Xu Kaici's hair is green or not

Xu Kaici lay quietly on the hospital bed, looking at Cheng Hangyi without any emotion.His curled fingers were forcibly broken apart, and blood oxygen clips were clamped on them. Due to the high muscle tension, his hands would occasionally beat irregularly, as if he wanted to raise his hand to hold Cheng Hang. one hand.

But as soon as Cheng Hang knew that Xu Kaici no longer had the heart to hold his hand.

Shake it, rub it, don't even think about it.

I can't, and I don't want to.

The rescue was timely, so he didn't suffocate for too long, but Xu Kaici's cardiopulmonary function was already poor, and he needed to wear an oxygen mask quietly for this meeting.

Through the white steam exhaled by Xu Kaici in the oxygen mask, Cheng Hangyi could clearly see Xu Kaici's slow breathing.Just wearing it for a while, his face will definitely be reddened.

Speaking of which, this was the first time Cheng Hangyi saw Xu Kaici so weak, and also the first time he saw Xu Kaici enter the emergency room with his own eyes, and was pushed out with a pale face.

Just like this, Cheng Hang was suffocated and frightened, he didn't dare to think about how painful and dangerous it must have been when Xu Kaici was pushed down from downstairs three years ago.

No one will give him an answer anymore. I asked Xu Kaici before, and Xu Kaici could still laugh out loud at that meeting, and he could still joke: "How can it feel? My neck is broken and it won't hurt."

If you ask again later, Xu Kaici will smile impatiently and say: "Don't ask, I really don't remember, what do you remember when I was stunned after taking anesthesia? When I wake up, you will be in front of me. It seems like you are here." It's not too painful."

Cheng Hang will never have the chance to know those painful and grueling memories, but the gas incision left by helping Xu Kaici to breathe after the operation is still showing how painful Xu Kaici was.

Or in the past three years, the pain has not been relieved for a day.

It's just that Cheng Hang thought he was fine, it's just that he thought so.

As soon as Cheng Hang thought that taking Xu Kaici to see a psychiatrist, he would not have so much psychological burden.

Once Cheng Hang thought that taking Xu Kaici away from his hated father would make him feel less sad.

Once Cheng Hang thought that feeding Xu Kaici painkillers that can paralyze the nerves, he would really not be in pain.

It's all Cheng Hang's thought, but it's not true, Xu Kaici has never stopped suffering for a day.

He was so painful and desperate that he didn't even love himself anymore, and he wasn't even afraid of death.

When Cheng Hang thought of this, he couldn't help crying again, and the tears fell like pearls that fell off the thread.

Amidst the tears, he saw Xu Kaici's eyes, and he couldn't even remember when, his little fairy's eyes had turned dim.

He was obviously like a butterfly before, and he could attract everyone's attention just by appearing briskly in front of everyone.

Cheng Hangyi murmured to himself with a strong nasal voice: "Do you know that you have had a lot of stitches on your leg and bled a lot. How long will it take to heal? How long will it take? How long will it take? It will leave scars if you get well, if you love to beautify a person so much, you will be unhappy when you see it in the future."

"I don't know why, or since when, you disliked yourself so much that you didn't want anything. But Xu Kaici, what about me? Don't you want me too? Didn't you say that we will be the only ones in this life? Didn’t you say that you will be buried with me when you die? Then what should I do if you die?”

Probably these few questions played a role, Xu Kaici finally had some expression on his face, and he turned his head to look at Cheng Hangyi.

Watching him cry, watching him panic and still look like he hasn't grown up.

It's hard for Xu Kaici to express how he feels now, obviously yesterday he already tacitly agreed that he lost badly.Seeing Cheng Hangyi's tears today, I feel that this is not the case, as if someone still loves him, and someone is shedding tears for him.

Xu Kaici felt that it was okay for him to die, even now, but impulsiveness and calmness are two completely different states of mind.

When I was impulsive, I felt nothing, but when I died, I was relieved.Now I feel that it is really cruel to leave Cheng Hang alone to face these things.

If something really happened to her, no matter what happened to Xu Chunye, Mei Jing would definitely ask and make things difficult for Cheng Hangyi.

Cheng Hang can't even comfort him, so how could he grow up so quickly to face a person's aftermath?

Xu Kaici seems to have heard Cheng Hangyi say that his leg was cut a lot just now. He tried to think back for a long time, but he couldn't remember why he got it.

He doesn't feel pain, he hurts when he hurts, it's okay.

He tried his best to raise his hand, trying to touch Cheng Hangyi's face and wipe away the tears on his face.

