[Main Wenye] Dazai-style happiness

Hidden killing intent.

[The child has a rebellious mentality, not against me, but more like against a form. He is very resistant to this kind of existence, and even that strong emotion is expressed by him, and he has no perception Under the circumstances, "Dazai Osamu" is called "ghost" and "divinity" in the port Mafia. On the one hand, he is very concerned about various things, and on the other hand, he is extremely ignorant. I can't even judge. Does his idea of ​​living belong to human beings' own desire to survive, or does he want to understand something more or has found a goal to survive.

However, "Osamu Dazai" has found a target, and it can even be regarded as one of the funniest fallacies of the year in Port Mafia. 】

On the screen, Xiu also shuttled among the bullets, gunpowder, swords and swords, blood and gunpowder smoke left a taste on his cuffs, and dirty and complicated events engraved traces on his heart, one after another, one piece at a time. Countless events, countless lives, countless injuries, countless lives hanging by a thread, countless conspiracies and tricks, countless times of manipulating the mind, countless times of lying... It is very clear that Xiu is also an evil flower that grows completely from blood and violence. flower.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke felt fishy sweetness welling up in his throat. That familiar look... belonged to a strong stroke in his memory that he could never forget. The pungent and blood-splattered smell was painful and boring, but it happened to be the bloody process of regaining the goal of living.

[Obviously has the ability to easily manipulate people's hearts, can completely control the other party's information with just a few words, and has never missed a negotiation scene...but it is always so quiet that it does not exist.

So, I was quite surprised that time. 】

Xiu also climbed onto the chair that belonged to the leader, and trapped [Mori Ogai] who was sitting in the office in this small chair area, and he rarely showed strong emotions.

As the angle of view moved, everyone couldn't see Shuya's expression covered by the black hair, they could only watch him helplessly grab [Mori Ogai]'s neck, intending to shout something and express something.

[Now that I think about it, my memory may have been biased. At that time, I only remembered that I was covered by a huge tinnitus, and the mechanical voice swallowed Dazai-kun’s words. Indistinct and hoarse roars like "control" and "wake up", I don't remember what I replied, and I don't know how Dazai-kun left the chief's office. The child's body was suddenly weak, and his eyes were filled with fragments of hope and despair, but they inexplicably reflected a crazy and silent light.]

[At that time, I had already decided to become a "martyr"... that child. 】

The screen changed again, and the black and red background color changed to fragile white and a very small amount of light and indifferent blue. [Mori Ogai] was wearing a white coat, and he was walking out with his gloves off. The glass door behind him It is slowly closing.

A frail arm covered with blue blood vessels seemed to want to catch up with the door, but in the end it just touched the cold glass. The hand knocked on the glass vigorously, but it still couldn't open the door, and was finally caught. Several other people in the same white coat forcibly pressed down.

The screen changed and turned into a horizontal video of the place, [Mori Ogai] calmly walked towards the exit of the white room, there was even a faint smile in the blood-colored pupils, and there was a thick glass door , Xiu was completely controlled by the three young men in white coats. He tried his best to maintain the posture of stretching his hands forward. His head was pressed, but he continued to raise his head with force. He looked at the figure that was getting further and further away, hoarse , almost screaming with a voice-damaging force——

——“[Mori Ogai] ——!!”

"Ah..." Fukuzawa Yukichi looked at his old opponent, and then at Shuya, who was struggling constantly but was easily suppressed on the screen. When he said the name forward, his fingers curled up, and he put his hand on it almost uncontrollably. The samurai sword on the waist.

"Tragedy." Dazai's kite-colored eyes showed obscure emotions, but the darkened warm pupils revealed a kind of creepy darkness. There was blood in his eyes, and his body was soaked in dirt that couldn't be washed clean. The stench of blood, even if it is covered with a false light called "the side that saves people", these times of overlapping violence and darkness cannot be forgotten just by "getting away". Now, the beast named "Osamu Dazai" Finally, the fragile barrier of flesh and blood was completely torn, and anger flowed through his veins, but reason still absolutely restrained him from doing anything out of the ordinary.

