Eros kisses Psyche

Cheng Zhu carried him on his back and walked far away in one breath, until Xu Budie suddenly slapped him on the back and struggled: "I want to vomit..."

As soon as he put him down, before he could stand still, Xu Budie hopped and ran towards the corner of the wall. Only then did Cheng Zhu realize that he had pinched his legs too tightly... This posture is a bit funny... Then He vomited, vomited in a mess, and stretched out his hand to support the wall next to him, but it seemed that there was a problem with judging the distance, and one leg was so numb that he couldn't use his strength, he swayed and slipped, and fell on his own vomiting things.

Cheng Zhu sighed, so he could only go over to help him up, turned over to find a pack of tissues, but there was none.Cheng Zhu suddenly felt a wave of irritability and anxiety, and he didn't know what he was thinking—maybe he was still drinking—suddenly, he took off his woolen coat and wiped it on Xu Budie's face and body. .

Xu Budie seemed to have slowed down a bit, holding his clothes with a dazed expression, very innocent, if it wasn't for the smell of alcohol mixed with the disgusting smell of vomiting, it would look as if nothing had happened.

Cheng Zhu suppressed his emotions in frustration, called a car for him, and put him in it. "You go back, go back to sleep and we'll talk when we wake up." He told the driver his address and gave the money in advance, but he didn't sit on it.

Although the weather has gotten warmer, the temperature drops sharply at night, and it is still freezing cold without a coat, but the cold makes people sober. He just wants to go for a walk... Forget all the things and all the words just now, You don't need to worry about other people's psychology and emotions, just walk around by yourself.

But after walking for a while, I always felt that something was wrong. When I turned around, I found that Xu Budie got out of the car at some point, and followed far behind, biting his leash like a lost puppy. He was very confused. He was still holding Cheng Zhu's coat.

Cheng Zhu could only stop: "Didn't I tell you to go back first?" He also knew that his tone was not very good.

"But..." Xu Budie was still in a daze, in a state of hangover relaxation mixed with tension and anxiety. He vaguely felt that something was wrong. He recovered, but alcohol hindered the normal thinking of the brain, and the scenery seen by the eyes became shaky and hazy as if several layers of filters had been added. Everything became very slow, and he could only act on instinct. "I...you don't wear a coat...it will be cold."

"The coat is dirty and I don't want to wear it anymore."

"...Oh...then..." He hurried up a few steps, hesitated, and wanted to shake his hand; but in vain, Cheng Zhu walked even faster, and he could only stumble behind But when he really couldn't catch up and had to stop to spit out the last drop of acid in his stomach, although Cheng Zhu didn't come to take care of him, he finally stopped far away.

The two of them maintained such a distance, and actually walked intermittently for more than an hour on the gradually deserted street...and vomited until Xu Budie had nothing to vomit, emptying his stomach and blowing enough cold wind, People finally began to wake up gradually.

Countless times on the way, a certain corner, a certain seat, a certain tree made him want to lean against it very much, just stay there motionless and close his eyes, maybe he will fall asleep like countless drunks on the street.But a sense of fear and vigilance that might be engrained in his bones made him unable to sleep in public anymore, and Cheng Zhu was always not far in front, leaving behind a back that he could catch up with if he chased him.

But after the alcohol faded, my body was frozen stiff, and gradually warmed up with the unstoppable footsteps, sweating from the soles of my feet, and gradually had a splitting headache, remembering what I said like crazy Some fragments... I can't wait to find a crack in the ground to get in.

Only then did he realize that they were not walking in the direction of home, the surrounding environment became more and more remote, and the surrounding buildings became sparse, and he could see the contiguous factory buildings of the industrial park, where Cheng Zhu's studio was located.

Xu Budie stepped up to follow, saw that he didn't go in through the main entrance, opened the rolling gate of the warehouse, and a light lit up in the row of identical boxes.Cheng Zhu found a cardboard box among the messy goods, sat on it and stopped moving.

The goods in the warehouse are messy and full.Xu Budie walked in carefully. Some boxes were packed but then unpacked, some were only half-baked, and some shelves were dismantled. aisle.When passing through, those abstract or figurative faces and figures almost rubbed shoulders, hooked the collar, turned around, and the huge eyeballs just stared at the tip of the nose.

