I can't lose to my ex today

Chapter2

What does first love feel like?

If you ask Edogawa Ranpo this question, she will say that the feeling of first love is like the kind of snacks that she often buys that change color after being stirred, which can make her feel this world that is like a transparent goldfish bowl to her. One of the few expectations, looking forward to what color it will become after stirring.

That's right, she was talking about her first love ex-boyfriend who was always playing tricks.

She and her predecessor named Gojo Satoru met in early summer 12 years ago.At that time, the Armed Detective Agency had just been established. Apart from the president, there were only two members, she and Akiko, and the scope of business was mainly in Yokohama.

In May of that year, the detective agency received the first commission from outside Yokohama. The government commissioned the detective agency to investigate a case that happened at the Tokyo Metropolitan High School of Magic. That was also the first time she came into contact with the so-called "Conjuration World".

Since this case does not involve "spells", and there are many factions in the magic world, and the fights between the various factions are complicated. Finally, after the stalemate, it was decided to find an outsider who did not involve the interests of the magic world to "objectively" investigate the case.So, through the government, they contacted the Yokohama Armed Detective Agency, a special detective agency that holds a "special ability opening license" issued by the government, an organization whose reputation is guaranteed by the government.

Unfortunately, at that time in Yokohama, there happened to be a commission from the army that required the use of Akiko's supernatural powers. The president was worried about Akiko's post-war PTSD relapse and worried about her personal safety, so he went as a bodyguard.Therefore, she had to complete the commission from Tokyo's magic circle by herself.And the chief farmer who played the bridge also repeatedly assured that after arriving at the Conjuration High School, the best bodyguards will be arranged there to protect her safety, so there is no need to worry.

In this way, she came to Tokyo, the most prosperous city in Japan, for the first time.

That day, as soon as she entered the scope of the High School of Conjuration, she saw the three "bodyguards" sent to protect her.

When we met for the first time, she felt... very annoying.

She has no problem with the other two, the only one she hates is the white-haired one... Super super annoying!

That white-haired man almost had the words "Heaven and earth, I am the only one" arrogantly printed on his forehead.

...Damn it, Master Luanpo is number one in the world!

The High School of Conjuration hoped that she would thoroughly investigate the case within a week.a week?Is a famous detective the kind of idiot who needs a week to solve a case? As long as he activates super reasoning, he can see the truth at a glance.

It went well, and the case was closed that day.

The high school of conjuration invited her for a week, so she finished the work ahead of time and in the remaining time, she naturally wanted to take a good look around Tokyo, and asked her three bodyguards to be her guides... The job of a bodyguard must be from beginning to end Well done!

And her change towards the hated Wujo Satoru probably started when she met the other party's head teacher Noctua Masamori.

The first time she saw Uncle Night Moth, she could tell that the top of his head...was a bit green.

So, unable to control her mouth, she subconsciously blurted out:

"Uncle, that 'girlfriend' you whispered on the Internet recently is a liar, hurry up and break up before the other party empties your wallet... More precisely, that's not your 'Internet girlfriend', it's your 'boyfriend' Yes, you were cheated by a man!"

After she finished speaking, she regretted it a second later... Well, the president has taught her not to tell all the "truths". Many times, adults don't like to hear the truth.

Past experience also tells her that this is true. Every time she tells the "truth", no one will be happy, but will be angry with her.

... Sure enough, everyone is an idiot!

Just when she was in trouble, cheerful laughter and warm applause sounded from the side.

Gojo Satoru ignored his already petrified homeroom teacher, laughed happily, and asked enthusiastically, the pair of blue eyes behind the sunglasses seemed to be shining:

"Is there any more?! Is there any more?! What else do you see? The uncle in front of you still has some little secrets, please tell everyone to make everyone happy!"

Gojo Satoru, who doesn't think it's a big deal to watch the excitement, is also spreading his wings on the edge of the patience of the head teacher today.

This made her stunned for a moment, blinked her eyes, and looked at the person who was already laughing and trembling:

"Do you think this... is funny?"

