bad derailment

"I'll go to the bathroom."

"it is good."

Pressing my back against the closed door, I let out a foul breath and raised my hand to loosen the tie that was too tight, but it didn't relieve the astringent throat in the slightest.

I really don't want to pry into Gu Mingsheng's past, such behavior is despicable and shameful, but most of the time, the impulse is hard to restrain.

He only briefly mentioned it to me once when he was a teenager-he had no father, and the other party ran away without a trace before he was born.The world that a weak woman can support is too limited. He must be sensible earlier than other children and accept the criticism and rules of the adult world in order to exchange these for what seems to be a happy life today.

He got everything that many people envied, but he also lost something that he could never get back in his life.I often think that if Gu Mingsheng was born in a happy family, he must be living a proud and bright life now, instead of just like before, even his smile must be actuarial, fake and delicate.

He trapped himself in a narrow world, rejecting all external factors that tried to get close.I used to think it was a deliberate effort by him to make himself stand out from the crowd, but it was not until later that I realized that this was an instinctive defense he was born with.Maybe even I can't touch his whole sincerity hidden behind the armor.

I know it's not entirely his fault, but it doesn't stop the knot in my chest from becoming astringent.

The sign for the restroom turned right ahead, I rubbed my face, which was hot from the air conditioner, and walked up and down.Someone walked out of the box when I turned the corner, and I turned sideways subconsciously until the other party suddenly called out my name.

"Lin Yao?"

His voice was not loud, with some uncertainty, drifting into the ears along the empty corridor.I turned around and saw only an unfamiliar face.

"......You are?"

The man opened his eyes wide, stepped forward and patted his chest and said, "I'm He Jin! You don't remember me? He Jin from Class 6 of Senior Three."

In an instant, I regretted stepping out of the box just now.

It took me a few minutes to match the person in front of me with the blurred face in my memory. I stood still, trying to laugh but couldn't.Even though I knew it was just unreasonable anger, I still couldn't suppress the impetuousness in my heart. Seeing He Jin's embarrassment mixed with excitement, I smiled.

"What a coincidence, I met you here."

These few words seemed to have given He Jin permission, and he immediately laughed heartily without any worries.

"That's right, how could it be such a coincidence! If you haven't changed in the past few years, I wouldn't have dared to call you just now."

"You have changed so much that I almost didn't recognize it."

He Jin rubbed his head, and smiled sheepishly, "It's a little bit, Ren Han and the others say I'm fat, but I'm happy and fat, and it's all fed by my wife."

I pretended to be surprised and asked, "Are you married?"

"Yes, the wedding was just held in June this year."

As soon as he opened the chatter box, he had the urge to chat forever in the corridor.I was impatient in my heart, but it didn't show on my face. After he told the story of the six-year long-distance running for love, I finally mentioned that it was inconvenient to chat outside. He Jin slapped his head, both annoyed and enthusiastic , led me into his box.

...actually that's not what I meant.

But Jindu went in, and I couldn't say anything disappointing.There were four people sitting in the box, two men and two women.I greeted them cautiously, and several people took turns to introduce them, only to realize that they were all high school classmates.He Jin said that they have been in touch after graduation, and they like to come out to get together when they have nothing to do, and today is just in time.

"Come on, Lin Yao, I really didn't expect to meet you today, this fate can't be helped!"

A glass of wine was forced into my hand by He Jin, and I said awkwardly, "I don't drink very well."

He didn't give me a chance to refuse at all, he raised his head and gulped it down, "It's okay, as long as you're interested, let's go!"

He Jin was more enthusiastic than when he was in high school, so I had no choice but to touch the glass and drink it down.The scorching white wine burned my throat, and I couldn't help coughing. When I was in a panic, someone handed me a piece of paper. I said thank you, and after I wiped my mouth, I met the man's complicated eyes.

...Ren Han.

I have basically forgotten all about the people and events in high school, and now only Gu Mingsheng and Ren Han are the only ones I can remember.I endured my embarrassment and smiled at him, but unexpectedly he avoided his eyes as if he saw some scourge, and kept his face stiff and silent.

It hasn't changed after all these years, and he still likes to avoid me so much.

He Jin and the others had already had a round of drinking, and they were all a little tipsy.He pulled me and chattered non-stop. He said that he would gather all his high school classmates for a party, and then he talked about the embarrassing story of skipping class and going to an Internet cafe and being arrested. I tried to agree, but actually didn't listen.

I didn’t have many friends in high school, and I studied step by step in school every day. I was regarded as a good student by my teachers and a nerd by my classmates.He Jin and the others are the most active small group in the class, and they have a good relationship with everyone, which is completely opposite to me.

If we insist that we have any intersection, it is limited to a few group activities and brief contact when distributing homework. No matter how he recalls his lost youth, I can't get the slightest sympathy.