Cheng Zhu wasn't very surprised when he saw him coming, but he couldn't maintain any expression. He looked around blankly, trying to grab some tissues for him but couldn't find them, so he finally picked up a pile of messy paper towels on the table. All the papers were gathered together and handed to him: "Are you sober? Wipe your clothes and so on."

Xu Budie took it, and looked at it as if it were some used slips, with a return slip written on the top line.

Enduring his headache, he asked cautiously, "Old Cheng...are you angry?...I...I shouldn't be drinking so much..."

"It's none of your business, it's my own annoyance. I told you to go back and you didn't come back..." Cheng Zhu took a breath, "I just want to wait by myself."

"But……"

"But what, you're not wrong, it's a good thing to be able to say it, and feel better." He smiled and wanted to touch a cigarette, but there was a big no-smoking sign on the warehouse, "I can also know that you Look at me that way."

Xu Bu opened his mouth, he vaguely recalled what he said, and his headache continued: "I'm not... I'm just talking nonsense when I'm drunk, Cheng Zhu!"

Cheng Zhu ignored his rebuttal, turned around, and lifted the wrapping paper against the wall behind him, revealing the sculpture. Speaking of which, since it was only a first draft, this work has not yet been named.

It was also the first time for Xu Budie to seriously examine this work based on him.Amid the shadows cast by many other colossal works, the slightly larger-than-life bronze figure still looks fragile and small surrounded by it.

"Broken beauty, huh?" His tone was not very fluctuating, but he sounded very aggrieved. "Do you think that we will be together because I, an artist, like to pursue the 'broken beauty'? I didn't respond to you at the beginning because you were not 'broken' enough at that time?"

"...Cheng Zhu, don't be like this...I just drank too much..."

"I'm a fucking picker. Is it broken all day long?" Cheng Zhu laughed, and his laughter was quite broken, which caused Xu Budie's heart to throb violently, "Why, I'll wait You are broken, and finally found your beauty, fell in love with you, picked it up and used it as a model to appreciate and satisfy my creative desire? This is our relationship? Then what is the difference between me and Gan and Yu?!"

"No...I'm talking nonsense, I'm talking nonsense! Because Jingzi doesn't know anything, I just want to make him angry...I'm not talking about you!"

"What you said before is true. I can hear it...you never told me, and I never asked for you...I know you have been buried for a long time, and it is only with this strength that you can vent everything in one go Come out. Then this sentence becomes false? You have already won the Oscar so freely, why are you giving me takeaway..."

Xu Budie was completely anxious: "Cheng Zhu, I really didn't mean that! Do you really want to dig into a dead end?"

"Am I digging into a dead end!" Cheng Zhu couldn't help but burst out, and he gradually said, "Haven't we encountered enough problems? Haven't I done enough for you? It triggered so many chain reactions Isn’t that enough? What else can I do to prove my determination to you—to prove that we can be together, not because I am your teacher, not because some young people don’t like you! I don’t want teaching positions or competitions for you. No more, no more wives and children..."

Xu Budie only felt his head explode, trembling with anger, and tears couldn't stop streaming down: "You are too much Cheng Zhu, you are too much...Did I ask you to do this for me? I asked you to do this for me. Did you resign and let you argue for me?! Your wife and children are even more ridiculous, did I make you divorce! Am I the third party!? As for the children..." He suddenly opened his eyes wide and was caught Eyes misty with tears, "... Isn't Lele... Wait, are you going to give up custody...? Have you talked to Rong Wanqin? When and why?... No, no! Lele can't It's absolutely impossible for him to go to such a strange place overseas just with his mother! You can't do this!"

"Why... because I want to be with you, is it difficult to understand?... Yes, maybe it is difficult for others to understand... Rong Wanqin thinks I am crazy, not her, because I am actually Seriously... Anyone else can ask, and they can say anything! But why do you ask me like that? Have you really considered my situation? Do you think the court will award the child to a child who is being compared with yourself? A man who is 15 years younger than a boy in love!" Cheng Zhu's eyes were red, and there was a circle of faint water marks under his eye sockets.I don't know when the tears slipped by and how they disappeared.

"I love people, not statues..." he murmured, "I love people too, not statues..."

I will also be tired, hurt, injured, collapsed, unable to hold on, and unable to maintain the last bit of pretentious maturity. up?

He suddenly picked up the impact hammer placed in the corner of the warehouse, raised the head of the hammer, and slammed it at the work that he was most proud of and caused the most trouble for him so far.