typhoon transit

The two tickets in his pocket were already wet with sweat.I blow out my birthday candles and put my hands together.The moment I closed my eyes, I saw time passing in front of me, and those vague days flew away in an instant as if they had never happened.I didn't make a wish, I just opened my eyes and felt like I had witnessed the end of a great feast.

I looked at the map of China in my room and measured the distance between the various plates with my fingers, as if I could reach anywhere I wanted if I just took one step.I understand the weight of the price. It symbolizes a responsibility, a responsibility that you must bear whether you want it or not.

If there was any way for me to escape this responsibility, I think I would do so immediately.

That afternoon, I bought two tickets at the ticket office by accident.I stared at them, and they seemed to turn into water and flow away from my fingers.My head is in a mess, staring at the yellowed wall of the ticket booth, several electric fans are blowing wearily on the top, the heat wave is surging, I am sweating profusely in this terrible summer, and my clothes have been torn It was wet, and there was a lot of traffic outside, and the reflection of the glass made my eyes hurt.All I could hear was the wind, and they were so quiet at the moment.

On the way home, I saw Mr. Liang. He greeted me warmly and insisted on buying me popsicles.We ate ice together on the side of the road, and we didn’t say anything until after we left, he wiped the sweat off his cheeks with his sleeve, I looked at his back, and I suddenly had feelings for him, as if We have known each other for a long time, and this will be our last goodbye.

I also met A Jiang, who was walking side by side with Xiao Sang, and I waved to them.Ajiang told me about her plan to go to Harbin next summer vacation, and she told me that it was very good there, and she would come to see me.

I even saw Chen Yi at the entrance of the cinema, she was wearing a yellow skirt, and she was watching the movie schedule close to the cinema.I didn't call her. In fact, I couldn't confirm that it was her at all. I just saw her back from a distance.

I just brushed past these people, some we got together and talked, told some trivial lies and jokes, while some we just watched from afar and hurried past.I stood on the high steps at the entrance of the alley and looked at this small town. I suddenly felt that it was so dazzling and unforgettable. Everyone on the street seemed to be related to me. It has never been heavier than this moment. I will understand everyone's past and try to forgive everyone's sins. I don't think anyone's love can be stronger than this feeling. For the first time, I feel that my whole body has been washed clean , as if it first came to the world.

When I opened the door, my father was still sitting in front of the TV and watching the news. The smoke at his fingertips had almost burned to the end, and the smoke was gradually thinning. The light from the TV shone on his face. I suddenly felt his The back is very lonely.

He heard my door open and turned to look at me.

"Xu Jinghe." He called me, "Come here."

I think I haven't looked at my father like this for a long time, without any prejudice or hatred, just staring purely.He was so thin, and the eyes behind the glasses were bloodshot.But he is not as old as I think, I even think he is still very young, as if his time is far from over.His face should have terrified me, but at this moment I was calm.I looked at the wall clock behind him, counting the rotation of the second hand, I was waiting for something to happen.

"Xu Jinghe, there are some things I have to tell you."

I nodded and smiled at him.I don't know if he can clearly see the sadness behind this smile. At that moment, I finally saw my love for my father. That kind of love is also desperate. I think no matter how much he hurts me, I will still love him so much. he.

"You're going to a faraway place. Dad can't do everything. I can't change that."

"I don't know what you want. I really don't know. I feel guilty that I don't know my daughter so well. But I hope you can forgive Dad. Everything Dad did was just to make you leave in the future." We're closer."

I used to regard leaving home as a symbol of growing up, and regard the long distance as a badge of honor, which was taught by Chang Qiao in the past.But now I no longer regard everything about Chang Qiao as the truth. On the contrary, they are more like a lie.So my father is asking me for forgiveness now, why should he say, I will forgive him anyway.

"Anyway..." My dad paused.

I was waiting for his next words, but he stood there with his mouth open, as if he couldn't find another suitable word.I think that's enough, those nasty words just now should have exhausted all he has.

