Ambiguous addiction

The waiting time was tough, Ye Xi forced himself to find something to calm down and stop staring at the time, but he couldn't help but turn his attention to the time like an obsessive-compulsive disorder.

He wanted to find a book to read, but all he saw was piled up words, and he couldn't see the emotions behind the words. He didn't feel anxious because of waiting, but all his inner emotions were separated from his outer senses.

His heart was filled with some inexplicable feelings, as if the dough stuffed into the oven expands as the temperature rises, gradually becoming soft and plump, exuding a warm aroma of wheat.

At two o'clock in the middle of the night, he couldn't sleep again, and squatted beside the small green plant on the balcony looking out of the balcony, thinking about how to spend the remaining twelve hours, thinking about seeing Lu Chu However, what should he say in the first sentence, and what else can he do in the future to make up for the mistakes that have become facts.

There are no stars in the night sky of the city, only the rich, deep and dim night sky, on the other side of the light.

"If you tame me, we will be indispensable to each other. To me, you are the only one in the world; to you, I am also the only one in the world." Such a sentence popped up in Ye Xi's mind , and then he said it out of his mouth involuntarily, like a lunatic talking to himself.

He saw this sentence in the only fairy tale book in Lu Churan's bookcase.

The only thing, is it the most important thing, nothing is particularly important to him, because he is not very important to anyone.

However, if Lu Churan is missing, even if he no longer has a little difference in his heart and is no longer worthy of being cared about, he feels as if he has lost something very important.

If so, Xingchuan would be as desolate as a desert in the dark night without streamers.

Does love have to be spoken before it can be recognized? What about people who can’t say it? What about people who don’t believe in love?

If this feeling of caring cannot be conveyed to the other person's heart, is it not the same as loving this person no matter how hard you try to make the other person happy, no matter how much you desire to stay by the other person's side?

"You are indeed the only one in the world to me, and I who have the only you in the world have become the only one in the world."

The potted green plant beside him was bent by the wind, and nodded to him as if in deep agreement.

The sky just lit up, and Ye Xi went out. There were only a few people in the station, and very few people would go to work at such an early hour. The street spreads the hazy morning light.

Ye Xi chose the slowest mode of transportation. He took the bus to the Airport Express ticket office at the international airport and bought a ticket to get on the bus. He watched the sky slowly change from dull gray blue to the sky with the gradually bright morning light. On the edge of the sky, when the sun began to become sharp and strong, he came to the arrival building of the international airport.

There wasn’t even a chair at the exit, and he stood behind the fence more diligently than the security guards at the airport. When his legs went numb, he walked around within a radius of 100 meters from the exit location, and waited for the blood to normalize. Return the pestle to its original position.

Wave after wave of arriving people came out of it, and Ye Xi silently observed others curiously in a corner, some of them were tourists, their eyes full of curiosity and anticipation, some of them were returning home , back to a place with a sense of belonging, looking calm, natural and relaxed.

Countless people hugged him because of the reunion, and countless people walked by alone in a hurry.

When the time finally reached one o'clock in the afternoon, Ye Xi began to feel restless as if he was full of worries.

He had no place to sit and couldn't sit down at all. He nervously checked over and over again whether the flight that landed at two o'clock would arrive on time, and then stood at the most conspicuous place at the exit and waited. Slender legs and long, solemn and serious expression on the face with good features.

Lu Churan saw him at the first sight when he came out of the exit, but he didn't recognize that it was his little friend at all.

Ye Xi saw Lu Churan in the first second, his heart throbbed violently, and then jumped up. He blocked Lu Churan's way to continue walking, and remained silent for a long time. looking at him.

Lu Churan stood on the spot and looked at him carefully. It was only two and a half days since I saw him. Ye Xi had lost a lot of weight. He was wearing a slightly loose khaki sweater and looked baggy. His hair was messy and his eyes were very thick. The lips were white, dry and peeled, and the chin was pointed.

Ye Xi has always been very concerned about his appearance, so he has never seen Ye Xi pay so much attention to his appearance. Although he is still beautiful, he is as sluggish and haggard as a dead leaf, which made him blame himself.