【I don't understand everything, but I think I do. I think it's worth sacrificing one person in exchange for a more stable and orderly good and evil...

Until the world collapses, until consciousness is clear, until the truth is learned, until seeing those two people...]

【Everything is just the result of my indulging in rotten dreams.

Dazai, you win. 】

The author has something to say: Dazai has guessed the truth of the original world a little bit, so he is angry.

【No wash [Mori Ogai]】

It is undeniable that [Mori Ogai] belonged to Kawakami Yuki’s party. I just want to write from a different perspective and write about [Mori Ogai]’s struggle (after all, it is [Mori Ogai], it is impossible to control it easily), write about it In the beginning, Shuya was a bit hopeful and impulsive. Even if he had [book], it would be really reckless (?) to directly tell [Mori Ogai] the so-called "truth". At that time, Shuya had just contacted [book] Bar.

When the world collapses in the end, the original world will of course wake up, think about the stupid things I did (×), and of course feel a little guilty in the end.

"You won" I actually wanted to say to Xiuya privately.

want to comment (whisper)

In addition, I will release it for four days on May [-]st, and I will update at least two chapters!Just Uncertain Time (Rose withered.JPG)

感谢在2020-04-2523:21:11~2020-05-0102:57:54期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

感谢灌溉营养液的小天使：藏辞127瓶；有苏27瓶；果茶20瓶；咿卟12瓶；南巷凉安、为野犬干杯、庸人勿扰ζ10瓶；风宁语、呵呵5瓶；云英3瓶；小玖、沉默的重土、繁花半里1瓶；

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!

☆、chapter37

"It's really... quite disgusting." Mori Ogai watched the screen go black, and when the screening ended, he suddenly said a word. He looked at the pitch-black screen, and he seemed to be able to recall the same voice as himself in his mind .

But no one answered him.

"Next is Mr. Shuya...?" Atsushi Nakajima felt as if he had swallowed a handful of gravel, his throat was so dry and swollen, every syllable he uttered seemed to be crying blood-like, painfully unbearable.

[Ah, do you want me to tell a story? 】

Xiu Ye's voice suddenly appeared on the screen, a little dull, as if he was talking to someone.

[Something I remember deeply...? 】

The voice paused.

【sure. 】

The screen lights up again.

[I once thought that there is no world that is more painful than living in this world. At first glance, it seems that only foggy gray occupies the eyes, crying, despair, poverty, struggle, human nature, terrible, really terrible. 】

The picture ranges from widows who survived the war, to people fighting each other, to scrambling for food in the slums, the color is gray, and with Xiu Ye's unwavering voice, it's like a hopeless hell.

【It was only later that we realized that the world is hopeless and hopeless, and we are the only ones who are forced to know the truth of the world. There is light in the cracks of the world, but it does not belong to me. 】

[The last thing I can remember with my poor memory is the kindness that others gave me from the fingers.

At the end of the war, when there were no mafia, no suits, no bandages, no wounds, no smell of blood, I remembered that the world is not necessarily all black, not necessarily all malicious, not necessarily hopeless, to see clearly It doesn't have to be just me. 】

[I remember that it was the reconstruction period after the [Dragon Head War], and there were still mixed people gathering in Yokohama, but ordinary people also started to continue their business to make ends meet. 】

Xiu also walked on the road, dressed in ordinary sportswear, the bandages on his eyes were removed and replaced with black eyepatch, his hair was too long to cover the dark light in his eyes, he looked like an ordinary person with injured eyes A normal autistic teenager.

[It’s just an eye injury. After all, broken arms and legs were common in Yokohama at that time. The eye injury can also be interpreted as being accidentally injured by Mafia. I tried my best to wash off the layer of blood called "killing" on my body. 】

"Ah, are you alright?" A clear girl's voice came from beside Xiu Ye, and Xiu Ye suddenly woke up from his own thoughts only to realize that it was nearly dusk.

【Ah, it doesn't look like it's been long since I just left the house. It's been at least a few hours, and I just sat there for an entire afternoon. 】

"It's okay." Xiu also lowered his head and answered the girl with a timid gesture.

