[The Big Bang Theory] Cohabitation strategy

I wake up not angry, really.But if you stayed up late last night to sketch until twelve o'clock, and you got a series of fatal calls at five o'clock in the morning-I'm fucking going to beat this person to death! !Nobody stop me! !In a state of rage, I grabbed my phone and yelled in a half-dream, "Who?! Better explain why you're calling at this hour!!! Otherwise I..." My remaining sanity prevents me from saying it" I'll find a gun to kill you" and lay on the bed panting manically.

After a few seconds of silence, the editor-in-chief Alyssa's calm and frightened voice came, "I, Alyssa Smith, your editor-in-chief."

I lost my temper all of a sudden.One of the great things about this editor-in-chief is that she can make her own mistakes look like other people's mistakes, and her brainwashing ability is comparable to MLM organizations.Facing such a wonderful editor-in-chief, it was difficult for me to wake up again, so I yawned and said, "Alyssa, as far as I know, our departure time is eight o'clock in the morning. So..." So you fucking What are you calling at five o'clock?Want to talk to me about life in your spare time? !

Alyssa said seriously: "Just now I suddenly thought of a good idea. When we go outing, we should bring our respective boyfriends or girlfriends to have a harmonious and loving group outing."

I look like I've been struck by lightning.Alyssa is in her 40s, and it is not easy to still maintain a pure heart that "it's great to see single dogs being abused".Just when I regained my mood, Alyssa said with the typical gossip spirit of middle-aged women: "Kado, let me guess, you...don't have a boyfriend yet?"

I shattered her fantasy with a blank face, "I have a boyfriend."

Alyssa said: "Well, I'm not surprised. See you at eight o'clock, remember to bring your handsome and tall boyfriend~"

handsome?I think Sheldon is quite handsome - the chiseled features of foreigners are really enviable.tall?It's really tall... At 1.6 meters three, I can reach his shoulders, and he is 1.8 meters eight.But why the combination of these two words, handsome and tall, has nothing to do with Sheldon at all... Poor Sheldon, who obviously doesn't look like a mantis in appearance and height, can only be called this title because of his indecent mouth... …pray for him.

But it's not his two points that I love.Now I have to think: How am I supposed to tell Sheldon that I'm taking him on an outing =_= Would it be too inhuman to call now?But on second thought, if I waited until six o'clock to tell him, he would probably cry because he didn't have time to prepare the "Sheldon Approved Lunch" ˊ_

So call now.

I found "Devil King Shelly" from the address book—ahem, this was set a long time ago, and I haven't thought of changing it yet.

"I'm Sheldon Leecooper. Hey, Caddo, what's worth calling me at five o'clock in the morning? Oh, let me guess!! Is it the Nobel Committee calling your house to inform me that I have won the Nobel Prize?" The Bell Prize in Physics? Gosh, tell me yes!" Sheldon's voice became more and more excited, and I could imagine him sitting up suddenly from the bed.But please, I didn't say a word! !

"Oh, you're going to be disappointed, Shelly. Our company is organizing an outing today, and we need to bring our boyfriend... we'll meet at eight o'clock in the morning. So, are you free, Shelly?" I asked.There was a very clear "oh~" sound of disappointment.Alas, hearing this, what is the illusion that he is sorry for vetoing him...

Then, Shelton said in a very honest tone: "There is a clear stipulation in the love contract that when both parties need to bring their partners to attend an event, both parties in love have the responsibility to accompany each other to participate. So, although I don't want to participate in this kind of life-wasting and time-wasting activity Well, what else can I do?"

Suddenly feel that the love contract is so beautiful!Sure enough, everything has two sides.

"It is said that there is a kite flying competition."

"Yeah, that's great!!!"

"Also, the unified lunch prepared at noon is barbecue..."

Then Sheldon's terrified voice managed to reach me, Leonard, Penny, and a lady downstairs through the walls.However, because Sheldon and I immediately sneaked to the supermarket to buy ingredients for a healthy lunch, 3A's wife vented her anger on Leonard and Penny... We learned the news when we came back, and we looked at each other tacitly .Sheldon held out his hand, and we clapped silently.

Penny and Leonard glared at us resentfully.

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Sheldon put on his energetic sportswear and tried to do some stretching exercises, but he fell down on the sofa in a moving posture without any suspense.Petunia looked down at him with her arms akimbo, and I could imagine her inner activities, which must be mixed with pity, sorrow, anger and helplessness... Then, in Sheldon's wailing, we all went to check what he called " A twisted lumbar spine", and finally found out that he was completely cranky...

I think, if I have no money in the future, I can still write a book, the name is "Snow White Sheldon and His Seven Dwarf Servants (Leonard, Howard, Raj, Petunia, Bernadette, Amy and Cardo).It would be even better if Sheldon won the Nobel Prize, and this book could be classified as biographical literature. ==

I also changed into sportswear and carried a hiking bag.I ride to the rendezvous in Leonard's car with Sheldon, and it's kind of like taking a grown daughter to a social dance...

Editor-in-chief Alyssa Smith, 43, looks exuberant in a lemon tracksuit.She saw us, waved her hands lively, and called out, "Hey, young Cardo and her beau!"

I introduced Sheldon to her, "This is Sheldon and Leonard. Well, Sheldon is my boyfriend. Leonard, Sheldon, this is Alyssa." Mrs. Smith would not let people call her "Mrs. Smith", young or old, Always call her Alyssa.I admire her a lot.

"You can call me Dr. Cooper. Just because I love comics doesn't mean I'm happy to hang out with a bunch of comic book nobodies."

"Sheldon!!" Leonard, who had become a habit, yelled with his hands on his forehead.

