Tagged post bipolar omega

When Lu Jinsen smelled the fragrance of peach blossoms coming from the top of the mountain, Xie Zhitang did not smell the fragrance of peach blossoms because of the spread of his own pheromones. He didn't discover the clue until Xie Zhitang saw the pink on the mountain from a distance.

Lu Jinsen originally thought that Xie Zhitang would immediately run happily into the peach blossom forest, but unexpectedly, Xie Zhitang quickly turned around and looked at Lu Jinsen in surprise, his eyes almost sparkled.

How cute, Lu Jinsen thought.

Immediately, Lu Jinsen let go of the hand he was holding with Xie Zhitang, lifted it up and put it on Xie Zhitang's shoulder, pushed him up the mountain, and after giving Xie Zhitang an upward force, Lu Jinsen smiled lightly: "It's a peach blossom, go up and have a look .”

Xie Zhitang nodded briskly at Lu Jinsen, and ran up.

Because they climbed the mountain for more than half an hour, Xie Zhitang's physical strength was almost exhausted, but due to the stimulation of the peach blossoms on the mountain, Xie Zhitang hardly felt tired and ran up the mountain.

The peach blossom forest is obviously much shorter than other trees. Each tree is only more than three meters high, but it grows very well, and the peach blossoms are also in full bloom.

There are only one type of peach tree, but the colors of peach blossoms are different.Everything from white to light pink, dark pink, and even red may bloom on the same tree.

The flower colors are different, but the stamens are all golden yellow, piled together in clusters, and only the slender green leaves can be seen in the gaps between the flowers.

Xie Zhitang has never seen so many peach trees, a large area is all pink, overlapping, attractive and fragrant.

Lu Jinsen followed Xie Zhitang up, and before seeing Xie Zhitang slipping into the peach grove, he deliberately turned his head to look at himself.

Seeing that Lu Jinsen was not far behind, Xie Zhitang could see himself clearly, so he went into the Taolin with peace of mind.

Lu Jinsen watched Xie Zhitang shuttle through the peach forest, lay on the tree and stared at the peach blossoms for a long time, then stepped back to look at the overall shape of the peach tree.

When Lu Jinsen walked in, Xie Zhitang turned around as if eyes had grown on the back of his head and said, "Why are there still peach blossoms at this time? Is this "the fragrance of the world is exhausted in April, and the peach blossoms in the mountain temple begin to bloom"?"

Lu Jinsen felt that it made sense, so he nodded.

Xie Zhitang wandered around in the bamboo forest for a while, and suddenly borrowed a terminal from Lu Jinsen.

Lu Jinsen didn't ask Xie Zhitang what he wanted to use the terminal for, but took out the terminal from his pocket, raised his hand to unlock the password, and handed it to Xie Zhitang.

What Xie Zhitang wanted to do was very simple. He took the phone and posted it on Lu Jinsen and asked, "Brother, can I take a photo and post it on social software?"

Lu Jinsen nodded and said, "Yes,

up to you. "Then I saw Xie Zhitang looking left and right at Taolin, almost jumping up and down and taking a few steps back to find an angle, and clicked on the camera function of the terminal to shoot.

Xie Zhitang did not study photography professionally, but his art skills gave him rich experience in composition, so the things he took also had his style.

After Xie Zhitang finished taking the photo, he adjusted the color tone with the built-in function of the terminal, and then posted it on social software.

Xie Zhitang never read the comments, so he didn't realize that the comments on the last photo he posted had exceeded the normal value. He still posted the photo and then quit, returning the terminal to Lu Jinsen.

There is also a small pavilion in the peach forest, which is smaller than the pavilion on the mountainside, but there are stone tables and chairs in the pavilion, which have been cleaned up by the drivers who came up by car, and tea and snacks were also served.

Xie Zhitang lay down on the table, and Lu Jinsen introduced this peach grove to him: "In the past, the mountain was full of trees, but there was no peach grove. Until my great-grandfather's generation, because my great-grandmother liked peach blossoms, my great-grandfather gave me peach blossoms on the mountain. He planted peach orchards."

Xie Zhitang held his face and thought for a while, then suddenly asked: "Then these peach trees...have a history of a hundred years?"

"No." Lu Jinsen poured a cup of tea for Xie Zhitang, and said slowly, "Peach trees don't last that long, and these trees have been replaced three batches. Although they are still peach trees, they are not the same as the peach trees planted by my great-grandfather for my great-grandmother." What's the connection?"

Xie Zhitang froze for a moment, then leaned back on the table with a sad expression.

Seeing that Xie Zhitang was depressed, Lu Jinsen asked, "Do you feel it's a pity?"

"No." Xie Zhitang shook his head, lowered his eyes and stared at the teacup in his hand for a few seconds, and said nothing.

So Lu Jinsen didn't ask any more questions and changed the subject.