"Aoi sauce~ Are you ready?" The older woman sitting in a wheelchair at the intersection called to this side.

"Ah, yes, Mom." The girl called Aoi bowed to Xiu Ye, then turned and walked towards the woman in the wheelchair over there.

Aoi bent down to the light chestnut-haired woman as if discussing these things. From Shuya's perspective, she could see the corners of the woman's slightly raised lips, with a gentleness like a breeze. Afterwards, Aoi carefully pushed the wheelchair Xiang Xiu also came here.

"Oh, I'm so young. Hello, I'm Aoi's mother, Rio. I'm sorry if my child has caused you trouble." The light chestnut-haired woman who called herself Rio still had a white cloth on her legs, and she raised her eyebrows. On the corner of his lips, he apologized equally and sincerely to Xiu Ye.

"No, there's no need." After Xiu Ye answered softly, he stopped talking. He lowered his head, trying to maintain his gloomy and timid "outsider setting".

A cluster of bright colors suddenly appeared in the field of vision full of dull colors. Xiu also raised his hand to slightly hold the small bunch of flowers, which were camellias. He hesitated for a long time before raising his eyes to look at the mother and daughter.

When it fell on the head, it was as soft as a cloud, and Shuya froze all of a sudden.

[Which organization is it?No, although the girl named Aoi walks lightly, it is absolutely certain that she is not a martial arts practitioner, and the woman named Rio has definitely disabled her legs, so...] the voice was interrupted before he could finish speaking.

"いい子だ, いい子だ (good boy, good boy), go home quickly. Although it is safe now, the current situation is destined to be turbulent, and one must work hard." With dark eyes, I saw a child who lived a very hard life, a child who could not cry and had to endure pain, "Tsubaki flower represents [hope] oh~"

【...Is this the mother?It's totally different from mine. 】

Xiu also let Rio rub his head silently, quietly and well-behaved.

Like a petted cat.

"Then, goodbye~" Aoi took out a few candies wrapped in colorful candy wrappers from her pocket, and put them in Xiuye's hands like coaxing a child.

Xiu also looked at their figures going away, and still sat stiffly on the public bench until the moon swayed up the treetops, and then left there with his frosty body.

[In the days without monitors and cameras, I don’t know how many times I humbled and longed for the bouquet of flowers, waiting for the hope that didn’t exist, until the bright red withered and turned into rotten fertilizer, until Candies can no longer be eaten, and the colorful packaging is no longer conspicuous.

Hope, doesn't it belong to me? 】

Watching Xiu Ye on the screen carefully protect the small bunch of camellia flowers, clenched the colorful wrapping paper in his hands many times, a soreness suddenly surged in everyone's heart, and the emotion tore the heart, making people feel like To shed tears.

[Each "prey" is equipped with a locator and a recording device to ensure that there will be no unexpected things (Kawakami Yuki).

In other words, life in Yokohama is under the eyeliner everywhere, and we have already fallen below, not to mention that [Natsume Soseki] has not been traced so far...]

"Ding" The cups collided together and made a crisp sound, and the ice cubes in the light brown transparent wine collided and made the same crisp sound. The scene changed suddenly again, and stopped in a small bar. Xiuya and [Saku Oda] ] Raise your glass.

"[Dazai], this is..." [Oda Saku] raised his head and took a sip of his wine, looking at the man in a suit and round glasses over there.

"Ah, [Ango Sakaguchi], the intelligence agent of Mafia at the port, is just a member of the Supernatural Secret Service Division. He was discovered, and then sent to me regularly to monitor me." Putting down the wine glass under his eyes, he said some incredible words softly and skillfully.

"Yes, ■■■ (Miss Yuki) issued an order like 'Okay Dazai is allowed to be killed on the spot if any abnormalities are discovered.'" [Ango Sakaguchi] pushed his glasses, hiding the light of inquiry in his eyes.

The screen began to jump again, and Xiu Ye's memory was very strange, fragmented like broken glass scattered on the ground.

"Oh, that's amazing." Xiu also sat with his body leaning against the wall, with one leg slightly bent, and from the perspective of everyone, he could see his hand that was impaled by a dagger and bleeding profusely.

