the world in which he exists

After agreeing to celebrate the New Year together, Gu Tao and Gu Chaoming had an unhappiness just as soon as he woke up.Gu Tao could no longer pretend to be a kind and good father, so he took off his mask of being kind to Gu Chaoming and sat in the living room watching TV for a while, before he opened the door and went out before having lunch.

Only Gu Chaoming's home was deserted, but it was more in line with his wishes.When Gu Chaoming walked out of the kitchen with the dishes, he found that the living room was empty, only the TV with too high volume was still playing alone.

Gu Chaoming doesn't want to treat himself badly during the New Year alone, and doesn't want to make himself look lonely.He prepared a lot of meals, set up the wooden table that was usually too troublesome, after carefully wiping it, took out the bowl mat that Qu Yingyi bought before and put it on the set up wooden table.

The bowl mats are in the shape of blooming flowers, and colorful flowers bloom on the temporary wooden table.

Set up the bowl mats and then serve the dishes prepared in the kitchen on the table one by one, so that a person should have a New Year's appearance when celebrating the New Year.

Looking at the sumptuous meals on the table, Gu Chaoming took out the fruit plate cleaned a few days ago on the coffee table, filled it with annual fruits, and took out another fruit bowl to fill it with fruit.

The fruit plate and fruit are on the table, and the tea table is full of Chinese New Year flavor.After preparing everything, the food on the table was steaming and waiting to be savored. Gu Chaoming set up a bowl and chopsticks for one person and pulled a chair to sit down, ready to start this year's Spring Festival lunch.

Holding the bamboo chopsticks with his fingers, holding the rice bowl with his left hand, facing a table full of sumptuous delicacies, Gu Chaoming was busy for a while. Sitting at the table, he should have been impatient to start, but he suddenly stopped moving, as if someone pressed the pause button .

The rice bowl in his hand hung down, and the weight of the chopsticks suddenly increased, so that Gu Chaoming couldn't lift it up and had to put it down.

The hanging wrist rested on the edge of the table, the rice in the rice bowl was cooked just right, as attractive as the dishes on the table, but Gu Chaoming had no appetite.

The sudden sense of loneliness made Gu Chaoming, who was trying to create a New Year atmosphere, unable to eat in the New Year atmosphere he created.

Looking at the table full of meals prepared by himself, no matter how attractive the color is, Gu Chaoming couldn't lift the heavy bamboo chopsticks.

Is this cheating?Trick yourself to Happy Chinese New Year?

The table full of innocent food became evidence that Gu Chaoming deceived himself.

The heat of the freshly cooked rice penetrated into Gu Chaoming's palm through the porcelain bowl.

Gu Chaoming always felt that there was something missing.

While he thinks that he is deceiving himself by creating the New Year's atmosphere and highlighting his loneliness, but he is still looking for what is missing, which makes his New Year's atmosphere always lack flavor.

What is missing?

Upstairs, the whole family was happy, while downstairs, Gu Chaoming faced a table full of meals.

Gu Chaoming turned his head to look in the direction of the coffee table, he knew where the problem was.

Gu Chaoming put down the bowls and chopsticks, pulled out the chair and walked to the TV.

As soon as the TV was turned on, the quiet living room was filled with human voices.Gu Chaoming returned to the dinner table, turned his head and ate while watching TV.

A well-prepared meal successfully redresses, restoring its original aroma.

I used to eat with my mother, and the TV was always on.

When washing the dishes after eating, Gu Chaoming remembered the wound on his finger.The band-aid given by the big wounded man stuck firmly on his finger, as if Lin Jianfan was reminding him: "Your finger is wounded, don't go into the water."

Gu Chaoming looked at the band-aid on his finger and smiled, picked up the glove by the sink and put it on.

The phone in my pocket vibrated several times while washing the dishes.Gu Chaoming washed the dishes and chopsticks, wiped his hands with a towel after tidying up everything, took out the vibrating mobile phone in his pocket and lay down on the sofa to read everyone's reply messages.

