I've searched every possible place, but I just didn't expect you to be in a madhouse.I didn't know what to do, so I went to question my brother, but he had already taken off his warm coat and became ruthless.So far, our affairs have been completely revealed, and I suddenly felt ashamed to face others, so I left home.And Xu Rouying and I have no intersection.

This matter, counting it is more than 20 years old, but I take it to my heart every day, and I dare not forget it. Even if I met you Xiaoyu later, it didn't ease in the slightest. On the contrary, it accumulated over time and became a piece of my heart. The huge boulder keeps me awake at night.In the end, I really couldn't bear this much. I decided to die, but I couldn't worry about you, so I wanted to ask my father to take care of you for me, but my father died. In desperation, I had to beg my mother to fulfill my last wish. You already know what happened later No more details.

Xiaoyu, you have grown up, and your human heart is far more sinister than you imagined. Even if you can't get the protection of your grandma, you still have to cheer up and face the harm.As for my brother, you can choose not to forgive him, and no one will blame you.

My dear little girl, from now on, no one can be your fetters, the sky is high and the sea is wide, go play freely!No one will stop you, control you, or possess you, so just bravely pursue what you want!

白姨

autograph

My tears soaked the paper, but I didn't realize it.

The author has something to say:

Work hard, don't be lazy