"I'm sorry, Alyssa, I shouldn't have spoken the truth sincerely."

What kind of apology is this... Although Sheldon's eyes have already shown that he has already given face by saying "I'm sorry".

Alyssa's eyes lingered on me and Sheldon for a while, then quietly pulled me over, and asked, "Your boyfriend... is he... on drugs?"

Me: "...No, he is not good at interpersonal communication." Hahaha!I'm so happy... Sheldon is considered to be on|drugs!

Sheldon, five meters away, took the luggage with his back to us, "I heard you~"

Alyssa glanced at me again, turned around silently, and said to the others: "Everyone, get ready, we're leaving soon."

"Wait," Sheldon turned sharply, "aren't we here for an outing?"

Alyssa: "...uh, I'sorry?"

colleagues:"……"

Me: "Sheldon, of course not. This is the rendezvous point!!"

"Is this bus behind us a means of transportation, not a gimmick set up by the comic company to attract attention? I can't take the bus, you know, Cardo."

?I said helplessly: "Okay, Sheldon, you go back."

"NO, NO~ I didn't mean that." Shelton turned his head and said, "Leonard, give me a ride."

?Leonard: "..."

?Me: "...I'll take the bus with them. Leonard, if you have time, come and play with us." It's so hard Leonard Butler!

?——————————

?On the bus, everyone speculated about the reason why Dr. Cooper and I were together.Some say it's because he's super rich == Some say he's Bradley Cooper's younger brother (what!), others say it's because he's smart (only me and that guy insist).

?When I arrived in the suburbs, the large expanses of green space made me feel very happy.By the way, I also saw Sheldon's real social ability.He just stalked me and said, "I made a sacrifice. Leonard said I need to be nice to your friends for you - well, I can't believe the guy who made a fool of himself at a Penny party is preaching to me - —I think he has a point, so..."

?I feel a chill.Sheldon, can we just shut up and eat?

?Alyssa gathered us and was talking about the purpose of this trip - to enhance the relationship and enhance the sense of teamwork.Sheldon began to shake his head and said, "I'm sure you've read Koozers' Inspirational, and it says exactly what you're doing." The core of leadership is caring and motivating people. Communication and interaction with the heart', you must understand."

? Alyssa looked at him inexplicably.

? I asked, "Uh, is that what you mean by 'friendly'?"

? "I'm actually showing kindness by acknowledging what she said. It's a neat way to do it. Don't compliment me."

?Children come back early from school, busy taking advantage of the east wind to release paper kites.

?The kite race started.I'm not very good at flying kites, so I gave Leonard my own.The two whispered and made a plan.I think it's getting worse and worse—these two have been flying kites together for so many years, will there be any problems...

? Sure enough, my hunch came true.Kites fell one after another in the hands of the Great Demon King Sheldon and Leonard, the people who restrained the Demon King.They were tragically severed from the thread and fell dangling down.

? Sheldon said with a victorious attitude: "Friendly means playing games with them with all your strength. I did it!!"

?Colleague A is a book fan. He said: "In "The Kite Runner", Hassan was chased by..."

?We watched Sheldon chasing the kite...Hey, don't think about it!What pictures are in your mind! !

?It was almost lunch time, and several people took out the grill from the bus and prepared to grill.Shelton held the thermos box and said calmly: "Barbecuing is the most primitive cooking method known to humans. It has become a popular activity now. I really don't know if this is the degeneration of human beings (in fact Sheldon is really giving me face by saying that). But~ Yes, you need to know that smoked food contains organic amines, and cooking will produce polycyclic hydrocarbons, benzopyrene and amino acid derivatives. Excessive drinking can make blood lead levels Increased height, combined with the above substances, may induce digestive tract diseases and even tumors. God, you bought so much beer...I pray for you."

?Several people who are grilling are dumbfounded.Leonard and I pulled Sheldon away speechlessly.

Sheldon was puzzled, and said, "I'm trying to develop relationships with them!"

?I finally understand what is meant by "God closes a door for you and opens a window for you at the same time".Sheldon is fine with that.He will never be able to become a well-rounded person.That's great!

? "Very good", compared to before.I've come to accept Sheldon now, and even find him very cute.He is much friendlier than before.

?I said, "Close your eyes, Sheldon."

"What are you doing? Oh! You're going to give me a present, right? I hope it's Superman's new figure!" Sheldon repeated "new figure" in a low voice, obediently closing his eyes.

?I stand on tiptoe, nest, why is he so tall, so tired...

?My heart was beating very, very fast. I don't know if Sheldon heard it.I kissed Sheldon, and the soft touch made my face burn.

? Then Sheldon's eyes snapped open!He stared at me blankly like a startled rabbit.I felt very embarrassed, so I pretended to say: "I was accidentally bumped by someone just now, and it hit your mouth..."

? "... Hmm~ This reason is acceptable."

"Accept...Accept!!" I rushed at him viciously, and he started to run after being startled. He ran really fast! ! "Come back, I promise I won't beat you to death!!"

"Not even a first-degree disability!" Sheldon retorted.

?Playing a game of scratch on the lawn is tiring.But since I'm grabbing cute Sheldon shoes, I'm still motivated!Sheldon ran and ran, I chased and chased.It seems that I still underestimated a person who grew up being chased...

?I was behind him, so the roots of his ears were red, and I noticed it right away.

?…Lovely Sheldon.Why are you so cute!

?I said out of breath: "Okay, I won't chase! Stop!"

? Shelton stared at me warily and stopped.I approached him with a smile, and slowly took his hand.

? Sheldon struggled formally, but was dragged by me helplessly.

? What a beautiful day.