Stockholm syndrome

I don't know how long I walked, but I was covered by my school uniform and couldn't see the road. It was Li Weiran who was pushing me.The school uniform is full of his unique boiled water smell.My panting became louder and louder, Li Weiran suddenly stopped, and hugged me tightly in his arms through the school uniform.I couldn't bear it anymore, if he wasn't here, who would hug me like this.

"Ah Shen. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Li Weiran rubbed his hands back and forth on my back, trying to calm my emotions.

"Why do you want to study abroad, why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm sorry." Li Weiran just said sorry, without explaining the reasons for all this.

"What's the use of being sorry, I'll tell you I'm sorry, why don't you go." I grabbed Li Weiran's skirt and shouted loudly, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, don't go."

Li Weiran stopped talking, but hugged me tightly, his hands tightened tighter and tighter.If you think that there will be some forced kissing plot to defuse the excitement, then you are very wrong.I admit that this method works, but for men, the most direct form of communication will always be fists.

I violently tore off Li Weiran's school uniform covering my face, threw it on the ground, and greeted him with my fist.Li Weiran resisted my two punches and then started to fight back.I tried my best, but I still couldn't beat him, before, now, and in the future.Li Weiran cut my hands behind my back.Knee against my calf.

After a stalemate like this for a while, I gradually calmed down.Realizing that I was not resisting, Li Weiran let go of his hand, I knelt down on the ground and looked around, it turned out that we had already come out of the school.Just outside the back door of the school on the small road, there is very little traffic on this road, and only a large number of students will pour out when school is over.I think my brain is really broken, as long as Li Weiran is involved, it will be a mess.He didn't know the situation at all, so he started fighting with Li Weiran. If it was in school, things would become serious.Fear makes me extra sober.I stood up from the ground and patted the dirt on my body. Li Weiran was standing beside him, holding the school uniform in his hands.

"When are you leaving?" I asked.

"It's over after the Chinese New Year, and it's spring school over there."

"Then when are you going to break up with me?"

"No such plan."

"Long-distance relationship. Relying on sending emails to communicate with each other. I guess it won't be long before you don't even remember what I said." Now I am a bit aggressive. Anyone who is in love suddenly has this kind of thing and can't do it. to cool homemade.

"I will return."

"Come back, how many times a year? Or once every few years? What's the difference between this and breaking up." I took a step back and looked away at the sycamore tree by the road. The bare branches looked particularly ugly. "When you come back, you will almost get married."

Li Weiran stopped talking, and looked at me with pursed lips.

"Today, let's make things clear. Have you ever thought about our future? Or do you think that the relationship with me is just a whim. You are tired of playing with beauties, and you want to find a man for a change..." My words Before I could speak, Li Weiran suddenly slapped me on the face, the slap was really ruthless.I supported my head, my mind was a little dazed, and my tinnitus was severe.But this does not delay me to continue to say, for the first time I found that I am so fearless of death. "Have you ever thought about the future, I have! I feel fucking happy with you, I want to spend my life with you. Fuck, I'm a fucking idiot."

"I haven't thought about such a long time ago." Li Weiran looked at me, his eyes were calm and profound.Different from the simple-minded boy with dazed limbs in my acquaintance, this is the first time I have seen the other side of his flamboyant appearance. "I feel very happy to be with you. I really like you, Ye Shen, and I really like you. I am willing to be with you for the rest of my life. But I can't delay my career or hurt my family because of you. I will Inherit the family business, marry a wife and have children. But you will always be my most important person."

"To put it bluntly, I can only be a mistress for you, and it depends on how you feel, young master. If you follow you, I will never see the light in my mother's life." I always thought that Li Weiran was stupid, but in fact I was the real one. that one.A child from a family like theirs is not a human being.He always knew what he was doing and what to do.It was me who couldn't figure out the situation and let myself get stuck in it.

"Ye Shen, I like you. You are the person I love the most in all these years of my life. We can be lovers for a lifetime." Li Weiran's words were very clear.I'm not a fool, but I don't want to be his lover, I want to be his relative.

