1987, I didn't know I would meet you

Time flies, and college life is about to end in a flash.I have been very busy recently, the thesis is still a small problem, the most tangled thing is what to do after graduation.

"I'm about to graduate, and I always feel that the days go by so fast..."

I was lying on the big white bed in the hotel, watching Yang Zhenyu leaning against the head of the bed, he was smoking a cigarette leisurely, his eyes were empty and his expression was lazy.

"By the way, Ma Kun was still asking me what I plan to do after graduation two days ago... What about you?"

"Plan? My dad also mentioned this to me. He must mean that he wants me to inherit the family business."

"What about you?" I frowned, got up and looked into his eyes and asked.

But he didn't answer, just closed his eyes and shook his head wearily, and put out the cigarette butt in his hand into the ashtray on the bedside table.

I know it well, and I feel a little sad.Separation is inevitable. After graduation, we have chosen different paths, and we are destined to walk with our backs.But the greed, the greed lurking in my body, made me want to keep Yang Zhenyu close to me all the time, even if he lied to me that I would like to be with you forever, even if he lied to me, I would still be happy.

Looking at the ceiling in disbelief, I feel like crying, my heart is cold.

The quilt beside me moved, but I didn't look at it.I didn't want to see the rustling sound of Yang Zhenyu getting dressed, so I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

"I still have something to do here, so let's go first. You should go back to school early." After that, he took the coat on the back of the chair, closed the door and left without looking back.

The room suddenly became deathly silent. I deliberately relaxed my breathing and pricked up my ears to listen.After a long while, he suddenly sat up and breathed heavily, his blushing face was covered with tears.

I miss him, the more he has such an unclear attitude, the more I miss him.How much I want to go back to that winter vacation, when we hugged and slept together to keep each other warm, at least his palms were warm at that time.And now... I covered my face and sobbed softly.I really don't know if Yang Zhenyu still has me in his heart.

Time is so cruel, the more you want it to slow down, the faster it will go.A moment of stupefaction, a period of dormancy, the days that people want to cherish day by day go so fast.

I was extremely anxious, and even asked other people to ask Yang Zhenyu's thoughts, but the answers they gave me were almost the same.

The thing that frightened me the most finally happened.

In the past few days, Yang Zhenyu has been too busy to see anyone, and I can't find him no matter what.I want to ask, where are you going after graduation?Even if we are not together, leave a contact information.The address is also good, I can write to you when I miss you.

But I couldn't find him.I went crazy looking for the places where he frequented, room by room, floor to floor, I was so anxious that I almost burst into tears.

Yang Zhenyu, did you tell me in another way that it is impossible for us to be together again, taking this opportunity, we will go our separate ways?

What an asshole!Yang Zhenyu, you bastard!I don't agree, I don't want to separate...I still love you, even if you don't love me anymore...

On the day of graduation, he who had been missing for a long time still did not appear.It was so weird that no one knew where he went or what he did.It's just that his family sent someone to help him ask for leave, and his family also came to pick up his graduation certificate.Even though I was terribly afraid, I still stepped forward to inquire in fear, but the man just gave me a cold look, but said he didn't know!

uh...don't know...

In an instant, my body seemed to have fallen into a cave of ten thousand layers of ice, and my heart felt cold.It turned out that this was the answer. I was so stupid that I didn't want to believe it. I searched desperately for so long, just to hear him tell me in person.Perhaps, he has long been impatient with me.It's just a sense of novelty, just think about it, what kind of future can the two men have, let alone Yang Zhenyu who likes women.At that time, I actually believed his nonsense just like that, only when he really liked me.

Maybe he would say: "Lin Zhiqing, three years with you is enough."

I waited at school until the sun set, and reluctantly said goodbye to my friend who had been with me for four years.

Dim light came in from the window, and the empty dormitory became very large, and every sentence echoed.I squinted my eyes and sat on the plank bed motionless looking at the sky, my ears carefully capturing every sound.Yang Zhenyu’s belongings on the upper bunk haven’t been moved yet, but every day I fold his quilts neatly, clean his bed, and then mess up the quilts, stacking them casually, just as ugly as he rolled them.I'm waiting for the possibility of him coming, I just want to see him for the last time, even if we break up, I don't want to hide from me, I'm not the kind of person who stalks me!

Touching the corners of his eyes, his eyes were sore for a while.I didn't sleep all night last night, no wonder my eyes were bloodshot.I rubbed my eyes, the pain became more and more painful, and finally I couldn't help sobbing.

I have always felt that crying is shameful since I was a child. After all, men bleed but do not shed tears.But I couldn't control myself, the tears were like a faucet that was turned on, and they couldn't stop flowing down, hitting the clothes one by one, leaving water stains.I hurriedly raised my sleeves to wipe, but I wiped more and more. In the end, I could only hug my arms and dare not take them off, because I could feel the wetness on the sleeves.

That day, I really waited until very late, and when the auntie in the dormitory was cleaning and was about to leave, I hadn't left yet.When it was night, I simply pushed the things, turned around and climbed onto Yang Zhenyu's bed.Without a quilt, I curled up pitifully on the bed, shivering from the cold, tears streaming down my face.I hold back quickly, he will find out, if I leave a mark on the bed, I will be found out.

I waited for two days, and finally when the train was about to leave, I dragged my luggage out of the school gate.At the school gate, I was stunned for a while, and I couldn't help guessing in my heart.Waiting for 1 minute, maybe he came by coincidence... Maybe just as soon as I walked on the front foot, he arrived on the back foot, and I can't go...

I really want to see him, take a look at him, whether it's the back view from a distance, or the leaving figure, let me take another look!

Until the end, he still didn't show up again.And I could only smile wryly, and with longing for him, I set foot on the train to Suzhou.