Turns Out I'm Crazy

The weather was fine on the day Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang were buried.

Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei drove to the cemetery early in the morning. After picking up the urn from the depository, they carried them to the designated cemetery.

The names and photos of Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang are engraved on the stone tombstone.

The staff from the cemetery came over and put Yancha rice beans in the tombstone, and then put some soil into it to cover it thinly.

The man said to Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei, "Put the urn in."

Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei were holding an urn, Chen Qianqing was holding Liu Huamei's, and Lu Zhengfei was holding Chen Qingyang's.Originally, Chen Qingyun asked if she needed to come and help, but Chen Qianqing refused.

So at this time, there were only two people standing in front of the tombstones of Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang.

Chen Qianqing bent down and put the urn in. He looked a little dazed, watching Lu Zhengfei put Chen Qingyang's urn next to Liu Huamei.

The staff member said: "The relatives go grab three handfuls of soil and cover them on their urns. This is a blessing for future generations."

Chen Qianqing grabbed three handfuls of soil and put them on the urns of Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang.

Lu Zhengfei stood still, and the staff gave him a strange look: "Aren't you a family member?"

Lu Zhengfei smiled bitterly: "I think so."

Chen Qianqing hung his head and said nothing. After someone came to seal the tombstone with cement, he took out a white towel from his bag and wiped off the dust on the tombstone bit by bit.

Lu Zhengfei squatted down and placed some tributes and a bunch of white chrysanthemums in front of the tombstones of Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang.

After finishing all this, Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei burned the clothes belonging to Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang at the place where the paper money was burned.

Liu Huamei believed in Christianity, so she could not burn paper money, let alone incense. Chen Qianqing was in a trance watching their clothes burn to ashes in the fire.

Lu Zhengfei quietly held Chen Qianqing's hand.

Chen Qianqing said: "Let's go."

Lu Zhengfei hummed, took Chen Qianqing's hand and walked forward slowly.

Sitting in the co-pilot, Chen Qianqing felt as if he was going to collapse. He gasped slightly, then closed his eyes and fell asleep.

Lu Zhengfei started the car and took Chen Qianqing out of the cemetery.

Everything seems to have passed.But Lu Zhengfei became more and more worried about this person beside him, for no other reason—Chen Qianqing was too calm.Except for the gaffe on the first day, he didn't even shed tears, and his face was so dull that people didn't know what he was thinking.

Coupled with his worrying mental state, Lu Zhengfei didn't know how to comfort Chen Qianqing.

Crying is a way to express sadness, but when you are so sad, you can't even cry.

Lu Zhengfei had never tasted this kind of taste, so facing Chen Qianqing's reaction, he had no way of guessing what Chen Qianqing was thinking.

Once the funeral is over, it's time to start dealing with other things.

Chen Qianqing was not worried about the compensation for the family members of the driver who caused the accident. He knew that Lu Zhengfei would handle this kind of matter very easily after he came forward.

Sure enough, the day after Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang were buried, Lu Zhengfei gave the compensation to Chen Qianqing.

80, two lives, not even as much pocket money as Lu Zhengfei gave him, Chen Qianqing just felt ironic with the money.

The 80 yuan is nothing to Chen Qianqing, but it is very attractive to ordinary families.

When Chen Qianqing packed her luggage and was about to go to school in city a, Chen Qingyu found him.

Chen Qingyu came to Chen Qianqing's house alone with some fruits.

Chen Qianqing looked at Chen Qianqing coldly, her expression was full of irony.

Chen Qingyu felt a little guilty when she was stared at by Chen Qianqing, but she glanced at Lu Zhengfei and seemed to gain courage, she said: "Qianqing, before your father left, he had already agreed with me that he would... sell that house Give us a home."

As she spoke, she took out an agreement from her pocket, with Chen Qingyang's signature on it.

Chen Qianqing glanced at the agreement and raised her eyes: "Do you want that house?"

Chen Qingyu said: "It's not that my aunt wants to take advantage of you, Qianqing, I really can't do anything with Xiaohui as a woman... You see, your father is gone too, so you can fulfill his last wish."

Chen Qianqing looked at Chen Qingyu, and suddenly felt that the real Chen Qianqing was imprisoned by him in her previous life, and it might be a good thing that she didn't see Chen Qingyu's face.Because until his death, the original Chen Qianqing felt that he had a family who loved him and loved his relatives.

Chen Qianqing said: "What if I disagree."

Chen Qingyu sighed, and glanced at Lu Zhengfei who was sitting beside Chen Qianqing who was silent: "Your parents didn't know about you and Xiao Lu before they died, right?"

Chen Qianqing said: "You know?"

Chen Qingyu said: "Men like men. I don't want to talk about you, aunt, but if other people find out, what will they think of you? What do they think of your father and mother?"

However, Chen Qianqing's next move was to slowly tear up the agreement that Chen Qingyu showed him. While tearing it up, he said, "Chen Qingyu, you can try it, but I guarantee you will regret it."