Lu Jinsen opened the pastry box, put it in front of Xie Zhitang and asked, "Does Tangtang want to make some new friends?"

Xie Zhitang raised his head abruptly, and was about to speak when he suddenly understood what Lu Jinsen meant.

Xie Zhitang was startled for a moment, and after a long time, he suddenly summoned up his courage and said to Lu Jinsen, "I... the dog I raised before was called Mauritius."

"It's a meteorite border collie." Xie Zhitang gestured at a length and said, "The first time I saw it, it was only this big."

"En." Lu Jinsen responded lightly to show that he was listening.

"Later..." Xie Zhitang lowered his eyes and lightly hooked his hands together on the table. Xie Zhitang took a deep breath and continued: "Later, I was in the studio once, very annoying. I couldn't draw what I wanted to draw. It’s really annoying to think that it’s almost impossible to draw.”

Xie Zhitang spread out his palms, looked at his palms and said, "Then I smashed the studio..."

Speaking of this, Xie Zhitang looked at Lu Jinsen with some awkwardness and said, "Just like I demolished your house, I smashed the studio."

Lu Jinsen said "hmm" again, keeping his eyes on Xie Zhitang to show that he was listening carefully.

The peach blossoms were blown to the ground by the wind, bringing bursts of floral fragrance. If you look carefully, you can see hardworking bees shuttling between the flowers.

Xie Zhitang smelled the fragrance of flowers, and suddenly his voice became hoarse: "Mauritius is always by my side, and it was also at that time. But I...I still couldn't control myself. When I realized it, Mauritius hid in the corner, sobbing looking at me with tails."

"It's very obedient...it must have been frightened." Xie Zhitang looked at his hands with unavoidable disgust, and frowned, "I... hesitated for a while, I was afraid that it would be afraid of me, so I didn't dare to approach it."

Lu Jinsen looked at Xie Zhitang calmly, waiting patiently for him to finish telling the story.

"But when I finally tried to get close to it, even though it was trembling with fear, it still didn't avoid my hand." Xie Zhitang closed his eyes, turned his palm over, pressed it on the table and said, "But I'm even more scared more frightened than it running away from me."

"Mauritius always hangs its tail when it gets close to the studio, but it is still so close to me. Whenever it sees me, it wags its tail and runs towards me whenever it sees me. It seems that it is the studio that scares it, not me." Xie Zhitang After a pause for several seconds, he continued: "It trusts me so much, but I..."

"I couldn't support its trust." Xie Zhitang said: "When I found out that Mauritius still trusted me, I..."

Xie Zhitang was still speechless, and finally closed his mouth.

But this did not affect Lu Jinsen's understanding of Xie Zhitang's words.Xie Zhitang frightened his dog when he fell ill, but the dog was not afraid of him because of this incident, but Xie Zhitang felt that he had failed the dog's trust.

Is it because of such a precedent of "hurting others" that Xie Zhitang refuses to establish intimate relationships with other people?Lu Jinsen pondered.

Xie Zhitang refused to interact with the outside world when he was a teenager. Now that he is 21, there are only a few people who know him well except his parents.

Even so, Xie Zhitang didn't establish any emotional connection with those few people.

Xie Zhitang calmed down for a while, suddenly smiled, raised his hand and drew a straight line on the table, then pointed to the straight line and said to Lu Jinsen, "Some people are on this side, some people are on the other side, and I am in the middle."

"Occasionally... I would think, if I was there, I would be there completely." The smile on Xie Zhitang's face disappeared just once, and he continued, "Maybe I won't be like this..."

Xie Zhitang's expression was not right, Lu Jinsen immediately leaned forward slightly, and comforted him: "You have realized your mistake, and you have reached the stage of choosing to change yourself or choose to indulge yourself, right?"

Xie Zhitang opened his eyes, met Lu Jinsen's gaze, then almost avoided looking at Lu Jinsen's blue eyes, but kept thinking about Lu Jinsen's words in his heart.

Lu Jinsen said a lot to him in the past two days, things that contradicted his three views.

But he couldn't refute any sentence... Lu Jinsen was right.

What Lu Jinsen said this morning completely shook his worldview. He didn't want to refute Lu Jinsen, but at the same time he was stubbornly unwilling to admit his mistakes.

Lu Jinsen looked at him gently this morning and said: "I admit that the family of origin will have an impact on the shaping of the character of young children and teenagers. However, when he grows up and matures, he will understand what is right and what is right. it is wrong."

"When he realizes that something is wrong, he can choose to correct himself or indulge himself. The only thing that can think about anyone's future is their own choice."

Lu Jinsen is also talking about this now, he raised his hand and clicked on the line drawn by Xie Zhitang, and said, "Tangtang, where you are, whether you are on the left or on the right, does not affect what kind of person you want to be. "

"Genes, brains, family factors, social factors, none of these can determine a person." Lu Jinsen held up Xie Zhitang's hand and said, "You know what kind of person you don't want to be, right?"

