Traceable

You are dirty.These three words made Gu Xun stunned, unable to move for a long time.

Lin Yuyao's brain turned slowly, and the words slipped out of his mouth unconsciously. For a long time, he himself didn't understand whether it was a sincere sentence or...or what?He doesn't know either.He was very confused, Gu Xun was lying beside him, his breath was familiar, but it seemed strange.A bunch of pictures in his mind were mixed together, causing him a headache and a breakdown.

Gu Xun took a deep breath, forced himself to hide his embarrassment and said, "I'm going to the bathroom."

Lin Yuyao lay down without responding, Gu Xun got off the bed, searched for a long time before finding the slippers, dragged them and fled into the bathroom.

The phrase "You're dirty" followed him into the bathroom like a shadow, and kept repeating in his ears.How others attack him can be ignored.But Lin Yuyao's words made him feel uncomfortable, as if his body was torn in two.

One was lying on the bed, the other was in the bathroom, and the two were silent.In the dark, only their tinnitus can be heard.

It took a long time for Gu Xun to come out of the bathroom. Instead of going to bed, he opened the cupboard to search for things.Lin Yuyao didn't move at first, and when she heard the rustling in her ears, she couldn't help but turned around and asked, "What are you doing?"

"I'll make a bed on the floor." Gu Xun didn't look at him, but stared at the quilt in his hand, "Go to sleep, I'll finish it right away."

Lin Yuyao lay on his side and watched his clumsy movements. The other party didn't dare to look back, and his eyes kept avoiding him.After watching for a while, Lin Yuyao turned his back on Gu Xun and ignored it.

After tossing and tossing, Gu Xun lay down, feeling unexplainable emotions in his heart.

Lin Yuyao said he was dirty.Gu Xun doesn't think that a person can only have a relationship with one person in a lifetime, physical pleasure is not taboo to him, and a deal with Qi Le is not a heinous crime or a crime, but it hurt Lin Yuyao, this is a fact.

This alone made Gu Xun feel uneasy.

The two shared a room, lay holding their breath, and stayed up all night.

The next morning Gu Xun woke up first, went back to his own room to wash up, Zhu Yi made breakfast, and babbled: "Mr. Lin likes to eat spicy food, but this early in the morning, there is nothing spicy to eat."

"We seldom eat spicy food when we are together," Gu Xun said.

"That's because he's accommodating you. You usually work out of town. When I go there, he always secretly says that he wants to eat Sichuan food." Aunt Zhu is from Sichuan.

Gu Xun was drinking from a water glass: "He never told me."

Aunt Zhu said: "He has a heavy heart and doesn't like to talk about it, for fear that you will accommodate him in turn."

Gu Xun put down the cup, and whispered to himself: "I hope he will speak out."

Aunt Zhu cooked breakfast, Gu Xun put the food on the plate and went to the opposite door with it.He didn't knock on the door, thinking that Lin Yuyao hadn't slept all night, maybe he was a little sleepy early in the morning, so don't wake him up.He opened the door lightly, entered, and took two steps inside but heard voices.

"...He was angry at that time, pointing at Director Huang...Gu Xun?" Zhang Tingyun put the plate on the dining table while talking, and saw him when he looked up.

Lin Yuyao came out of the kitchen behind Zhang Tingyun, and was taken aback when he saw him.

Gu Xun was also surprised.He knew that Zhang Tingyun came here often during this period, but the taste of meeting him face to face was rather subtle.He just went back early in the morning to get breakfast, but he was one step late, and someone else had already entered the room.

But it was impossible to turn around and leave at this time, so Gu Xun had no choice but to raise the things in his hands: "I asked Aunt Zhu to make breakfast."

"Let's go together, I'm just halfway through, and I can rest now." Zhang Tingyun said with a smile.

Lin Yuyao didn't speak, Gu Xun took out the food and placed it on the table.

The three of them had breakfast around the table, and the atmosphere was weird.Zhang Tingyun seemed to be able to do anything with ease, with a smile like a spring breeze blowing on his face, and said to Lin Yuyao, "Try today's fried eggs. The fried eggs were too cooked last time. This time it should be just right."

Lin Yuyao picked it up and took a bite. After chewing slowly, he smiled and said, "This time it's a soft-boiled egg, which is delicious."

Zhang Tingyun said: "That's good, there is no shame."

They talked very happily. From daily chatting to filming, Lin Yuyao always had a smile on his cheeks. Gu Xun stared at him and found that he ate a lot, most of which were made by Zhang Tingyun.But he only moved a few mouthfuls of the one he brought over.

In the triangle relationship, Gu Xun seems to be the redundant one.

After eating, Zhang Tingyun cleared the table, Gu Xun took the plate he brought over, and said, "I'll take it back."