It's a pity that he only raised it a little, and his hand fell down and fell on the quilt.

Because of this little movement, the blood oxygen clip also slipped from his fingertips, and his hands returned to the curled up state. The instrument let out a piercing scream, and Xu Kaici couldn't help but frowned.

Cheng Hang immediately pulled Xu Kaici's finger out, clamped the blood oxygen clip, and the piercing voice calmed down.

He saw Xu Kaici's mouth opening and closing under the oxygen mask, and there was a little faint sound. He stood up, gently removed Xu Kaici's oxygen mask, and put his ear close to his lips.

"Brother, tell me to listen."

Xu Kaici was still a little short of breath when he spoke, his voice was still panting, and his chest heaved accordingly: "Don't cry, I don't hurt."

Cheng Hang wiped away his tears, rubbed his red nose, grinned ugly and said, "I didn't cry, I was just scared by you, you don't know how scared I am."

Xu Kaici would not talk about how painful he was, but Cheng Hangyi would express how scared he was. Not only did he want to express his fear, Cheng Hangyi suddenly wanted to formally talk about how he felt about Xu Kaici.

This answer may not be what Xu Kaici wanted to hear the most, but it was his only feeling after so many things happened tonight.

He gently pulled Xu Kaici's hand, avoiding the blood oxygen clip on his index finger, and inserted his finger between Xu Kaici's fingers.

I never thought that one day I will be in the hospital, and I will see my heart clearly in front of the hospital bed, and the purpose of expressing my heart is not to express my love, but to try my best to keep him.

"Meng Xinci and I have known each other since junior high school. Before the senior high school entrance examination, I told him that I liked him in a cryptic way, but I couldn't think of it. He didn't understand. It just happened that there was an opportunity to live on campus. Then How could I know that he already has someone he likes very much, and I don’t even know that someone can entrust his whole heart to others at such a young age. I can’t do it, if I and Meng Xinci has been together since we were very young, maybe I will get tired of him, he is boring, he talks less and is not humorous. It is because we have never been together, so I feel... I feel a lot of regrets, I always want to To try."

"I really don't have anything with him. On the contrary, it's you, the first kiss is you, and the first time I go home with someone is also you. It's just that we have too little happy time together. It's only a year and a half. Then you have an accident. In the future, I feel that we are not very happy. I don’t know why you also feel unhappy. This unhappiness makes me want to escape, makes me feel depressed, and I always feel that you are going to tie me. But every time we After a quarrel, and seeing you in such an uncomfortable state again, I will feel very guilty again, and I feel that I shouldn't quarrel with you, and I shouldn't lose my temper with you."

Xu Kaici moved his hand vigorously, and pinched Cheng Hangyi slightly with his feeble fingers.

Before I drowned, I didn't feel that my life was playing like a slide show, but now I feel that many pictures are flashing in front of my eyes like a lantern.

Before paralysis, after paralysis.

Kiss, hug, tease.

Movies, fireworks, bars.

Quarrel, reconciliation, resentment.

So when exactly did neither of them feel happy?

When did the two of them lose their happiness?

Xu Kaici wanted to say something, but didn't know how to say it. It was too difficult for him to talk about happiness now.

But he hoped that Cheng Hang could be happier. It's hard to talk about feelings. Even if he gritted his teeth and refused to admit it, he knew in his heart that he had already lost in this relationship.

When he didn't notice, when Cheng Hangyi didn't know.

It is because I clearly know that I have lost, so I want an answer that makes my loss less ugly.

The pain in my heart was exacerbated because I couldn't get the answer I wanted.

It turned out that Xu Kaici hadn't won anywhere.

As soon as Cheng Hang saw Xu Kaici's red eyes, he thought that what he said had hurt his heart again, so he stopped in fright.

All he could do in silence was to stretch out his other hand to wipe away the tears still in Xu Kaici's eyes.

He choked up and asked Xu Kaici: "Can we have a little more happy time?"

Cheng Hang wore cold clothes all night. Although the clothes were dry, his body was no warmer than Xu Kaici's.

This time, the fingertips touched Xu Kaici's conscious place. Xu Kaici was shocked by the sudden coolness, and he shrank under the quilt.

He was also worried that his actions would be seen as avoidance and rejection in Cheng Hangyi's eyes.

He slowly leaned forward again, and Ren Chenghang rubbed and touched his face with his cold hands.

Xu Kaici answered him slowly: "I will see a doctor when I am discharged from the hospital."

It's hard to be happy, but because it's you, I'm willing to try, at least I have to keep doing it.