i have a chromosome want to meet you

Mental Health Center.

The place Fu Jue agreed upon was the Mental Health Center.

Chu Xiuyuan had accompanied his mother here before, so he was deeply impressed.

Arriving at the agreed staircase on the second floor, Fu Jue was already waiting for him at the staircase in a white coat, and then led him into a consulting room.

There are two sofas near the door of the consulting room, a chair, a desk for writing, and a chair behind the desk. It looks like it is for patients and doctors to sit on.

There is a row of screens behind the doctor, and there are two seats hidden inside. Fu Jue arranged Chu Xiuyuan in the chair behind the screen, and told him: "Don't talk when you hear anything."

At this moment, Chu Xiuyuan had already had a bad premonition crawling all over his body.

Five minutes later, he heard a middle-aged man's voice. Fu Jue called him Mr. Bai and told him that Chu Xiuyuan was behind the screen. Mr. Bai didn't seem surprised at all, obviously they had discussed it beforehand.Another 5 minutes later, Chu Xiuyuan heard Song Yu's voice for the first time in 5 days.

I heard Song Yu haggardly and tiredly say hello: "Teacher Bai, Fu Jue."

Chu Xiuyuan was stunned suddenly, it was haggard and fragile that he had never heard before.

Teacher Bai: "Is it better?"

"Heh..." A long sigh, "It's much better."

But at this time, Chu Xiuyuan clenched his fists tightly and wanted to smile wryly, but found that he couldn't even make a sound.

Do you feel better?much better……

Teacher Bai, Fu Jue's postgraduate tutor and psychiatrist when he was studying for a master's degree, asked Song Yu if he was feeling better.

Heh... Throughout the winter vacation, he was chewing on Song Yu's confusing farewell, every single word, and he had many guesses, but now he knows that Song Yu's sentence "I'm not in a good state, very bad", It refers to...

Are you kidding me?

What a joke!How could Song Yu have a mental illness?Tell me it's fake!It's all fake!

Even if he has a mental illness, why didn't he tell me?Am I that unworthy of his trust?

Chu Xiuyuan's lips trembled, but he still couldn't make a sound.As Fu Jue said, he couldn't speak, he couldn't even move or make any noise.

If Song Yu really had a mental illness, then he must not interrupt Song Yu's treatment, and he also wanted to know what happened to Song Yu.

During the period of being with him, Song Yu hardly had any abnormalities. What kind of symptoms did Song Yu have?

Whether it's depression, mania, or bipolar disorder, if you can't hide it for half a year, there are always some details that are strange, but no matter how you think about it, Chu Xiuyuan can't grasp the clue.

He only knew that Song Yu was very strange when he said goodbye to him on the phone that day, but before... Chu Xiuyuan couldn't think of it, and he seemed to have no thoughts at all.

What exactly are Song Yu's symptoms?

He buried his hands deeply in his palms, clenched his teeth, and scratched his forehead with curled fingers, almost tearing the skin on his eyebrows.

Chu Xiuyuan thought a lot, but only a few seconds passed.

Regarding Song Yu's "much better" answer, Teacher Bai was not convinced: "Is it really much better? Why did I hear that Fu Jue said that your condition has been getting worse, and you only came once during the whole winter vacation. Has the attitude not improved?"

Song Yu sighed again, and finally Fu Jue answered for him: "No, after he came that day, his parents found out when he came home and threw away all his medicine."

Mom and Dad threw away Song Yu's medicine?Chu Xiuyuan immediately thought of his mother. Because of the stigma of the disease, he stopped taking the medicine privately, which led to the recurrence of the disease.He originally thought that Song Yu knew so much about stigma, because of his identity as a psychology fan, it seems that he was wrong. Song Yu is very clear about the phenomenon of stigma, because his parents have a strong public stigma Feeling so bad, he actually threw away all of Song Yu's medicines.

Chu Xiuyuan's tooth sockets tightened even more. No, Song Yu's interest in psychology is not out of liking, but because he himself has a mental illness!