It’s certainly not fun to expose your own “secrets”, but how could it not be interesting to expose other people’s “secrets”, Gojo Satoru nodded fiercely:

"Super-fun!"

In an instant, the two who were originally tit-for-tat seemed to have found a like-minded person, and under this natural attraction, they took a step towards each other.

Of course, from the perspective of bystanders, this situation is——

Bear kid x2, tsk.

She is a person who hates common sense, even more useless knowledge, and doesn't like being bound by those stupid social dogmas.

As it happens, Gojo Satoru is also a person who hates theories, and he hates being taught or even restrained by those so-called theories.

After having the opportunity to get to know each other, the two hit it off.

She is usually taught by the president to try to learn the ways of the world that she doesn't like, while Gojo Satoru is tired of those rotten orange-like upper-levels harassing him with those positive opinions, so when the two get together, they are more able to release themselves.

And this, in the eyes of bystanders, is——

Destructive power x2, tsk.

In the following week, she was taken around Tokyo by her three "bodyguards". Although the white-haired one in the "bodyguards" was still so annoying, but... Hey, forgive him!After all, she has seen too many stupid people, and it is rare to meet someone who is also stupid but very interesting.

She's always been extra lenient with people who amuse her.

... Well, except when grabbing her snacks!

The one-week Tokyo tour ended soon, and not long after returning to Yokohama, she received a large package from Tokyo, which was sent to her by Gojo Satoru.

A large box full of Pokémon White Sea Lion dolls in various shapes, one of which was specially customized to wear sunglasses!

There is also a note in the box with five messages written by Satoru——

[Since you said that he looks like a white sea lion, then I will give you all kinds of white sea lions, so that you can think about him every day when you see things and think about others~ When you sleep with a white sea lion doll, you will never let it go in your dreams Yours~]

It was also accompanied by a stick figure portrait of himself, and the expression of the portrait was still pretending to be shy.

As a famous detective, she naturally saw through this man's intention at a glance... He did it on purpose!Definitely on purpose!Deliberately trying to disgust her to death!

Wasn't it the last day in Tokyo, when she won a game in the video game mall to exchange for gifts, she asked for a Kodak duck doll, but he thought the Squirrel was cute, so she finally chose the white sea lion and gave it to Uncle Moth as a farewell By the way, the gift hopes that this fluffy doll can heal the heart of Uncle Moth.

... Although Uncle Noctua looked down at the white sea lion doll in his arms, and then looked up at Wujo Wuhou standing in front of him, it seemed that he was even more sad?

In short, no matter what, she still wants to say that the Kodak Duck is definitely cuter than the Squirrel!Five turtles with bad taste!

When she couldn't help venting her anger at the white sea lion dolls that filled the detective agency's office, the president who didn't know the truth stopped her:

"Luanbu, gifts represent other people's wishes, so treat them well."

And she who was in a fit of anger yelled back without even thinking about it:

"I don't want this kind of 'heart'! I hate white sea lions the most... I hate white hairs, white hairs are so annoying!"

Silver-white hair, also belongs to the "white-haired" president: "..."

...was, hated? !Was he hated by Chaos? !

Realizing that what she said just now put her favorite president into the category of "hate", she repeatedly redeemed:

"No, no, the president is not included!"

Huh, that's why she said that the white hair named Wujo Wu is the most annoying!Nasty white sea lion!

……

Yes, first love feels like that snack that changes color when stirred.

Stirring a new color with anticipation, and then biting it down... Only then did I realize that there was some dark seasoning added in it, bah bah bah!

"Ah, as expected, none of us won the lottery last month..."

In Yokohama, in the office of the Armed Detective Agency, Atsushi Nakajima sighed regretfully, comparing the results of the lottery announced in the newspaper.

On Valentine's Day last month, the president hadn't come back from a business trip. Tanizaki Junichiro was dragged by Tanizaki Naomi to go to the "Valentine's Day" that belonged to the two of them. Izumi Kyoka was called by Ozaki Koyo and said yes To prevent being caught by some brat under the influence of the festive atmosphere, Yosano Akiko organized other single female members to go drinking together without getting drunk and not returning. Edogawa Ranpo, who didn't want to drink, chose... and the club The bachelors act together.

