My Feelings Can Wait

The originally good atmosphere of the conversation was wiped out by Ji Youyan's sudden stupidity.Hearing Jing Xiu's advice, Ji Youyan covered her mouth in embarrassment, put down her phone and ran to the bathroom to wash up.

Soon she came back, her lips were red and moist, and she pleaded in a low voice: "I want to kiss it. It hurts to look at it..." Her voice choked up again as she spoke.

Jing Xiu's heart is warm.She wrapped her arms around her abdomen, half covering the scar, and said in a warm voice, "It's over." In fact, no matter how painful it was, it wasn't as painful as she was at that time.

Seeing Jing Xiu's embraced posture, Ji Yuyan suddenly said nervously, "Ah Xiu, are you cold?"

Jing Xiu was asked abruptly by her, and then looked at his nearly naked appearance in front of the camera, and felt ashamed belatedly.

She didn't answer Ji Yuyan's question, and reached out to get the pajamas on the quilt.She stretched her arms into the sleeves first, then stretched her waist and put her head in.

Ji Youyan stared intently at Jing Xiu's graceful body in the video, and swallowed inappropriately.Just when everything was about to be hidden under the clothes, Ji Youyan asked her curiously: "Ah Xiu, what is the English tattoo on it?"

Near the edge of Jing Xiu's scar, there is a line of small black tattoos, which Ji Yuyan can't see clearly.

Jing Xiu put on her clothes, subconsciously followed Ji Youyan's question, and stroked the tattoo on her ribs. "The first letter is F." She said lightly.

Many words came to Ji Yuyan's mind.

The tattoo was suggested by a friend when Jingxiu was in a bad mood a year after the breakup.

"When designing, tell the tattoo artist to 'forget'."

It goes without saying what to forget.Ji Yoo bit her lip.

"When I lay down, I regretted it." If you can really forget, why bother to tattoo "forget" on your body to become a memory.

It's just trying to cover up and deceive oneself and others.Jing Xiu curled her fingertips slightly, "Finally, I got forgive."

She lowered her eyes, with a hint of self-deprecation, "Unfortunately, you see, I didn't do well in the end with these two words."

It's forgiveness.Ji Yuyan's eyes were watery again. "No, Ah Xiu, you have done well enough."

She was glad that Jing Xiu didn't do it well, if Jing Xiu did everything, then what should she do now that she is still stuck in the same place and reluctant to leave.But she felt sorry for her, she felt sorry for her last life until the end, she still didn't do well, but she would never be able to wait for her scene.

Jing Xiu was noncommittal.She pondered a little, pressed the scar, and turned back to the topic that was interrupted by Ji Yuyan's action just now: "Yanyan."

Ji Youyan listened to Jing Xiu's next words with gentle eyes.

"Just like when I show you the ugliest scar on my body, I also feel embarrassed, anxious, and even afraid that you think my body is no longer perfect. However, I choose to believe you. Similarly, Yan Yan, if you put your You exposed your wounds to me, but I can't lick your wounds, instead I despise its ugliness, and you don't have to be nostalgic for a lover like me. Because it's not worth it."

"You don't even have such trust in me. Is it because I didn't do well enough to give you a sense of security?"

Ji Yuyan lowered her head and said shyly: "No, Ah Xiu, it's my own problem. Ah Xiu, I..." She tightened her five fingers holding the phone and continued: "I was kicked out of the house by my parents back then. It was as if the world view had collapsed. After that, the shadow seemed to never go away.”

Her eyes were wet: "At that time, I felt that I was alone in the north, and I had a feeling that I was rejected by the whole world. I suddenly discovered that what I learned from books when I was young, the so-called parental love is selfless and great. It's not entirely true. I am their ideal daughter, and they love me. I am not their ideal, and they can ruthlessly drive me away. I realized that even the people who are born with blood The love of my parents is conditional and can be taken back at any time. My self-protection mechanism seems to make me subconsciously unable to trust and rely on one person wholeheartedly. I don’t know. It’s not true that there will be someone who can fully accept me and love me for all the ways I am, including the imperfections I imagined to be different from hers. I’m... too scared to be abandoned again.”

Jing Xiu listened to her talking about her fear and saw her red eyes sadly, her heart ached unbearably.

But Ji Yuyan squeezed out a smile at this time, looked directly at her and said gently: "But I believe you now. Ah Xiu, I believe you. You are willing to give me another chance even when I was so unbearable. It's enough to show that you are real, you love me badly, don't you?"

Jing Xiu opened his mouth, but suddenly couldn't make a sound.Although she was happy to see Ji Yuyan's look bright, and although she really had no way to refute Ji Yuyan's conclusion, she really wanted to turn off the video and terminate the call.

After a while, Jing Xiu turned his eyes away and said with difficulty: "You are right."

Ji Youyan completely burst into laughter, Jing Xiu restrained his shame, looked directly at Ji Youyan and said, "But Yanyan, love is not enough in love. It is easy to fall in love, but difficult to get along with each other. I admit that I was not honest enough before. It's okay to be all-inclusive, and it ends up causing more and more problems between us."

"There is a problem with the way we get along. I even feel that it was my past tolerance that allowed you to not communicate. If we can't change the way we get along, we will never be suitable for each other. I don't want to be like before That's it, and I don't want to be like this again, I force you a little, you tell me a little. I can't do it forever as the initiative."

Ji Youyan was as tender as water, and promised: "Then I will do it. Ah Xiu, this time, can I take the initiative?"

Jing Xiu fanned her eyelashes lightly, showing a wavering expression.

"Would you like me to chase you instead?" Ji You said in a persuasive manner.

