Deep Cabinet Licking Dog Diary

Rain on Saturday, April [-]rd

Yes, it's raining again today.

When I woke up early in the morning, it was only after seven o'clock. I looked out the window in a daze and the sky was still cloudy. I was so tired that I didn't want to get up.

I didn't sleep well last night, and I couldn't tell whether the intimacy between us was something that actually happened, or it was just a dream of mine.Turning around slowly, I saw Lu Bei sleeping on the other side of the bed with his back to me.

As if nothing happened.

It's just that my thighs are swollen and painful, and I don't know where my underwear went.I sat up and groped on the bed for a long time without success, so I could only get out of bed and go to the suitcase to find the clothes I was going to change and put on first.Until I went to the bathroom to wash up and found that my cute SpongeBob SquarePants boxers had been washed and hung to dry.I suddenly realized: I really got fucked yesterday! !

Gan! ! !

For a moment, I didn't know whether to be happy that he couldn't control my charm, or to be angry at Lu Bei's straight male cancer thinking that "one shot can solve anything".

Is he a male dog in heat? ?Can't stand it after just a few days? ?

I think, after he wakes up, I will have a good talk with him, if he continues to be so frivolous, I will pack up and leave immediately! !

After washing up and feeling a little more sober, I tiptoed back to the room.

Lu Bei was still sound asleep, and I had nothing to do, turning on my phone and watching short videos.While thinking about what he would do today, he looked worriedly at the light rain outside the window. If he had any outdoor plans, it might all go to waste.

It just so happened that the small video software launched a public service advertisement, and the poem came up with the poem "It rains a lot during the Qingming Festival". Only then did I realize that it usually rains almost everywhere in the past few days during the Qingming Festival.

... Then play with wool?

This is common sense, I just neglected to forget, but he clearly made the plan in advance, I don't believe he doesn't know.

Sure enough, they are all fierce tricks.

Heh, man, you have deliberately arranged all kinds of demented behaviors, and you are trying to lie to me that you can watch the sunrise, watch the sea view, and see what a ghost you are!

I am actually very easy to heal my scars and forget the pain, especially easy to be soft-hearted towards Lu Bei.

Seeing that he was still sleeping soundly at the moment, and he had no intention of getting up at all, I guessed that he was tossing around too late last night when he did something wrong, and now he deserves it for his lack of energy and sleepiness.After all, I still showed mercy, thinking that when I went down to have breakfast, I would help him bring something back so that he would not get hungry when he got up.

The big hotel is worthy of being a big hotel. The variety of breakfast varieties dazzled me. There were snacks and desserts from all over the place. I tasted them all, and then only brought a few small breads for Lu Bei.

This is his punishment!I have been kind enough to him! !

But when I just walked to the door of our room, I saw the door opened first. Lu Bei was disheveled, shirtless, put on his outer pants, and rushed out of the room barefoot.

When he bumped into me, he paused for a moment, then his tone was bad, and he asked, "Why did you go so early in the morning?"

I was baffled: "Have breakfast."

Ask him again: "Where are you going naked?"

He didn't answer, and continued to be aggressive: "What bag are you carrying when you go to dinner?!"

Oh, he still has the nerve to ask?

"How can I bring you food without a backpack? Why don't you bring these back in front of everyone? How embarrassing."

"you……"

His chest rose and fell violently, as if he was very angry, he breathed a sigh of relief after a while, and motioned to me sideways: "Come in."

I can't figure it out, what's the wind in the morning.

Carrying the bag into the house, he dumped all the things he brought on the table: "Let's have some food first, don't you want to take me out for a big meal?"

Only then did Lu Bei turn around to look for slippers. His white and broad feet stepped on the carpet, knocking down a fringe of blanket with one footprint.

"You yesterday..." I opened my mouth.

"Huh?" He said wearily.

"Did you do something while I was sleeping?"

He was at a loss: "What?"

"You...you, are you messing with me!"

"Hmm..." Lu Bei thought for a while, then denied it outright, "No."

"Then why is my SpongeBob hanging in the toilet?"

"It's because you were too excited at night, and the wet dream affected me."

"how is this possible?"

Sure enough, he was tricking me again!

I sneered.Yesterday when Lu Bei took a shower, I dealt with my little brother, no matter how excited he was at night, he wouldn't spit it out.

Lu Bei's face was honest: "If you don't believe me, you will be knocked down. Good intentions will not be rewarded."

"Then my leg...in the middle..."

"what happened?"

"Swollen……"

"Are you allergic?" He pretended to be concerned, "I'll go out and buy some medicine for you later."

Deny it to the death.

"...If you do this again, I will be angry." I said sternly.

With a flash of inspiration, I suddenly understood Lu Bei's gaffe just now: "Oh, just now, did you think I packed up my things and ran away?"

A trace of embarrassment flashed across his face: "...how could it be."

"You still have a guilty conscience!" I said in a sincere tone: "Since you know I will be angry, why do you still do that at night!"

"..."

He bowed his head for a while without saying a word, finally raised his face and looked at me deeply.

"I miss you," he said in a low voice, a little aggrieved and coquettish, "I miss you, Xiao Tianer...don't you miss me?"

"I……!"

I choked up.

"It's been almost a month since we separated, and you didn't look for me or send me a message, and you disappeared all of a sudden. How could you do this?" There was a bit of sadness in his eyes, which was even more obvious under the gloomy sky outside the window. Sad: "Didn't you say that you will be with me in the future? How can you say nothing."