But now, Xie Zhitang seemed to have thought everything through, but also seemed to think nothing, his mind went blank, but his whole body felt light.

He has learned what is right and what is wrong.

Lu Jinsen was right, he knew what kind of person he didn't want to be, so he chose to change himself instead of indulging himself.

Xie Zhitang relaxed all around, and immediately felt frivolous all over.Only Lu Jinsen's hand on the back of his hand still had some weight, leaving him in the world.

Xie Zhitang's brain is like a host computer during an anti-virus upgrade, every corner has been searched carefully to ensure that there is no virus left behind, so Xie Zhitang lost control of his body, dizzy, he didn't even know how to return to Lu's old house Know.

But when Xie Zhitang woke up again, he was completely in the state after the system upgrade.

Like breaking the shackles and breaking the seal, Xie Zhitang suddenly became relaxed and happy visibly to the naked eye.

During the few days of vacation, Lu Jinsen took Xie Zhitang to visit all the interesting places around the old house. Xie Zhitang asked Lu Jinsen for a notebook to carry around while playing.

What is drawn in the notebook is his design drawing——

Together, Lu Jinsen and Xie Zhitang chose a four-story single-family villa with a front and back garden and a total construction area of ​​over [-] square meters as a new home. Xie Zhitang was drawing the design for his new home.

Lu Jinsen has also read Xie Zhitang's book several times, but the book is full of sketches, and Lu Jinsen can't really see Xie Zhitang's design.

But since he asked Xie Zhitang to design it, he didn't care about it, he trusted Xie Zhitang.

Besides, because of this incident, Xie Zhitang became obviously busy.To be precise, it was Lu Jinsen who finally found a coup for Xie Zhitang to pass the time.

Not only did Xie Zhitang no longer hold the pillow in a daze, but he also began to search for interior design information as hard as Lu Jinsen.

Xie Zhitang even signed up for an online teaching course on interior design for himself, and while distractedly listening to the class, he kept drawing design drafts.

In the past, it was Xie Zhitang who waited for Lu Jinsen to go home for dinner, but now it was Lu Jinsen who knocked on Xie Zhitang's door after returning to the hotel, and asked him if he had finished his morning or afternoon work and was ready for dinner.

Xie Zhitang has changed a lot, but Lu Jinsen has adapted well.

At the end of April, Lu Jinsen had a lot of things to do. Almost every night after taking a walk with Xie Zhitang, he had to work two hours of overtime in the hotel.

Unlike the past when Lu Jinsen was working, Xie Zhitang just found something to pass the time. Now that Lu Jinsen is working, Xie Zhitang sits opposite him and works together. Xie Zhitang uploads the design drawings to the computer, and then communicates with the decoration team.

Lu Jinsen handed over all this matter to Xie Zhitang, which was an expression of his utmost trust in him.So despite the help of other designers, Xie Zhitang still wanted to do his best to live up to Lu Jinsen's hope.

Although Xie Zhitang started to have his own job and gradually became busy, his clingy ability did not fade at all, and even improved to a higher level.

If Xie Zhitang woke up earlier than Lu Jinsen in the morning, he would grope into Lu Jinsen's room half asleep, into Lu Jinsen's arms, and sleep again in the dark room.

No matter how good Lu Jinsen's sleep quality is, there is another person in his arms

Nor will they be ignorant.But Xie Zhitang was too obedient, after getting into his arms, he lay down quietly, not making any noise, as if he was just looking for a place to sleep, and he could really fall asleep in a daze.

In this case, Lu Jinsen did not say no to Xie Zhitang.Even when he went out, Lu Jinsen no longer closed the door of his room, but always left a small opening for Xie Zhitang, so that Xie Zhitang could come in and out at will to show his attitude.

Lu Jinsen has been in communication with the psychologist.

Many of Xie Zhitang's behaviors are difficult to understand if they are placed on ordinary people, but if you always keep in mind that Xie Zhitang is a patient, then many things will become clear.

The psychiatrist not only provides psychological counseling for Xie Zhitang, but also provides psychological counseling for Lu Jinsen.

Lu Jinsen has been seeing a psychiatrist every week since he was a child, which is very common for him. Lu Jinsen has been learning how to regulate and control his emotions since he was a child, and this habit has not changed until now.

It's just that the focus of the conversation is different.

The recurrence of bipolar disorder is not only a problem for patients, but also a problem that needs to be overcome for family members.

Xie Zhitang has been ill for so long, and his condition also has its ups and downs, so naturally there are times when it gets better.

When Xie Zhitang was in a good state of mind, he was no different from ordinary people.He can go months without illness, return to normal life, and there is nothing wrong with his mood.