"Wash them together to save trouble." Zhang Tingyun said.

Gu Xun said firmly, "No need."

Lin Yuyao said beside him, "Let him take it back."

Gu Xun went out, returned to his house, and threw the dishes into the pool.He stood there motionless for a moment, then suddenly found a pot, started the fire, and found eggs all over the kitchen.There was a foul breath in his chest and he couldn't vent it. It wasn't jealousy or irritability, but something deeper—almost burning him.

He knocked the egg on the cooking table, but he was inexperienced. After the egg was broken, the egg white and yolk flowed out of his hands.The dripping liquid flowed down the cooking table and palms to the floor, and he kicked the trash can beside him to the ground.

On the other side, Zhang Tingyun cleaned up the dining table, made a cup of coffee, and the two sat on the deck chairs on the balcony.

"Drink milk, it's not suitable for coffee now." Zhang Tingyun pushed the cup to Lin Yuyao.

"You look more like the owner of this family." Lin Yuyao said.

"Haha, turn against the customer, are you blaming me for not treating myself as an outsider?"

"No, that's not what I meant." Lin Yuyao said.

"No need to explain, I'm kidding you." Zhang Tingyun stopped him.

Outside the house is the warm sunshine in autumn, the breeze is pleasant, quiet and comfortable.

"What's going on with you and Gu Xun now? Are you reconciled, or is he chasing you?" Zhang Tingyun thought of bumping into the floor in the bedroom when he came in the morning.

"There is no reconciliation."

"Well... That's why he's chasing you, are you going to agree?"

Lin Yuyao shook his head slightly, denying the sentence.Gu Xun was not chasing him, nor did he intend to agree.

"Then what if I chase you?"

Lin Yuyao suddenly raised his head: "What?"

"If I chase you, do you agree?" Zhang Tingyun looked at him and said.

"Brother, are you kidding me?"

"What do you think?"

Lin Yuyao stared at the other person's eyes, then lowered his head again and said, "Sorry."

Zhang Tingyun waved his hand. He had some affection for Lin Yuyao, but not to the extent that he liked it.During this period of time, I heard some news about the other party, and I was a little worried. When I saw the other party, I could see that the spirit was not good, so I came to accompany him more.

"Why do you apologize? Sometimes you think too much about other people's feelings."

"Is not it good?"

Zhang Tingyun took a sip of coffee and said with a serious face: "Not good. Do you know why I have always had an impression of you?"

Lin Yuyao didn't know what he was referring to.

"The first time I met you was to present you with an award at your graduation ceremony. After you stepped off the stage and you talked to me, other people would take this opportunity to sell themselves, or make me remember him in an ingenious way. But you didn't, we During the chat, I tried to bring the topic to you, but you have always only talked about my movies, my works, and expressing your respect for me." Zhang Tingyun tilted his head at the end.

Lin Yuyao's memory is vague: "Really?"

Zhang Tingyun nodded: "That time you didn't even say your name. You often ignore yourself and care too much about other people's opinions or feelings, which is not good."

"I haven't thought about this," Lin Yuyao said.

"You can think about it and think about yourself. People have preferences and hatred."

Lin Yuyao nodded numbly.

"Also, you can take the initiative in your relationship. Many times, when you talk, everything will fall into place." Zhang Tingyun patted his head.

Lin Yuyao felt that she had been seen through for a moment.

Zhang Tingyun didn't leave until the afternoon, Lin Yuyao stayed in the house alone, and Gu Xun didn't come until before going to bed at night.

No matter how much the emotional backlog is, Gu Xun will go to the opposite house to sleep on the floor at night, and it has become a habit.He was worried that something would happen to Lin Yuyao living alone, and he felt a little relieved only when he was under his nose from time to time.

Zhang Tingyun would come here occasionally, and Gu Xun bumped into him a few times, nodding his head to say hello, they were not familiar with each other.Gu Xun's face is very calm, compared to his attitude towards Zhang Tingyun before the breakup, it seems like a lifetime away.

But Gu Xun still has work, so he can't always look at Lin Yuyao.When he went out to work that afternoon, he called Lin Yuyao and said that he would not be able to come back tonight and asked him to eat and take medicine on time.The medicine was bought by Gu Xun who consulted the doctor, and the other party did not go to the doctor, but he had to take the right medicine.After hanging up the phone, Gu Xun was still worried, so he asked Wu Simin to accompany him.During this period of time, Lin Yuyao lived in seclusion and stopped working. Wu Simin saw him very few times.Lin Yuyao didn't react too much when he saw her, he ate and took medicine quietly, but Wu Simin felt sour when he saw her.

