I Just Came to Borrow a Light

Lin Chengbu only felt that he was sweating all over in today's really not hot weather, and the clothes on his back were soaked. He didn't know whether it was cold sweat or sweat from a rush.

After the worker finished speaking, he clicked tut tut: "You are his friend, isn't he out of his mind?"

Lin Chengbu didn't speak, another worker took over the conversation: "It's okay to look at it normally, just talk less."

"That's right, don't you usually chat with us when you come to the toilet, it doesn't seem like there is a problem," the worker looked in the direction of the Yuanwu boat, "Did you get stimulated by something? Or...bewitched ?”

The idiot slapped him and waved his hands.

"I just said something casually," said the worker, "I think he is very strange."

"Thank you." Lin Chengbu touched his body, he didn't even have a pack of cigarettes, so he had to take out his wallet, "Thanks to you..."

"Hey!" The worker quickly pushed his hand away when he saw him taking the wallet, "Don't take the money, it's unnecessary, let alone the neighbors who have been around for so long, even if they don't know each other, we will save them. It is a rule for people on board to save lives."

The fool also pushed him, motioning him to go back to Yuan Wu's boat.

"Go back," another worker said, "he still choked on the water, and then fell asleep without saying a word. You go and watch it, so that nothing happens when you wake up."

Lin Chengbu returned to Yuanwu's boat, and gave the idiot the cigarettes on his body. The idiot patted him on the shoulder and gestured again. up.

"Thank you," he said.

After the idiot left, he went to the window and looked in. Yuan Wu was still lying in the same position.

He hesitated for a while, then gently pushed open the hatch, walked in, and sat down beside Yuan Wu.

After staring at Yuan Wu for a few minutes, he really couldn't hold back, and reached out to touch under Yuan Wu's nose, and then retracted his hand after he felt breathing.

"Why are you?" Lin Chengbu looked at Yuan Wu and said softly, "You always ask why, why are you... I want to ask now, why are you?"

Yuan Wu seemed to be in a deep sleep, so of course it was impossible to answer him.

He didn't expect Yuan Wu to answer either, he almost didn't dare to take any action in front of Yuan Wu, when he heard the workers' words, for a moment he even hoped that Yuan Wu could return to the previous state.

Seriously live the life you have now, don't make any changes, maybe you won't be surprised.

But is it really possible?

Lin Chengbu looked at Yuan Wu's tightly closed eyes. If there was no external force, would Yuan Wu really be like this for the rest of his life?

No way.

When he talked about Yuan Wu's state with Jiang Chengyu before, he said that he was afraid that Yuan Wu would live like this for the rest of his life, Jiang Chengyu laughed.

"You are too naive, nothing will stay the same forever, even if you think nothing has changed, time is always changing, every minute and every second is different."

This was the only time he felt that Jiang Chengyu's statement that he graduated from the Department of Philosophy might be true.

What happened to Yuan Wu?

Lin Chengbu had always known that he had serious mental problems, but he never thought that he would commit suicide suddenly.

Is it suicide?

Lin Chengbu frowned.

He couldn't imagine how Yuan Wu dived into the water and never let go while holding onto a handful of aquatic plants.

Thinking of such a description after calming down now, he suddenly felt chills.

The chill penetrated into the bones a little bit.

aquatic plants.

asphyxia.

Fatal attraction from water.

These contents appear repeatedly in Xing Tian's stories, and they are different every time.

But what frightened him deeply was the last story.

The last story that Yuan Wu has not yet written.

Lin Chengbu began to have difficulty breathing, he moved gently to the small table next to him, and brought Yuan Wu's notebook over.

The laptop was turned on, and when the screen lit up, Lin Chengbu saw the unclosed document.

"The final decision is still the original decision, nothing has changed, he went around in a big circle, and finally returned to the starting point...

What we are looking for, what we are running from, no one can tell...

The roads to the end look different, but the end is always silent...

Those questions about myself, whether noisy or silent, with answers or without answers, no one will remember in the end...

He sat on the bow of the boat, with the cool water under his feet, circling around, dancing lightly, and leaving...

Down is the answer?No one knows, but there will never be an answer here, leave the place he can't leave, go to a place he doesn't know if he can reach...

He went down, and down, until he couldn't go any further...

Here it is, without looking back, he reaches out and grabs those green elves that are stretching, jumping, and looking happy..."

Lin Chengbu closed the notebook, feeling out of breath, and after taking several deep breaths, he gently took Yuan Wu's cigarettes to the stern of the boat.

The air in Shenqiao was still so good, the cool air with the smell of water poured into his lungs, and his breathing finally calmed down.

He has read all these stories, but when he reads them again today, the feeling is completely different.

Yuan Wu didn't know what kind of mood he was in when he wrote these words, what kind of feeling would make him regard this story as an operation manual.

The phone rang in his pocket, it was a message from Jiang Chengyu.

-what's the situation?