"Happy Chinese New Year, Mingming."

Seeing the words Mingming on the screen, Gu Chaoming couldn't help frowning. He heard Liu Yi call him Mingming verbally, but when he actually saw these two words in writing, Gu Chaoming felt a little ashamed.

"Did Brother Liu Yi bring his girlfriend home this time?" Gu Chaoming asked gossipingly.

After asking, he also sent out a squinting smile.

"What do you think?" Liu Yi replied, "You have heard about it, my mother said, no one in the community knows that I have a girlfriend."

"Hahahahaha... I want to see. Are you planning to get married? Can I be the best man?" Gu Chaoming asked.

"It's still early, don't think too much, just take it home and have a look." When Liu Yi returned home, he had to accept many interrogations from neighbors and relatives.

"Didn't you say you wanted to get married last time?"

"It's not so urgent to get married. She still wants to get married later. I want to ask you to be the best man, but you may have to take the college entrance examination at that time. You are very busy in the third year of high school. I'm afraid it will delay your study."

Gu Chaoming originally thought that he would be able to drink Liu Yi's wedding wine soon, but he didn't expect to have to wait until the third year of high school.Gu Chaoming has always been skeptical about marriage, but for Liu Yi, he really doesn't want to be suspicious, and hopes that he can truly achieve happiness.

Liu Yi is a gentle person, the green and good mood of Gu Chaoming's childhood.Gu Chaoming believes that he will be a considerate husband and a gentle father in the future.

After chatting with Liu Yi, Gu Chaoming suddenly felt sleepy while lying on the sofa, got up and went to the bedroom to sleep.

He fell into a deeper sleep, closed the curtains and did not know how long it would take until the phone on the table rang and Gu Chaoming woke up from his sleep.

The afternoon nap should not be too long, after waking up, Gu Chaoming felt more tired and sore than before sleeping.

Dazedly, he grabbed the phone to see who was calling, and saw the word "Mom" displayed on the screen. Gu Chaoming's fatigue was completely washed away by these two words in an instant, and his mind felt like never before. The speed is instantly awake.

The word "Mom" has the ability to make Gu Chaoming wake up instantly, and it also has the ability to make Gu Chaoming dare not answer the phone on the evening of the Spring Festival.

The phone call that I didn't know when I was looking forward to also brought a trace of inexplicable panic.

I don't know why I'm flustered, but the joy of seeing the word "mother" is followed by too much.

After hesitating and pressing the answer button again and again, Qu Yingyi's slightly anxious voice came from the other end of the phone.

The lights in the room were not turned on, and the winter night was already lingering outside the window, just waiting for him to open the curtains to lead the army in.

In the hazy darkness of the room, the light of the mobile phone illuminated Gu Chaoming's cheek.

Gu Chaoming turned on the speakerphone, and Qu Yingyi's slightly anxious voice spread throughout the room: "Chaoming?"

Gu Chaoming responded softly.

"Why didn't you answer the phone just now?" Qu Yingyi asked.

"I fell asleep and didn't hear it." Gu Chaoming said.

"Is your father at home?" Qu Yingyi's tone was anxious again.Calling Gu Chaoming, Gu Chaoming didn't answer the first time the bell rang, Qu Yingyi hurriedly called the second one, most afraid of what she imagined would happen.

She was afraid that Gu Tao would be at home, and that Gu Chaoming would not answer the phone because of Gu Tao.

"He's not at home." Gu Chaoming said.

Every time Qu Yingyi called him, no matter whether Gu Tao was at home or not, Gu Chaoming always told Qu Yingyi that "Gu Tao is not at home", he didn't want Qu Yingyi to worry.

"Gu Tao is not at home? Then you are at home alone for the New Year?" Qu Yingyi imagined the scene where other people's family was happy and her son was at home alone, Qu Yingyi felt more distressed and ashamed.

Distress and shame were transmitted to Gu Chaoming's side along the electric current, and to Gu Chaoming's dark room.Qu Yingyi's heartache and guilt could hardly be contained.

