healer love letter

The night is like a huge silent hourglass, swallowing up eternal time, chewing up people's sorrow and loneliness, using sorrow and joy as appetizers, and watching everything that happens in the world.

The room was well heated, and the sound of the clock on the wall moving was clearly audible in the middle of the night, ticking, ticking, and this ethereal ticking had never been so disturbing.

When Li Ying just hung up the phone, she walked to the window and saw Gao Le standing downstairs.Today's temperature is not high, although it is not below zero, but the north wind is blowing, which also makes people's skin tingle.Li Ying didn't tell him to come up, and he didn't knock on the door self-righteously, but just stood quietly at the bottom, too far away, his face was blurred into a small ball, so I couldn't see his expression.But it should be cold, his thin down jacket won't resist the cold wind, not to mention he hasn't brought a scarf yet.Looking at the standing posture, the neck is shrunk, and when you get closer, you may see trembling teeth.

In the beginning, Li Ying went to the window to look at it every 5 minutes, but she didn't dare to make too much publicity, so she just opened the curtains a small gap, and observed the people downstairs from the gap.

Then let him take a look for 2 minutes to see if Gao Le is gone.What he said was that you don't have to stand anymore, it doesn't matter how long you stand, it's so cold, you should go back quickly.In fact, I secretly hope that I can see him when I open the curtains. Although it hurts, it is better than him resolutely turning around and leaving.

The hands of the clock on the wall are almost pointing to twelve, and after that, it will be a new day.

Li Ying stood by the window without moving, and Gao Le below did not move.The two seemed to be confronting each other silently, comparing to see who would decide to take a step back first.

The huge night is the witness of the two of them, enveloping the sincerity in their hearts that they can't show to each other.

You are dying of pain, but you are even more afraid that he will be in the same pain as you.

Perhaps after a long time, obsessive lovers will understand that those who love each other should not become enemies in chess.It's about choosing to stand on the same side as this person, to fight side by side, to support each other, and finally to crown each other with crowns.

Gao Le called Li Ying tremblingly, his hands were cold, and his tone of voice was pleading.

He said Li Ying, look up at me, I don't believe you have nothing to worry about, your eyes are empty.I know what I feel you have, all throbbing, heartache, pain, struggle, I know you can't let me go, don't lie to yourself, okay?

Gao Le stood in the wind, and the wind in January was frighteningly cold. He was wearing a black short jacket and down jacket, without a scarf, and stood in the wind with his neck curled up.

Li Ying still hid on the window sill watching him, her heart twitching and hurting.You are a fool, you will freeze in such a cold day.

Finally, it was Li Ying who softened first, went to the bedroom and rummaged through the cabinets, found a few scarves, picked the thickest one, wrapped herself in a big down jacket, took her mobile phone and went downstairs.

Coming out of the warm heating room, Li Ying shivered subconsciously the moment she encountered the cold wind.He sucked in his nose, relaxed his muscles, and let himself gradually adapt to the outdoor temperature.

Seeing Li Ying come down, Gao Le twitched his reddened nose and opened his arms to wait for Li Ying to come over.Li Ying didn't lean into his arms like before, but kept a little distance, raised the scarf in her hand, and helped him wrap it around.

"Cold." Gao Le's eyes were a little red, and he looked at Li Ying with a smirk, like a child who made a mistake and was punished to stand, and finally got the forgiveness of his parents.

"Leng, you are still standing here, what if I don't come down all night?" Li Ying's eye circles are red, maybe it was blown by the wind, maybe it was when her fingers touched Gao Le's cold cheeks when she helped him put on the scarf Feel distressed.

"If you don't get down, I'll get into the car in a while and wait for you in the car."

Li Ying didn't speak, she took a step back after wrapping up the scarf, and looked at Gao Le through the cold winter wind and starry night.

"What are you doing here?" Li Ying asked, with anger and complaint in her tone.

Gale took a step forward. "Come to see you, I'm afraid if I don't come today, you won't want to see me again in the future." Gao Le was already frozen, his hands and feet were numb, and when he spoke, his teeth would chatter up and down, and his lips would tremble. have to.