Ye Xi took two steps forward and stuck into Lu Churan's open coat, her small face was coldly pressed against the side of his neck, but the tears were so hot that it hurt him, Lu Churan didn't dare to hug him back, just him Leaning so tightly in his arms, he felt that Ye Xi was so thin that he was hurting himself.

"Do you want me anymore?" Ye Xi asked in a muffled voice, but got no answer.

The light breeze carried the faint residual warmth of the sun around them, and Ye Xi stretched out his hand slightly, trying to catch the only light in the long night of fate.

"I like you." Ye Xi raised his head again, and looked straight into Lu Churan's eyes, those beautiful eyes were full of affection, soaked in the moist tears.

As soon as the words were finished, Lu Churan moved subconsciously, and Ye Xi's embrace tightened in the next second, as if Lu Churan would disappear in place if he didn't do so.

He exhausted all his strength, causing his body to tremble unconsciously, and the words he said became verbatim, "I am a bad person, and I don't believe in love. I never have. I have been in a serious relationship. I know I'm not worthy of sympathy or trust, but I, I like you, it's true, don't leave me, don't want me."

He confessed, he uttered the truest words in his heart, without reservation, without concealment, and sincerely.

He waited for a second, two seconds, three seconds, with tears welling up from his eyes, feeling like he was about to suffocate.

Finally Lu Churan's arms encircled him, he couldn't help sobbing, and buried his face in Lu Churan's neck again, to smell the warm smell he was familiar with.

At the airport, there are often people crying when they are parting or reuniting, so no one thinks that the behavior of these two people is particularly unusual and worthy of attention.

Lu Churan hugged Ye Xi and let him vent and cried for a while, then gently touched his ear tip with his lips, "Why are you wearing so little clothes, is it cold? I can feel that you are holding tight hands through the clothes." .”

Ye Xi shook his head vigorously, tears were on Lu Churan's body, he finally cried until he felt ashamed, then covered his face with his hand, stood up straight and left Lu Churan's embrace, with difficulty Sniffed.

Lu Churan grabbed his hand without hesitation, her icy fingertips were almost frozen.

Lu Churan took off his coat and put it on for him, and then held his hand and stuffed it into the coat pocket to keep warm. The two of them were very close, shoulders rubbing shoulders, and then Lu Churan whispered to him Say, "Let's go home."

Ye Xi bit his lip, lowered his gaze, and nodded his head heavily, wanting to laugh but not daring to laugh.

Ye Xi's expression was a little dazed along the way, but his eyes never left Lu Churan for a second. Lu Churan felt as if he was a prey, and was a little embarrassed to look at him.

Lu Churan wrapped his arms around him, letting him lean into his arms, still covering his hands in his coat pockets to keep him warm.

After getting off the taxi, Lu Churan dragged the suitcase with one hand, hooked Ye Xi's finger in his pocket with the other hand, and led him by the hand, walking all the way towards home.

Ye Xi was a little hypoglycemic, his eyes turned black from hunger, and he was about to faint. After walking a few steps, he was panting badly. Lu Churan's face became heavy. He bought a bowl of chicken porridge at the fast food restaurant downstairs and stared at Ye Xi. Xi went home after eating.

After eating a big bowl of hot porridge, Ye Xi's body started to heat up, and his face was not so pale. He carefully looked at Lu Churan's unhappy face, secretly at a loss.

Then Lu Churan sensed his sight, looked at him for a while, pulled him into the bathroom and began to take off his clothes.

He was a little embarrassed, but he didn't resist. He stood obediently and let Lu Churan move until all his clothes were stripped off, and the person in front of him carefully scrutinized his skin inch by inch from head to toe.

There was a blush on his face, as if he was drunk, he turned his face away awkwardly, and his ears started to feel hot from the base of them.

The delicate and fair skin glowed seductively under the warm yellow light in the bathroom. It was clean without any trace of passion/desire, nor any obvious trauma caused by external force. Lu Churan secretly breathed a sigh of relief and turned on the nozzle Adjust the temperature of the water and pour it on Ye Xi.

Ye Xi whispered a little shyly, "I'll just wash it myself..." Before he finished speaking, Lu Churan gave him a blank stare, and immediately lost the momentum to finish speaking.

"Why did you catch a cold?" Lu Churan asked Ye Xi as he lathered the shower gel and applied it on Ye Xi's body.