[Probably because when I used "Disqualification in the World", I mostly reached out to touch objects or people, so it was regarded as using my hands to activate the ability, and I was directly nailed to prevent me from invalidating the ability. 】

Shuya looked at [Oda Saku] who was fighting fiercely but still refused to kill, and sighed.

【Will you be my companion? 】

【It's really hard to find a companion, and it's also difficult to live in this world, because you don't know who will stab you, and who is your last partner.

And who can be sure that the people around you are not hidden spies or assassins?

Like [Akutagawa Ryunosuke]. 】

"Wha...!" Akutagawa Ryunosuke forcefully squeezed out a word and swallowed it into his throat. Nakajima Atsushi looked at him with some trepidation, but in the end he just opened his mouth and didn't speak.

【It hurts……】

The sharp and white knife tip protruded from the abdomen, and the slightly viscous blood slid down the knife tip, dripping on the concrete floor and splashing a little bit of bright red flowers, and the white and flat lining was also stained a little bit. The color of the fishy smell, Xiu also took a few steps forward due to the impact, and coughed out a few mouthfuls of bloody breath.

[Sure enough, [Akutagawa Ryunosuke] first met ■■■ (Kawakami Yuki) and got in touch with her, it’s so annoying, forget it, [Akutagawa Ryunosuke] will damage his sharp knife sooner or later , but...it has nothing to do with me, does it? 】

"Mr. Shuya..." Ryunosuke Akutagawa coughed a few times, his face became paler, he clenched his fist silently, and finally released it weakly.

【After all, it is a newly established organization. It is normal to have some conflicts. The world has turned into the most disgusting appearance in front of my eyes. Coupled with the frequent failure of missions, it is inevitable that I will be a little impatient. 】

[Ranbu] Kneeling in the room where the paper was scattered, leaning forward to search for something many times, the paper is full of red crosses full of negative meaning, Xiu also stands quietly by the side, silent.

"Ah—no matter what time it is, I, I still can't understand! Why? Why ■■■(Kawakami Yuki) did this?" [Ranpo] broke down and shouted, he scratched himself The black hair under the cloak, the hood hanging precariously on [Ranbu]'s head, it only needs a slight movement to slip off.

【Ah, are you saying that my memory is very mixed? 】

Here it comes again... the feeling that Shuya seems to be talking to something.

[Because most of my memories are tragedies, no matter whether it is fighting with weapons, hand-to-hand combat or experiments, I guess no one wants to see it...]

But at this moment in reality, Xiu also opened his eyes, they were a pair of complete and beautiful kite-colored eyes, and the warm-toned pupils made Xiu Ye reveal a wonderful youthful air and warmth.

"Xiuya...!"

"Mr. Xiuya!"

"Are you okay, do you want some water?"

"Are you feeling unwell? Do you want to check it out?"

"..."

Xiu also lowered his eyelids, his crow-feather-like eyelashes trembled slightly, blurring the moist corners of his eyes.

"It's alright~"

The author has something to say: ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah I'm really really sorry! !I fell asleep last night woo woo woo update is a step late.

Well, that's it, May [-]st is over.

Crying, haw, why did I fall asleep ah woo woo woo...

感谢在2020-05-0102:57:54~2020-05-0406:20:58期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angels of irrigation nutrient solution: 3 bottles of Moshang Passerby; 2 bottles of fruit tea; 1 bottle of Qiuxi Rufeng;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!

☆、chapter38

*Past Shuya writing [Shuya] please note

-

Why are there no emotional ups and downs?Obviously it's me, it's the past, it's a companion.

Why stop?Why not read on?Why are you silent?

—Are you in pain or...doesn't matter?

Xiu also just continued to look at the materialized product of his own memory in front of him, and didn't say a word about the noise of [book], looking at his own memory, his complete memory, Xiu also remained silent, the emotions in his heart bubbling and bubbling, I don't know if it's the anger that was ripped open by the memory of the probe and the uncontrollable daze mixed together, and finally turned into stagnant water sinking in my heart.

