Ambiguous addiction

The world is so dangerous, there are many straws that want to crush the camel's camel, but it is really hard to say which one will be so lucky to be the last one.

Ye Xi also didn't want to break down emotionally in front of Lu Churan in public. If he could control his emotions at will, he would rather choose to wave his pig's hand in front of Lu Churan, and then said with a heartless smile: "I'm a one-armed hero now, and I'll show you one-handed jerk off tonight."

But there is no way, he couldn't control himself, he suddenly became very wronged under Lu Churan's gaze, when he was a child, his family didn't care, he ran around like a wild child, and it was common for him to get hurt and broken. No one cares whether other people's children "pain or not", so he never yelled "pain" to anyone.

He didn't know how he blurted out this sentence. He felt very frustrated and annoyed at the moment. He, a 25-year-old man, acted like a five-year-old boy and talked about pain with his boyfriend who was not a few years older than him.

But Lu Churan didn't seem to think there was anything wrong with this at all. His serious and cold expression mixed with slight irritation suddenly became very, very gentle. He knelt on one knee and squatted in front of Ye Xi, holding his face , very distressed to wipe away his tears with the pulp of his thumb, but wiped away more and more.

So he opened his arms and hugged Ye Xi, stroked his back one after another, and comforted him silently with a warm hug like in the past.

At that moment, Ye Xi pressed against Lu Churan's chest, and could feel his strong heartbeat, as if the heart was placed in his own chest cavity, and the thorny dark place inside seemed to penetrate the fiery light , The decayed dead branches bloomed, and the soft petals supported and protected the beating heart.

He buried his face in Lu Churan's neck, felt his touch, and suddenly imagined what would happen to him if Lu Churan was the one sitting here bleeding and injured for no reason at this time, and then he felt afraid , My heart was sore violently, as if being whipped with a whip, so I choked up and cried even harder.

He regretted it, regretted it to the point of guilt, he knew he did something wrong, no matter how Tao Jiayue stimulated him to show his obsession with Lu Churan in front of him, he should not vent his anger by hurting himself .

If Lu Churan loves him as much as he loves him, no matter whether he knows the reason or not, he must be so distressed when he sees his injury.

"I'm sorry." Ye Xi pressed his lips against Lu Churan's neck and apologized in a muffled voice, "I made you worry."

Lu Churan let go of Ye Xi, still clutching his arm, raised his head to look at his face, then stretched out his hand to wipe away half of his snot, and said in a low voice, "Slug I'm going to wash my hands, you sit here and wait for me. Have you cried enough, can I stop by the vending machine and buy you a pack of tissues?"

Ye Xi shook his head, sniffed, and tried his best to force a smirk.

A clean freak who thought he was dirty and refused to hug him when he smelled of cigarettes, actually wiped his snot away with his hands calmly, Ye Xi felt that he was extremely honored.

After Lu Churan came back, he took Ye Xi's medicine, helped him put on his coat, took his uninjured hand, and brought him home from the hospital.

Ye Xi's right hand was injured, and his left hand couldn't even hold chopsticks well, so Lu Churan could only feed him mouthfuls. After all, there was still a small distance between the two seats, so even though Ye Xi stretched his neck in the form of a giraffe When he came over, the soup of the meal still dripped on the dining table on the way to his mouth.

Lu Churan wiped the table while feeding. After a few mouthfuls, she became impatient and patted her thigh, "Sit down."

"Ah?" Ye Xi's expression suddenly became a little shy. It's embarrassing enough to ask someone to feed you when you can't take care of yourself. Isn't it a bit too shameless to sit on your lap to feed you?

Lu Churan saw him sitting in a daze and didn't respond, so she urged, "Come here."

Ye Xi didn't dare to be disobedient, so she sat on Lu Churan's lap, and her arms were naturally hooked around his neck without shyness, and she opened her mouth to eat the piece of roast beef that Lu Churan had caught in his mouth. He asked vaguely: "Lu Churan, do you think that the ancient emperors ate like this? Sitting on the lap of a beautiful woman, you don't have to do it yourself. You can eat one bite, and play at the dinner table when you feel excited."

"..." Lu Churan squinted at him sullenly, and couldn't help feeling amused, "That's not how a faint king eats, look at your enchanting posture, that's how a treacherous concubine eats."

"Hmph." Ye Xi pouted in disbelief, and took another big mouthful of rice dipped in sweet sauce, "That's fine, I'm a traitorous concubine, and you're a fool."

"Don't go to Tao Jiayue's TV show, anyway, your hand is injured, so you just found a reason to push it away." Lu Churan changed the subject unexpectedly, and said to Ye Xi, "If you don't go to work these days, follow I went to the store, I recently finished my class, and the next class will be scheduled after New Year's Day next month."

Ye Xi couldn't help being stunned, his chewing speed slowed down, he really wanted to ask Lu Churan, why did you go to have dinner with Tao Jiayue today, but once he asked, all the causes and consequences added up, the reason for his hand injury He couldn't hide it anymore, so he thought about it and still didn't ask.

Even if Lu Churan wants to have dinner with Tao Jiayue, he has done nothing wrong, and he will definitely stand up to questioning. Lu Churan has never been a person who makes decisions without careful consideration. Ye Xi understands this truth, but the relationship between them No one can control Lu Churan's attraction to other people.