"Love is beautiful, like the first ray of sunlight shining on the face through the floor-to-ceiling windows in the morning, like the fragrance of milk coffee with a touch of temperature in the afternoon, like the sweet potato stand passing by on the cold windy road at night in winter, like everything is out of reach And dreams of hope."

"I used to be self-righteous and careless about love. But now I'm afraid of making mistakes, and I'm afraid that I'm not doing well enough to make you feel that love is nothing more than that."

"Give me a chance, okay?"

Standing in the wind, Gao Le reached out to Li Ying with his frozen and unconscious hands.

"I can explain everything clearly, as long as you give me a chance to speak."

Almost trembling, he went to find Li Ying's palm.

Li Ying was a little angry at first, and anyone who heard such words for no reason would be furious.Someone told you that your lover does not love you, but treats you as a substitute for another person, that person is his unswerving lover until death, and death did not really separate them.

Can you not feel sad?I cut open a heart to you, and only exchanged a double sentence. How many grievances and unwillingnesses are pressed in the bottom of my heart, and they converge into a deep lake that cannot be swam.

The last time there was a misunderstanding between the two of them, Li Ying left Gao Le alone for a full month, not expressing his position or communicating, but only sulked himself, and then began to regret it afterwards.I thought, if I had given him a chance to explain earlier, would I have been able to avoid this month's pain earlier.

His mother's hysteria left a black mark on his childhood that cannot be easily erased. He lacks a sense of security, and it is not easy to establish a trusting relationship with others.The first time I accepted a person, I met a scumbag, so I haven't talked about friends since graduating from university.He is alone, with a lonely back, staggering and walking alone in this world.In fact, sometimes I want to find a place where I can get hugs, and I also want to build a warm haven for myself.

Li Ying was afraid that Gao Le would lie to her, and even more afraid that he would leave without looking back, so he turned his head three times at every step, thinking, as long as he catches up, I will hold his hand stretched out to me.

Then he took his hand.

Gao Le's hands were as cold as popsicles. In my impression, his hands were always warm, as if a small heating stove had been secretly installed. They had never been so cold as today.

Li Ying took Gao Le upstairs, and when she got there, she helped him turn on the water heater and the Yuba, without saying a word, let him go in and take a shower.Gao Le, who was being pushed into the bathroom, stopped, looked at Li Ying and asked, "Did you forgive me?"

Li Ying didn't say a word, she just stuffed him with a towel and told him to take a hot shower quickly so as not to catch a cold.

Having been in the cold wind for too long, the muscles all over my body became stiff.Encountering the warm water vapor in the bathroom, Gao Le's mood that had been ashamed all night finally met a little heating that revealed a faint hope. He stood under the shower head, thinking of the ups and downs of the night, his eyes gradually became moist.

Li Ying warmed up a glass of milk for Gao Le, and when he came out of the shower, he brushed his messy hair, and now he dared not go to the living room away from Li Ying.

"Drink this." Li Ying pointed to the milk on the coffee table.

Gao Le just walked over, not daring to sit too close to Li Ying, and deliberately chose a seat not too far away from him, but with a little distance.Covering the hot glass with her fingers, she observed Li Ying's reaction from the corner of her eyes from time to time.

is he mad

Did he forgive me?

After drinking a glass of milk without knowing the taste, Gao Le's eyes still fell on Li Ying, and he put the glass gently on the coffee table, and the moment the base of the glass touched the coffee table, there was a slight "clang" sound.

Li Ying put away the cup with a blank expression. As soon as her hand touched the cup, Gao Le grabbed her wrist and looked up to see a pair of eyes that seemed to be glistening with tears under the light.

"can we talk?"

Gao Le said that Li Ying's heart skipped a beat when they were talking. Although he dawdled and refused to speak, he didn't want to hear Gao Le's so-called explanation, but he was still standing at this fork in the road. Going forward, he I don't know what kind of story development will be promoted.

