Songmian

I am no longer alone talking to myself.

After Zhou Mian woke up once, he was able to stay awake for an hour every day. At this time, I would broadcast the news of the day to him in an unknown dialect. I felt very nervous, but he laughed.

Zhou Mian, you have such an ugly smile.

After a few more days, he was much better, and he was able to stay awake for half a day, no longer being assisted by a ventilator, and I would tell him something about the past.Probably because too much time has passed, and I can't remember clearly, so I can only talk about it and make it up.I have good eloquence and superb acting skills, he was amused by me and laughed.

Zhou Mian, you look so pretty when you smile.

Before the third batch of oranges goes bad, you finally eat them.You can also taste a few mouthfuls of the dishes I cook. I know you are happy to eat, but you still have to pretend that I can make progress in case you will be struck by lightning.

When I go to the vegetable market now, my grandpa and aunt give me cheap prices, and even give me some other food, and ask me if the kid at home has a good appetite.

You can also be considered a child, an adult with a small temper.

Gu Yuan's boyfriend Xia Guang came to see him every once in a while. I don't know why Gu Yuan was admitted to the hospital.His boyfriend is so bad, they are all famous and capable actors, it's fine if he doesn't come to see Gu Yuan every day, and he doesn't find someone to take care of him, and let him lie on the hospital bed alone.

Tch, a man who only has money but doesn't take care of his partner.

Fortunately, Zhou Mian will strike up a conversation with him.The two of them were like old friends, chatting about everything.

At night, after Zhou Mian fell asleep, I wiped his face with a soaked towel, imitating what I saw in my dream, parted his bangs and left a light kiss on his forehead.I didn't want to make a fuss, he didn't sleep well, so he sat on the ground against the wall.

In the past two days, I have been thinking about when your two days will be, and how I should greet that "surprise", but after quietly looking at your sleeping face, I think this is actually not bad.

I quietly moved my position, leaned on the edge of the bed, hooked your little finger on your shoulders, supported my head with my hand, and told you at night what I dared not say to you these two days.

I babbled on for more than half an hour by myself, my legs felt a little numb, so I withdrew my hands and sat down on the ground again.

"I love you, from beginning to end."

The only answer to me is your breathing.

Gu Yuan closed his self-made ugly curtain again, and I couldn't touch him for a few days, I could only chat with him through a layer of cloth, and occasionally I could hear his swishing sound .

What are you doing behind the curtain?Mysterious.

I swear, I didn't mean to spy on people.

Because I left my wallet on the cabinet, I took a turn to go back to pay the bill, just in time for Gu Yuan to come out.

"you----"

Gu Yuan's hair was gone, and he shaved his head bald.Seeing me, he was a little embarrassed, touched his ears and took two steps back to let me in.

I closed the door and took my wallet. No one spoke in the room for a while, so I tacitly agreed that he didn't want to mention it.As soon as he walked to the door, Gu Yuan spoke.

"I'm going to have surgery."

I didn't speak.

"Brain cancer, I'm going to have surgery soon." Gu Yuan said flatly with his back to me.

I didn't know how to comfort him, so I could only look at him quietly.There were nurses urging him outside the door, but he didn't move.

"I don't know how to face Xia Guang. I look pretty miserable." He laughed at himself, "He can't sign for domestic surgery. I called my family to come over to sign it two days ago. He kept sending me messages, saying he wanted to come and see me, but I lied to him that someone here was taking care of me."

"I'm delaying him. Carrying the label of homosexuality is equivalent to cutting off the future. So I didn't even call him today. He is normal and should have a better future." Gu Yuan finally turned around. Come on, I saw tears in his eyes, and his whole body was shaking.He wiped away his tears, pulled out an ugly smile, took a few steps forward, and said that he was going to have an operation.

I hugged him and told him that the operation would be successful and that you will have a better future together.

Gu Yuan hugged me back and said: Good friend, you will do it.

Zhou Mian woke up and saw that the bed next door was empty, she frowned and asked me where is Gu Yuan?I don't think it's necessary to lie to him. After getting along for a while, everyone has feelings, so I told him the truth.

After Zhou Mian finished listening, he wished Gu Yuan a successful operation, and asked, "What about Xia Guang? It's not fair."

I feel so too.As a lover, you don't even have the right to know that the other half has the right to undergo major surgery, which is really unfair.

Zhou Mian and I didn't close our eyes for a long time because we were worried about our neighbors.

"Don't let anything happen." I muttered.

There was a sudden commotion outside the door, with screams, cries, and reminders from nurses and doctors.I had some bad premonition in my heart, so I took Zhou Mian out to have a look.

The door of the operating room at the end of the corridor is a slightly empty place.A man in gorgeous clothes was kneeling on the ground. The doctor next to him shook his head and handed him a piece of paper.I pulled Zhou Mian to avoid the crowd and walked over quickly.When I walked in, I realized that the man was Xia Guang——he must have just rushed over for something, his forehead was covered with sweat, and he looked very messy.

I realized that my premonition was true, so I stopped Zhou Mian and prevented him from moving forward.

"what happened?"

I covered his eyes to keep him from looking.Amid the loud vocals, Zhou Mian caught a few words, "pity", "death", and "gay".He gasped, and tears fell into my palms.I was also a little uncomfortable, and I leaned my head on his shoulder and sobbed.

How can there be so much injustice in the world?

Death is all too common.It deprives people of the right to live, makes people who love each other lose each other, and breaks up a perfect family, but we can't change it; it squeezes people, and the few years that are already there can see people's hearts clearly and change their lives. .

Xia Guang probably knew about it early on.The wedding was a sensation all over the world, and the photos recorded their happy moments. Everyone knew in an instant that this famous actor had a lover of the same gender, but no one except us knew his name. .

Gu Yuan, he is actually a person surrounded by love.

I remembered that after being told the truth in the afternoon, I told Gu Yuan that he would have a better future with Xia Guang, and Gu Yuan’s reply was that you would, or not.

He had predicted the result early in the morning.

I haven't been so tired from crying in a long time.Essentially speaking, Gu Yuan and we were just strangers chatting, we didn't exchange any contact information, but we regarded each other as friends.

The date of burial was chosen three days later.

The city, which had been gloomy for several days, finally cleared up.The lily next to the hospital, which has not reached flowering period, bloomed ahead of schedule, and the birds on the branches did not chirp, as if aware of the heavy atmosphere.

At the end of the complicated process, Zhou Mian and I brought bouquets of flowers to worship Gu Yuan.Zhou Mian had a lot to say to him, rambling on and on for a long time.

He finished everything I wanted to say. After thinking for a long time, I said what I wanted to say a few days ago: "Gu Yuan, have a good time."

On the way back, Zhou Mian asked me inarticulately with sugar in his mouth, "Have you looked around?"

I turned my head to look at the kidney watch, but there was nothing, and asked strangely, "What?"

"Next to Gu Yuan's cemetery."

"No, what's the matter?" I never observe things that have nothing to do with me, and asked.

Zhou Mian closed his eyes, chewed the candy and said, "The seat next to it is empty."

"It's normal. If no one buys it, it is of course empty."

Zhou Mian glanced at me, like looking at a fool, and said, "Xia Guang bought it. The large cemetery behind is full, only these two are next to each other. Although it is empty, there is a bouquet of lilies." Flower, engraved on it: Husband of Gu Yuan."

I blinked, and the only remaining prejudiced thoughts about Xia Guang were emptied in my mind.

I've only been to one funeral, but it feels like I've been to four.