"Maybe... lying on the floor all night and catching a cold." Ye Xi clenched his lips when he saw Lu Churan's instantly cold expression.

"What else is uncomfortable?" Lu Churan asked.

Ye Xi didn't dare to answer honestly, "There was also a small blister when I made the noodles, and everything else was gone, and I didn't want to boil water to eat instant noodles, so I only had a stomachache." The blister moved close to Lu Churan to show him.

Lu Churan lowered his head and held his fingertips with a calm expression. He was startled, as if an electric shock had passed through his body, he pulled his fingers away with a hot face and lowered his head, but when he looked down, he saw Lu Churan's hand covered Scrubbing the most sensitive place in front of him, he simply closed his eyes in resignation.

But Lu Churan didn't do anything extra. After turning off the water, he wrapped the clean and fragrant kid in a big fluffy towel to dry off the water, put him in soft and comfortable pajamas, and fed him cold medicine and stomach medicine. I went to take a shower by myself.

Ye Xi thought that Lu Churan wanted to do it, so he prepared the condom and lubricant before he went to take a shower, but when Lu Churan came out, his eyes glanced at those things lightly, and he put them away indifferently.

He was so exhausted from flying, he just wanted to hold Ye Xi and take a good sleep. Ye Xi's eye circles took up half of his face, and his listless eyelids were half drooping. He didn't know how long he hadn't slept, and he was still sick. , why bother him in such a hurry, this kind of thing can be done slowly in the future.

Lu Churan lifted the quilt and got in, stuck to Ye Xi's side, stretched out his arms and gently hugged the person next to him into his arms.

Ye Xi moved, lying on Lu Churan's body with his arms tightly around his waist. He knew very well that this time he would not be pushed away again, and his long messy mood calmed down and relaxed. , and the cold medicine began to take effect, he couldn't help but yawned lazily.

Ye Xi thought about it seriously, and hesitantly apologized and explained in a soft nasal voice with a bad cold, "Are you still angry with me? I'm sorry, I..."

"It was my fault." Lu Churan interrupted him, Ye Xi was stunned for a moment, as if he didn't realize why Lu Churan apologized to him, Lu Churan repeated again, "It's my fault , this time it's my fault."

"How come...you are so angry because I said those words, and I always couldn't say that I like you before, and I felt guilty when others asked me, so I just..."

Lu Churan's Adam's apple moved, and his voice was slightly tense. He stretched out his fingers to touch his lips to seal his words, "I don't know you little liar, you are usually a little bit hard to tell me the truth. You have to blush and stammer, talk nonsense about insignificant things, beat around the bush on things you care about, and most resent others asking about your feelings and past. You don’t even have a friend who can confide in ordinary things. Do you want to confess your feelings?"

Ye Xi lowered his face, and lightly pressed the tip of his nose against Lu Churan's cheek, warm breath sprayed on his face, and gradually became hasty, feeling that he was so weak that he was about to cry.

The feeling of being considered and understood that he had never experienced before, he felt that he became the only person in the world, and he and Lu Churan needed each other indispensablely.

Lu Churan tilted his face to kiss him, and pressed his soft, wet lips against his, gently sucking and kissing his lips, licking his dry lips with the tip of his tongue, he put his hand into the leaf Xi's underwear slowly stroked his back, and moved to his head to rub his hair.

"It's my fault. I should wait for your explanation, instead of throwing such a big temper and leaving you at home alone. I know you are afraid of being alone. I'm sorry, can you forgive me?" Lu Chu However, the mellow and hoarse voice made Ye Xi's ears itchy.

The corners of Ye Xi's lips curled up, his thick eyelashes were wet with tears, he stared blankly at Lu Churan speechless, what was he talking about, is he a fool, obviously I made the mistake first In the end, he apologized to me instead.

After being bored for a while, he hummed again, "I like you, I like you very, very much, Lu Churan."

"Shh, I got it, I like you too." Lu Churan brushed his forehead hair aside, looked at him and smiled, smiling from the bottom of his heart.

He held Ye Xi's face, and kissed Ye Xi's forehead, brows, eyes, nose tip, cheeks, and finally his lips, and then they kissed stickyly for a while, and after saying something, they were embarrassed Recalling the love words, and finally embraced each other and fell asleep.

The author has something to say: How can you not comment when it is so sweet?