sick white moonlight

"You're leaving, right?"

That's what he told him that day.

His tone was calm, as if there were no accidents, and he seemed to have accepted the result long ago.

But in fact, this is not true.

He understood that he was just covering up.

The beating heart is always reminding him.

It hurts, it hurts.

However, the person in front of him didn't know anything about it.

His friends will never know what kind of feelings he has for him in his heart.

This feeling is so deep and so far away.

He buried it tightly in the farthest corner of his heart.

He didn't dare to be touched, and he didn't dare to tell anyone.

Because he knew that it was unacceptable.

His feelings are not accepted by the public.

He never even dared to speak.

Sorry, my friend, I'm in love with you.

"If it's going well, I think it should be."

"I hope I can apply to Stanford smoothly, because I haven't published any outstanding papers before. However, the professor said that the chances should be very high. He intends to bring my paper to a well-known Chinese mathematician who recently returned to China. , He thinks there are many bright spots in this paper, and if he can get affirmation, he will ask this mathematician to write me a letter of recommendation, so that I should be able to go to country M to study as a graduate student."

Lu Chen listened in a daze. Indeed, many students in his class had considered going abroad, but he was not included.

Except for those senior students who are particularly talented, famous at a young age, and have made a lot of achievements, they can get a full scholarship and go abroad smoothly. Others who go abroad may have to pay for themselves.

This is not a small amount. Just a plane ticket to fly over is as high as 1000 yuan, which is still relatively close. This is 80 yuan in the early 1000s. For a person with a relatively high salary, the monthly salary is also around The era of hundreds of dollars.

Even some students who went to study in Germany, because they could not buy air tickets, had to go through Moscow and take a train northward for five days and four nights to reach the school they were admitted to.

Lu Chen has never considered going abroad. After all, his family is not only not rich, it can even be said to be relatively poor. He originally wanted to find a stable and better job after finishing college, so that he could be better. Good care subsidizes his family, and he wants to earn more money so that his younger siblings can go to school.

Besides, he majored in economics. In fact, he regretted that he did not choose engineering.

However, compared with the Q major, the economics major of the B major is still very good.

In this era, whether it is college students or others, in short, there seems to be a wave of going abroad in the whole society.

Most people who love to learn hold a thick dictionary in their hands, and turn on the radio to listen to the English learning programs broadcast by the central broadcasting station.

The places where visas are processed are in full swing, and air tickets are in high demand, and they can't be bought at all when it's late.

"You should study hard too." He An ordered after thinking for a while.

"Since you have a bright mind, don't waste it too much."

He An is sincere, this is his sincere words.

He could see and understand very clearly that the person in front of him was a very talented person.

Not only is he quick in thinking, strong in learning ability, but also considerate in his actions. Compared with those with special talents who are purely obsessed with scientific research, he is more pragmatic and has a little more communication skills, which makes him convincing in handling problems.

It can be said that the person in front of him is definitely a talent to be made.

It's just that this person, because he stayed with himself for a long time, lost so much self-confidence.

But He An knew that he was special. Although he lost his memory and didn't know where he came from, he just had a feeling that his past was not ordinary.

As he began to study, he became more and more sure of this.

This knowledge is not unfamiliar to him, and it seems to be easy to learn without any effort.

The fool in front of him thought that everyone could be like him, so that he underestimated himself too much.

"Yes, I will study hard." Hearing He An's instructions, Lu Chen suppressed the bitterness in his heart and forced himself to smile naturally.

"So, when do you plan to go there?"

On the way back, Lu Chen was not as fast as usual, he walked slowly, as if he was taking He An to enjoy the scenery of the campus.

"It won't be soon. After all, time is tight. If there are no accidents, we will not go out until at least mid-August. It will be a troublesome thing to pass, but my mother has a relatively close relative who immigrated to country M in the early years. , should also be able to take care of me for a while, and help a lot."

"My mother said that relatives should help me contact a nurse there to take care of my life."