"It's okay, I..."

Gu Chaoming hides Gu Tao's violent words and actions towards him, and hides his loneliness.Gu Chaoming wanted to tell Qu Yingyi that it's okay for her to celebrate the New Year alone, it's okay, she doesn't have to worry.

As soon as the words came out, Qu Yingyi intercepted them: "Are you coming here? We haven't eaten yet, so come here."

"No more." Gu Chaoming was embarrassed to go to eat.

Qu Yingyi felt sorry for her son, but she couldn't find a way to make it up, so despite Gu Chaoming's repeated refusals, she insisted on letting him come over for dinner.

During the Chinese New Year festival when thousands of families are lit up, Qu Yingyi didn't want her son to sit alone at home.

Gu Chaoming didn't know how he agreed to have dinner with Qu Yingyi, maybe he couldn't bear the guilt of his mother spilling over the phone, maybe he really didn't want to experience the feeling of having a New Year's Eve dinner alone.

But is it really better to go to my mother's new husband's house for a New Year's Eve dinner than to watch the Spring Festival Gala alone at home?

Gu Chaoming didn't have an answer before he went out, and he also yearned for a lively New Year and a lively home.

The man drove to pick him up, but Gu Chaoming couldn't tell from his face whether he was unhappy or really welcomed him.When my mother got out of the car, she saw Gu Chaoming who had changed clothes and was waiting at the gate of the community. Thinking of him staying at home alone, she almost burst into tears.

Gu Chaoming smiled and showed her, and comforted her in his deadpan way: "Did you miss me?"

Seeing Yuanyuan again, the little girl came out to greet her in new clothes for the New Year.Knowing that Gu Chaoming is coming, Yuanyuan has been lying by the window since her father went out, waiting for her father's car to come back.

Seeing Brother Chaoming, Yuanyuan's short legs ran from the window to the door to meet Gu Chaoming.As soon as the door opened, he rushed to Gu Chaoming's arms who were about to enter.

"Do you remember me?" Yuanyuan smiled foolishly holding Gu Chaoming's thigh, and Gu Chaoming picked her up and asked.

"Brother Chaoming." Yuanyuan replied immediately.

"By the way, it's awesome!" Gu Chaoming praised her, and the little girl laughed even more happily.

"Brother, are you going to eat here?" Yuanyuan asked.

"That's right." Gu Chaoming answered Yuanyuan with his eyes bent, and the cute and enthusiastic child resolved his embarrassment in the new environment.

Yuanyuan was very face-saving, hugging his neck and kissing his cheek.

Being kissed by Yuanyuan on the cheek, Gu Chaoming still wanted to smile, but when he saw the old man walking down the stairs, his smile instantly changed to "four different looks".

The woman who came down the stairs made Gu Chaoming feel for the first time what it means to be ostracized in public.

Silent exclusion.

Yuanyuan smiled happily in Gu Chaoming's arms. The old man walked downstairs, although the expression on his face was smiling, but the disgust implied in his eyes and the corners of his mouth could not be ignored by the sensitive Gu Chaoming.

How much Gu Chaoming wished that his nerves would be a little more relaxed, and he would not see the rejection of the old man, so his life might be easier.

But life is not so much wish come true.

Gu Chaoming felt it, and so did Qu Yingyi.Gu Chaoming's arm holding Yuanyuan was stiff.

He was an outsider, an outsider that the old man did not welcome.

The old man didn't need Gu Chaoming to guess, as soon as she opened her mouth, Gu Chaoming knew it was the man's mother.

The voice that Gu Chaoming will never forget.

The old man's eyes and mouth hinted at disgust. He already knew that his son was going to pick up that woman's child for a New Year's Eve dinner, but she still walked down slowly and asked her son, "This is it?"

A question brought Gu Chaoming's self-esteem back to its original shape.

Who is this?

How could it be at my house?

I am not from this family.

I shouldn't be here.