It's okay, hiding emotions, closing thoughts, forgetting memories - I've been doing fine.

【My mother... I have a vague impression of her. I remember her way of seeking profit, her way of lying, her pretentious way, and her pretended meekness. , remembering how she was "tamed" and how indifferent she was.

I was taught by her, so naturally I developed an extremely vicious appearance, hypocritical, docile and indifferent, defrauding food and money from adults and children, and obtaining the chance of survival from powerful people...

—I was originally a villain. 】

[My mother is a lowly person even in the slums. Since I was born, I have been listening to the dirty voices every day and night, listening to sweet words like arsenic. I was chained outside the door by my mother like a dog. In the days of doing nothing all day long, I can also discern people's occupations, personalities and other details.

I don't know why my mother gave birth to me, obviously it won't do any good, I don't know if it's because of something, just a whim?Is it the special needs of the guests?Or her own scarce conscience? 】

【I look very similar to the owner of a certain big family, so I was taken back, and my mother had already cut off all the contact information of all the guests a few days in advance, and spent money to arrange things around.

She had expected it a long time ago, in order to climb up to her father.

And as my father's child, even if I am not a serious legitimate child, my father doesn't care. All he wants is an heir who can take over the family and be filial to him, so even if I am a humble illegitimate child, I will be accepted I went back to my father's house. 】

[Xiuya] on the screen followed the well-dressed woman with a fake but sweet and cute smile, and through the screen, the mechanically cold white light appeared in Xiu's eyes. The slight and shallow expression moved, and at the same time, those eyes seemed extremely empty.

[I was extremely qualified, and my mother was favored by it. After a few years, my mother became an upright headed mistress.

I just need to obey my mother’s words and smile, and obey my father’s orders, and I can have a happy family—with such a dream, I am probably the most stupid and ridiculous person in the world.

"You can never wake up a person who pretends to be asleep." I have forgotten where I saw it, and now it is probably me. I am willing to be chained by my parents and have my hands and feet broken. I am fascinated by this poppy-like stability, as long as It's what they expect... I'll do it. 】

【But I can't change anything. The emergence of supernatural powers destroyed everything. No, it should be said that it just shattered the fragile glass on the surface, revealing the dark and twisted inside. 】

The halo of white text wraps around the body of [Xiu Ye], and the dark but terrified faces of the parents are printed in the unclear text.

[I was kicked out as a matter of course, and started to wander alone. Even in the slums, I can live well...

...Yeah, very good. 】

[Xiu Ye], who was wearing worn-out clothes, had dust and blood on his face, the wound on his abdomen was still bleeding, and his exposed hands and feet were full of bruises and scratches.

It was so embarrassing, but at least he survived.Xiu also held the [book] in one hand, with a calm expression on his face.

〖Life is really hard. 〗The [book] that belongs to the "main world" sighed with unknown meaning, probably it was pity, Xiu also thought.

[Even if I was competing with dogs in the slums, laughing hypocritically and sweetly to defraud others of money, I have never killed anyone, but... this bottom line completely collapsed when my "friend" died.

The single-minded "friend" who has not yet received what I call "approval" is dead.

His body was pierced by icy metal, leaving behind a foul-smelling, viscous dark liquid, and my thin spider silk called "bottom line" broke. 】

[Xiuya] touched the cold metal stained with glaring blood, and then the "disqualification in the world" was triggered, and the young black-haired child caught the body of the so-called "friend".

"It's a metal-type supernatural power user." [Xiuya] lowered his head and couldn't see his expression clearly, but his tone was unusually calm, too calm, "Go to hell."

[Xiuya] gritted his teeth, his iris-colored eyes were full of black emotions, he murmured an unknown syllable in a low voice, and then his voice became louder and louder, with a nervous stubbornness.

He said, "Die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die..."

[I want to kill them, all of them! 】

〖Did it collapse? 〗The [book] held in Xiuye's hand asked quietly, 〖That is your friend, I really didn't expect it. 〗

"Not yet, it must have been arranged by the system, I hid him very well - all for [Dazai Osamu]'s assimilation rate." Xiu also spit out the system's information indifferently, with a brisk tone, but his eyes He didn't move away from the screen for a moment, "That child pestered me every day, saying that he wanted to live with me. He is more likely to please women, and he also lives in places outside the slums with a playful smile..."