Wu Simin left in the evening. She had a successful blind date last time and had already started a relationship. At this time, her boyfriend sent a date invitation, and she watched Lin Yuyao finish eating and left.

Gu Xun originally couldn't make it back, but he finished his work ahead of schedule and rushed back to Beijing in the dark.The leaves on both sides of the road in the community have changed color, and autumn in Beijing is swift and aggressive.Gu Xun stepped on the broken leaves and walked into the building. He originally wanted to go home and put away his things first, but couldn't resist opening the door to the opposite room.

The room was as silent as ever, and when he walked in, the first scene that caught his eyes frightened his heart into his throat again.

Gu Xun couldn't describe the scene when he saw Lin Yuyao sitting on the sofa holding a fruit knife, he felt like thunder was hitting his head, and his whole body was split in half.He stepped forward, grabbed Lin Yuyao's right hand, and roared, "What are you doing again?"

Lin Yuyao was so frightened that he shrank back on the sofa, muttering and trying to explain: "I'm..."

"I've only been walking for a day, and I didn't see you, so you started again." Gu Xun didn't give him a chance to speak, and pinched Lin Yuyao's wrist excitedly, the latter twisted his fingers in pain, and the knife fell from his fingertips down.

"Gu Xun, don't do this." Lin Yuyao struggled.

"What about me?" Gu Xun's eyes were bloodshot, and he couldn't hear anything, "What do you really want? Do you want to die? Do you want to harm yourself?"

As he said, he used his other hand to pick up the fruit knife that fell on the ground, stuffed it back into Lin Yuyao's hand, and gestured to his arm: "Okay, don't come at yourself, come at me, swipe at me, swipe at me, go at me." Stab me!"

Lin Yuyao was frightened by his crazy appearance, and eagerly twitched his wrist, shrinking his whole body back: "Don't be like this, don't be like this, okay?"

During the movements of the two, the knife edge touched Gu Xun's skin and cut a bloody gash.Lin Yuyao saw the blood oozing out, cried a few times in his throat, and struggled more violently.

"Don't you like this? Are you happy? Huh?" Gu Xun asked him.

Lin Yuyao was already crying, sobbing, "I just wanted to peel a fruit, really, Gu Xun, I didn't intend to harm myself."

Gu Xun went crazy, let go of his strength, and fell backwards, sitting on the ground, the coffee table on which his back was leaning was knocked out a few centimeters by the weight of his body, revealing the peaches that had fallen to the bottom.

Lin Yuyao was peeling fruit just now, the sound of Gu Xun opening the door startled him, and the peach in his hand fell to the ground.

Gu Xun sat on the floor, but he didn't feel relaxed at all. He suddenly smiled, his smile looked bitter and tired.After rushing to work all day, when he got home and saw this picture, his backlog of emotions suddenly exploded.

Lin Yuyao was frightened and curled up on the sofa holding the handle of the knife.

"Scared you?" Gu Xun asked softly.

Lin Yuyao looked up at him, then lowered his eyes again, without speaking.

"I seem to have done something wrong again." Gu Xun laughed at himself, "I wanted to be with you and hope that your illness would recover, but I haven't done anything during this time. Nothing has changed."

When he saw Lin Yuyao holding a knife in his hand, he really couldn't control himself.He finally understood what it felt like, and it was—powerless.

He can't do anything.

"Wouldn't it be much better if it was Zhang Tingyun or someone else?" Gu Xun said again, "Will you be better if someone else stays with you? It's better than me, right? Make things worse."

"...No." Lin Yuyao said in a low voice.

Gu Xun smiled: "I know I'm not good, and I can't help you out. I look at you and feel powerless. If you don't want me to appear in front of you again, I will leave immediately."

Lin Yuyao always turned a blind eye to him, with an attitude of avoiding him.When facing Zhang Tingyun, he will be polite, will force himself to laugh, and will eat the food made by the other party.But when it came to Gu Xun, there was only ignorance and silence.

He really didn't want to see himself.Gu Xun came to this conclusion.

Lin Yuyao didn't speak, but lowered his head.Gu Xun knew it, and the answer has come out.He wiped his face, put his right hand on the floor and prepared to get up.

This walk may be the real end.

The two knew it well.

Gu Xun's heart was ashamed, he half stood up on the ground, swayed a bit, managed to stand still and said softly: "Goodbye".

However, before the words fell, a pulling force pulled him down. Without noticing, he fell back to the floor, and at the same time, a force held him tightly.

"No, no." Lin Yuyao hugged Gu Xun's shoulders tightly, buried her head in his neck, and said, "You are fine."

Gu Xun opened his eyes wide and froze in place.

"Do you know what you're talking about?" Gu Xun asked.

"I know. You are fine." Lin Yuyao repeated.