Difficult to return

Song Shuhua got off the bed with bare feet, took the cup from her husband's hand, leaned against the other side of the sliding door, sat on the floor, and took a sip from her husband's wine cup.

"Can't sleep?"

"I'm not used to being so relaxed all of a sudden." Lu Mingchen stood up, shaking his head with alcohol, then went to the wine cabinet to get a whole bottle of wine and another glass.He poured himself half a glass and refilled it for her husband.

"There are other solutions to insomnia. Don't drink alcohol all the time. It's bad for your health. Look at my dad, he's still young, and his health is already broken." Song Shuhua said so, but he brought the wine glass to his lips again.

Lu Mingchen ignored him and kept looking outside: "The night view here is very different from City A..."

Song Shuhua followed her husband's gaze and looked out from the balcony. There were no towering buildings in City A here, and there were no lights as bright as daytime.Although it is the peak tourist season, the small island has never been able to gather the heavy and dense popularity of the big cities, and the little voices under the balcony seem quiet instead.

"...somewhat like my hometown."

Lu Mingchen's hometown is a seaside town.

He seldom went home, and Song Shuhua went back even less, and went back with him once when they got married.I don't know if it's because the wedding was held in winter, but Song Shuhua's impression of that small town was always gloomy and bleak, and when he went to the seaside, there were black waves rolling over the black rocks.There is no sunshine, sand and blue sea in Phuket.

"I lived there until now. In the first ten years of my life, the most impressive thing is the window.

"The window of the classroom, the window of the tutor's house, the window of my room... I always sit behind the window and look out, it's like a world I can't enter... I can only look at it through the window... "

Looking back on the first few decades of his life, Lu Mingchen just felt depressed and never knew what heartless happiness was.

All his energy and time are spent on studying, and he has no time to experience anything else.But he doesn't blame the parents who imposed learning tasks on him. They are adults who have seen the truth of life clearly. They know that if children in small places want to succeed, even if they have good qualifications and talents, they must put in all their efforts.

He always sits behind the window, fantasizing about what the outside world has, and gradually loses all interest in the outside world. The only belief that supports him is probably to win, to take the No.1 exam, and to be a successful person.

He did it too, by seizing every opportunity and doing his best.He is a veritable achiever and a leader among his peers.

On the contrary, his husband is a complete loser in the eyes of everyone, even if he has a good education, a good family, and an excellent partner... He is like a wild flower surrounded by flowers. Unremarkable.

But the husband willingly became a loser.What surprised Lu Mingchen was that someone would be willing to be a loser.

He voluntarily withdrew from the company's business after marriage, otherwise Lu Mingchen would not be the current CEO.Can play the piano and sing, and never try to use this specialty, willing to teach children.He was so unambitious that he couldn't even support the wall with some mud, but Lu Mingchen clearly saw that he was very happy.

Cooking is also very happy, doing housework is also happy, tidying up the room will hum a little song, and I don’t forget to make some tricks for everyday meals.The contempt and insult of others will be ignored by him indifferently, as if he has a pure world of his own, and there is inexhaustible happiness in that world.

Lu Mingchen was attracted by that kind of world, and he jumped on it desperately, but he could only peep through the window, and finally failed to enter.

"Mingchen, are you drunk?"

The husband seldom talks about himself. In his eyes, confessing and opening up is a kind of weakness and shame.Although his articulation and logic were still clear, Song Shuhua knew that he was already drunk, and his self-esteem could no longer cover up his cowardice when he was so drunk.

"Fortunately...not drunk..."

He put down the cup in his hand and pulled Song Shuhua's ankle.

The person who was caught suddenly was a little frightened, and subconsciously wanted to shrink back.Lu Mingchen pressed his legs, arched his body, and crawled towards him from the floor.When he got close, he wrapped the man between his arms, and covered his face with his alcohol-smelling breath.

"Ah Hua, can you open your window for me too...I am your husband, you should let me in..."

"..."

"Ah Hua... all these years, I really want to have no reservations about you, but it's really tiring..."

"You're drunk." The husband lay on top of him, and he held the other's arm to prevent him from accidentally falling.

"Ah Hua, you married me because you liked me, right?"

"..."

"Ah Hua..."

In the dark, Song Shuhua didn't dare to look into her husband's drunken eyes, but there were bursts of sadness and shame in his heart.

"Go to bed and go to sleep."

"Ah Hua...do you love me?

"Do you really love me? I don't know, please tell me..."

Song Shuhua simply held his husband's face and covered his mouth with a jerky kiss.

Lu Mingchen, who was kissed, finally calmed down, and his body completely relaxed. He embraced his husband's back indulgently and intoxicated, and responded positively. After a while, he turned against the guest, pressed Song Shuhua on the floor, and kissed randomly.

