Sir, I'm not good

"I'm not in a hurry to die, so you don't have to stare at me like that." Shu Xian said to Gu Yinian in a helpless voice.

"I'm fine, you go to bed first."

"...Is this a question of whether you are okay? You stare at me, and I can't sleep."

Shu Xian looked at the man sitting beside his hospital bed with deep and burning eyes, feeling a little headache.

Looking at Gu Yinian like this, it seems that he is determined to watch him sleep, and will not leave easily.

In fact, Gu Yinian's eyes are beautiful, cold and lustful, a casual glance can seduce people's hearts.

This is how Shu Xian fell into it three years ago.

But now that the lights are turned off in the ward, Gu Yinian's eyes are shining by the bed, staring at him, somewhat horrified.

"I promise, I won't die today, you go, the money for medical treatment will be transferred to your account when I go back."

"What about tomorrow?"

"Let's talk about tomorrow's matter tomorrow." Shu Xian stopped looking at Gu Yinian and murmured while staring at the ceiling.

He doesn't like to lie, he doesn't want to leave to lie to Gu Yinian, saying that he doesn't want to die.

Who can say what will happen tomorrow?

Looking at Shu Xian's indifferent eyes, Gu Yinian felt a huge sense of powerlessness.

He lowered his head, his cold eyes were full of sorrow now: "Perhaps it will be better for you if Xiang Qing's matter doesn't end so smoothly."

When Shu Xian heard Gu Yinian's words, he couldn't help turning his head to look at him, with a trace of surprise in his eyes.

After being stunned for two seconds, Shu Xian smiled at Gu Yinian: "You understand me."

When Xiang Qing's matter was over, Jian Wan and Yu Jingcheng's first reaction was to drink and celebrate, they thought it was a good thing.

Unexpectedly, it was Gu Yinian who realized that the end of Xiang Qing's incident was also the end of his reason for living in a sense.

He had no intention of living anymore.

After the car accident, when he just woke up, he opened the window while Li Su and the others were leaving.

The wind that day was very refreshing, blowing people through, he opened his arms facing the sky outside the window, and when he was about to jump down, Gu Yinian pushed the door open and walked in.

At that time, he pretended to be looking at the scenery and hid it from Gu Yinian.

But in fact, he really wanted to die at that time.

Later, he discovered the conspiracy behind the car accident, discovered the real cause of Bai Yu's death, and tentatively found a reason to live: to avenge Bai Yu.

By now, Xu Tianzhe and Xiang Qing had their endings, and he also wanted to have an ending.

Bai Yu has filled his life for more than 20 years. Except for Bai Yu, anyone who appears in his life is a kind of filth.

He thought that if someone wrote his epitaph, every word and every word must be related to Bai Yu, other than that, he didn't want to have any contact with anyone else.

"Gu Yinian, I want to divorce you, I want to meet Bai Yu alone."

"But you can't see Bai Yu anymore. When a person dies, he completely disappears."

Gu Yinian said it word by word, he was speaking to Shu Xian, and it seemed to be saying to himself: "If you lose it, you will lose it forever."

"Sir, I know, but I can't help it."

Shu Xian's face was calm, and his tone was long and soft. He didn't have the usual sarcasm when he faced Gu Yinian. He seemed to be talking to an ordinary friend, but also like talking to another self.

I can't give up my attachment to Bai Yu, just like you can't give up on me.

So I can only die perseveringly, and you can only keep me perseveringly.Dropping stones, sawing wood with a rope, touching white blades, and shooting arrows, never turning back, never turning back.

"...Shu Xian, if you die, I will regret it for the rest of my life." Regret that I didn't love you earlier, regret that I didn't cherish you.

"Who cares about your regrets? Sir, why don't I live a little longer and let you love me more deeply, so that when I die, I may be able to take you away."

Shu Xian said it easily, and Gu Yinian also understood that Shu Xian was joking, but he couldn't help being sad after all.

He could understand that Shu Xian hated him, but he couldn't control his heart throbbing.

Seeing Gu Yinian's expression turned bitter, Shu Xian didn't feel refreshed either. He couldn't get happiness from Gu Yinian's pain, which was different from Xiang Qing.

He was very happy to see Xiang Qing yelling at him crazily, but only being restrained by the guards.

And he had given up on Gu Yinian for a while.

So, seeing Gu Yinian's changing expression, Shu Xian just felt bored, and his tone became a lot more indifferent:

"That's it, Gu Yinian, you go, don't tell Jian Wan and my parents about my hospitalization."

"What if I say so?" Gu Yinian raised his head, wanting to fight for something.

He wanted Shu Xian to live, no matter what threats he used.

But Shu Xian didn't take this as a big deal at all, and said with a frank smile, "Let's just say it, at most it's more troublesome to live, and more troublesome to die."

Gu Yinian guessed Shu Xian's attitude, he was not disappointed, but just felt powerless.

It's as if this person is still talking well in front of his eyes, but every tomorrow may completely leave him.

"Shu Xian..."

Gu Yinian called Shu Xian's name, and Shu Xian turned his head to look at him without caring.

