Rebirth of the Abandoned Son Without Regrets

Background: Gu Yuanyang was reborn, about the time after Yin Chuan threw Gu Yuanyang down and ate him up, and before Gu Yuanyang recovered Ayang's memory.

Gray is the only color in memory, I have been wandering in the underworld for a long time.Standing beside the Naihe Bridge, I watched those souls walk across the bridge in an orderly manner, drink the familiar soup, and head for a new reincarnation.For a long time, I slowly wanted to reach out to touch the reincarnation well, but was blocked, unable to move.Those who have passed away are not allowed to enter reincarnation.The mother-in-law said, maybe I have to wait a long time.

I am Gu Yuanyang.The memory is becoming more and more dim in the darkness day after day, and the once tiny expectations have already begun to fade and become blurred in the long seemingly endless waiting.I began to forget, forgetting the warmth of my initial obsession, and even began to forget myself.Only those bloody and dark memories became clearer in this dark place.The moon rises, and it's a new day.

I walked among the coquettish and blooming flowers on the other side, and slowly squatted down.Flower, will you cry?Do you feel sad when you can't see the sun?No one answered, I slowly closed my eyes.It's another day.At the same time, the silver light of the well of reincarnation flickered, sucking the almost empty soul of the sleeping boy into it.

modern.Yin Chuan kissed the lips of the sleeping man in his arms, his eyes were full of tenderness and affection.Gu Yuanyang is his.The boy in his arms groaned softly and slowly woke up.

The body hurts.Such a message came from my dull brain, I struggled to open my eyes, and stared blankly at the man beside me.Familiar face, stern eyebrows and eyes with a warmth that I am not familiar with.Yin... Chuan?After a long time, I slowly remembered who the person in front of me was.The man in front of me is holding me in his arms with one hand, and there are unfathomable emotions in those pure black eyes.

"Yuanyang, you're awake." Yin Chuan's deep and hoarse voice sounded beside my ears, and his warm breath while speaking stimulated this body.He kissed my lips, covered me with the quilt carefully, and his words were full of concern, "Yuanyang, how is your body? Is there any discomfort?" I didn't speak, and my memory seemed to be still in the underworld. For a while, I just closed my eyes, woke up again and returned to the world, the long-lost world that has long been blurred.

I don't know which time point this is in my memory, and there is no need to explore it.When my eyes inadvertently touched the little sunlight leaking from the cracks in the curtains, I only felt dazzling, and I no longer had the feeling of yearning.There has always been no sunshine in the underworld, and the pale moon is so cold that it hangs high every day.Lingering for too long, I have almost forgotten the temperature of the sun.To those who are used to the cold, the sun only leaves a burning sensation, nothing else.

Thoughts still didn't stop, but the powerful beating of the heart in his chest became more and more clear.This is, alive?My eyes dimmed, and I clenched my hands involuntarily.Maybe it really has been wandering in the dark for too long, the once vivid and warm memory is now only visible in outline, only the thick gray that swept through the rest of my life is still clearly audible.

The dim memory, besides the dimness, can't hold the slightest emotion in my heart.I've never forgotten the hopeless emptiness of being abandoned and raped, I just don't feel it anymore.My soul is cold and empty, and all my obsessions and pursuits are in that dark place, being wiped out little by little, and my heart is full of nothingness.I forgot the meaning of existence.In my world, there is only a long wait, looking forward to the happiness of the next life.In Gu Yuanyang's life, is there anything worth remembering?

My thoughts were interrupted by a voice, "Yuanyang?" I slowly turned my head to look, and Yin Chuan was looking at me with uneasy eyes.He felt a little strange, but that strangeness was quickly suppressed by the joy of completely possessing the person in his arms.His eyes became softer, and he took my arm and brought me closer to him, almost sticking together.I was numb, and some didn't understand the meaning of his behavior.He said: "Yuanyang, if you don't feel well, just sleep for a while."

Feeling slightly puzzled and doubtful, the Yin Chuan in front of him seemed to be quite different from the one in his memory.The Yin Chuan in his memory has always been strong and cold, never had such gentle words.I was at a loss in my heart, but I didn't explore it.Anyway, it's all about the previous life, and I will not stay for the meaningless past after all.I want to start everything new.

The soreness from my body made the corners of my lips twitch slightly, and the familiar feeling made me understand what happened.The memory is too far away, so blurry that I don't know when I am.I moved my body, and saw my expressionless face from Yin Chuan's pure black eyes.With some difficulty, I asked, "Yin Chuan, what time is this?" I heard my voice without any ups and downs, stiff, with a faint chill oozing out.The chill was not intentional, but the result of wandering in the underworld for a long time.

