Looking back

Sometimes I can't help but think, what happens to most people when they suddenly understand something?Suddenly realized, relieved, or beat the chest, repented, or turned a blind eye, deceiving oneself and others?

I don't know what will happen to other people, I just know that I have experienced it too many times in the past ten years.

As a newborn, after a dozen days and nights, I was sure I was time-traveled, and it took even longer to come to terms with that fact.

When I was 2 years old, I could already understand the speech of the people around me. I thought that I was born in the cradle of the largest empire in human history. I watched my father Khan work for the Tatar Ministry and march eastward for those bossy people. Xidou watched his mother and sister tenaciously self-reliant in the midst of ups and downs.

When I was 4 years old, in a harsh and wild place, the martial arts atmosphere brought by Guo Jing and the Seven Monsters of the South of the Yangtze River was the last weak connection between me and the world I once had. strengthen this connection.

When I was 10 years old, I met the opportunity I had been waiting for for a long time. That opportunity appeared in the form of a similar person, so I embarked on a long journey like an energetic and tireless colt, looking for cheats, practicing martial arts, and exploring the plot Characters, every detail can make me feel at ease, let me confirm the existence of the past world in my heart, and further, confirm my own existence.

At the age of 16, I returned to the place where I was born. I want to wait for something destined here. I want to watch the story of the original work unfold. One's first class box.

However, I have seen too much, but I am confused.

I once remembered that I regarded several ancient books brought by Zhu Cong as treasures. The familiar characters and civilizations in the books were like the dazzling light of the sun to me, attracting me to jump on them like a moth.But only a few years later, that dazzling light has become one of the many stars competing for brilliance in the night sky. Yes, they are all the same star, the only difference is the distance.

The arteries of Eastern and Western cultures opened up a wider world to me. The ancient Silk Road really bloomed in this period.The caravan of camels brought the glass of Venice, and the bard brought the story of the Crusades, telling the long-lasting hatred and conquest, but the cross of the missionary was in the same tent as the Koran of the Muslim, dyed The scent of Arabian spices that once smoldered in the Arabian Nights.

These remind me all the time, how vast the territory is on this continent, how many ethnic groups live on it, and how many splendid cultures have been bred on it. The motherland that cannot be integrated is just a corner of this peaceful corner of the Eurasian continent.

I realized the vastness of the world, but I still chose to go back to the East. Even though my body was young and full of vitality, my heart was still as tired as an old man, yearning for the familiar environment that would make me feel at ease.

The Song court in the south has been corrupted to the root. The tug-of-war between the surrender faction and the main combat faction, the huge annual tribute and the limited military expenditure, the greedy officials and the excessive issuance of silver bills have all increased the burden on the people, and the culprit among the complaints will always be It was the Jurchens of the Jin Dynasty, so they couldn't wait to make an alliance with Mongolia as a shortcut to solve everything.

I don't know how Genghis Khan planned.I am his favorite little daughter in the book, but I have not had much parent-child time with him. His time is spent on expeditions and dealing with affairs. For this mysterious figure in history, I haven't had much opportunity to find out.

When the third sister got married, he said at the farewell ceremony, "You must make up your mind to be my foot; when I fight, you must be my assistant; when I gallop, you must be my steed." .”

The third sister naturally understood that the place she was going to was the gateway to the south, the rest stop behind the Gobi Desert.But her father said to her again, "Although there are many things you should cherish, nothing is more important than your life."

Yes, he had high hopes for his daughters, but I did not learn to be a manager like my sisters did, taught by my mother and grandmother.Even if it was the original plan, marrying Wang Han's tribe would not have much room for improvement, and marrying a childhood sweetheart, a poor Han boy, is more like a puzzle, a puzzle that can only be explained by the golden finger of the original book.

Later, Guo Jing went south to complete the mission of assassinating Wanyan Honglie. A few days later, when I also bid farewell to my parents, my father didn't ask too much questions, let alone objected.He said, "Nothing could give me greater joy and peace of mind than that my daughter has learned the skills to protect her own precious life."