But Gu Yinian couldn't say anything.

When Shu Xian woke up the next day, he saw Dr. Sun standing beside his bed, still feeling a little dazed.

After recalling it for a while, he finally remembered that Gu Yinian was persuaded to leave by him last night.

"Doctor Sun."

"Two things." Seeing that the person finally woke up, Dr. Sun quickly said, "The first thing is that your broken body can't stand the inhibitors now. If you don't want to be marked in the estrous period in the future, come to me." Infusion."

"Ok."

Shu Xian agreed quickly, with a good attitude and a sincere look, which satisfied Dr. Sun very much.

But in fact, the reason why Shu Xian agreed so quickly was because it didn't matter to him anymore, and he didn't even want to live until the next emotional period.

Dr. Sun didn't know anything else, so he pushed his glasses in relief, and looked a little more serious: "Second thing, Lao Bai wants to see you."

Lao Bai?

Shu Xian was stunned for a moment, then realized that what Dr. Sun was talking about should be Bai Yu's grandfather, Bai Jianguo.

After all, Dr. Sun was also appointed by Bai Yu at the beginning, and he must have some connection with the Bai family.

"Is there anything grandpa wants from me?" Shu Xian asked hesitantly.

"He called me and said he wanted to play chess with you."

When Dr. Sun talked about Bai Jianguo, a look of disgust appeared on his face.

"But I think his old fox is definitely not innocent. If you go, be careful."

Shu Xian nodded.

Although Bai Jianguo treated him very well, he was indeed an old fox, and it was definitely impossible to just play chess with him.

"Can I choose not to go?" Shu Xian asked after thinking for a while.

He always felt that at this juncture, it would not be a good thing for Bai Jianguo to seek him out, and it was better not to be tough if he could escape.

"I don't actually suggest you go with your tattered body."

"but?"

"But Xiao Chen is already waiting for you outside." Dr. Sun curled his lips and said in an indignant tone, as if Bai Jianguo threatened Shu Xian.

Shu Xian didn't have much reaction to this.

The little Chen that Dr. Sun spoke of should be Uncle Chen.

He said that he wanted to invite him to play chess, but he directly sent Uncle Chen to pick him up. This vigorous and resolute style fit Grandpa Bai's character very well.

If you can't avoid it, then you have to go.

When Shu Xian changed his clothes and walked out of the ward, he saw Uncle Chen waiting for him with a kind face.

"Hello, Uncle Chen."

"It's good to be idle, I haven't seen you for more than a month, and I've lost a lot of weight." Uncle Chen came over and patted Shu Xian on the shoulder, with a hint of distress in his eyes.

He hasn't seen Shu Xian since the car accident. Shu Xian has experienced too much in the past month or so.

"Isn't it good to lose weight? It conforms to the mainstream aesthetics." Shu Xian replied with a smile, without any strange expression on his face.

"You're not fat at all! When you go home this time, the kitchen cooks all your favorite food, so eat more!"

"Really? I'm so greedy for Chef Li's Maoxuewang!"

"Old Li bought Maodu yesterday, and started preparing it early in the morning, just remembering that you love Maoxuewang!"

The two walked out of the hospital while chatting, and the scene was very harmonious.

Just looking at Shu Xian's playful and lively performance, it is completely impossible to imagine that the underside of his sleeves is covered with terrible scratches.

Old Chen was a little skeptical, Shu Xian looked quite normal, did the old man think too much?

But he is just a man of affairs. There is no need to question what the old man says and what he does.

So the two got into the car and drove on the road leading to the old house of the Bai family.

The moment he got into the car, Shu Xian realized that the car Uncle Chen came to pick him up today was not the one that went to the hospital that day.

It was probably arranged by Grandpa Bai, afraid that he would miss someone when he saw the car, so he asked Uncle Chen to change the car.

Moreover, a coat was left for him in the car, probably because he learned about his fever from Dr. Sun, for fear that he would feel cold.

"How do you feel leisurely? Do you still have a fever?"

After driving for half an hour, Uncle Chen turned his head and asked while waiting for the red light, but suddenly saw Shu Xian's indifferent and sad eyes.

"I've lost the fluid all night, so I definitely can't burn it again." Hearing this, Shu Xian raised his head and put on a gentle smile.

Old Chen was stunned for a moment, and was suspicious for a moment. Did he misread the indifferent Shu Xian just now?

At this moment, Bai Jianguo was sitting in a rattan rocking chair in the small garden, covered with a blanket, looking at the withered flowers and trees in front of him.

The formerly old and well-behaved old man of the Bai family is now full of sadness.

After a long time, a servant came quietly behind him and said respectfully, "Master, Master Shu Xian has arrived."

The old man didn't speak, and still sat quietly, as if he didn't hear it.

Just when the waiter was about to say it again, the old man let out a long sigh, and the vicissitudes of 80 years were dispersed in this sigh.

"Poor children, they are all bitter children." Bai Jianguo murmured, stood up with support on the handrail, turned around slowly, and said as he walked, "But no matter how hard it is, you have to live..."