Like Love But Not

"Because of your actions, you didn't even notice it..." He took a deep breath, and the expression on his face was the kind of loneliness with a smile that I was most familiar with: "You know, human beings Body language is the least deceiving. When you like someone, your eyes will follow him involuntarily; The street can see very clearly, if it is not a very precious person, it will not be so gentle. What's more, the person who becomes gentle is you?"

"What did I do? I just..."

He suddenly stepped forward and stretched out his hands to my neck, helping me turn up my collar carefully.This is the first time in a long time that he is so close to me, so close that I can feel his breath, the scene in front of me is suddenly a little blurred, I simply close my eyes, his fingers pull the clothes, as if every day for ten years He made it for me before I went out.The unbelievable gentleness in the movement reaches the bottom of my heart, fermenting the buried longing and loneliness. When I was almost reaching out to hug him, he suddenly pushed me away and asked: "How much temperature is there in a seemingly habitual small movement, do you feel it?" ?”

I'm speechless, what can I say?Do I want to argue that it's true that I am unconsciously and habitually gentler to Xia Mingxiu?It's just inertia, but such a simple thing has become so complicated in his eyes, but I have nothing to say.In the past ten years, I have never done anything similar to such a warm thing to Xiao Heng. Until now, I have no chance to make him think that the meaning of those small actions is more convincing than any feelings I can express without evidence. force.

"It's time to go. I don't think we should see each other often in the future. It's for the good of everyone." He looked at me seriously, stretched out his hand to stroke my hair, paused for a moment at the left ear, didn't say anything, just hung it down His eyes smiled wryly.

But I was terrified, because it seemed that in just a moment, his face suddenly became pale as paper, his lips were a little black, and the hand that was slowly retracted was shaking violently, but he himself was still there as if he didn't realize it. Looking up at me, it's just that the focus of the eyes is starting to get wrong.

"Xiao Heng!" I supported him, and he began to frown with a distressed expression, but when I asked him "Are you okay", he still shook his head and said softly, "It's okay..."

His body became abnormally hot, and his breathing began to be abnormally rapid. He grabbed my clothes with one hand and shook like he was convulsing.I called his name and told him not to be afraid, picked him up, called a car and went straight to the hospital.

Within a short while in the car, his shirt was soaked in sweat. I hugged him tightly, and he was panting heavily in my arms. His face was blue, as if he would faint at any moment, and he looked very scary.I kept yelling at the driver to drive faster and faster, and then I leaned into Xiao Heng's ear to comfort him and let him bear it a little longer.His body curled up and loosened as if he was resisting some kind of torture. I asked him where the pain was, but he clenched his teeth and didn't move. I don't even know if he can still hear me now.

"Xiao Heng, Xiao Heng..." I called him, bowed my head and kissed his forehead, as if this was the only thing I could do during the long suffering.He suddenly stretched out his hand and climbed onto my back with astonishing strength, grabbing my clothes as if he was grabbing driftwood while drowning, and opened his eyes slightly, wanting to What to say, I quickly patted him and said over and over again: "Don't be afraid, I'm here, I won't leave..."

He smiled vainly, his body relaxed, and his body was still convulsed.I looked at his expression that seemed to be satisfied for a moment, and only I knew the bitterness that rushed to the bridge of my nose after being dazed.

Is it only at this time that you dare to spare no effort to catch me again?Who, what bastard drove you to this point...

Disappointments, betrayals, and injuries, whether unintentional or intentional, have gradually become irreparable.I have finally come to this stage today, what qualifications do I have to ask for extravagant...

I watched him being carried away and put into a variety of shocking tubes. He tried to struggle, weakly screaming in pain and reaching out to me to save him. When I rushed over, I was stopped by the people next to me. I could watch him being held down by the medical staff and taken away.Now, he finally calmed down, connected to the bouncing instruments on the screen, lying on the other side of the glass withered like a lifeless thing.

I pressed against the glass, my heart was twitching faintly, he shouldn't, he shouldn't be treated like this.He came to me, pulled out those life-sustaining potions and sneaked out. The story below should not be like this. Why did he see the dumbfounding fact again, and why did it still make him sad?Just like this, mistakes are added to mistakes, and mistakes are added to mistakes, what happened to all this?

Maybe it would be better not to meet again as he said.At least it won't make him suffer any more, won't let him get hurt again, won't let him run out without taking his own life seriously, just to find me.

Nothing good happened to him since I was with me since I was a child. He gave up the qualification of being a top student because of me, was injured by a knife, and was delayed for ten years because of me, and even lost hope of living.If he never had me in his life, he would be better and live a more elegant life than now, maybe he already has a beautiful family and lovely children, but what have I given him?

In the past, all he wanted was me, but I was stingy with even a little tenderness and even a little warmth. Now he probably wants nothing from me at all, but I regret it myself, and hope to get what I lost from him again.He still can't bear to see me sad, so I did this, didn't he hurt him?

When I was finally reflecting on what I had been doing all this time, the person who had put up with me for a long time finally completely lost his patience.Lu Weixi and I fought again, or to be precise, I was beaten up by Lu Weixi.The foreigner with violent blood in his bones got excited and said a lot of French. I think he was scolding me. I also think that just being beaten up is really not enough to relieve hatred. Unfortunately, I really didn’t understand a word of what he was scolding. .

Relatively speaking, Fang Shuyi was extremely calm. He did not ask me to leave immediately like Lu Weixi, but told me: "Xiaoheng will have an operation in two weeks. Can you please Luo Yuchen?" , don't do anything to irritate him in these short fourteen days?"