- I can't tell you the specific words, I jumped into the river, I'm fine now, I'm sleeping

-sleep?you are still him

-he

- Sure enough, I have the demeanor of the best bartender on the 18th, please contact me if you have anything to do

-good

Putting the phone aside, Lin Chengbu leaned on the deck of the boat, took a cigarette from Yuan Wu's cigarette case, and held it in his mouth without lighting it.

Every time Yuan Wu stays here and looks at the water, what is he thinking?

Lin Chengbu didn't know, and couldn't understand, since he was a child, he basically didn't keep anything in his heart for too long, he didn't like to think about things, he wasn't sensitive, and even troubled many people. Sexual orientation, he didn't think much about it.

Maybe it's heredity, when I told my parents, they just sort of dealt with it like a fight with him in a daze.

But for him like this, he happened to meet someone like Yuan Wu.

He knows Yuan Wu very well, he knows what he likes to eat and drink, what he wears and listens to, his birthday, his address, his height and weight, if he didn't dare to follow Yuan Wu when he went to the toilet , he even knows the size of Yuan Wu, just so shameless.

But he also doesn't know Yuan Wu very well, he doesn't know the environment he grew up in, what he thinks in his heart, what is really annoying him, why he sometimes has a bad temper, and he doesn't know that he is indifferent and anxious What's behind it.

Maybe he will know it slowly, just like he looked at Yuan Wu in confusion for so long and suddenly found that Yuan Wu did not lose his memory, nor did he persistently want some stories to appear where they should appear in their original state ...

Lin Chengbu never dared to really think about this, he didn't know how to face Yuan Wu who was no longer Yuan Wu.

There was a sound from the rear cabin door, and before Lin Chengbu could turn his head, Yuan Wu had already seen Yuan Wu coming out of the cabin from the corner of his eyes.

"You..." Lin Chengbu jumped up, and dropped his cigarette on the board of the boat, "Are you awake?"

"Well," Yuan Wu glanced at him, bent down to pick up the cigarette, and put it in his mouth, "Why are you here?"

"I'll... have a look at you," Lin Chengbu took out a lighter and put it in front of Yuan Wu's eyes, looking at his still wet hair, "I don't go to work today."

"Is there anything to eat?" Yuan Wu moved forward and lit a cigarette, "I'm hungry, I feel hungry when I see you."

"Have a snack, do you want to have a snack and I'll make you something else?" Lin Chengbu said.

"Snacks are fine," Yuan Wu glanced at him, "You look really bad, didn't you sleep well?"

"One night was all a mess of dreams." Lin Chengbu turned around and realized that all the dishes and food were in the car, "Then what...the snacks are in the car, I forgot to bring them."

"Go get it." Yuan Wu said.

to get it?

It's so simple!

cannot!dare not!If you walk away, who knows if you will plunge into the water and grab the aquatic plants without letting go!

Lin Chengbu stared at him for a while: "You accompany me to get it."

Yuan Wu looked at him with the eyes of the second fool: "From here to the pier, there are a total of 27 boats. It takes 5 minutes to walk there and 5 minutes to walk back. Even the big heads come and go like the wind. You need me to accompany you." ?”

"Yes," Lin Chengbu nodded, "I'm... afraid."

Yuan Wu saw that he didn't speak, and after a while, he sprayed a small bunch of smoke on him: "Did you fall into the water again when you just came here?"

"No," Lin Chengbu bit his lips, "you stay with me."

"Why?" Yuan Wu probably felt a little baffled.

"Because..." Lin Chengbu wanted to say that I am your boyfriend, but he didn't dare to say it out. He didn't know whether Yuan Wu's incident today had anything to do with him taking advantage yesterday, "Because you're hungry."

Yuan Wu continued to look at him, and gave him a thumbs up after a long time: "This reason is absolutely impeccable."

Lin Chengbu followed Yuan Wu to the pier. Halfway through, he saw the big head who was still counting ants lonely on the pier.

He suddenly became nervous, he was afraid that the big head would excitedly ask about the past when he saw Yuan Wu, but now Yuan Wu didn't say a word about it, Lin Chengbu couldn't judge whether he forgot or didn't say anything, I don't know how he will react when he hears from the big head.

He could only suddenly jump in front of Yuan Wu savagely, and walked quickly to the pier.

"Am I hungry or are you hungry..." Yuan Wu said behind him.

Lin Chengbu didn't bother to answer, and jumped onto the pier directly. The big head was already standing on the side of the pier and was about to speak. He quickly pinched the big head's face: "Don't ask Brother Xiaowu for a while, do you know what happened in the morning? He doesn't want to Speaking of this, if you ask him, he will be sad, understand?"

The big head was pinched by him, and he just let go, and he let go before adding: "Understood."

"You're so smart, you're going to make big things in the future." Lin Chengbu patted him on the head.

"Uncle," Dabao called out leaning on Lin Chengbu's leg, "Good morning!"

"Morning," Yuan Wu jumped onto the pier, "Would you like some snacks?"

"Eat!" Big Head replied immediately.

Lin Chengbu walked to the car with some uneasiness, and listened to their conversation with his ears pricked up when he opened the car door to get something.

But the big head is really reliable, he didn't ask about the morning, and focused all his attention on the snacks.