Li Ying withdrew her hand pretending to be calm, sat down slowly, looked at Gao Le expressionlessly, and spoke in a cold tone. "Then let's talk."

Gao Le said that he didn't want to talk more about Song Yan, because he believed that he had an inescapable responsibility for Song Yan's behavior.Song Yan's parents lived abroad, and his son followed him to China, and what was returned was indeed a set of bones.Song Yan's parents are open-minded. They are Chinese immigrants who immigrated to Canada after doing business. Although they were devastated, they did not blame Gao Le for the death of their son.

But Gao Le was never at ease. He always believed that it was his playful jokes that day that caused Song Yan's death.

He shouldn't have encountered these things, because he didn't have to go out to buy goods, that was Gao Le's job.

Out of love, he can tolerate Gao Le, but also out of love, Gao Le has no way to forgive himself.

But this is not the reason why Gao Le went to Li Ying.

The first time they met, he was drunk and dazed, he really regarded Li Ying as Song Yan, otherwise he would drag someone in the bar and cry.He wanted to hear Song Yan say forgiveness, even if it came from someone similar to him.

Gao Le also went to the psychological counseling center to find Li Ying. He wanted to see him again, just to see him again.But later things developed far beyond his expectations. He recalled the bits and pieces of his past interactions, but he couldn't think of when he completely fell into Dr. Li's place.Maybe it was the way he was at a loss when he received the flower that made him feel cute, or maybe it was because he was sleeping in Li Ying's consulting room with a stomachache, and Li Ying thought he was asleep and held his hand instead.Or maybe it was because of the hot air, Dr. Li pressed down his wine glass and said that you have a stomachache and don't drink any more.

The picture of wearing a black coat and looking up at the snowflakes in the heavy snow was frozen in my mind.Thinking about it now, Gao Le seemed to remember from a long time ago that there was unfathomable sadness in this person's calm eyes.

That day, Dr. Li rushed over, panting.He said that my heart beats only 1 times a minute, but when I see you, my heart beats 60 times a minute.

That was the most romantic explanation Gao Le had ever heard about heartbeat.

All the conversations that night were kept in Li Ying's heart. It was not so much a conversation as Gao Le's unilateral confession.He didn't say a few words, and spent the rest of the time in silence, listening to Gao Le's narration word by word.

The living room was brightly lit, and Li Ying didn't have Gao Le's floor lamp that could adjust the atmosphere, but in this dazzling light, Li Ying saw Gao Le spread out his true love confession bit by bit and put it on the table , and then put the decision in his hands.

"I've never cared about using a substitute. Song Yan was my ex. I admit that I loved him, and I loved him very much. I was also very sad when he died, so my time stopped for four years with his death. Years. Since he passed away in the summer of 14, until now, I’ve spent time drinking and drinking every day, living like an incomprehensible dude. But after I met you, everything changed. You gave me the courage to start again. I want to be serious Yes, to fall in love down-to-earth, not only physically, but also spiritually, the kind that I want to be with you and spend the rest of my life with."

"Did you hear it?"

"I really, really like you."

"I usually talk a lot, and I know a little bit of poetry and painting, and I can coax little boys and girls at my fingertips. But now I have a bow on my tongue, and my mind is blank. I don't know what I should say to make you trust me."

"After much deliberation, I can only tell you what I really think in my heart."

"Li Ying, I like you."

"If you are not used to talking about love and feel that this word is too heavy for you. Then I will not overstep the distance for you so far. I like you, very, very much."

Boss Gao was speechless halfway through his speech, which surprised Li Ying, as if this person had never run out of rhetoric, but at this moment today, he suddenly lost his routine, and every word came from the heart.Simple and honest, falling in the heart is a trace of warmth that spreads.

Saying too many love words is not as good as a word of love.

I like you and I want to be with you.

This is a simple idea, which begins with the animal nature of human beings, and is an immutable law engraved in the genes.

Li Ying finally understood at this moment that she might never be able to let go of the hand she was holding.

The author has something to say:

hug.