I nodded, Genghis Khan, a generation of geniuses, every word he said to people can arouse the deepest emotion in the bottom of my heart.

He added, "I hope you open your eyes and polish your heart. The world in the south is very different, and the minds of the people in the south are so complicated. I need you to see it clearly for me, so that I can manage it well." .”

I misunderstood this sentence at the time, and it was too late when I understood it.

In the heart of the Mongolian Empire, I just came back from my second sister’s Oirat Kingdom and my third sister’s Wanggu Kingdom. I heard my father Khan mention my marriage to me again. Only with a certain prestige and experience can I be worthy of my daughter and be qualified to own the southern hometown with you."

I lack the eyes to see through the fog, and I cannot see the direction of the future from the slightest omen. Only when this future clearly appeared before me did I realize that, outside the sphere of influence of the novel, history still follows its own rules. strong law.

A story is always just a story, and after it hits a beautiful and fragile splash in the torrent of history, it is fleeting.However, at this time, I have already jumped into the splash, and I am about to burst quietly like a transparent bubble.

This is all doomed, when I decided that this is martial arts, when I was determined to surpass the world in martial arts, when I was watching the development of the plot, I was already on a dead end.

But at this time, fate told me cruelly, what I missed, I missed all possibilities.There will be no skin left, all possibilities, with millions of actors and audiences, with the land of China as a stage, on this stage, become a director who wants to destroy, change, arrange, and build all possibilities , will follow the disappearance of my life and turn into a dream that I can't dream in time.

I did not participate in the mobilization before the Western Expedition, and I can imagine how at a loss Guo Jing was at this time.I was only able to attend the banquet afterwards, sitting at the end and watching Genghis Khan pay respects to Qiu Chuji.

I used to have such a deep prejudice against this old Taoist priest, but now I feel a kind of fate.This is the gap between history and novels. This old Taoist priest is a martial arts character who hates evil like hatred in the book, and an old man with a long-term vision in history. But here, for him, is the fusion of identities, but for me, it is the split of identities.

Who am I, a man of the world who studied under ancient tombs, killed iron corpses, and used poison well, or was I the daughter of Genghis Khan, the future queen of a land?

Of the two of us, I'm afraid only one can survive.

My mother knew that my health was not good, and the tribe's witch doctor couldn't do anything about it, so she invited Qiu Chuji, who was proclaimed as a fairy by Yukou, to diagnose me.

Many people know my two identities, Guo Jing, Jiangnan Six Monsters, and Yang Kang.However, they are all prophets. I am a Mongolian princess, and I later found out that I am also a member of the Jianghu, and Qiu Chuji is no exception. In fact, it is the second time for me to see him, and it is the first time for him to see me.

He quickly accepted the fact that the Mongolian princess might also be able to speak fluent Chinese, and learned the martial arts of the Central Plains from his master. Can you understand your own situation?"

I sneered from the bottom of my heart, if he also saw the countdown to the death god, how could I not know, so he proposed to screen back the left and right to make a quiet diagnosis.As a princess, it is impossible to be diagnosed alone. Grandma will accompany me, but she can’t understand our words, and there are not many people who can understand here, so I guess who he is avoiding. .

It didn't take long to diagnose the pulse, and soon Qiu Chuji put away the jade pillow on his wrist, but he didn't mention my injury, but instead asked, "Princess, do you know why I took Kang'er as my apprentice?"

Naturally, I didn't directly answer yes or no, "My father Khan took in Guo Jing, mother and son, and the six Jiangnan monsters."

He looked at me with a smile, "That's what I know." He stroked his beard and continued, "I promised the Jiangnan Six Monsters to find their mother and son, not only to teach martial arts to be a man, but also to make the Yang family have a future."

I nodded to show that I knew. I was a little impatient in my heart, and I also had some panic that I couldn't express. I just looked at him quietly, because I knew he still had something to say.Finally he turned the topic back to the topic, "Princess's blessings are profound, and she will not end up in the sky. If she can give up some things, it will not be difficult to live to the age of poverty."

