hold peck

Midsummer in Yancheng is here.

It didn't know how long after the bell rang for the end of get out of class, Cheng Jiao finally got up sleepily from the desk where he had been laying down all morning.

Just as he was reminiscing about the unfinished strawberries on the cake in his dream, he suddenly caught something unusual out of the corner of his eye.

He saw a beautiful little cutie.

Probably due to his physique that likes to bask in the sun and can't get tanned, the boy generously left half of his fair to almost pale face in the midday sun.

From Cheng Jiao's perspective, one can clearly see the straight nose bridge and overgrown eyelashes of this tablemate whom they met for the first time.

The little cutie is sleeping on her arms.

Cheng Jiao looked at him and held his breath intently.

The classmate suddenly urged him loudly to go to the cafeteria.

The breath he held was released in an instant, Cheng Jiao lost his mind, and kicked the leg of the tablemate.

Judging from past life experience, this kick has almost the same effect as an earthquake.

The big boy's face instantly changed into a bitter and twisted expression, just waiting for the little cutie to sit up and scold him - by the way, he can also see if the two lips hidden in his arms are as he thought nice.

But after waiting for a long time, I didn't see his eyelids move.

The quality of sleep is good, envy.

"I'm sorry, I'll bring you a cake when I come back."

Cheng Jiao muttered something in a low voice, and after he finished speaking, he didn't care whether his buzzing mosquito-like words could fly into the dream of his deskmate, so he hurriedly turned the corner and ran to the side of the classmate who had been waiting for him for a long time.

The boy was so obsessed with the intact strawberry on the strawberry cake that he failed to notice that after he left, the cutie who had just been praised for her good sleep opened her eyes lazily, blinked, and closed them again.

After the lunch break, when Cheng Jiao returned to the class, his new deskmate was gone, and the desk was as clean as if no one had ever sat there.

Was it a dream before?

Cheng Jiao put the strawberry cake he had eaten on the unclaimed table, and said perfunctorily, "Is that right..."

The slender fingers rested on the table after him, and Cheng Jiao followed the beating black blood vessels under the pale skin all the way up, meeting the little cutie's half-raised eyebrows.

"?"

Cheng Jiao blinked his eyes, and quickly evoked a sweet smile.

"Hello, Zhuo, it's the first time we meet. I'll give you a cake. It's super sweet."

The little cutie nodded slightly, bent down and pulled out the tangled earphones from the table frame, and did not forget to take the cake box away when she turned to leave.

The class bell rang, and the boy with earphones passed by the teacher who entered the door, his brows and eyes were cold, without any superfluous expression.

so cool.

……

"0332 bed? 0332? Cheng Jiao!"

The nurse sister yelled into his ear.

Shivering with fright, Cheng Jiao opened his eyes from the sweet dream, passed the nurse, and saw Xu Si by the window sill who was refusing to look at him with a cold face.

Cheng Jiao wiped the drool from his mouth.

The cutie is so fierce.

The midsummer outside the window is exactly the same as the scene in the dream, but unfortunately the two of them are two mental patients in reality.

Cheng Jiao got up from the ground, so tall, but now he could only lower his head and listen to the 1.6-meter nurse sister scolding him honestly.

"What kind of peerless follower are you? Xiao Xu came to chat with the doctor and you have to follow him, even if you follow, you are still sitting on the floor in the corridor and fell asleep?"

"Because there are no chairs here." Cheng Jiao interrupted to defend himself.

The nurse sister glared at him again: "Then hurry back!"

Cheng Jiao nodded obediently, and in the next second, he took a step forward and grabbed Xu Si's wrist, and stole him away without looking back.

The big fool was full of energy, and ran to the small garden in one breath before turning back.

Seeing that the little cutie was breathing slightly short of breath but just frowning and not speaking, he bent his eyes and smiled very disgustingly.

"really like you."

Xu Si's heart stopped beating, and he turned his head away: "Shut up."

Cheng Jiao let go of his hand, squeezed his face and made a funny expression, then started to nonsense again: "Baby."

Xu Si wanted to kick him.

Cheng Jiao took the initiative to put her long legs up, and continued to bow her head to scold: "Baby, I love you."

Xu Si turned around and left.

Cheng Jiao didn't chase after him, just stretched his waist on the spot, his gentle childishness mixed with true and false affection.

"Baby, baby, brother, brother, brother loves you, loves you, loves you, loves you, loves you."

Xu Si stood in front of the glass door and looked back at him coldly: "Go upstairs to cure your stutter."

Cheng Jiao chuckled: "Then I'll go find your brother."

Xu Si was very calm: "You are courting death."

Cheng Jiao was very serious: "I don't want to die, I want to pester you."

Xu Si's eyelids drooped, and his fingertips gripped the armrest of the glass door.

"But I want to die," he said.

Cheng Jiao sighed softly.

My heart beats again, it's so annoying.

Xu Si frowned and turned around, but the laughter behind him sounded again.

"Then I also want to die a little bit, after all, I want to pester you."

Cheng Jiao's tone seemed a little regretful, but also full of satisfaction.

His fingertips trembled uncontrollably, Xu Si pushed open the door, and left the garden without looking back.

I don't know which is crazier.

A lunatic, but after hearing what a lunatic said, he gave birth to a damn heart-wrenching self.

Liang Yan hasn't come today, Xu Si and Cheng Jiao's illnesses are different, they come and go relatively freely, and occasionally wander around in this big hospital.

He is not an active character, he may walk around trying to meet someone, but he always fails.

For some reason, he avoided the nurse's eyes and walked to the dental office. Xu Si stared at the figure with his back in a daze, and his chaotic heartbeat gradually calmed down.

Xu Peck had just pulled out a child's tooth.