Listening to his eloquent long-winded speech, the two female classmates showed a look of surprise.I endured the pain and drank three glasses with He Jin, but Ren Han stretched out his hand to stop me on the fourth glass.

He frowned, but didn't look at me, "It's almost over. Sister Ting should say you when I go back smelling of alcohol."

I think this 'Sister Ting' should be He Jin's wife, and he put down his glass when he heard the name.Seeing that the timing was almost the same, I stood up unsteadily, "It's time for me to go back, my friend is still waiting."

He Jin could only nod, and held me with his tongue out, "Let's, let's add WeChat before leaving. We must come out and get together when we have time, Lin Yao."

I said yes with a smile on my face.

After walking a few steps, the stamina of the four glasses of wine also followed.I rubbed my brows and turned into the bathroom, feeling sick in my stomach.For a long time, I haven't drank such a strong liquor, and my whole body is sending out signs of discomfort.I leaned against the wall for three or four minutes before suppressing the discomfort.

After scooping up the water and washing his face, his head finally cleared up a lot.I shook my hand, and just as I was about to open the door to leave, I bumped into someone head-on.

I can't tell whether there are more surprises or more calmness, but the other party is Ren Han.Through the cold dimming of the bathroom, I could barely see that his expression was not in a good mood.

It's just that the drunkenness made me feel uncomfortable all over, and I didn't even have the heart to discern the deep meaning on his face.I reached out and pushed Ren Han's shoulder, but it didn't move.

"Give way, I'm going out."

"Lin Yao, do you remember me?"

He asked this question inexplicably, and I said in a good temper: "Of course I remember, you are Ren Han."

Although I have a poor memory, I wouldn't just forget someone's self-introduction in a blink of an eye.What's more, the not-so-good experience in high school made me forget that no one can forget him.

I felt that I clearly did not say anything wrong, but Ren Han's expression was even worse. The humiliation was mixed with forbearance and anger, which added a bit of embarrassment to this gentle face.Even though snowflakes had already started to fall in front of my eyes, I couldn't help but sigh with emotion from the bottom of my heart.

If he had been uglier, maybe I would not have chosen to confess to him back then.

Even if it was just a complete misunderstanding.

Ren Han took a deep breath and said heavily, "You know that's not what I meant."

"Then what do you mean?"

It was as if he had been silenced suddenly, without a sound.

I was blocked by him for four or five minutes for no reason, and my mood plummeted. I said in a bad tone: "Speak directly, I will leave if I have nothing to do."

"Lin Yao!"

Ren Han yelled as if instinctively.He grabbed my wrist, and then shook it away as if he had touched something dirty. I didn't want to waste time on him, so I pushed him away and strode away.

Unexpectedly, he pulled me again, and there was an inaudible tremor in his voice.

"You...are you married?"

Following his slit canthus, I looked at the silver ring on the ring finger. The body of the ring drew an arc of light under the lamp, rendering a trace of inexplicable holiness.I quickly withdrew my hand, "Yes, I'm married, and my son is almost three months old, waiting to be called Dad."

After I finished speaking rather harshly, I watched Ren Han tremble as if his whole body was struck by a lightning bolt.His aura languished in an instant, and he stared at me hesitantly and confusedly, as if I was his sworn enemy, trying to force a hole in his body.

"How can you marry a woman?" he murmured, "how can you marry a woman?"

I asked impatiently: "How is it impossible?"

"Have you forgotten what you once said to me? You...you obviously..." Ren Han took a deep breath, and looked at me with deep hatred, "Your behavior is simply a mistake."

His eyes were so complicated that I couldn't describe them, angry, puzzled, confused, disgusted, and there was a sense of loss that I couldn't understand.

But fortunately, at least he didn't use 'disgusting' and 'abnormal' to describe me anymore, and his vocabulary has grown somewhat over the past few years.

"Ren Han, you also know that was once," I said calmly, without the slightest turmoil in my mood because of his words, "It's normal for teenagers to make mistakes, not to mention that I didn't do anything devastating. The thing, at most, is to say a few words and make you sick for a while, shouldn't it be a crime to die? I don't know what you are worrying about, but I need to remind you that all insults All the sexual words came out of your mouth, and I didn't refute a single word, do you need me to recall it for you?"

My voice was very cold, and my expression must not be much better.

In fact, it's quite boring to tear the skin apart like this. When I recognized Ren Han in the box, I had no other emotions except surprise.After so many years, everyone is no longer an ignorant child. I even gave him enough face to smile at him. Unfortunately, he not only didn't appreciate it, but also blocked him in the bathroom, questioning my sexuality from the highest point of morality just like back then. Orientation is really annoying and annoying.