Chen Qingyu's face turned pale with anger from Chen Qianqing's actions, and she said, "Tear it up, it was originally an attachment!"

Chen Qianqing didn't want to spend effort on this, he said: "Lu Zhengfei, you can figure it out."

Lu Zhengfei looked at Chen Qingyu as if he was looking at a dead person.

Chen Qingyu carried her bag and left while scolding. She was not stupid, and she could see that Lu Zhengfei was not a man to be trifled with.

Chen Qianqing said, "Go back to school."

Lu Zhengfei reached out and hugged Chen Qianqing.

Because of this incident, Chen Qianqing went to school more than ten days late.But after asking about his absence, the head teacher graciously gave him a vacation and told him that he would greet the school office.

Chen Qianqing arrived at school, put her luggage at Lu Zhengfei's house, and then went to the rental house first.

Zhu Mao has been at school for more than ten days, and he also called Chen Qianqing during the period, so he naturally knew what happened at Chen Qianqing's house.

When Chen Qianqing walked in, he was changing sawdust for his little hamster Tuotou. When he looked up, he saw Chen Qianqing with an expressionless face. Zhu Mao said: "Qianqing, you are back."

Chen Qianqing hummed, and reached out to touch the fat that was about to turn into a lump.

Zhu Mao opened his mouth, wanting to say something to comfort Chen Qianqing, but he couldn't say it when he reached his mouth, and after a long time, he said: "Qianqing, don't be too sad."

Chen Qianqing nodded.

Compared with before the holiday, Chen Qianqing lost weight again.His face was unreasonably pale, with slightly long hair and delicate eyebrows, he looked like an unpopular doll.

Zhu Mao felt uncomfortable seeing Chen Qianqing like this, and he gave Chen Qianqing a big hug.

Chen Qianqing said slowly: "I may not go to school anymore."

Zhu Mao was taken aback: "Why don't you go to school?"

Chen Qianqing said, "Because I'm sick."

Zhu Mao was startled and said, "Qianqing, what's wrong with you?"

Chen Qianqing said: "It's a disease that can't be cured." He felt that he was going crazy.

Countless memories and voices entangled him, making him sleepless. The calmness he showed was almost an illusion, and he didn't even know when he would completely collapse.

When Zhu Mao heard what Chen Qianqing said, his first reaction was cancer. He said, "Qianqing, don't give up! My grandfather also got cancer, but he lived for many years."

Chen Qianqing laughed loudly, and said, "Idiot, I lied to you."

Zhu Mao looked at Chen Qianqing suspiciously, as if he didn't quite believe his words.

Chen Qianqing said: "I'll come back to see you... I'll leave in a while, I'll pay the rent, don't worry, maybe I'll come back later."

Zhu Mao said: "Don't! If you leave, I will go back to live in the dormitory! Xiaohua is gone...Qianqing, will you really come back?"

Chen Qianqing said: "Who knows." He didn't know whether he could return to a normal life.

Lu Zhengfei has been waiting for Chen Qianqing outside the door, he said: "Qianqing, you really don't want to go to school?"

In the past, he was the one who kept Chen Qianqing from going to school, but now he begged Chen Qianqing to go to school.

Chen Qianqing said: "I can't do it." There is nothing to do, he has never been Chen Qianqing, nor can he become Chen Qianqing.He's been a poor impersonator throughout.

Lu Zhengfei said: "I asked someone to go through the formalities for your suspension of school...you see when you want..." He didn't make it clear what happened next, but both Chen Qianqing and Lu Zhengfei knew what it meant.

Chen Qianqing said: "As soon as possible." According to his plan, he should have agreed to Han Huaiyun's proposal, but after Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang died, he decided to let nature take its course.

Whether it's Lu Zhengfei, the deaths of Liu Huamei and Chen Qingyang, or his future fate according to the established trajectory, he has to bear it one by one.

Because these are all what he deserves.

Rebirth may not mean change, but just means that you have to swallow these sufferings as they are.

After returning to Lu Zhengfei's residence, Xiao Hua who didn't know where to go suddenly appeared. Chen Qianqing looked at Xiao Hua who was meowing at his feet, with a kind of indifference in his eyes that made people palpitate.

It was as if the cute little life in front of him could no longer arouse his interest, no matter how cute it was, it had nothing to do with him.

It's a feeling of being cut off from the whole world.

Lu Zhengfei said: "Little flowers grow really fast."

Chen Qianqing glanced at Lu Zhengfei calmly, and that look sent Lu Zhengfei's back chills - until then, he finally discovered that Chen Qianqing's condition was so serious that he couldn't wait.

Because in those eyes that should be full of life, there is a dead silence that cannot be ignored. He is clearly looking at you, but you will feel that his eyes have wandered away and scattered to unknown directions.

Lu Zhengfei knew that he couldn't delay any longer, he said: "Qianqing, let's see a doctor right away."

Chen Qianqing turned her head, said nothing, and slowly closed her eyes.