Xie Zhitang was in particularly good condition.Most of the words of Xie Zhitang that are circulated in the market are drawn by him at that time.At that time, Xie Zhitang also resumed contact with the outside world and became active in the painting circle.

Everyone thought that these years of hard work had paid off, and the doctor also thought that Xie Zhitang's condition had improved, so he began to consider reducing the dosage of Xie Zhitang's medicine, as long as he kept the most basic medicine.

Just when he was full of hope, Xie Zhitang fell ill again.

Xie Zhitang has always had a very clear understanding of his illness, so he didn't feel sad because of the illness.But Xie's mother had too much hope for Xie Zhitang's recovery, so when Xie Zhitang fell ill again, Xie's mother was too sad and fell ill.

Such a capricious condition not only puts a lot of pressure on Xie Zhitang himself, but also puts a lot of pressure on Xie Zhitang's relatives, attending doctors and the medical staff who take care of him.

In the same way, Xie Zhitang's condition had a great impact on Lu Jinsen.

Lu Jinsen's psychiatrist will analyze Xie Zhitang's condition, then affirm Lu Jinsen's role in it, and make a conservative expectation of Xie Zhitang's future situation, to remind Lu Jinsen that bipolar disorder is difficult to cure.

But Lu Jinsen has always had a deep understanding of Xie Zhitang's expression.

He didn't think that Xie Zhitang's condition would improve, so he fell in love with Xie Zhitang.Before he decided to fall in love with Xie Zhitang, he had already made up his mind that even if Xie Zhitang would continue to be ill until the last second of his life, he would still like Xie Zhitang.

This emotion did not change because of Xie Zhitang's illness.

But this does not mean that Lu Jinsen will let Xie Zhitang's condition go. On the contrary, Lu Jinsen has always paid attention to Xie Zhitang's condition.

This is not in conflict. Even though Xie Zhitang's condition has obviously improved now, Lu Jinsen has not given up contacting foreign hospitals, and has not given up on getting Xie Zhitang to receive better treatment.

Lu Jinsen had several talks with the psychiatrist and Xie's father, Xie's mother. Xie's father, Xie's mother also talked with Xie Zhitang for a long time. It was almost after many scrutiny that they barely reached a consensus.

Now that Lu Jinsen and Xie Zhitang have started a relationship, no matter what the reason is, Lu Jinsen must wait until the end of the five-year contract period before Lu Jinsen can break up with Xie Zhitang or get married.

If they broke up, the contract between Lu Jinsen and Xie's father would still be valid, and Lu Jinsen would still be able to get his own salary.

If Lu Jinsen and Xie Zhitang persevere and enter the marriage hall together after five years, the contract will be voided, but the original remuneration will still be given to them as a wedding gift for them.

Xie Zhitang has no objection to this. He likes the baby in Xie's mother's womb very much. When making the design drawings for the new home, he also drew the design drawings for the baby's new room. In order to cope with the baby's possible gender, a total of Ordered six copies.

Lu Jinsen smiled when he saw Xie Zhitang's design, and asked him why he didn't draw the picture after the sex was checked out so that he didn't have to draw six copies.

But Xie Zhitang said that this is the way to express his love.

Lu Jinsen closed the document, thinking of Xie Zhitang, he couldn't help but lowered his head and smiled, seeing that twenty minutes had passed the off-duty time, he got up and prepared to go home.

The new home that Xie Zhitang has been preparing for several months has taken shape.Xie Zhitang knocked down an entire wall to place the fish tank, and now the fish tank is ready.

So Xie Zhitang proposed in the morning that he could catch the small fish he caught in the sea and send them back to Jiang Haichao's house, put them in the fish tank of his new home, and raise some small animals to accompany him.

Lu Jinsen always let Xie Zhitang take care of small things, so he immediately asked the driver to pick it up.

The fish should have been swimming in the tank by now, Lu Jinsen thought, and got off the elevator with Li Zhe.

Lu Jinsen sat in the car in a happy mood, and after he put on his seat belt, he received several messages from Xie Zhitang's nurse.

Lu Jinsen frowned slightly, opened the terminal, and Xie Zhitang's nurse politely asked Lu Jinsen when he would arrive at the hotel.

Lu Jinsen replied immediately: 15 minutes at the latest, what's the matter?

The nurse replied quickly: Tangtang seems to be in a bit of a mood today, and is hiding in your room now.We're not sure if he's OK, so we'd like to wait and see when you get back.

The author has something to say: Happy Chinese Valentine's Day!

感谢在2020-08-2323:59:26~2020-08-2523:23:11期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel who threw the landmine: baaaa, 1 green leaf;

Thanks to the little angels of irrigation nutrient solution: 36 bottles of Chang Fan; 19 bottles of Kaga Qingguang; 15 bottles of Yang Yang; 5 bottles of Xiao Xuan;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!