It happened to be the weekend rest day, so a few people went shopping in Tokyo.While shopping in a shopping mall, I saw a lottery draw with shopping receipts, so I joined in the fun and participated.The merchant is also tantalizing, saying that the results of the lottery will be announced in a month.

On the page in the newspaper, on the lottery results surrounded by promotional advertisements from merchants, no one from Butei Club matched the number of the lottery ticket that was chosen with enthusiasm.

"Well, maybe it's a couple's day after all, and the god of lottery probably won't take care of those of us who haven't even celebrated Valentine's Day..."

Atsushi Nakajima smiled awkwardly and explained.

A group of mother-fetal solo people in the office: "..."

At this moment, an "abrupt" voice sounded from a corner of the office——

"Don't confuse famous detectives with you."

As soon as this remark came out, everyone in the room quickly attracted the attention of everyone in the room. They all looked at the mascot of the detective agency (crossed out) who was leisurely crossing his legs on the desk and dangling a bottle of pop soda. Pillar.

Miss Ranpo ever had a boyfriend? !

The reason for using the past tense of "have been" is because they are very sure that there has never been a male species that can be called a "boyfriend" around Ranpo Edogawa in the past few years!

The only veteran member of the detective agency who knew about the past, and Akiko Yosano, smiled and said nothing, but looked at the famous detective lady who was indifferent on the surface but already swollen inwardly when the ex-boyfriend was mentioned at the moment.

She still still remembers that that winter, Edogawa Ranpo went to Tokyo to celebrate the birthday of the conjurer, and when he came back from Tokyo, he announced to her and the president excitedly—[Ranpo The grown-up is now a man with a boyfriend! 】

The president's first reaction at the time was... Ranbu must have been cheated!Do you really know what love is?And shouted [Random!You are only 16 years old! 】

Although she wanted to say that Miss Ranpo's age was already higher than the average age of first love in Japan, she still couldn't stop the president's desire to go to Tokyo to confront that boy.

After that, these two people dated for more than seven years... although I don't know how many times they separated and reunited.Sometimes it is because of some big differences, sometimes it is because of some trivial matters. The longest time to break up is almost three months, and the shortest time is to break up in a dessert shop in a second, and the next second after the dessert is served. Let's eat dessert together again.

It wasn't until four years ago that they completely announced their breakup, ending this period of flamboyant first love youth.

But at this moment, Edogawa Ranpo, who has attracted the attention of all detective agencies, glanced at these surprised "little brothers" and "little sisters", and his face that seemed to never show his real age showed that he was a mature adult. pride:

"What's surprising, the famous detective is already 27 years old."

At this time, everyone realized that the unshakable "social favorite" of their Armed Detective Agency was, in fact, already... an absolute adult in his third year.

At this time, Atsushi Nakajima boldly asked tentatively:

"Miss Ranpo's ex-boyfriend... Who is he? What does he do?"

Edogawa Ranpo replied calmly:

"It's a teacher."

...I mean, the accident is very common!

The expressions of everyone in the detective agency expressed this idea in unison.

Kunikida Doppo: "Miss Ranpo's ex-boyfriend actually walked with me before."

Tanizaki Junichiro: "I thought it would be a person who is engaged in a relatively special profession."

Atsushi Nakajima: "Yes, yes, I thought it was a special criminal police officer, such as the public security or something."

Quan Jinghua: "I thought it was a killer."

Miyazawa Kenji: "I thought it was a magician."

Osamu Dazai: "Hey, it's so normal... I thought it was an alien~"

I saw Ranpo Edogawa curled up on the swivel chair, and then turned the swivel chair with the back of the chair facing everyone, expressing his refusal to continue discussing the topic of his ex-boyfriend:

"...It's been many years since we broke up! I can hardly remember what he looks like."

By next Saturday, it will be four years since we broke up.

...Well, the detective didn't remember the date of the breakup on purpose!It's just that this information is too easy for a famous detective to remember, it's as simple as eating rough snacks when you're hungry!It's so simple that it's hard to forget, so it's so annoying!