Perhaps it was because my expression was too blunt, Yin Chuan's gaze was somehow suppressed, as if he had thought of something.His expression was a little strange, and there seemed to be a smear of pain passing quickly in his eyes.He opened his mouth slowly, and asked inappropriately: "Now, you are 19 years old." 19 years old... I tried to remember myself at that time, and then staggered out of bed, enduring the discomfort of my body and getting dressed little by little.Lowering my head respectfully, I said, "Master, do you want this subordinate to resign?"

That sentence seemed to have a great impact on Yin Chuan. I clearly saw his body stiffen slightly, and his eyes darkened for a moment, as if ink was about to drip out.His expression was unpredictable, as if he had guessed something unbelievable.His voice was still calm, but he couldn't help trembling, "Yuanyang." He called out. Hearing this, I replied according to the identity I remembered: "Guangzhu, but what else can I tell my subordinates?" Next?" The voice was calm and unwavering, but my heart beat slightly faster.It was slightly excited.

There is still a hint of joy in the air that has not completely dissipated after love, like the heart-to-heart exchange between the two before telling the accident.

I lowered my eyes, and my eyes lightened slightly——does Yin Chuan have another mission?The pain of the bullet piercing through the body, the pain of being suffocated in the oxygen mask, is as vivid as if it was yesterday.Tasks represent a method of liberation.With another mission, I will be able to end this pale and empty life just like the last time, without having to repeat the meaningless dark, cold, and depressing life.Thinking of death, thinking of liberation, my heart raised a trace of anticipation.Perhaps, I will soon be able to leave completely.The corners of my lips twitched for a moment.No one can see through my thoughts at the moment.

The man didn't do what I expected, he walked out in a little haste, as if he was trying to avoid something.Before leaving, he left a sentence: "Yuanyang, you should rest here." I watched Yin Chuan's figure gradually disappear from my sight, my body still maintained that posture, but I was thinking about how to walk Clean and neat.After all, this may be the only thing I can call obsession today.Die quietly somewhere, instead of living like a puppet now.

The sun outside the window was still bright, I squinted and walked slowly to the window.It's really beautiful.I stared at the thing I was most looking forward to, and subconsciously reached out to touch it.The temperature of the sun was exceptionally warm, almost scorching hot.I withdrew my hand and plunged back into the darkness without a trace of nostalgia.If it hadn't been touched for a long time, there would be a kind of burning pain.Gu Yuanyang, he really is a person abandoned by the sun.

Looking around the room, I finally found a dagger.The blade reflected the light, and a silver light flashed.Pinning him on my body, I walked towards the bathroom.Am I really alive now?There was doubt in the amber eyes, I turned on the switch of the shower and turned the water boiling hot.Hot water was poured on my body, my skin gradually turned red, and slight pain spread, my body was obviously scalding terribly, but I didn't feel any warmth at all.Even pain is just a vague concept.

Holding the dagger, his calm mood floated slightly.The sharp blade reflected a delicate face, very familiar.I tugged at the corner of my lips, and the young man on the blade curved up abruptly.I looked into his beautiful amber eyes, but only saw a emptiness and silence, without any life.He was like a well-crafted puppet, staring at the blade stupidly.This is me now—as Gu Yuanyang?

There was a sudden pain in his hand, someone grabbed the dagger vigorously and threw it to the ground.The dagger fell to the ground with a crisp sound, and I was stunned for a moment.Looking up, I saw Yin Chuan standing aside with a hint of anger on his face.I wanted to pick up the dagger, but was tightly held in his arms by the man.

Yin Chuan's expression was extremely complicated, apart from anger, there was also a hint of fear.What is he afraid of?The arms that imprisoned me were very hard, as if trying to integrate me into the body.I felt a little uncomfortable and struggled a little.Why don't you let me go?Why should I be born again?Why... do I have to go through this thing that should have been abandoned and forgotten long ago?Why can't I have a brand new and complete life?

I turned my head and looked into Yin Chuan's pure black eyes.In those eyes that were once cold and heartless, now there are strange emotions that are suppressed.It was an emotion I couldn't read.I struggled to remember barren memories, recalling all fragmented memories except pain.I heard my almost mechanical, faint voice: "Master, is there anything else?"

"Yuanyang—I know you've remembered it. But you live well, okay?" Yin Chuan's voice was still low, but there was a kind of hoarseness, with a hint of pleading.I remembered?With his brain spinning, he finally understood the meaning of the words - it turned out that Yin Chuan in front of him was also reborn.We are all born again, but he comes before me.

The memory involuntarily drifts back to the time when Chu Chu died a long time ago.The body gradually annihilated in the flames, the tears on the face of the man in the ward—by the way, Yin Chuan loves me. "Love"?The empty soul thought blankly, what is that?