〖It's not your fault either. 〗 [Book] is relatively calm, 〖Do you want to continue? 〗

"Go on." Xiu also turned the [book] to a page, and the bandage that had been removed from his right eye was tied to the boy's right hand, which was more like an ornament.

[Although there was a little mistake in the middle, it was still successful, but I became more and more confused about it.

I can hardly tell who I am, and after I lost control of my emotions, I got closer to that person, and my desire to survive became weaker and weaker. For a long time, I wandered around the area where that "friend" was active, cleaning up "garbage", like Like a ghost, the wild dog dragged its wounded body and lived in a chaotic state until it truly regained consciousness. 】

[Then the plot starts and continues.

Sure enough... There is no good price for making friends with something like me. 】

〖Skip for a while. 〗 [Book] Seeing that the situation was wrong, I turned a few pages by myself, but I didn't expect to turn to the end.

[Xiuya] fell down on the tiles of the church, blood flowing, as dazzling and gorgeous as that dead "friend".

【Is this world finally unbearable and starting to fall apart?

I'm tired, so... please allow me to step down from the show.

God, if you can still hear my hoarse and weak voice, please protect the actors I carefully selected... I don't care about the order of good and evil anymore, please let [Ranpo] [Chuya] survive, let everything Let it all go back to the way it was, I can, promise everything. 】

〖But there is no god in your world, it is not even your original world. 〗 [Book] still hasn’t changed much, 〖The wish has been granted in vain. 〗

〖And your time to live is really short. 〗[Book] turned back a few pages independently, but it was blank as expected.

"No, it's still useful." Xiu also laughed sullenly, "At least it didn't let extra rats disrupt my plan, nor did the government's [hound dogs] and the white tiger far away in the orphanage break the schedule... It's already very good." Xiu also closed his eyes, and when he opened it again, it was still clear, and he emphasized again, "It's already very good."

〖Living is really hard. 〗[Book] flew up from Xiuya's hand and floated in mid-air. Black characters emerged from the book with gold patterns on a white background, surrounding Xiuya and [Book], creating the appearance of a strange power attack.

〖Come on, make a choice, [Erasure of the existence named "Dazai Shuya"] is inevitable, let's start choosing. 〗[Book] is judging, like a majestic god.

"Then..." Xiu didn't finish.

〖Give you some time to think about it, I will come to you by myself later. 〗[Book] interrupted the decision that Xiu Ye was about to blurt out, and threw him out of the fantasy world.

----

But the six people in the main world came out with complicated emotions after reading and screening their memories. When they saw Xiu Ye who was surrounded by everyone and sipping water, he hesitated for a while and dared not go forward.

"Cough cough, Mr. Nakaya?" Akutagawa Ryunosuke coughed a few times with one hand clenched in front of him, and saw Nakahara Nakaya, who had been silent since he entered the memory, walking straight towards Shuya.

"Why?" Nakahara Chuya said with a slightly puzzled expression, he pulled the corners of his mouth, but found that he couldn't laugh at all, "Why did you do this?" Abandoning yourself, ignoring yourself, giving up yourself, just like that When he was recuperating at the port of Mafia, when the weather was cool and it was snowing, he ran out of the medical room wearing thin clothes, not caring about the extent of his health.

Nakahara Chuya squatted down and looked at the half-lying Xiu Ye at the same level, and the brown-haired cadre and the black-haired boy looked at each other.

Xiu Ye followed his strength and looked at Chuya Zhongyuan, and crashed into a pure blue sea without accident.

"Try to survive... we're together."

Nakahara looked at Shuya whose pupils narrowed slightly, and raised the corners of his mouth, naturally making a gentle smile.

"It's okay, even if it's more like that mackerel." Nakahara Nakaya ignored Dazai Osamu's large-scale taunt gradually, took off the black gloves on his hand, and rubbed the black-haired boy's head tentatively, "The body should be fast You've recovered, and you can see with your eyes, when spring comes, do you want to go see the cherry blossoms together?"

