no one save me

Jiang Yihang is merciless when he scolds others, and he is also merciless when he scolds himself. He is a ruthless person. I can only take away the fruit knife. It doesn’t matter if he is dead. I can’t drag my sick body to jail, which is too bad.

I thought that things were almost over here, and no matter how outrageous the farce was, there should be a limit, but what I didn't expect was that Lu Qiao, who had been missing for a few days, was found at this time.

In fact, these days when he is not here, I can guess what he is doing. Wang Bo has less than half a year left. People are like this. No matter what happened before or after, when people are about to die, they will Harvest unlimited sympathy and care.

I remember the three wounds on Lu Qiao's back, remember those twisted spines, remember how he told me when the car accident happened, what the fractures looked like, and how painful they were.

But after thinking about it, I don't feel any more, it's just that I know such a thing.

When Lu Qiao saw Jiang Yihang in my ward, his expression was not good. The atmosphere between the two of them was like a gunpowder keg. It exploded at one touch. This thing can be blown up anywhere, but don’t make a fuss in front of my eyes. I'm exhausted enough to have to deal with this shitty thing, it's going to take lifetimes to get this bad.

"Why are you here?" Lu Qiao's words were not polite. He looked at Jiang Yihang and then at me, as if he wanted to say something to me, but because Jiang Yihang was here, he still didn't say it.

Jiang Yihang sneered, glanced at Lu Qiao inexplicably, and then went out.

No one told Lu Qiao about my illness, and I didn't say anything, I just thought that since it's okay, it's a lie to say that we can still be friends, there's no need to lie to yourself, if you haven't been in a relationship before, it's just a pure friendship I can still laugh and tease a few words, but just now and the situation, I really can't laugh.

"Wang Bo's condition is serious. He was rescued the night before yesterday and woke up this morning." Standing in front of me, Lu Qiao looked at the cigarette in my hand and said hesitantly, "You are not in good health..."

"So what do you want to tell me today? I don't know any doctor. I really can't help you or him in this regard." I said.

He seemed to be stunned for a moment, and then shook his head quickly: "I didn't mean that... I will deal with his affairs. What I want to ask now is your situation, what's the matter? What's going on?"

The cigarette butt smelled a little bit of smoke, I bit it, thinking about how to answer this question.

"You asked me before, if one day Jiang Yihang was going to die, would I forgive him?" I leaned on the sofa, propped my forehead with one hand, thought carefully, and then said, "Actually, what you wanted to ask at that time It wasn't Jiang Yihang, but Wang Bo, right?"

Lu Qiao pursed his lips slightly, he looked at me and did not refute this sentence.

"You said that he didn't ask you for money at that time, and he didn't even look at you in such a big car accident." I laughed, looking at his face full of love words, thinking about the past Those events in Suzhou that could be called crazy, I couldn’t help feeling amused: “Are you still sticking to your previous views?”

"I blamed him wrongly. He went abroad for medical treatment. He just didn't want to make me sad." Lu Qiao lowered his head, and after a while, he whispered, "Do you hate me like I hated him back then? .”

"No." I really didn't lie to him about this, I just felt tired and had to deal with everything. I was like swimming in the sea. When I couldn't hold on anymore, I thought I saw the shore, but when I swam there, only to realize that it was an illusion. This is only the sea, where is the shore.

Tired is really tired, like the feeling of drowning, so depressing that people can't breathe.

"Will you forgive me? Will you continue to be with me?" Lu Qiao asked me.

"I forgive you, but I don't like you anymore." I sighed deeply: "You are different from Jiang Yihang, but unfortunately, neither is suitable for me."

"It is impossible for me to continue to be with Wang Bo. I like you, Zuo Qi. I didn't tell you about Wang Bo, just because at that time I wasn't sure if he lied to me. And to annoy you." I listened carefully to Lu Qiao's explanation, I thought I would be very angry when I heard this, according to my previous temper, maybe my fist had hit Lu Qiao's body, but I didn't.

I was so calm that even I was surprised. I didn't feel anything in my heart. I couldn't tell whether it was numbness or emptiness. It was more likely that I was completely emptied.

I'm not sad, I'm not angry, if it's gone, it's gone, it's life.

"We haven't broken up, I don't agree." He stepped forward to me and said word by word: "You can't throw me away just because I made a mistake once, and never want me again."