But he seemed to have to say something, I could see the twitch of his eyes.I saw a kind of hard struggle on his face, that kind of expression I have never seen on his face, I always thought that my father would do everything calmly, but at this moment he seemed to be attacked by something Something knocked out.If I'm not mistaken, I think this is a gesture of retention, and he already knows everything.

I suddenly felt that maybe he loved me, just as I loved him, loved me.

"Anyway, your home is here."

That night, the wind and the storm, I began to pray, stop sailing, stop sailing, in that case, many things I don't want to face can be delayed a little longer.

I didn't bring an umbrella, and I shuffled like a walking dead under the eaves to the pier.I passed the canteen, passed the barbecue shop, passed the salt factory, and then passed a bright tunnel. I will arrive soon, and I bid farewell to them one by one.

I have nothing, I have nothing but two tickets in my pocket.They were wet with my sweat, and even the mimeographed writing on them was blurred.I feel like they are the only things I have left in this world.Without Changqiao, I never had Changqiao.

The rain wet the right side of my body, I stopped and watched the raindrops fall from the sky, I looked up to find their source, only the looming black cloud, almost hanging over the roof, always To collapse down.

When I saw Chang Qiao again, she was holding an umbrella and her back was facing the lights of the waiting hall.Everything around me was dark, and as I walked towards her step by step, her face gradually became clear.I stopped, I couldn't go any further, as long as I took another step forward, I couldn't restrain my urge to walk with her anymore.

"You're here, Jing He."

She smiled at me, so beautiful, like every one of her smiles.I still use those vulgar words to describe Chang Qiao, so warm and moving.

"Why don't you bring an umbrella? I'm all wet." She pulled me under her umbrella and reached out to touch my drenched hair.I let her do whatever she wanted with me, without saying a word or doing anything.

She looked down at me, and I felt her palm touching my cheek. It was strange, my sight was clear, and I didn't feel any tears falling, but I heard her say, Jing He, why are you crying?

Don't cry, Xu Jinghe.I think something in my heart is broken. I tried my best, I sacrificed everything, but I couldn't save my heart.I thought of Chen Yi again, the contempt and hatred I had for her were gone at this moment, I suddenly understood that everything she did was so forgivable and just as it should be.Turns out we are all the same people.

But I want to do something different. I think I haven't done anything cool enough or memorable enough in my life so far.We are all so small, and soon after that, no one will remember us, and those stories will become as vague as ancient legends. This long summer is so far away that I can stretch it far, It can no longer be touched.But I love her so much that I think that everything I once held dear, that was so important, no longer matters.

Chang Qiao took my hand and walked into the waiting hall. The ticket inspector hung his head, as if he hadn't woken up yet.The entire hall was empty, the scattered passers-by were negligible, the darkness was out of reach, and there were only two of us left in the whole world.

I gave her the ticket, and I don't think she would ever know that I had another ticket in my pocket.I don't think she would know that if she could just look at me when I kissed her, I would go with her.

But she did nothing.

"That's it, Jing He."

I let go of her lips and she was still smiling.Her lips were cold, and at the moment the coldness ran through my whole body.I think she has given me the answer.I see.

When she turned to leave, I was still clutching the ticket in my pocket, but I would never take it out again.My father loves me, my brother loves me, I love them too, and I love this town too. Thinking about it this way, love is really simple, but in this case, why is Chang Qiao still unwilling to love me?

This question is too complicated, I can only remain puzzled, and I can no longer find the answer in the few seconds I watched her back.I could only look at her, staring at her for a long time, her figure gradually became smaller, blurred and unfamiliar, I suddenly felt that the person was not Chang Qiao, she would not just leave me alone.But who is she?After so many years, there is no way to figure it out.

Maybe we will never meet again, I think, what a bland farewell.Her figure climbed up the long ship ladder and escaped into the endless darkness.The big ship was lighted, hovering over the sea like a lighthouse.It was still raining, and everything in my sight melted into the rain.

When I turned to leave, I lowered my head, only her umbrella remained in my hand.