Song Shuhua looked sideways at the night sky outside, and a round and white moon hung high in the sky.It was another moonlit night, reminding him of the night when Lu Mingchen kissed him for the first time.

Time flies, people's hearts change with the ups and downs of time, feelings are contaminated by impurities and influenced by interests, only the moon in the sky is as white and pure as ever, as if it was the same one back then.

The next day her husband woke up as usual, Song Shuhua didn't know if he really didn't remember it, or if he deliberately didn't remember it. In short, it wasn't a good memory for Song Shuhua, so he didn't mention it anymore.

Lu Mingchen himself grew up by the sea, so it's not a problem to eat seafood for three meals a day.

He ate shrimp noodles in the morning, and at noon he said he would eat curry crab and grilled oysters.He is very down-to-earth in terms of food, and he doesn't care whether the place to eat is a high-end restaurant or a small street restaurant.

In the afternoon, the two went out to sea for diving and surfing.For dinner, Lu Mingchen chose a seafood stall run by a Chinese.

After going out to play, I felt relaxed, and even relaxed a lot in my diet. Both of them ate more than usual.After dinner, I went to Patong Beach to take a walk to digest food.

They wandered slowly along the shoreline.Patong Beach was developed relatively early in Phuket. It has complete facilities and a strong commercial atmosphere. There are also many more tourists than other beaches.

As night fell, they went to the night market in the south, where it was very lively, and the smell of food from the open-air stalls diffused, attracting tourists, but Lu Mingchen doubted the hygiene here, so he only bought two coconuts.

Opposite is the bar street, Lu Mingchen went to visit, thinking that nothing would happen if he took him with him, and was thinking about whether to bring her husband in for a drink.But her husband has tugged on his sleeve, meaning to let him go.Lu Mingchen dismissed this thought, turned around and wanted to go back.

At this time, a lean and dark Chinese man came over: "Don't you two know where to go to play? The second show of the famous Simon Simon show is about to start, do you want to go see it?"

"Not interested." Lu Mingchen said indifferently.

But the man did not give up, and persuaded: "How can you not be interested? If you come to Thailand and don't watch the ladyboy show, is it not for nothing? I still have two tickets here. Seeing that you are all Chinese, I will sell them to you cheaply."

Lu Mingchen ignored him and pulled Song Shuhua back.

The man followed along, and started chatting familiarly: "Are you two gay?" Glancing at the hands they were holding, "I'm married. Thailand is very friendly to gays. Where did you go before?" Already? I’ve been here for more than ten years, and I can introduce you wherever you want, to ensure that you have a good and cheap time.”

Song Shuhua had the hardest time coping with such enthusiasm, so he politely refused again: "No, thank you."

This kind of tourist eater is the best at reading people. When he saw Song Shuhua, he would be right, so he quickly took out the ticket: "The original price is 20, I will sell you [-] yuan, and each person earns [-] yuan more. When I lined up to buy tickets for you early in the morning, did you invite me to drink coconut water?" He shook the ticket, "The performance is really good, the actors are beautiful, singing and dancing from all over the world for more than an hour, the price of this ticket is absolutely value."

Song Shuhua pursed his lips. He naturally wanted to see them. Compared with the transvestites, he wanted to see their gorgeous and beautiful costumes. Costumes are also a highlight of transvestite shows.It's just that Lu Mingchen was not interested or even disgusted, so he didn't mention it.

The man saw his vacillation, and continued to encourage: "It's just ahead, just a few steps away, whether you want to see it or not, how about you go to the door and have a look before making a decision? You want to come to Thailand and don't even watch the ladyboy show." , that would be a huge loss..."

Song Shuhua stopped, and Lu Mingchen stopped with him, turning his head to look at him.

"Mingchen, how about we..."

Before he could finish his sentence, his husband asked coldly: "What is there to see in such a perverted performance?

"A bunch of freaks who are neither male nor female. I only feel deformed and uncomfortable when I see them. This kind of evil deeds imposed on human beings requires people to watch, buy tickets, and applaud. Don't you feel uncomfortable?"

Song Shuhua lowered his eyebrows and stopped talking.

On the contrary, the scalper who sells tickets couldn't help it: "Hey, how do you talk? There are beautiful transgender people, some of whom are better-looking than celebrities, how come you say they are perverts? Do you have the quality? .”

Seeing Song Shuhua like this, he remembered that night at Queen again. Could it be that he wanted to find some kind of common ground or comfort from these transgressive people?Lu Mingchen felt even more depressed, and his tone towards the scalper became worse.

"Since it's so good, why don't you try to change it yourself, it's definitely more profitable than being a scalper."

"Hey... you, this is the local culture of the people. If you don't understand it, please respect it."

"There is still a culture of cannibalism in African tribes, do you have to respect it?"

"You...you...fuck, crazy..."

Song Shuhua took her husband's arm: "Mingchen, stop talking. Let's go, we're going back."