【Double Black】As You Like It

Central Plains has never been afraid of high altitudes, because for him, the sky can be counted as his territory. When he was 15 years old, he was able to go to the altitude where the plane flew. Even the hypoxic environment in the high altitude could not help him. The behavior of controlling gravity has become an instinct of life such as eating and sleeping, so when he fell, he did not have Any panic, after all, the feeling of weightlessness has been used to it a few years ago, it is nothing at all.

However, it was a bit surprising to see Dazai Osamu's terrified expression when he first fell, which made people feel a little funny.

He was thinking, so this person would still care, even if he knew that he would not fall to his death at all.

After coughing twice, he controlled the gravity of his body and did not fall with those stone slabs.It is to control these things to crash into the building on one side, otherwise falling downstairs at this height will definitely cause casualties.

When the window of the building was smashed open, he himself fell in, lying flat on the floor full of debris, bleeding and spitting blood, and one arm has no feeling, probably because of too much pain, the nerve automatically shields Lost.He was thinking that there should be no problem in this way, as long as he saves Osamu Dazai, the other party should not seek death again, thinking about it, he felt dizzy and heavy, and it took a while to feel the pain in the back of his head, which hurt him I can't sleep if I want to sleep for a while.

But when the tense nerves were relaxed, there was no motivation to support myself like before, and I didn't want to move or talk, and even felt tired when I opened my eyes and breathed.Nakahara also wondered when he was in such a mess, and it wasn't because those enemies who didn't have long eyes to catch up took Osamu Dazai as a hostage to hurt him. When he thought of this, he became very angry, and the other party just made trouble for him all the time , from childhood to adulthood, from the time they knew each other to the present.

Fine.

I owe you.

Zhongyuan Zhong also turned over first. He felt that something was pressing on his back, but after moving for a long time, he found that he couldn't use much strength, so he just lay down like this.The arm has been so sore that I can't feel it, and if the back hurts a little bit, it seems that there is nothing wrong.He wondered when people from the port mafia would come over, and wondered if Osamu Dazai was still sleeping on his stomach on some floor, but he didn't wait for him to lie down for a long time before he heard movement not far away.

Nakahara raised his head with difficulty, and saw Osamu Dazai stumbling down covered in blood like him. Today, the two of them were still wearing casual couple outfits, and the prints on their chests were all glued together, looking nondescript.

It seemed that he had seen him, so it was obvious that he saw Osamu Dazai heaving a sigh of relief, and the other party staggered in front of him, looking down at Chuya Nakahara lying on the ground.And this person's face was still the blood that he dripped on it before.

Dazai Osamu's shoes stopped on top of his head, and then the man bent down and knelt on both sides of his head, bent down and pressed his face against his forehead.

Zhong Yuanzhong could also clearly feel that the other party was trembling, not like crying but also like crying, trembling and making a strange sound from his throat, trembling holding his head in his arms, they maintained such movements For a long time.Obviously didn't say anything, obviously didn't communicate anything, but Nakahara Chu could feel Dazai Osamu's sadness, which was exactly the same as his.

After a long time he said, my back hurts.

Osamu Dazai snorted, raised his head and put his arms around his upper body and dragged him into his arms, so he lay on the man's lap, lying in his arms, the other's arms wrapped around his neck and never let go.

"You know all about it."

"Yeah, I know all about it."

How could you not know, and how could you not know?

Those dreamlike and false illusions fascinate the eyes in the colorful world, just like the colorful Ukiyo-e, which can cover the sight with just one stroke.But he can always reach out, push aside the frivolous illusion, and touch the covered truth.And the reason why this can be done is only because of Osamu Dazai.

Anyone is good, anyone is fine, and it doesn't matter who is.For the Central Plains Zhongye, it is a non-discriminatory relationship.

He values ​​Mori Ogai because the other party is the leader, and he values ​​Ozaki Koyo and Hirotsu Yananami because the other party is the one who taught him.He needs to repay these kindnesses, and he cannot let go of these relationships.And other people, just because they are people in the world.

What is Dazai Osamu's meaning to him has long been forgotten. It is unnecessary, and there is no need to say it. Nakahara Chuya has never thought of making himself so tired in his life. If he is too tired, he will even live this matter. Things are getting harder.He acts according to his instincts and moves according to his heart, like wind and fire, blowing and burning casually.

When he liked Osamu Dazai at the beginning, he let himself like it. He felt that liking was meaningless, so he let himself go.

He thought it was true that he could not care, just like when he was 15 years old, he thought he could not care.

But it turns out that he could never not care.

"When did you know?"

"When you asked me for my phone number that night before, I felt something was wrong. If I had to say when I knew it, it was probably the second day after you moved in."