The children who came today were particularly timid, terrified and crying so wronged.

The parents frowned and scolded him: "Why are you so not brave, you are too fragile."

Why are you so weak.

Xu Si's teeth tightened, he turned his head, and suddenly wanted to leave.

"He's very brave." Xu Peck said behind him.

The little dentist in a white coat knelt down and patted the child's head. He was very gentle: "It hurts to extract the tooth, and you are working hard to be strong, right?"

The kid nodded and looked at him like a hero with tears in his eyes.

"Oh, are you here to see a doctor? Have you registered yet?"

The nurse outside the door didn't know who was asking, Xu Peck turned his head and saw Xu Si who was slightly embarrassed by the door.

Although when he saw the past, he straightened up in shock, but the softness in his eyes hadn't had time to hide.

I was going to leave, but I felt it was too deliberate, so I didn't move.

Xu Si defended himself in his heart.

Xu Peck came over.

His elder brother who was a little taller raised his hand to touch Xu Si's soft hair, smiling so nicely, it made him feel a little bit embarrassed by the slight jealousy he had just had for that child.

"Xiao Si."

"Ah."

Xu Si nodded, carefully covering up the slight choking in his voice.

He misses him very much.

Xu Si has been ill for a long time, or maybe he has never been better.

When he left Yancheng that year, he also thought that his life would restart.But when everything around him was really gone, he gradually fell into deeper anxiety.

Xu Si has always been afraid of going to school.

When I was a child, I was afraid because someone in school bullied him, and later I was afraid because everyone in school laughed at him.

Then now, why is he still afraid.

The teacher is very good, the classmates are very good, and everyone treats him with a smile. In his memory, he has never experienced such a life since kindergarten.

Good, but he still couldn't help wanting to run away.

Is he still sick.

Xu Si wrote his doubts about himself into the letter to Xu Peck, but after being silent, he still tore off the paper and threw it into the trash can, picked up a pen and re-recorded the three thousand words of the day.

He probably shouldn't have gone to school, but he had no reason.

When he heard his classmates whispering "he has depression, we should treat him well", Xu Si felt an unspeakable sense of relief in his heart.

Sure enough.

People like him can be treated well only because of sympathy.

He no longer needs to carefully please his classmates every day, he can be as indifferent as before, because in fact it doesn't matter what he does, and no one treats him as a normal person.

Back home from school, Liang Yan was still trying her best to smile gently at herself.Xu Si suddenly smiled at her, and then softly announced in the surprised eyes of the woman: "I will not go to school from tomorrow."

After the silence, what greeted him was the cry of Liang Yan's complete breakdown.

What are you crying for?Xu Si thought.

He's fine, he just doesn't want to go to school anymore.

Xu Si went back to the room, grabbed the pen, and took out the letter that had not yet been sealed. At the end, Zhenzhi added another sentence: "Goodbye, brother."

Don't feel sorry for him anymore, live a good life, brother.

Xu Si was so decisive when he broke the letter and asked Liang Yan to send text messages.

But has he ever regretted it?

It should be regrettable.

Otherwise, when Liang Yan took the initiative to suggest whether to go back to Yancheng for treatment, her first reaction would be to look forward to it.

He would have had other emotions, too.

Xu Peck called Liang Yan, and Xu Si was sitting on the bench outside the dental office, obediently waiting for his brother to get off work.

Uneasy in my heart, but also shyly expecting.

He was afraid that Xu Peck would hate his moaning and capriciousness, but his brother was so good and had always loved and cared for him since he was a child.

Why are you so weak.

When he was young, his mother looked at him and frowned tightly.

Xu Si's eyes widened in a daze. It was Xu Peck who stood in front of him, raised his head, and stammered to explain to the adults: "Auntie, he wants to be strong."

"You don't have this disease, I don't know, Xu Si wants to be strong."

Perhaps it was this sentence that made him never try to end his life by himself during countless moments of involuntary self-questioning.

He wants to be a really strong man.

But he was unlucky.

At the beginning of the year, Liang Yan was diagnosed with cancer.

It was an early stage, and the possibility of being cured was very high, but Xu Si, who was suffering from repeated illnesses, once again fell into self-suffocating despair.

He thinks he sucks.

His dad loved him and he never once visited him in prison.

His older brother loves him, and he's determined to sever their connection.

His mother loves him, but has nothing to gain but heartbreak and illness.

Did he actually deserve to die?

Xu Si returned to Yancheng with his head down, and met his deskmate who he abandoned without saying hello.

The last thing you want to see is him.

Xu Si looked at the sunlight outside the window, and resignedly remembered the ear-piercing conversation in the small garden just now.

Five years, two thousand days and nights are enough for him to understand how much he likes Cheng Jiao.

But both of them are lunatics, what are two lunatics together.

"Sandwich cookies."

Someone stood in front of him, talking without beginning or end.

Xu Si looked up in astonishment, and saw 0332 who had successfully absconded.

The lunatic leaned down and put his face close to his ear, so serious for the first time in his life.

"Baby, do you want to eat sandwich cookies? I'm so hungry."

"..."

After silence, Xu Si finally kicked his first kick in five years.

But this time, Cheng Jiao did not allow him to bully him like he did countless times in the past. Instead, he bent down and grabbed Xu Si's empty trouser leg, squatted down holding his ankle, raised his head, and laughed like a bubble big fool.

The people in the waiting room gradually disappeared at some point, Xu Peck changed his clothes and came out, editing the text message to He Zhi, when he caught a glimpse of a terrible scene out of the corner of his eye.

The sunshine is very good. When it shines into the room through the window, people forget the smell of disinfectant and think of the classroom before and after lunch break.

In the classroom, there are two beautiful boys kissing quietly.