"...Okay." Xiu Ye was still not used to this kind of intimate and gentle attitude, after a long silence, Zhongyuan Zhong also heard a small breath.

The corners of everyone's mouths couldn't be suppressed anymore.

Shhh - it's our Shuya~ He deserves better!

The author has something to say: I failed the exam, and I am very dissatisfied. Although the final ranking is not bad...but I was still scolded by my parents, and I had to write a reflection, so I didn't make a change.

In addition, the direction of the plot has been decided, and I want to end it soon.

Also...the reader with the negative score...I'm not sure if you did it on purpose or if you were careless, I'm actually quite angry, I said I asked for leave, but the negative score is really not enough, right? It hurts a lot (I'm hypocritical, I'm sensitive, I'm stupid), it's really hard to generate electricity for love, I know it's hard for you guys to follow this article, so I try to keep weekly updates, but I'm actually working hard ( Whisper), because of writing Xiuya, the number of times I have lost control of my emotions has skyrocketed in the past six months, and even the pressure of studying has doubled... Okay, I know I am selfish and spoiled, but I am a little angry, but if I am not careful ...pretend I never said it.

感谢在2020-05-0406:20:58~2020-05-1016:05:41期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

感谢灌溉营养液的小天使：落樱·雪20瓶；温十三、过激中吹的自我修养10瓶；Only、綸【雨】8瓶；风宁语7瓶；花花花花花晚晚、仰望星空、湫兮如风3瓶；鹤丸1瓶；

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!

☆、【Fanwai】The turbid snow

[Her eyes are full of complex expressions, mixed with excessive lies and hypocrisy, creating a gorgeous and extremely sharp beauty, just like a gleaming gem, she utters inexplicable words, mixed with Trembling with uncontrollable excitement, he twisted his body gently, and danced casually and gracefully in the corridor of Mafia with gorgeous stained glass windows, like a wanton dark elf, the light twilight shines through the colorful glass When it comes to her skirt, the sense of illusion and surprise are intertwined, and it can easily catch the attention of others. Is this your poison?Wrapped in a delicate and beautiful skin, but wrapped in a dark heart and extremely cold toxins. 】

【Everyone is killing people for themselves, it's just that I put everything on the bright side. 】

How long ago was that? Before I existed as [Kawakami Yuki], my name had long been deliberately blurred. I still remember the past that was too gloomy and accomplished nothing.

Being slightly bullied on campus is different from beating and scolding. I was much better just being extorted for money. I compared it in my heart. This kind of malicious sense of gap made me feel better. The emotion of gloating at others' misfortune took root in my heart, gradually expanded and eroded my heart.

Being found by the system seems to be not only an opportunity, but also an outlet for venting.

It doesn't feel good to watch my own death from God's perspective. I can only helplessly watch my body being torn apart in the car accident. That huge car accident almost tore me apart, and the beautiful red splashed around me, as if given to me. The cold and hard gray-white concrete floor was painted with a layer of bright-coloured dye. After that, almost all of my own body was roughly ripped out and [recycled]. My body became a large piece that could rot at any time. Discarded pieces of meat.

It was so disgusting, it broke my mind so much.

〖Then come with me. 〗The self-proclaimed number 769 system tempted me and offered conditions that could make anyone tempted. I agreed to all the plans of this poisonous snake without hesitation.

As for possibly being cheated?Ha, what else can I lie to, nothing, nothing, even if it takes this dilapidated body in the future, it won't make much money.

——I just want to live, and I want to live better than others, and I want to stand on a high ground.

Either way, I've delicately created a new face, a new voice, a new beginning, a new experience, a new self.

I dressed myself up as a monster.

"Miss Snow."

"Ash."

"Master Kawakami."

"Kawakami."

"Miss Kawakami."

"Kawakami-san."

"Snow sauce."

I have experienced many, many worlds, and seen many people. Those people call out for such despicable and shameless things like myself. They give everything for this kind of thing, even if they are noble or lowly, without exception, I feel inexplicable. Feeling a strange sense of satisfaction, even being controlled by the system