"Your heart is so cruel." Lu Bei murmured.

"I?"

"You didn't even give me a chance or a way to make amends, and we never sat down and talked openly and honestly like other couples." He said, "I kept thinking that I might have done a lot of things wrong, But the past can’t be traced, I can’t do it all over again. But after I realized that I want to be with you, I have tried my best to treat you well and make up for you. It’s painful to turn over and over in the memory.”

His tone was sincere and his eyes focused: "I even..."

"I told you that at the beginning, only my mother knew about me in our family. Later, my father probably also knew more or less. But on the day you made a video video with my family, I even had a serious discussion with them in advance. I said hello. Because I think, even you muster up the courage to fight against the family, abandon everything, and stay with me. Then, my old man can’t be cowardly.”

"I thought I didn't have to make a special trip to say a lot of things, you can see it. You are a very careful child, and you should know in your heart how I treat you."

He sighed: "I didn't think we could just let it go. But if you don't want to... No, I think you don't want to either. "

"I'm not a fool, little Tian'er, and you're not a person who can hide things. If you think it will make me feel better to torment me, I'll do as you like." Lu Bei fumbled in his trouser pocket For a while, as if looking for cigarettes: "It's just that sometimes, you just have to feel sorry for me a little bit, and give me some sweetness, that's fine."

After a while, he couldn't find the cigarette, so he sat back and said, "Forgot, I found out that you don't like the smell of cigarettes, so I quit too."

"..."

Lu Bei's eloquence has always been very good, I didn't know what to say for a while.I just know that I also have grievances. I have many, many grievances in my heart, which have been accumulated for too long.

"I thought that everything I did was to bring you closer to me." I said, "Lu Bei, tell me, what am I to you? You are a habit to me. Do you like it, make do with it, or just reluctance to break up a relationship?"

"How do I know that you have feelings for me? How do I know that you... love me? You don't even show any signs or say these words. Your 'love' is so precious, it makes me feel forever Can't catch up."

"You said I don't have an answer, why don't you? I can't give you the answer on how to get me back, just like you can't give me the answer on how to pursue you."

"I'm gradually not understanding how I feel about you. I just think that I'm working very hard, very hard. Since we both work so hard, we can't be together," I said, "Is that right, this paragraph Is the relationship inherently wrong?"

I finally said: "I can endure you, accommodate you, like you, love you. I used to really feel that it doesn't matter if you don't respond to me. But at least, you must always give me a chance to run away when I am tired. Well. Now, then, I'm tired."

Uh, I know, this sentence sounds like I have eaten the weight and decided to break up, but I'm sorry, I'm just talking hard.

Unexpectedly, Lu Bei thought for a long time, and suddenly asked: "Then, can't we turn over the past?"

"..."

I was a little afraid to answer, I was afraid that he would suddenly turn his back on it and say that it was too much trouble for me to turn over old quarrels.

Then I'll play off.

But I can't seem to lie to myself, I just mind a lot of things.

So I said: "No. If it happened, it happened, and if the hurt is engraved in my heart, it is engraved. How could it be possible to "turn over the chapter" easily? People are not machines, and they cannot restore the factory settings. I said I forgot it, but I couldn’t forget it in my heart. Lu Bei, every taboo of yours, every secret you cherish is a painful memory for me. I can’t do anything about you, big brother, I can’t do anything Well, obviously torturing you is torturing myself, but I have no choice."

"I know," Lu Bei listened, lowering his head, and the gloomy light covered his hair like a haze: "I know, but, there is no way to do it again. I regret it too, but it's too late."

The whole game is a dead end.If I don't budge and he doesn't budge, it's always going to be stuck here.

But I won't budge any more.

"I actually don't understand what love is anymore." Lu Bei said: "I thought it was love like first love, heartbeat, pain, resistance, and obsession. But later, when I met you, it seemed to have another meaning. .”

……

If he wanted to say that I was the type of person to settle down and live, I would pack up and leave immediately.

That's fucking love.

That is to make a living.

"You have the ability to heal my wounds. It may be with time, it may be with company, it may be with love. You may not know that you are giving me love, but I can actually feel it, in every detail. , in every second of silence. Your feelings are loyal, pure, powerful, gentle, and endless. Some time ago, I was thinking that now I seem to have lost the ability to be close to people, and I have begun to be unable to express my feelings with ease .Many times, I want to tell you that you are the most important person to me, but I can't always say it."

"But because of you, sometimes I feel that in this world, there seems to be a little more dependence on existence."

"If that's all you want to hear, I can tell you everything bit by bit. If this belated...love can fill your heart with wounds, then I'm willing to feed you back."

Lu Bei finally said: "So maybe it's also love. It's not a collision of passions. Desperation is like blooming fireworks, but like flowing water, from you to me, and then I will flow to you."

"..."

Although he speaks very well!

...But isn't this still the meaning of making do with life?

I said: "But what people can remember is only the vigorous fireworks. The shorter, the more gorgeous, the deeper. Water is necessary, and water is very important, but water cannot be seen or grasped. Even if it is always there, no one can see it." care."

I just want to make fireworks.

I fell in love with that firework Lu Bei, even if he wants to make water now, I don't want to.

Even if the fireworks will be extinguished by water in the end, I want to make a beautiful one.In my remaining youth, burn up my damp love.