"Let's break up." After a moment of silence, I raised my head to look at Li Weiran, his nose was red with cold, and the white air he exhaled was blown away by the wind.When he heard my words, he froze obviously.

"Have you made up your mind?" Li Weiran met my eyes.

"Think it over. I don't want to waste time on someone who can't spend my whole life with me." I'm spineless and useless, but I still have a bottom line. I love Li Weiran, but I'm not that cheap.When I love someone, I want to be with him upright.

"Okay." Li Weiran readily agreed.I didn't expect him to be so decisive, maybe I was spoiled by him, I always felt that in this situation, he should hold me tightly, begging me to say those words back.But the fact is that Li Weiran didn't even hesitate for a moment, after I said I had made up my mind, he turned and walked away, without a single pause in his footsteps, he raised his hand and wiped something on his face while walking.

Winter in Beijing is still so cold, Li Weiran's back is getting further and further away, gradually disappearing at the end of the street.He never looked back.I overestimated my weight in Li Weiran's heart.He is a rare person, and he is no worse than me when it comes to right and wrong.If there is no possibility between us, there is no need to get involved.I believe his love for me is true, but if we get deeper and deeper, we will both lose when we are unable to turn back.

Long-term pain is worse than short-term pain, the best way is to cut the mess quickly.I was the one who proposed the breakup, but if he persists, maybe I will really compromise.He is not married yet, and we will talk about the future, and it is a day to be happy every day.Even if he persisted for a while, we would not have this kind of result.

The weather is fine, and the freshwater sun is useless at all.The wind blew on his face, and the dry tears on his face were hurt by the wind.I looked at my right hand, the pale and slender fingers trembling unconsciously.His fingers were completely frozen, and the moment he turned to leave, I suddenly couldn't remember Li Weiran's temperature.That familiar feeling, the temperature that gave me comfort in countless cold days, suddenly I can’t remember it.Li Weiran was a man who said he would do what he said, and since he said yes, there was really nothing else to do.

I have always been complacent about my relationship. Maybe my relationship has really started well, but it will inevitably fall into the cliché, just like all first loves.It started, and there is no more.

I don’t know if Li Weiran remembers it, but this is the 57th day of our relationship, and there are 24 days left before my 19th birthday.I even planned how to celebrate with him on his birthday.It seems that about the future, don't think too much.The gap between ideal and reality will overwhelm you.

There was a McDonald's near the back gate of the school. I didn't want to go home, and I didn't know how to face Lao Zhang, so I had to go there for a while. McDonald's was indeed a shelter for the homeless.My love affair with Li Weiran started at McDonald's and ended here.I don't know if this counts as a good beginning and a good end.

The heating at McDonald's was fully turned on, I lay motionless on the table, and the whole room was filled with the aroma of coffee.When questioning Li Weiran, he couldn't help crying.But when we really broke up, there was no feeling.

I blinked hard, it wasn't a dream.I'm still sitting alone in McDonald's, not on my tiny camp bed.It seems that after Li Weiran appeared in my life, this trick has no effect.

I stayed at McDonald's all afternoon, and then went back to school for evening self-study.There are still five months until the college entrance examination, and I have already prepared well, but I have to practice often in science, and I can't let it go.Li Weiran didn't come to study in the evening, his desk was icy.I was still worried that I didn't know how to face him, but he simply disappeared.On the empty table, there were a few messy papers placed in a mess.In addition to the name and reconciliation, did not write a few words.

It was as if a piece of my heart had been ripped out.I don't know when it will be completed, and it may not be completed all the time.The speed at which all the cells of the human body are iterated is 7 years. Is 7 years enough for me to strip him from my life.I'm 18 now and in 7 years I'll be 25 in my prime and have a lot of time.

Li Weiran disappeared, one day, two days, one week he never showed up.I panicked, even though I knew early on that he would have studied abroad.But this sudden disappearance I really can't accept.I guess I'm feeling like an alcoholic with terminal liver disease, give me one last sip and I'll stop drinking.Let me see Li Weiran one last time, and I will live a good life.

I finally couldn't bear to ask Wang Tianyi, he put his arms around the beautiful girl and looked at me in surprise. "Li Weiran went to England and flew away yesterday. Don't you know?!"