Osamu Dazai smiled on top of his head, hugged his forehead from behind and rested his forehead on his neck, even though it was covered in blood, he didn't seem to care.

"It's so fast, how come it's so fast."

"Fool, it's because it's me." Zhong Yuan Zhong also spoke in a very soft voice. He felt that he was about to lose too much blood, so he forced himself to open his eyes and look at the ceiling. Only a little light came in from the broken window, and the sun hit the body sparsely.

"Yes, because it's Chuya." Osamu Dazai also sighed like this, as if he suddenly thought of an answer, "Then why don't you mind, don't you think I'm not your Dazai Osamu?"

"What my Osamu Dazai, you really know how to talk." Nakahara was also a little surprised, he didn't expect 'Osamu Dazai' to say such a thing. "He'll probably be angry if you say that."

"No." The man lying on him said with a smile, "No, he won't be angry at all."

He was sure of this statement as if he was sure of some standard answer, he just listened and smiled, saying that it was impossible, he would definitely.

"It's also fake, it's for you to see."

"how do you know?"

"Because..." Osamu Dazai paused for a moment before saying, "I used to be like this."

They talked about it. He blinked his eyes and didn't ask this question, but he was really curious about another thing.

"What are you... now?"

"Ah, are you asking me and his status?"

"Ah."

Osamu Dazai hugged him again, holding him tighter.Everything around seemed to be hung by a hurricane. It was in a mess, and some buildings even collapsed. The ground was full of gravel and glass fragments. Just looking at it felt desolate.

"What is the reason why Chuya feels that there is no difference between me and him?"

"I didn't ask anything, my intuition. But if I have to say it, even if the experience and certain behaviors are different, the things that will be done in the end are the same. I think even Dazai in this case... ah, it's another , I will do the same." Nakahara Zhong also didn't really know how to summarize his thoughts, so he could only speak intermittently.

"To put it simply, no matter what the difference between the two of you is, you will end up with the same goal in the end. Since this is the case, there is no difference in essence. The two of you just experienced different things and have different lives, but as long as you Faced with the same situation, they will have the same behavior and conclusion. Under these conditions, it is equivalent to putting two identical people in different game environments to pass the level... Ah, although this analogy is not correct, but I Think you know."

Osamu Dazai froze for a moment, then buried his head and rubbed his neck vigorously, neither saying yes nor no, but Nakahara Chu also thought, it should be 'yes'.

So after a while, the other party's deep laughter came from the neck, so he slowly explained this matter to him.

"You must have watched a lot of movies. I won't explain the concept of parallel worlds. In a word, it has the same meaning, but it's a little special because 'we' are just different branches of the same person in different environments. That's all. In essence, there is only one 'person' in the same space, and the folded parts in this space create different possibilities. There is only one body itself, but there are too many folded spaces, which is equivalent to a body that can be in different worlds. Existence, carrying the soul of different possibilities at the same time." Speaking of which, Osamu Dazai paused for a moment, rolled his hair with bloody hands, rubbed it again when he was done, and did not let go of his hands sticky.

"So if you want to communicate with two parallel worlds that don't interact with each other, you can only use this method. But there is only one body, and jumping from the folded side to the other side requires the consciousness of this world Suppress it. So you are right, we are all 'Dazai Osamu', everyone."

Zhong Yuanzhong just lay in the other party's arms and listened. As he listened, he felt that the man began to bite his ear. "The body is his and mine. He is Osamu Dazai and I am Osamu Dazai. Even if they are different individuals, they are absolutely the same in essence."

Zhong Yuanzhong also understood the meaning, and didn't think there was any problem. After all, he had his own judgment on whether it was this person or not.In other words, he guessed right from the very beginning.

"Then why did you come here?"

He asked softly, feeling that he couldn't exert his strength.Osamu Dazai paused for a moment, and touched him with his icy hands. This kind of temperature made Nakahara Nakaya's drowsy consciousness sober a little, so he raised his head and turned back, looking into the man's dark eyes.

"Zhongye, tell me, why don't you choose me?"

Slowly, gently, slowly, like whispers in sleep in the afternoon, or whispers in the ear late at night, Osamu Dazai asked him like this, with an inaudible prayer in that inadvertent persuasion And confiding, Zhong Yuan Zhong also choked speechlessly, making him speechless.

It was not clear what it was, whether it was discomfort, or whether this request and inquiry was beyond his imagination.

However, without waiting for any reaction from him, the other party continued to speak.

"Look at me, I won't piss you off on purpose, I won't antagonize you on purpose, and I won't go out to have any other messy relationship. I will sleep wherever you sleep, and I will live wherever you live. I don't give you trouble. Trouble, I will not intentionally seek your work. I will wash the dishes when you cook, and I will mop the floor when you do the laundry. I can help you if you have any problems with your mission. I will not go to the armed detective agency. Because I won’t shout about suicide at home.” After speaking for a while, he paused, his voice was a little choked, and Nakahara Nakaya didn’t know what to do when he heard this, because in his impression, Osamu Dazai would never say make such remarks.