Thinking of this, Chu Xiuyuan could no longer deceive himself and have illusions. Song Yu has always had a mental illness, and Song Yu has kept it from him from the beginning to the end.

"Where was it hidden?" He continued to ask.

Song Yu: "In the bottle of Vitamin C..."

Chu Xiuyuan raised his head abruptly, vitamin C bottle, vitamin C bottle?Is it the can on the desk in Song Yu's bedroom?Isn't the Liushen Pill hidden in there?

In an instant, Chu Xiuyuan's face turned pale.

He remembered that when he picked up the bottle, Song Yu squeezed his palm so hard that red marks appeared on his arm, and Song Yu's hesitation...

But he didn't think about it at all!

Such an abnormal behavior, why didn't I think about it more, why didn't I notice it at all? !

Teacher Bai sighed heavily: "I am most afraid of the patient meeting such a family member. Your condition keeps coming back and forth, and your parents keep obstructing you. I am very worried about you."

Song Yu took a deep breath, with a haggard tone, but still hiding his unique warmth: "I'm sorry, Teacher Bai, for making you worry."

"It's useless for you and me to be sorry. I've known you since two years ago. How many times have you said sorry to me?" Teacher Bai said softly and calmly, "It's me who should say sorry, and my research direction is not ERP and Morita therapy, I can't give you more targeted help, I am ashamed."

Chu Xiuyuan, who was eavesdropping behind the screen, trembled his eyes slightly, opened his lips slightly, and muttered silently, ERP, Morita Therapy, ERP, Morita Therapy... Where did he see it, where, where... his eyes widened, The eyeballs froze suddenly, "Abnormal Psychology", in the treatment of a certain psychological disorder in "Abnormal Psychology", you can squint your eyes for a moment, which psychological disorder?Why can't I remember the critical moment?

Teacher Bai: "I really recommend that you go to Teacher Cao for treatment. He is better at psychological counseling. Here, I can only prescribe you some medicine to relieve symptoms."

Teacher Bai didn't say what he said later, but even Chu Xiuyuan knew, what's the use of prescribing medicine?Song Yu's parents could throw away all his medicines, Song Yu couldn't take the medicine on time, the illness would never get better!

"Mr. Bai, Song Yu himself really wants to go to Mr. Cao's place, but you know he has no money..." Fu Jue's voice also became helpless, "Since his family learned that Song Yu took the money he saved with money, After seeing the doctor for living expenses, he was very stingy with him, for fear of giving a little more money, he would go to the hospital. I talked with his parents, and they didn’t admit that this is a common disease at all. It seems that as long as they admit it, they will His son is a lunatic, he is no longer their excellent offspring, they always think that when Song Yu gets sick, they just shut him down and he doesn't need any intervention at all."

Teacher Bai sighed.

Fu Jue added: "Otherwise he would not have joined the Psychological Society, and he would not have suddenly come over to beg me after learning that I was your default graduate student, asking me to persuade you to use the 20 minutes before the consultation to talk to him. talk."

Teacher Bai: "I only have two Tuesdays a month for consultation here. We all hope that through hard work, your condition will improve and you can overcome difficulties. I hope that you can receive individual treatment every week instead of With my time, I can only come once or twice a month. You need more targeted and more stable treatment."

"I really want to too." Song Yu replied, but was completely helpless.

After that, they didn't speak for five or six seconds. Chu Xiuyuan didn't know what their expressions were during those five or six seconds, but his heart was already full of turbulent waves, and it was full of emotions from the big one just now. A very informative conversation.

No wonder Song Yu and Fu Jue have such a good relationship, no wonder someone said that on Tuesday morning, Song Yu would deliver breakfast to Fu Jue even if he didn't have class, no wonder some people thought Song Yu's sweetheart was Fu Jue, no wonder Fu Jue knew about it on the phone Information, much more than him.It was all because of Song Yu's psychological barrier, and Fu Jue helped him for two full years.

Fu Jue was kind to Song Yu.Without Fu Jue's help, Song Yu's condition might be more serious than it is now.

