Because I'm too afraid of pain, it's worth all the looks

There are several books that record about "Dazai Zhi". Ming Qiu originally thought that everyone is similar, but after a closer look, it seems that only Dazai Zhi is like this. At the same time, it also records Dazai Zhi's past.

But if you look at it from other "Osamu Dazai", you can roughly guess the future of Osamu Dazai in front of her.

Being followed by this person, I almost forgot that he is a suicide enthusiast, always pretending to be calm and joking, but inside there is a stronger despair than others.

His past is dark...

Osamu Dazai put down the book with the same name and surname as himself that Ming Qiu had just read in his hand, looked at Ming Qiu who was sitting opposite, and said, "Why does Qiu show that expression?"

Ming Qiu just stared at the book in his hand, and said, "Have you finished reading it too?"

"Hmm." Osamu Dazai seemed to have guessed what she was thinking, and said, "To be honest, I don't care as much about the past as Qiu imagined. After all, it has become a part of my body, and I want to remove and wash it. It's too late, it's better to leave them behind, anyway, it's different now."

Ming Qiu closed the book in his hand and said, "That's right..."

"Compared to my past, why don't you look at this." Osamu Dazai handed out the book in his hand, and said, "I think Qiu is also curious about himself."

Ming Qiu blinked, and asked with some doubts: "Isn't this a book related to you? Why did you let me read it..."

Osamu Dazai handed it to her and said, "If Qiu has seen it, he will know it."

"On a bright autumn day, she walked out of the house so bravely for the first time..."

The young man in a suit read the novel slowly, more seriously than anyone else. He was still wrapped in bandages, as if he had suffered a serious injury.

The young man asked: "Why do you put novels in the tavern?"

"Because this is written by a frequent guest who also wrote here, so I think it is very meaningful to put this novel here." The boss said: "Although it is about a girl, it is more It’s like writing about your own inner world.”

The young man closed the book, feeling a little bit emotional, and said: "Such a girl is too clumsy. Although readers love and love her more, I'm afraid it will attract criticism."

"Oda-kun treats this novel as his own child, that's why he wrote these words so tenderly." The boss wiped the water on the cup, and said, "I hate the dark too much, that's why I am like this." I yearn for the light, so that not only myself, but also the characters in my pen treat the world so tenderly. This is the first work of Oda-kun, even if there are imperfections, it is very meaningful to Oda-kun thing."

"Is that so..." The young man picked up the novel again, and said, "The store manager doesn't mind if I take a copy back to read, right? I always feel that this ending is still a bit unfinished."

"Of course I don't mind, please."

The young man hummed an unknown tune, and walked out of the tavern with the novel.

No one would have imagined that the young man would be Osamu Dazai, the youngest leader of Mafia at the port.

"leader."

Osamu Dazai turned his head, looked at the white-haired boy in a black jacket, and said with a smile, "Atsu."

"Mr. Dazai..."

Dazai Osamu looked at him very seriously today, and said with a smile, "Why did you appear here?"

Atsushi Nakajima said with some embarrassment: "Because Mr. Dazai often comes to this tavern, I am a little worried about your safety..."

Osamu Dazai looked at the novel in his hand and said, "It's not a big deal."

Atsushi Nakajima couldn't say anything more, so he fell into silence, but he accidentally saw the five characters "Oda Sakunosuke" on the spine of the book, which should be the author of the book.

The title of the book is called...

"Let's go back."

Atsushi Nakajima quickly recovered, and responded, "Yes!"

Today's weather is not good, Oda Sakunosuke hurried into the tavern and said, "It's still the same."

If the current job is busy, it is actually very easy. It does not need to be as hard as before, but if it is not busy - solving neighborhood conflicts, chatting with the elderly, taking care of the children... I used to often go to the pub for a drink. Fewer and fewer.

The boss brought him the "old style" and said with a smile, "Oda-kun, long time no see."

"Long time no see." Oda Sakunosuke responded, his eyes fell on the neatly arranged novels on the bar counter, and he said in surprise, "Did you buy it on purpose...?"

The boss explained with a smile: "Because the creation was completed here, I am also honored, so I specially bought a few copies for the guests to read."

"It's really appreciated..."

The store manager thought of something, smiled and said: "Today, a customer happened to come and browse through Oda-kun's works."