Jing Xiu lowered his neck, and after a few seconds, he said quietly, "Aren't you already chasing him?" The voice was soft, like a feather gently scratching Ji Yuyan's heart.

Ji Youyan's whole portrait was lit up all of a sudden, he licked his lips and said tentatively: "Then...then have you seen my sincerity and change?"

Jing Xiu answered her with an almost inaudible "Yes."

Ji Youyan's spirits lifted.She thought of something, struck while the iron was hot, summoned up the courage to invite Jing Xiu: "Ah Xiu, would you like to come and see my father?" It was a gesture of completely letting go of her own territory.

Jing Xiu's throat moved. In addition to being moved and happy, she also felt grievances and tears welling up uncontrollably.This invitation, how she used to wait from anticipation to death.

But she still suppressed her longing and asked Ji Youyan rationally: "Does your father know my existence?"

Ji Yuyan actually didn't know the answer.In the past two days, she hasn't had time to talk about this topic with her parents. When her mother asked her about Jing Xiu, she mentioned very little. Knowing or not, what is the attitude.But thinking about it, I guess it wouldn't be a good attitude to know.

She honestly replied to Jing Xiu: "My mother knows, my father, I don't know if he knows."

"Then what is your mother's attitude?" Although the general environment is actually much better than before, but Ji Youyan's family's traditions are conservative, and Jing Xiu dare not expect much from it.

Ji Youyan's expression darkened, "My mother...doesn't quite agree."

Jing Xiu's expression also darkened.She said softly: "Then are you sure, if I go to see your father now, won't your father be angry?"

Ji Youyan was speechless.

Jing Xiu understands Ji Youyan's intention to invite her at this moment, so she can be more considerate of her, now is not the right time.

"Yanyan, there are some things, don't be in a hurry. What I want is your attitude. You wait for uncle to get better first, and take care of the family affairs first."

Feeling Jing Xiu's thoughtfulness and generosity, Ji Youyan felt guilty and soft at the thought of his overwhelming sense of presence with Jing Xiu's parents, and thinking about his parents' unknown attitude and Lu Fang's ambiguous attitude.

Touching Jing Xiu's beautiful and gentle face on the screen, she felt infinite longing.It would be great if she was by Jing Xiu's side at this moment.I want to hug her, and I want to kiss her.But maybe, Jing Xiu will reject her?

According to what Jing Xiu agreed with just now and that he was chasing her, Ji Youyan asked Jing Xiu cautiously: "Ah Xiu, if there is a progress bar between us, then my heart, on the way to your heart, go How many processes have you completed?"

Jing Xiu was stopped by her question.

Afraid that Jing Xiu would say a terrible low number, Ji Youyan quickly saved himself and asked, "Is there 80%?" She said this ratio very guilty.

Jing Xiu recalled the orthographic characters drawn on the notebook...obviously there were none at all.However, she looked at Ji Yuyan's face that she was nostalgic for, and looked at the expectant and apprehensive look on her face, and silently made up for all the lack of "positive" in her heart.

"Yeah." She affirmed with red ears.

Ji Youyan smiled instantly.With a sense of stability, she pushed forward and said, "The 80% of the process, can I hug and kiss my face?"

Jing Xiu: "..."

Jing Xiu didn't speak, Ji Youyan took her as acquiescence.She made a final conclusion: "It's possible, then I'll write it down first."

Jing Xiu moved his lips, but finally did not refuse.It's not that she doesn't desire Ji Yuyan's hugs and kisses.

Ji You understood clearly, and said softly, "Ah Xiu, wait for me to go back." As soon as the words fell, she couldn't help but yawned.

Jing Xiu frowned and said, "How long have you not slept?"

Ji Yuyan rubbed his eyes and whispered, "I didn't sleep yesterday."

That is?Jing Xiu's face darkened a little, and she said in a low voice, "Go to sleep now." She could see that there was a bed behind Ji Yuyan, and she could sleep on it.

Hearing the displeasure in Jing Xiu's tone, Ji Youyan was a little sweet instead. "Okay, I'll take a shower."

After a pause, she said coquettishly, "Ah Xiu, can you stop hanging the video first, I want to watch you sleep."

Jing Xiu didn't speak.Ji Yuyan added: "You just put your phone on the bedside and just do your own thing. I won't affect you."

Jing Xiu sighed and said neither good nor bad.

But the phone was still leaning on the bed, "Go quickly." She took out a book and flipped through it, casually saying.

Ji Youyan was satisfied.Seeing that she really didn't care about her side at all, she turned off the speaker, reluctantly took several screenshots of Jing Xiu's profile, and then took her clothes and went to the bathroom.

A few minutes later, Jing Xiu found that Ji Youyan really didn't affect him at all - he didn't hear the voice from Ji Youyan's end at all.

She couldn't help but turn her head to look at the phone, only to see that the light on the screen had turned into a warm yellow.

The picture that the camera is facing can be vaguely distinguished as the frosted glass with a layer of white gauze in the bathroom.

Under the strong light of the Yuba, the figure of the person taking a bath in the cloth gauze can be clearly seen.Although you can't see your body at all, Ji Youyan's slender figure seems to be wiping shower gel: raising his slender neck, raising his hand along the neck, sliding all the way...

Every move, through the shadow, Jing Xiu can see clearly.

Did Ji Yoo-yeon do it on purpose? !It was as if a string had broken in Jing Xiu's mind.

Her heart was pounding and her ears were burning red.

Eyes, but can't move away at all.

The author has something to say: Sister Ji is cunning: Ah Xiu peeked at other people taking a bath, so ashamed~

Teacher Jing's ears were so red that they were about to bleed: I was reading a book, but I didn't see anything.

Sister Ji means a lot: Oh~~

Teacher Jing is annoyed: chicken coop warning!