What surprised Chu Xiuyuan even more was that during the conversation, he found out that Song Yu's condition could not be controlled due to various reasons. His situation was much, much worse than that of his mother. At least in his family, he and his father supported his mother. To see a doctor, but Song Yu's here is completely the opposite.

To say that Song Yu's parents are traditional is to beautify them, they are simply pedantic and ignorant!At that time, the older generation had no news and saw very little. They thought that mental disorders were insanity or lunatics. But now that the reform and opening up have been carried out for so many years, why do they still have such stupid ideas!

"Okay, let's not waste time, tell me if you have any new symptoms recently." Dr. Bai got to the point.

Song Yu thought for a while: "No."

"No." Fu Jue's voice also sounded.

"Very good." Doctor Bai replied, "Then let's talk about the symptoms that appeared before. In late October, you told me that you peeled a whole box of apples. You knew it was meaningless, but you must pursue apples." One piece of skin keeps going, now?"

Song Yu sounded calm: "I won't peel apples now."

But Chu Xiuyuan couldn't calm down in his heart.

Apple?

One stick?

this is not……

On the night after the concert, Song Yu invited him to the dormitory for the first time, and invited him to eat apples. Song Yu always described apples as skulls, and Chu Xiuyuan laughed and called him crazy. How did Song Yu respond back then?Song Yu replied, "We have a neuropathy and a neurologist, just right."But now, it turns out that Song Yu wasn't joking at all!

Chu Xiuyuan also jokingly asked Song Yu if he could peel apples continuously, and then Song Yu peeled eight apples at once. But if it keeps going, you will be happier", I didn't find anything unusual at all!He really felt better because of Song Yu's actions.

But these turned out to be symptoms?

After that, Teacher Bai asked Song Yu a lot, for example, he would keep thinking, what would happen if he lived a little more selfishly, for example, he would repeatedly think about what Chu Xiuyuan was doing, and even couldn't help himself to think about today's cafeteria Will there be pork cutlets? If there are fried pork cutlets, he will be anxious.

There were many, many, but Chu Xiuyuan couldn't hear the next few symptoms. He only felt a strong tinnitus in his head, and he couldn't even control his breathing. His heart was filled with white waves!

Could it be that...Song Yu's symptoms were all related to him? !

He said to Song Yu that "people should live more selfishly", Song Yu has been thinking about him, he said to Song Yu "every pork chop must be bought", and a week before the exam week, Song Yu bought it for him Ordered three pork chops!Song Yu said to scare him, didn't he? !

Chu Xiuyuan didn't dare to think about it anymore, he didn't dare to think deeply at all!

Those symptoms are all related to him, all related to him.

No wonder Fu Jue told him that he caused Song Yu pain... So Fu Jue told him not to contact Song Yu recently, in order to prevent Song Yu from developing new symptoms due to his unintentional words or actions?

It's ridiculous, it's ridiculous, isn't this similar to the hysteria described in "When Nietzsche Cried"?Isn't that a novel?

But Chu Xiuyuan couldn't laugh at all.

It was as if Song Yu had poked a hole in his heart, bleeding out.He made Song Yu feel pain, he wished he could stab himself to death, he actually made Song Yu feel pain...

The author has something to say: The inspiration for this article comes from "When Nietzsche Cried". I am very interested in the hysteria described in the book, so I came up with the idea of ​​writing this article.When I was reading the article, I was inspired, and the first thing I conceived was such a plot.Of course Song Yu didn't have this problem.

So all the plots before and after are based on this.Without this plot, everything that came before would not exist.You drank the water of Poyang Lake before, and this plot is the source of water, the source, and the starting point of everything.I know that most readers like the expanded plots, which are relaxed and sweet, but I can't cut off the source.I always think that if they can still be together after experiencing setbacks, then they can cherish their feelings and each other more, and they can definitely go further than those who have never grown up hand in hand and have never redeemed each other.The true meaning of sweet texts is not that on the surface you dote on me and I dote on you, a text has passed hahaha but I don’t remember anything in a blink of an eye, but I cherish it from the bottom of my heart. Without you, I will lose half of the world.