Ecstasy welled up in my heart, overshadowing the faint panic and doubt in my heart. I almost replied eagerly, "You can only gain if you give up, I understand. But I would like to ask the real person, what do you want to give up?"

"Give up martial arts."

I smile, I can do this.

He continued, "And my apprentice."

I laughed out loud and looked up at the sky.In Mongolia, no matter how luxurious the tent is, it cannot get rid of the practice of opening the dome. A piece of black sky is like a piece of black jade embedded in the top of the tent.Once again, I had the feeling that my guts were throbbing from laughing: so it was waiting for me here!I thought there would be more bloody settings and more entangled conflicts, so I was dismissed like this?

I understand the first to give up, I just wonder why I didn't think of it earlier.Since the internal force is unfettered and clashes with the residual poison, how about completely abolishing it?However, I always thought it was impossible to do it. All the learning and experience I received here told me that it is almost impossible to abolish martial arts without damaging the meridians. Maybe only those who have cultivated to the peak can do it.

As for the second one to give up, I pretended to be puzzled, "Why did the real man say such a thing? My son-in-law is Guo Jing, so why should I have anything to do with my disciples? Even though I can't have children," I just realized this fact suddenly. When I was only worried about life before, I never considered the sequelae of poisoning. I continued, "All children are gifts from the Longevity Heaven. No woman will harm a concubine, even if you are a princess. My mother, I sisters who treat all children equally.”

I steadied my mind, and said as calmly as possible, "If the Taoist priest is worried about being loyal and good, there is no need for it."

Qiu Chuji shook his head, "I'm not worried about Guo Jing, I'm worried about my apprentice."

In an instant, this old man who was sometimes a stubborn Taoist priest whom I hated, and sometimes a fairy, suddenly turned into a demon who could see through his heart.And my desire for life was exposed too strongly, so that I had no trump card to continue to fight, so I had to put all my eggs in one basket and said, "Does the Taoist priest mean that I will renege on my engagement?"

I knew he didn't dare to say that, it was tantamount to questioning the integrity and authority of the Great Khan, but he shook his head and said, "Whether the princess and the son-in-law are married or not, I dare not judge rashly. No matter how you and Guo Jing are, I only hope that the princess will agree. Don't let my apprentice give up the lineage because of you, and cut off the incense of the Yang family."

In an instant, this sentence went back and forth thousands of times in my mind, but I couldn't find a loophole.Whether I marry him alone, or I am with him but can't have children, it is included. I must let him find other women to have children with him, but this is something I will never tolerate.I can say generously and tolerantly that I don't care that the son-in-law Guo Jing has other children, and I will bring up those children well and do what I say, but I will never accept that he has children with other women, as long as we still have children. Together, even if you talk about it, think about it, it's impossible!

Did the old man on the opposite side see this and think of this?I don't believe it, he only saw some germs and just wanted to permanently eradicate the aftermath.In the end, I only have one thing to say, and this is already an admission of defeat, "I can promise the real person now, but when the real person cures me, what can you give me to fulfill the promise?"

He pondered for a long time, in fact, he can do a lot, I and my relatives, it is actually very easy for him to kill one or two.But I know he can't do it. Killing people just for the sake of a long-term agreement to let the Yang family have a future is too inconsistent with the usual moral norms.

Sure enough he said, "I can't force the princess unless you swear on your mother's name."

I turned my head and saw my mother, Queen Puerti, whom everyone admired. She was watching the question and answer between me and Qiu Chuji calmly. She seemed not at all curious and seemed to know everything. She kept holding me. Give me strength and calm my grief and anger.

Determination and luck were slowly crumbling, and I heard myself say, "Okay."

Another voice said, "Then please invite the princess to come to Mount Zhongnan within half a year, and the poor will make good medicine."

I held on to Grandma's arm tightly and went back to the banquet. I stared at the wine glass in a daze while I was drinking.I found that my life is always a countdown. I count how long I will go, where and what to do, how long it will start, how long I will die, and now how long I will be separated.

Also, how long can this ridiculous agreement keep me bound!