"I didn't leave you behind." I got up and opened the window, then went back to the sofa and sat down, lit a cigarette, and the first puff I took in, my lungs began to hurt, like gravel in my throat and trachea Rubbing, itching, but inexplicably happy, I told him: "You can't forget Wang Bo, you should tell me, instead of dragging it out and being discovered by myself, you understand that this is a completely different relationship between two people. Different concepts, I won't interfere with your feelings, but I don't think there's any need for the two of us to be so sloppy, when we were together, I didn't go around with you, and now we're separated, I won't go around with you either."

"I can't forget him!" Lu Qiao kept correcting me, he insisted, "Zuo Qi, it's not that I can't forget him, but even if he's a stranger, I can't just stand by and watch him die. I didn't tell you that I met him because at that time I thought it was fake that he was sick, so I wanted to solve these things before you knew it, but I didn't expect..."

"Stay with him well, it's been half a year." I was smoking a cigarette, and I didn't need to look in the mirror to know how dishonest this look was, but I have always been like this. There have been too many shackles imprisoned on me these years, and I Almost forgetting what kind of person I was, I smiled and told him: "Don't leave any regrets."

If a person is really dead, it is useless to regret it. Wang Bo only has half a year left. What Lu Qiao does is his business. I just want to remind... the irretrievable feeling after losing is very painful.

"Did you really love me?" Lu Qiao looked at me blankly, and asked softly after a while: "I don't see any hesitation or sadness from you, and you don't even have the anger that Jiang Yihang had when he cheated."

"Have you cheated? Have you slept with Wang Bo?" I asked him.

"No." He immediately denied it, and pulled his face down: "Do you think I will do this?"

Lu Qiao and Jiang Yihang are similar in some respects, but they are different in this respect. I know the answer, but I don't want to answer it.

"We don't break up. My care for Wang Bo is purely between friends." Lu Qiao tried to hold my hand, but I avoided him. He stared blankly at the lost hand for a moment, and then smiled wryly: "Zuo Qi, we finally got together."

"The contract with Lu's Group is about to expire. I read the documents and I don't plan to renew the contract. Mr. Lu, it seems that you have to find another partner." I said.

I don't know whether this incident hit Lu Qiao hard or the title "President Lu", his face turned pale at a speed visible to the naked eye, and he stared at me intently.

"Zuo Qi, tell me after you think it through." Lu Qiao's breathing gradually became stagnant, and I could see that he was holding back, trying his best to calmly tell me: "If you say we are together, we will be together; if we say we are apart, we will be separated." , I don’t even give me a little room to turn around. I admit that I did something wrong with this matter, but I didn’t do anything to really apologize to you. I really like you and I really want to be with you , grow old, we can't get a marriage certificate in China, we will go abroad, I will help you get whatever you want, I want you to have a good life, I want you to be by my side, you just tell me so lightly, You don't want me anymore..."

"I think clearly." A cigarette was smoked quickly, I held it between my fingers, and the hot ash hit my skin, I was pulled back a little by the pain: "In other words, we are not suitable."

"Zuo Qi." He called my name, and I responded, our eyes met, and I saw my current appearance in his pupils.

"If I had known that I would get to where I am today, I shouldn't be with you." I rarely regret doing something, and this is one of them. I told him: "When two people get along, from friends, Become a lover, but you can't change from a lover to a friend... At least it's like this with me, in the future you will meet better, you like more, I wish you happiness."

His face became extremely ugly in my every word, and then I saw his eyes were red, and he looked at me almost stubbornly: "I was wrong, I shouldn't not tell you this, but I don't want to break up, I really don't want to break up...Zuo Qi, tell me, after talking to someone like you, how can I like others? "

This sentence is very familiar. It seems that when I was with him, he once said something similar. He said, "People who have been in love with you must not be able to like others again." It's not right to do things.

"No, you can do it." There was only the last cigarette left in the cigarette case. I didn't move my eyes. I stopped looking at Lu Qiao's reaction and just stared at the last cigarette. I told him: "Next time Open for half a year, a year...you will forget the most unforgettable things, and then you will meet someone you like more."

"Just like I used to think that I would only love Jiang Yihang in my life, but you see, after we separated, didn't I fall in love with you again? People are like this." I laughed and said calmly : "What you are going to do now has nothing to do with me. When you walk out of the door of this ward, bridges return to bridges, and roads return to roads. Let's just pretend that things in Suzhou never happened."

He looked at me and suddenly laughed, got up and took two steps back: "It didn't happen...it didn't happen..."

When he left, the door was slammed loudly. I closed my eyes and leaned on the sofa to rest.

Under the effect of the medicine, I feel drowsy every day, and I can’t sleep enough, but the nosebleeds are indeed less, I think this is slowly recovering.