Lin Chengbu took a bag of small bread and a bag of small cakes for him to choose, and the big head picked out the small cakes: "I just want one, I don't need such a big bag, I can't finish it."

"Okay." Lin Chengbu tore open the bag and gave him one.

Datou took a bite of the cake, raised his head and was about to speak, when a fucking voice came from the boat in front of him: "Datou—come back for breakfast!"

"Oh—" Datou responded, turned around and waved at them, jumped onto the boat, and ran towards his own boat, "I'm going to eat breakfast!"

Datou's mother stood at the bow of the boat and looked towards the pier for a while, Lin Chengbu nodded at her, and then walked back together with Yuan Wu.

"When did you come?" Yuan Wu asked.

"It's been a while," Lin Chengbu said, "You were sleeping when you came."

"Oh," Yuan Wu responded, walked a few steps forward and then turned around, "You said you are my boyfriend?"

Lin Chengbu was taken aback by this sudden question, but in order to maintain consistency, he snorted vaguely.

"Why didn't you tell me when you came here?" Yuan Wu continued to walk forward.

"I...don't dare." What Lin Chengbu said was the truth, he really didn't dare.

Yuan Wu didn't ask any more questions, and when he got back to the boat, he took a can of Coke and sat down at the stern, reaching out for two small buns to eat.

"Is there nothing else to drink? Milk or something, don't you use milk to froth your milk," Lin Chengbu said, "Don't drink Coke early in the morning."

"It's gone. I didn't seem to sleep last night. I drank a few cups of coffee and frothed all the milk." Yuan Wu said.

"You...didn't sleep?" Lin Chengbu squatted down beside him, "It seems?"

"Well," Yuan Wu took a bite of the bread, "Sometimes I can't tell if I'm dreaming or awake."

Lin Chengbu didn't say a word, thinking of Yuan Wu squatting at the stern of the boat crying bitterly, it was just that one time, or it was like that often.

I don't know, but when I think about it, I feel that Yuan Wu is very helpless.

If he didn't find Yuan Wu, then would this Yuan Wu always be like this, crying alone in the middle of the rainy night...

"Have you read my novel?" Yuan Wu asked.

"I've seen it, I've seen some of it," Lin Chengbu recalled, thought for a while and then added, "I'm not your reader, and I don't want your autographed book."

"Yes, you have read it," Yuan Wu thought for a while, "You can still tell the content."

"...Well." Lin Chengbu found that Yuan Wu had ignored the fact that the chapter hadn't been posted on the Internet when he said the content.

"Did you ever say," Yuan Wu took a sip of Coke, "you are sick?"

"I didn't say it, you said I was sick," Lin Chengbu said, "I mean... I'm a ghost."

"Well, I remembered." Yuan Wu looked calm, took a bite of bread and turned to look at him, "Why do you want me to send away the ghost in front of you?"

"I..." Lin Chengbu closed his eyes and took a breath, "I want you to find the past, my past."

"That's it." Yuan Wu lowered his head and stuffed the remaining bread into his mouth, staring at the Coke on the board and didn't speak again.

Lin Chengbu looked at his profile, not sure if this unusually calm person in front of him was actually Yuan Wu.

His demeanor and way of speaking are familiar to him, cold and calm, he doesn't seem to be surprised or curious about anything, but the content of his speech is still the same as before.

"Is the past important?" Yuan Wu asked.

"Important," Lin Chengbu looked at him, "very important."

"For you?" Yuan Wu glanced at him.

"It's the same for you. People live a lifetime and don't ask for anything else. At least they must remember themselves." Lin Chengbu said.

Yuan Wu picked up the Coke can and raised it at him: "It makes sense."

A long silence followed, Yuan Wu stopped talking, Lin Chengbu didn't know what to say, so he took a piece of bread and gnawed silently.

"My novel," Yuan Wu said after eating three pieces of bread, "is almost finished."

"So fast?" Lin Chengbu asked.

Yuan Wu's words made him nervous. The novel is not almost finished. Compared with Xing Tian's previous novels, this one is at most one-third written, and it's just the first story of the novel.

But Yuan Wu said that it was almost finished.

Lin Chengbu knew why it was almost finished, because there was nothing left behind, and all the stories, whether they were written or not, were all here.

"Well," Yuan Wu said, "I can't write anymore... The editor is going to kill me with a knife. This must be considered unfinished."

"If you can't keep writing, you won't write," Lin Chengbu said, "How comfortable it is, there are so many unfinished ones, and the editor will cut them down one by one until next year before it's your turn."

Yuan Wu looked at him for a while and suddenly laughed.

This smile is very happy, Lin Chengbu can see that Yuan Wu is relaxed now, and he is also slightly relieved.

"There are still two chapters to the end," Yuan Wu said, "I have already set a time, and I will update it when the time comes."

"En." Lin Chengbu nodded.

"Go and try," Yuan Wu patted the bread crumbs on his hands, "I have time."

"Try what?" Lin Chengbu was stunned.

"Try to see if I can send you to reincarnation." Yuan Wu raised his head and drank the Coke, pinching the can, "Start with the first one."