not brilliant

Jing Can cried until the end and lost his strength. In fact, for the past two days, he had been relying on the little thoughts in his heart to hold on, to come to Huihe, to find He Pingyi.He fell asleep in He Pingyi's arms, and when he woke up again, it was already night, and he had already changed into clean clothes.

Lying on the bed in the bedroom, he opened his eyes and saw He Pingyi's face. He thought he was dreaming again, and when he was fully conscious, he picked and picked and pieced together the broken memories of the past two days.He Pingyi's body was very warm, Jing Can raised her head, stared at that chin in the dark for a long time, then shook her head slightly, and rubbed He Pingyi's chin with the tip of her nose.

A hand suddenly pinched his chin, and then, he felt the person holding him move and kissed him.

"Thirsty?"

Confused by the hot breath, Jing Can heard He Pingyi ask him this.

Jing Can nodded without opening her eyes.

Sensing that the people around him were about to push him away, Jing Can subconsciously gave He Pingyi a hand.But the action was done in a hurry, one hand slipped from He Pingyi's waist without grabbing anywhere.

Sensing the sound, He Pingyi touched Jing Can's hand that had fallen on the bed, held it and squeezed it twice, like a silent whisper.

"The water is right next to the bed."

He Pingyi leaned forward and turned on the desk lamp.He didn't turn the lights on the brightest, but just shone a very weak light.

Jing Can squinted her eyes, and waited until she got used to the sudden darkness, before getting up to take the water glass He Pingyi handed her over.He raised his head and drank a few swigs, then put the water glass on his lap, and sat with his head bowed without saying a word.

After calming down, he felt that he should say something to He Pingyi, such as explaining his situation, such as telling him that he would definitely control himself and not do anything to hurt him.But at this moment, he seemed to have not fully recovered his ability to think. These thoughts flashed through his mind over and over again, but no one left them behind.So, after a long silence, Jing Can just kept her head in suspense, and said the only thing she still remembered firmly: "I lost my hat."

He wanted to act like a normal person, so he said this sentence in a calm tone as much as possible.However, for some reason, after the short words were over, the water in the glass began to vibrate unceasingly.

He Pingyi immediately realized what Jing Can was talking about.He recalled that bustling street, Jing Can couldn't help touching his hat when he was walking on the road, and kept asking him with a smile if it looked good.

One still and one moving, one dark and one bright, the contrast between the two pictures is too strong, as if all the unevenness and randomness of their short life are displayed in one go, forcing He Ping to feel distressed.He took the water glass away from Jing Can's tightly clenched hand, put it back on the cabinet, and then used one arm to pull the man into his arms.

"I'll take you to buy another one."

"No more." Hearing him say this, Jing Can raised her head and glanced at him with reddened eyes, "The boss said, there is only that one."

"Yes, we will go to her, she will be happy to make you another one." He Pingyi patted his head, and continued, "The trees in Qingyan Temple are all green now, greener than in winter." To see it, let's go again, shall we?"

Jing Can looked at He Pingyi quietly for a while, and moved her body when the soreness in her eyes became obvious again.He grabbed He Pingyi with both hands, and pressed his face against his chest.

He didn't close his eyes, just turned his face sideways, and with He Pingyi's heartbeat, he opened his eyes and looked at the increasingly blurred world in front of him.

Both of them were only wearing a pair of soft half-sleeves, Jing Can's back was slightly undulating by breathing, He Pingyi put his hand on it, and comforted the uneasy swollen back.

The water droplets did not know when they hung on the corners of the eyes, hung for a long time, and finally landed on the charcoal gray cotton cloth.Jing Can turned her head and buried her face, and the color of the charcoal gray became darker and lighter in the corner where no one could see.

After a while, Jing Can still shook her head.

"It's not that one anymore."

After waking up, Jing Can never fell asleep again, and He Pingyi lay in his arms for most of the night, chatting with him without saying a word.Neither of them had dinner, and when it was about three o'clock, He Pingyi rubbed his chin on Jing Can's head and asked him, "Are you hungry?"

"hungry."

"Then I'll make you something to eat."

He Pingyi put on and took off his shoes and got out of bed. He wanted to tell Jing Can to wait for him here.But when she turned around, she saw Jing Can sitting on the bed with her legs bent, looking at him intently, and changed her mind again.

He stretched out a hand to the man with blank eyes: "Go, do it with me."

Jing Can's reaction was still a little sluggish, he clearly heard He Pingyi's words, but it seemed like it took him a long time to interpret them, and looked at He Pingyi in a daze.

He Pingyi passed his hand forward again, and Jing Can finally seemed to react, and put his hand on his.

Because he was afraid of waking up Song Yinan and Jing Zaixing, He Pingyi kept his movements light.Jing Can followed him without saying a word, but when He Ping moved two steps, he followed him.He Pingyi put a bowl of egg custard out of the pot, hugged Jing Can sideways, and kissed him.

"What's wrong?" He Pingyi asked with a smile, "Are you afraid I'll lose it?"

Jing Can just shook her head at first, and stood beside him without saying a word. When the water in the pot started to boil, He Pingyi heard the person beside her say, "I'm afraid I'll lose it."

The egg custard was cooked quickly, because Jing Can's stomach was very uncomfortable when she first came into contact with the food because she hadn't eaten much in the past few days.He Pingyi saw that he was covering his stomach with his left hand all the time, so he said, "No hurry, eat slowly."