"After all, without the ability to walk, life is still very inconvenient." He An replied with some annoyance, "I just hope that when the time comes, I won't delay my studies too much."

"I see you, your mind is all about studying now, and you have nothing else to focus on." Lu Chen muttered in a low voice.

"Maybe, when I woke up from the hospital bed, I seemed to have temporarily forgotten everything in the past. I even questioned whether what I have now, what exists, is real."

"However, the moment I picked up the book, I decided that this is what I want to pursue." He An's tone was originally a little erratic, but at this moment, when the deep voice sounded slowly It is so powerful, full of affirmation, determination, without flinching.

At that moment, Lu Chen even felt ashamed of the feelings in his heart.

How could he be worthy of such a person?

……

Then the next week, Lu Chen was both happy and anxious on the way over.

He An's face was calm, but the slight curve of his mouth made Lu Chen very clear that this person must be in a good mood.

"Is everything going well?" He sat on the sofa, and could even be said to be intently looking at He An who was reading a book.

He An didn't face him, nor did he raise his head, his eyes turned to him.

Therefore, he watched very carefully, seriously, and could even be said to be engrossed.

When he realizes his feelings, he can't stop his actions and thoughts, but he will restrain himself and try to restrain his behavior.

But, not long after, he was leaving.

Maybe it is possible, this life will never come back.

In other words, when we meet again, it may be 30 years later.

From what the teachers in the school learned, he knew that many students seldom return to the land under their feet after going abroad. Even if they return, most of them are successful and famous, when they are a little older.

And again, this is what professors have always supported.

After all, the country under our feet is still too weak, and there are so many people living on this land, but the resources they get are so few, and even the technological level is far behind foreign countries.

If you want to engage in research, take the academic path, and want to go further, you have to study abroad.

After all, without enough reputation and ability, returning to the motherland will not bring more and greater help to the country under his feet.

"Very good, the mathematician is ready to write me a letter of recommendation, but he recommended me to go to Berkeley, because he has a relatively well-known mathematics institute there, and he intends to invite me there. The professor said that I must Cherish this opportunity." He An replied lightly.

"So you're not going to Stanford anymore?"

"Maybe, actually, the two schools are in the same city, but there are more Chinese in Berkeley. After all, it is a public university. The professor said that I may have a common language there. Moreover, if it is purely about the level of mathematics and the professor's , Berkeley is better. If nothing else, I should go to this school."

He An smiled and said humorously.

"Moreover, compared with private universities, public universities are generally fairer. I was not very sure before, so I didn't focus on going to this school. Unexpectedly, I was lucky, and I happened to meet that well-known mathematician. I have returned home. And my professor has a little friendship with him."

"This can be considered very lucky. After all, to be honest, I planned to go to Berkeley in the first place, but I was not so sure, so I could only make a second choice." He An squinted his eyes, and was actually very happy.

Lu Chen had no choice but to keep the name of this school firmly in his heart.

At the end of May, He An had successfully completed the visa application.

On the day of applying for the visa, Lu Chen also went.

It is true that there are a lot of people, everyone is busy applying for visas, and there are even many elderly women.

Of course, Lu Chen, who had been popularized by his classmates, also understood that many people who apply for visas go abroad by getting married.

The nationality of the spouse can be said to be rich and varied, including Western European, M country, and even Mexico.

Time passed so fast that at the end of June, Lu Chen, who went to take the TOEFL test with him, was a little surprised when he got his score.

He didn't expect that he would do well in the exam.

After He An saw it, he couldn't help rolling his eyes several times in his heart.

I practiced with him for so long last month, why am I surprised? He already has this level.

At the beginning of June of that year, the country began to pilot graduate schools in many key domestic universities.

This year, Lu Chen worked very hard and made rapid progress, so much so that a teacher who had always been optimistic about him contacted him and asked him if he planned to stay in school for his postgraduate study.

If it was a long time ago, before he met that person, he thought he might agree, after all, this is a good opportunity.

But now, he has changed his previous thinking.

He wanted to chase the direction the man was in, even if the hope was slim.