Gu Chaoming ran wildly on the field where he fled.

Yuanyuan helped Gu Chaoming and said, "He is brother Chaoming."

"Brother Chaoming, that brother you mentioned before?" the old man asked Yuanyuan, reaching out to hug Yuanyuan in Gu Chaoming's hand.

As expected of a little nymphomaniac, she dared to slap her grandma in the face in public.The old man wanted to hug her, Yuanyuan hugged Gu Chaoming's neck and did not let go: "I want my brother to hug her."

The old man laughed a few times and looked at Gu Chaoming. Gu Chaoming guessed that he was asking what kind of ecstasy he gave her granddaughter to make her cling to you so much.

After taking a look at Gu Chaoming, the old man left, and Gu Chaoming returned to the world where he no longer accepts repulsive glances.

Before eating, Yuanyuan sat on him and played with him, playing with his fingers, playing with his hair, playing with his hair and clothes.

The New Year's Eve dinner at the man's house was sumptuous, a large table was filled with all kinds of aromas gathered together, but Gu Chaoming was tasteless, and felt full after eating a little.

Only a small part of the stomach is food, most of which are the discomfort of the new environment and the rejection of the elderly.

Gu Chaoming said he was full, but the old man also said to him: "How can you be full after eating such a little?"

After the meal, Gu Chaoming also had a share of the red envelope distribution activity. Gu Chaoming thought that he was just here for a meal, and he would not get any red envelopes, and he didn't want to accept them, but his mother persuaded him to accept them with her eyes, and Gu Chaoming reached out to accept them.

"Thank you." Gu Chaoming said after receiving the red envelope.

All night was acting, and all night was spent in discomfort and rejection.

Gu Chaoming didn't want to act any more. Not long after the New Year's Eve dinner, he told Qu Yingyi that it was too late and he wanted to go home.

Mother knew the look in the old man's eyes, and knew that Gu Chaoming was uncomfortable staying here.She asked Gu Chaoming to come here because she wanted Gu Chaoming to celebrate the New Year not so alone, but now Qu Yingyi wondered if she had done something wrong?

What I have done and what I am ashamed of Gu Chaoming can no longer be made up for.

After Gu Chaoming and Qu Yingyi said that they wanted to go home, Qu Yingyi also asked a man to take him home, but Gu Chaoming quickly refused.

"Farewell, it's too much trouble for him, and he drank wine at the dinner table." Gu Chaoming said.

"Then mother will send you off." Qu Yingyi said.

"Then send it to the door and tell them when I'm gone."

Gu Chaoming knew that he was leaving, and they would all come out to see him off, Gu Chaoming didn't want to see that kind of scene.

He just wanted to say goodbye to Yuanyuan.

"Brother is going back." Gu Chaoming said to Yuanyuan.

Yuanyuan held his finger and raised her head to look at him reluctantly: "Huh?"

"Brother is going home too, you have to be obedient."

"Okay." Gu Chaoming especially liked Yuanyuan's obedience.

It was agreed to deliver to the door, but Qu Yingyi wanted to send it further when she walked out of the door, but Gu Chaoming pushed her to let her go back.

"Yuanyuan is still waiting for you at home."

The mother was stubborn, so Gu Chaoming asked what he cared about: "Is the man treating you well?"

Almost every time I saw Qu Yingyi and Gu Chaoming, I would ask this question, wondering if she was doing well.

Qu Yingyi didn't answer. Gu Chaoming looked at Qu Yingyi. He didn't expect that there would be a second time when people around him cried unknowingly.

The last time it was with Lin Jianfan at the soup shop, this time it was my mother.

Hearing Gu Chaoming's question, and the fact that he called the place he was going to leave her home, Qu Yingyi couldn't help but shed tears.

She has been tormented by guilt and distress, especially when she sees the disgusting eyes of the old man.

I am sorry for him, and for my own happiness, I abandoned him.

I am an incompetent mother.

He was so incompetent that he made his son suffer so much, Qu Yingyi still didn't know how to make up for him.