Yes, Lu Churan has such a warm and dazzling light that even a bug in the gutter like him is willing to give up all his past denials and distrusts of love in order to look up to and chase him, not to mention those other people who don’t have to give up anything to be able to love. Those who can withstand his shining.

Therefore, a person who has tasted this light will never forget him even after seeing all the scenery in the world.

Ye Xi began to have self-doubt involuntarily again. In his past life, he was surrounded by charms and shadows. The seemingly attractive social relationship was never his medal, but just a disguise for him to cover up his loneliness.

He then thought of the change in Tao Jiayue's eyes from admiration to disdain, and he looked at him as if he was just a waste who used rogue methods to fall for Lu Churan.

If I don't work harder to occupy Lu Churan completely, everyone will know that I am not worthy of having him, and when he finds out that so many people who like him are better than me, I can only be left behind.But I can't live without him, I don't want to be left behind by him.

Ye Xi's eyes darkened, he lowered his eyes and smiled, the corners of his mouth curled up like a small arc, "I have to go to work tomorrow."

"You still go to work? Why go to work when you are injured?" Lu Churan's voice sounded very dissatisfied, and the volume also increased a bit. It is not an exaggeration to say that he yelled at Ye Xi very rudely. He saw Ye Xi's expression In a few seconds, he became lost and suspected that he was wrong, but Ye Xi's gaze lowered, and he couldn't distinguish his emotions, so he asked again, "Why are you working so hard? It's because the pocket money I gave you recently is not enough. Is it spent?"

"It's because I hurt my hand, but it's not my brain. Isn't my work normal? I'm not a lazy person, and I have to work hard at the end of the year." Ye Xi answered it as a matter of course, and said firmly, "I like to earn money. Money."

When I earn enough money, I will take you away from this place and these unpredictable people. Whether you want to open a coffee shop or open your own school in the future, I can support you and be your backer .

"Don't ruin your body." Lu Churan rubbed his stomach through the sweater.

"No." Ye Xi immediately leaned back, showing him his entire stomach, his eyes shining with warmth, "Touch me again."

Sitting on his lap after dinner, he had to touch his stomach for 10 minutes. When Lu Churan got up to wash the dishes, his legs were so numb that he couldn't stand up. He sighed at the dinner table for several minutes like an old man with rheumatoid arthritis.

After he washed and drained the dishes, he packed up the towels, pajamas and underwear to give Ye Xi a bath. When he filled the bathtub, he couldn't help asking Ye Xi, "I have to feed you and bathe you. Touch your stomach and smooth your hair, what do you think is the difference between me and raising a dog now?"

Ye Xi took off his sweater with one hand, unbuttoned his shirt one by one, and said in a very righteous tone, "There's a big difference, you can still have sex with me if you raise me, don't tell me you like it so perverted?" Beast?"

"Shut up." Lu Churan frowned and glared at him, "Don't even think about it until your hands are ready."

"I stripped naked in front of you, don't you have any reverie?"

"No. Don't touch your hands randomly. The pig's hand can't touch the water and quickly lift it up, or I will tie you up."

Ye Xi obediently raised his right hand, saw a hint of cunning in Lu Churan's eyes, and licked his lips with the tip of his tongue, "Why don't we take a bath together, Lao Lu, you won't be able to hold on seeing our sincere meeting for a few minutes. "

"...I'll find a piece of tape to seal your mouth right now."

"No no no no, wait!" Ye Xi anxiously pulled Lu Churan who was about to get up, let it be fine if he didn't let him touch it, and if he didn't let him talk, wouldn't that mean he would suffocate him to death, "Lu Churan, let me ask you , do you still want children now?"

Lu Churan asked him back with a sullen face, "Aren't you bothering me enough?"

"Tao Jiayue said that you want a daughter and send her to a private school with the most beautiful uniforms." Ye Xi stuffed her feet into Lu Churan's bubbly hands, carefully watching his expression, "If you and him Are you still together, will you have a daughter?"

Lu Churan's face was not happy, "There is no if."

"Just assume."

"If I'm still with him, I'll break up immediately and come after you. Are you satisfied?" Lu Churan suddenly became angry, and yelled at him, seeing him sniggering like a thief, and losing his temper Yes, he thought about it seriously, and replied, "He is spoiled by the family, he likes to make decisions on his own, and asking others to obey him is going his own way at best, and selfishness at worst. If he raises a child with me Child, I really can't imagine what kind of bear you will be taught."

Lu Churan washed off the foam on Ye Xi's body, lifted him up from the bathtub with his arms, dried him with a dry and soft towel, put on pajamas and pants, and squeezed him again. She brushed her teeth with toothpaste, twisted a towel to wash her face, and finally picked him up and put him on the bed.

Ye Xi lay on the bed, and met Lu Churan's eyes for a long while. Lu Churan thought for a while, touched his face lightly, and whispered to him: "You are also a bear, but you are sensible. You are obedient and can teach well. So you are here with me, you can have as many years as you want at the age of five, and I will make up for you for the childhood you lost in the past, okay?"