Jing Can scooped a large spoonful from the bowl and handed it to He Pingyi: "You eat some too."

The two of them ate this bowl of egg custard for 10 minutes. After eating, He Pingyi took the bowl into the sink and washed it with a small stream of water.This time Jing Can didn't follow him in, He Pingyi originally thought that Jing Can would sit at the dining table and wait for him, but when he got to the restaurant, his eyes didn't catch the person he wanted to see.

He Pingyi tilted his head and found Jing Can squatting in front of the refrigerator.

He Pingyi walked over, squatted beside Jing Can, and asked him, "What's wrong?"

Jing Can held a plastic bag in his hand, and because it was covered with ice, He Pingyi couldn't see what was inside.The refrigerator door was opened wide, and the cold air from the freezing layer kept rushing out, condensing into white water vapor.Jing Can held the thing with both hands, kept her head down, not knowing what she was thinking.

It still gets cold after squatting in front of the refrigerator for a long time, He Pingyi put one hand on Jing Can's knee that was almost touching the refrigerator compartment, and asked, "Is it cold? Do you want to get up first?"

Jing Can stared at He Pingyi's hand that was protecting him from the cold for a while, and when she looked up again her eyes were red.He handed the thing in his hand to He Pingyi, but He Pingyi was taken aback, then caught it.

When he touched the thing, He Pingyi had a guess in his heart. He opened the fresh-keeping bag outside, and sure enough, he saw a mango.

There is a small man wearing glasses drawn on the mango, and the words he wrote on it at the beginning, "One for each person."

He picked the mango, and saw that there was still a sealed plastic tube inside. Inside the plastic tube was the little green umbrella that Jing Can insisted on back then, and a small note.

Before him, Jing Can reached out and picked up the plastic tube.

"I used to think about it, if one day I really lose my mind and forget important people, what should I do?"

He Pingyi didn't know why Jing Can said this suddenly, but upon hearing this, he said in a deep voice, "No."

Jing Can squeezed the plastic tube and looked up at him.He tried to pull the corners of his mouth, but failed to present a smile, so he lowered his head again.

"Later I thought, the brain will fail, but the senses will not. The body's preferences should be the most primitive, so...even if one day I go crazy, I should still like to eat mangoes, and I still like the green ones I see. thing."

Jing Can squeezed hard with both hands, and the seal of the plastic tube cracked like breaking ice.The small note was drawn out of the plastic tube and unfolded between the fingers.

There are only three words on it, which are the names that Jing Can has called countless times.

The instant he saw it clearly, He Pingyi understood what Jing Can meant.

Write the person you like next to everything you like, and even in the worst times, he will definitely remember him.

Jing Can suddenly leaned over and hugged the man who was staring blankly at Mango.

The short sleeves have no effect on covering or blocking, He Pingyi can feel Jing Can's breath on his shoulders, unsteady and hot.This reminded him of that morning when there was still mist, when the boy with his head bowed gave him a mango, and he just teased him, and the boy blushed and gave him another one as well.

"He Pingyi, don't be afraid of me."

After Jing Can said this, he grabbed He Pingyi's clothes with his teeth, and he pulled up a small bulge in the cotton cloth, like an accident that everyone may encounter in a peaceful life.He suppressed himself, not wanting to let himself cry, and clenched his fists tightly where He Pingyi couldn't see, as if desperately trying to tighten something.

He Pingyi couldn't help it when he heard Jing Can's words, and the soreness he felt when he saw the mango just now rushed into this quiet room.In his memory, Jing Can has many appearances, the appearance of smiling gently in the corridor, the appearance of refusing to admit defeat on the rock climbing wall, the appearance of stubbornly verifying drifting and cornering on the racing track, and the appearance of Jing Can on the road to Qingyan Temple. The appearance of running forward like a bird, the appearance of shining eyes in the projection hall... He thought, either is good, but it must not be like the present, uneasy, fearful, and inferior.

His Jing Can should not be like this.

Jing Can was shaking, and the shaking was getting stronger and stronger.Even though it was early summer, he seemed to be wearing thin clothes and standing in a cold winter night full of heavy snow.

Tears rolled down silently, He Pingyi lowered his eyes, embraced Jing Can with one arm, and strangled him into his arms.

Jing Can gradually cried a lot, but He Pingyi's throat was choked, and there was no way to say words of comfort.At such a close distance, he seemed to be able to feel Jing Can's great pain, but he knew very well that what he felt was just the tip of the iceberg.He will never really know what kind of mood Jing Can used to freeze this mango into the refrigerator, and what kind of mood he wrote his name on the note, just like he still doesn't know his brother What a painful spiritual world before death.

He thought, if the pain that Jing Can is showing now is very painful, then what Jing Can really experienced should be [-] or [-].

But even this very painful pain made him cry, so how did Jing Can face it for so long?

He suddenly remembered Jing Can's eyes looking at him quietly by the kitchen window in this room.In fact, there was no emotion in his eyes at that time, no pain, no struggle, because after so many years, these gloomy emotions that grew up under the ruins have long been properly hidden by Jing Can.

If he doesn't tell, no one will know.

"Why would I be afraid of you?" Tears flowed down He Pingyi's side face and onto Jing Can's shoulder. He Pingyi turned his head and kissed the soft ear, "I love you."