Like, a stray cat with a collar on it.

"I'm fine, I'm better than him, you see I'm so good, Chuya, do you want to choose me?"

If it was someone else, he might have already agreed, but Nakahara also knew that something must have happened to make Dazai Osamu say such a thing, something he didn't know happened.

So he didn't respond to this question immediately, but just asked.

"What about him?"

They looked at each other very close, and the silence pervaded the ruins. They were on the tall office building, the wall on one side was broken, and there was endless skylight outside. Looking at it from a distance, you can still see Yokohama's landmark buildings The five buildings of the Port Mafia.

Osamu Dazai smiled and said, As expected, for you Chuya, I am still different from him.

He didn't refute, but just said something else, because since you are all Osamu Dazai, I hope you can all live.

This is also the first time, he said to Osamu Dazai, I hope you live.

The person holding him was stunned, his wide-open eyes were full of shock, his trembling pupils changed colors under the sunlight, his arms hugging him tightened and strangled his bones, Zhong Yuanzhong didn't cry out the pain, just lifted his His eyes looked at Osamu Dazai's chin, which was still stained with the blood he had dripped on it before.

He said, Dazai, I never really wanted you to die.

Live, at least live with me, if I don't live long, you go to die, if I live long, let's live together.

Such words cannot be said, but the only thing that can be expressed in the end is, I hope you live.

"When I came, I actually jumped off the stairs."

He heard Dazai Osamu say this in a tone like talking about eating a burrito this morning, but Nakahara Chuya reflexively reached out and grabbed the other's fingers, so shocked that he didn't know what to say.

He didn't even know why his unconscious hand moved. He opened and closed his mouth for a long time to make a sound, but Osamu Dazai covered his mouth with his hand.

"It should be said that I came here during the process of falling from the building. I was surprised when I came here, even though I knew that there was... forget it, but in short, I belong to the state of death but I have not really died. I came here In time, the 'Osamu Dazai' here will pass, but it should also maintain a state of static flow of time, because logically speaking, it is me who fell from the building."

Osamu Dazai sighed deeply and bent down to kiss the side of his face, his tongue and lips stuck to the jawbone on the side of the face, kissing him thinly, as if he was sucking something.

It was all his blood over there.The other party didn't think the smell was too strong. She rubbed against his ear, rubbed against his temples, and kissed all the way down. When the kiss reached the corner of his mouth, he stopped him.

"What do you want to say?"

Osamu Dazai just smiled, and wanted to take his hand away and kiss him, but Nakahara Chuya only wanted an answer now, so he reached out and pressed his hand on the other's mouth, a little annoyed.

"What's the matter with you! What is falling from a building?! Jumped by yourself?!"

"Yeah, I danced by myself." The man simply stuck out his tongue and licked the palm of his hand. The animal, whose pitch-black hair had no luster, hugged him dejectedly, absorbing the warmth.

He heard the other party say, Chuya, it’s so cold, I’m so cold.

It's cold, it must be cold, just touching the body temperature of the other person feels cold through the heart.The blood on the two people's bodies was mixed together and it was hard to tell who belonged to which, so Osamu Dazai put his chin on the top of his head and continued talking in a rambling manner.

"Maybe I thought I had no regrets, and I could finally die, but when I jumped down, I felt very regretful. If I die, what will you do, Chuya?"

The other party spoke to him almost in a calm voice, and his voice trembled when he spoke.

"I don't seem to have left you anything, no wonder you hate me so much."

"Where was 'I' when you jumped?"

He almost grabbed the other person's clothes and shouted hysterically, "Where am I?!"

Nakahara also propped up his body from Dazai Osamu's arms, and yelled at the other party. He didn't believe that he would watch this person commit suicide by jumping off the building, and he would not let Dazai Osamu die as soon as he said he would.Osamu Dazai leaned over to kiss his eyes, and his tongue licked the eyelashes along the eyelids, which was wet with a cold temperature.

"Zhongye, none of this matters anymore."

The other party took his hand, squeezed his knuckles into his fingers and interlocked his fingers. Even though there were wounds and bloodstains in the palms of both of them, there was no hindrance. The two of them just maintained a very difficult posture. in ruins.

Osamu Dazai smiled and pushed him back into his arms again, with his back against the man's chest, raising his head to see the other's face, and Osamu Dazai lightly asked the next question.

"If you choose me, he will be squeezed into that world. If you choose him, I will go back. But when the choice is confirmed, time will probably continue to flow. At that time, whether it is me or him, both will fall Lou died. Zhongye, who do you choose?"