Gu Chaoming couldn't see Qu Yingyi crying, Qu Yingyi's tears were a sharp knife that cut through his heart, Gu Chaoming comforted him in a panic, "Why are you crying so much?"

There was no tissue in his pocket, so Gu Chaoming could only wipe the crying Qu Yingyi's tears with his fingers.

The longer he stayed, the harder it was for him to leave. Gu Chaoming wiped away Qu Yingyi's tears and decided to leave immediately.

After walking a few steps, he turned around and waved, and said to Qu Yingyi who was still standing there: "I'm leaving, go in, it's cold outside."

After leaving the man's house, Gu Chaoming took a taxi for a long time in the winter night.

I didn't do anything all day but leaned tiredly on the car window and looked at the scenery outside the window.

The phone vibrated, Gu Chaoming turned it on, and a gorgeous firework exploded in the dark night sky outside the window, even the driver couldn't help driving the car to take a look.

The fireworks in the night sky came one after another, and the driver enjoyed the fireworks while driving, but Gu Chaoming in the car did not look at the beautiful scenery blooming outside the window, but stared at the phone screen.

The lighter in the mobile phone ignites the fuse, and the light of the fireworks illuminates the entire screen.

Gu Chaoming took out the earphones and put them on. He could hear Lin Jianfan's childlike laughter after the fireworks were lit.

The fireworks are gorgeous, shaking under the waving of Lin Jianfan's arms, and the lit fireworks illuminate Lin Jianfan's cheeks.

The fireworks outside the window were brilliant and colorful, and Gu Chaoming in the car was watching the small fireworks on the screen intently.

No matter how gorgeous the fireworks outside the window are, they can't compare with the "blossoming flowers" on the screen of the mobile phone.

In addition to the fireworks video sent by Lin Jianfan, Gu Chaoming also received a video of fireworks from Cen Xili in the Auspicious Three Treasures Group.

Cen Xili went back to his grandma's house for the New Year. He hadn't been there for many years. He kept sending them photos of his grandma's house and showing them things they hadn't seen before.

After the New Year’s Eve dinner, the children’s activity is to set off fireworks, and the adults sit around the house and chat.Cen Xili took a few "little soldiers" to the yard to set off fireworks.

Children go to bed early, Cen Xili is hardworking, he is in the fireworks display team, and he is also in the adults' New Year's Eve team.

After watching the Spring Festival Gala without dozing off at all, every house was crackling outside to welcome the New Year with firecrackers.

Just after zero o'clock in the group, there was a frenzy of messages, full of happy new year. Cen Xili ignored it and volunteered to set off firecrackers for the New Year's Eve.

"Here's a lot of courage, here you are." His cousin who was several years older than him said and handed him the lighter.

Cen Xili didn't light the firecrackers either, and when he walked to the tail of the firecrackers, the phone in his pocket suddenly rang.

Someone called him at the beginning of the new year?who is this

The New Year's firecrackers in other people's houses were almost finished, Cen Xili ignored the phone, pressed the lighter first, lit the fuse, and quickly ran to his cousin.

The lit firecrackers crackled, and Cen Xili took out his phone.

The first call of the new year is You Xin.

Exactly zero.

Cen Xili took a few glances and wanted to hang up.

Firecrackers sound everywhere, announcing the arrival of the new year, let's like a new person in the new year.

Cen Xili hung up the phone with such thoughts, but You Xin didn't allow him to give up and called again without interruption.

A soft heart is something that cannot be changed, Cen Xili looked at the phone that rang again.

Before the firecrackers were finished, he picked them up amidst the crackling, silent.

Amidst the sound of firecrackers, he vaguely heard You Xin saying to him, "Happy New Year, Xili."

Cen Xili froze on the spot, the sound of the explosion was isolated from another universe.

He dropped it too hard and picked it up too hastily.

He gave up less than a minute before picking it up again.

No, he just gave up and didn't decide not to like him anymore.