"Ok?"

"The other party should like Oda-kun's works very much, but he is not satisfied with the ending of Oda-kun."

Oda Sakunosuke was not surprised by this, and said: "The editor has also said about this, but I am still determined to write like this."

"This is a work like Utopia. I see that there seem to be some critical voices."

"A young girl strives to pursue the happiness of ordinary people. While helping others, she also reaps such happiness in the end. This is the original intention of this story." Oda Sakunosuke took a sip of his wine and said, "I don't want her to be so happy because of this. Broken, because the people outside the book cannot influence the people inside the book, but the people inside the book can change the people outside the book.”

"I see... Oda-kun really made up his mind."

Oda Sakunosuke smiled and said, "If such a child is born in this world, he will definitely be loved by everyone."

"Such a child is not suitable to be born in such a world." Osamu Dazai put down the book in his hand, and finally said so.

Born in such a filthy world, it looks like a child who will become unhappy.

Zhong Yuanzhong also glanced at him, and said, "You are still reading novels at this time, are you still a competent leader?"

Osamu Dazai smiled and said, "Even if I'm incompetent, I'm still the leader, Chuya."

Nakahara was also choked by his words, and could only make a displeased sound, then turned and left Dazai Osamu's room.

Osamu Dazai looked at the cover of the novel and said softly:

"Odasaku is not writing about himself, but about his inner desire, so it doesn't have the delicateness of a girl."

People often regret - "if only I had done this instead of that".

If there had been such a person in the past, it would not be what it is now.

Osamu Dazai sighed: "The people outside the book can interfere with the people inside the book, but the people inside the book can't save the people outside the book." His exposed right eye narrowed slightly, and said: "But... ...if there can be exceptions? After all, the world itself was created by 'books'."

Thus, a brand new life appeared in this world.

"It's called...Ming Qiu."

"Ming... Qiu... such a name is a bit strange, like a nickname or something."

"It's called that because it's a bright autumn." Dazai Osamu said with a smile, "Please Yin take care of her for a while."

The girl dressed as a secretary looked aside with some embarrassment, the child was dangling Dazai Osamu's coat, and then she said: "But this child is so small, it looks like he is only three or four years old...it can't be... ..."

Stolen?snatched?Have a special purpose?Trained since childhood and become an outstanding Mafia member in the future?

Osamu Dazai replied with a smile: "This is not my child, but... someone else's child."

"Yes, is that so..."

It always feels weirder.

Osamu Dazai suddenly emphasized: "But—don't let her have any contact with the outside world. It's best to confuse nationality, address, and time together. Don't let her know too much about this world."

Yin was a little puzzled, and asked cautiously, "Is it necessary to do this?"

"This child is pure and innocent." Osamu Dazai looked at the little girl with beautiful eyes twinkling with gentle eyes, and said, "The world she lives in should be purer than everyone else, as pure as glass. Only in this way can the world be born and give birth to the 'Ming Qiu'."

Although his words seem to have deep meaning, but for Gin, as long as he obeys Mr. Dazai, it is good, because Mr. Dazai is her benefactor, and without Mr. Dazai, she would not be where she is today.

The growth rate of this child seems to be much slower than that of ordinary people, and she is an extremely innocent little guy. Get up, raise her up in a way that the world can't understand, guard the child's growth in secret, and occasionally let her see the outside world.

Even though Osamu Dazai is no longer alive.

until that day.

Ming Qiu picked up the cake and said cheerfully: "Wow, I'm here! A mature adult has appeared! As expected of me!"

The cake was specially made for her, and Yin, who was already old, couldn't meet her again, so he asked someone to do it.

"Ming Qiu, you've grown up. I've already found a job for you. You can go to work tomorrow. Don't worry, it's just a simple job as a secretary. As long as you work hard, that's enough."

From the other end of the phone came her voice that was still very immature even after decades:

"Received! I will definitely work hard, and I will never disappoint my aunt's expectations!"

Yin looked at the suicide note left by the man, and said softly: "Mr. Dazai, the task has been completely completed, I believe she will see a better world for you."

——When that child becomes an adult, let her see the world, presumably that world has become better with everyone's efforts.

It is incredible that the leader of the port Mafia left such a heart-warming suicide note.

After that, Ming Qiu disappeared.