the world in which he exists

After a semester of hard work, Gu Chaoming doesn't have much ambition in terms of grades. He doesn't want to reach the sky in one step. He knows that he doesn't have such ability, but he at least hopes to achieve his lowest expected result.

Hard work pays off, Xu is the best compliment to Gu Chaoming.

423 points, more than 20 points more than Gu Chaoming's predicted highest score, Gu Chaoming couldn't believe it when he first saw the number 423.Check the simple three numbers again and again, I don't know how many times I have seen it.

After checking the answers with Lin Jianfan, Gu Chaoming estimated that the highest score for all the questions with uncertain scores was only a little over 370 points. The estimated stable score was around 50 points, but in the end it was 50 points higher than the estimated score. More points.Gu Chaoming didn't know which topics the [-]+ points came from, but it was like a good start for his upcoming winter vacation.

Yuanyuan's happiness is simple, a piece of biscuit, a piece of candy, and a merry-go-round ride can be easily obtained, and Gu Chaoming's happiness sometimes comes easily.

A good grade, Lin Jianfan's smile.

"Hey, Xinxueba, how does it feel to score [-]?" Su Bing walked to Gu Chaoming's table and patted Gu Chaoming on the back.

"Is it okay?" Gu Chaoming turned to Su Bing and asked, "Didn't you say to show us your real strength at the end of the term? I've seen it."

"I didn't make a mistake this time, next time, next time, see me next time."

Su Bing avoided the subject of his grades and smirked, but Gu Chaoming said sternly: "I'm not joking with you, didn't you say that we are going to the same university as Xili?"

"Xili, he must have improved again. I made a pure mistake this time."

Gu Chaoming looked at Su Bing in disbelief, and agreed to take the same university entrance examination together. Gu Chaoming didn't want to see nothing, and wanted to ask Su Bing if he had any background, but when he turned around, he saw Lin Jianfan coming in from the back door.

The worry on his face about whether he could be admitted to the same university in the future turned to seeing Lin Jianfan's smile.

Lin Jianfan was a peach-flavored candy, and when he saw him, the corner of Gu Chaoming's mouth was also peach-flavored.

"The teacher told you to go to the office." Lin Jianfan walked over and said to Gu Chaoming.

Lao Chen talked to a few students in the class who needed to be supervised, and Gu Chaoming was among them.

"This test is very good, with more than 400 points."

Lao Chen took out the report card from the folder and pointed it to Gu Chaoming to help him analyze it: "You are not bad in math this time, but you are almost..."

"Winter vacation is here, you have to study hard at home, don't fall behind..."

After some instructions, Gu Chaoming stood aside and listened quietly.

"Teacher, happy winter vacation." Gu Chaoming was in a good mood and said to Lao Chen before leaving.

"Happy winter vacation." Old Chen smiled.

Walking out of the office, the long corridor is covered with a quilt of sunshine.The flowers in the flowerbed under the corridor are withered, but the green leaves are still glowing with their tenacious vitality, and the white snow that lasts for several days stops on the path beside the flowerbed.

The most important people in his life, Su Bing, Cen Xili, and Lin Jianfan stood side by side in front of the fence in the corridor, chatting under the sunlight.

Su Bingming laughed the loudest, and his movements were exaggerated.Cen Xili complained about him, and Lin saw Fan standing aside without speaking and smiled faintly.

Hearing the footsteps behind them, and noticing Gu Chaoming's approaching figure, the three of them turned their heads to look at him, with smiles on their faces that were amused by Su Bing.

Su Bing waved at him broadly, telling him to come quickly, Cen Xili stood aside, Lin Jianfan smiled lightly and warmly.

Sunshine, green leaves, and snow come together.

All the people he loved were there, too.

This dreamlike scene made Gu Chaoming, who had been praised so much in the office, put a heater in his heart, warming his heart that had been cold for 17 years.

After meeting Lin Jianfan, his life became so beautiful that it was unbelievable.

During the one-month winter vacation, Gu Chaoming dreamed of this day several times, dreaming of the winter full of sunshine and green leaves.

Not just a winter vacation, but also the future.

Winter vacation is no better than going to school. Gu Chaoming has never seen Lin Jianfan since the vacation. Although he chats with him every day, his heart is always empty, like an inflated balloon, but it looks full on the surface.

There is always a voice in my heart saying: "You haven't seen him for many days."

In my heart, I automatically counted the days when I didn't see each other. Before the new year, Gu Chaoming was already looking forward to the start of school.

I seem to miss him a little bit.

Gu Chaoming was ashamed to admit it, but he knew that he missed him, and thought he must meet him.

I must find a reason to meet him, otherwise I will be too sad, Gu Chaoming thought.

The movie Su Bing made an appointment with was the best chance. Gu Chaoming asked Su Bing last night if he could take Lin Jianfan with him. Su Bing even took Cen Xili to "siege" him for a while.

"Of course, but the cinema will be lit up then." Su Bing said.

"?" Gu Chaoming didn't understand what he meant.

"The two one-kilowatt light bulbs of Xili and I are so bright that they can illuminate the entire movie theater."

"roll."

Su Bing also said: "Xili, when the time comes, we will buy two tickets sandwiched between them, and let them sit on both sides, and Gu Shuai will die in a hurry, hahaha..."

Gu Chaoming sighed at the screen, it's not easy for him to meet someone to watch a movie.

After sending Lin Jianfan a message inviting him to watch a movie, Gu Chaoming looked downstairs when he heard the sound of children playing outside.

The snow that fell a few days ago has not yet melted, and several children were playing snowball fights downstairs in thick cotton clothes.

The children downstairs were in high spirits, throwing snowballs at each other.

Gu Chaoming walked downstairs wrapped in the red scarf that Lin Jianfan gave him. Seeing the children playing snowball fights, he felt itchy and wanted to grab a handful of snow to play with.

As soon as I went downstairs, I saw Zhou Han coming out of the corner, and the children passing by who were having a snowball fight were almost accidentally injured by them.

Gu Chaoming grabbed a handful of snow on the ground, squeezed it into a ball, and threw it at Zhou Han.

The snowball hit Zhou Han's fluffy padded jacket and cracked, turning into scattered snow and falling to the ground.

Zhou Han avoided the children playing snowball fights, but did not avoid Gu Chaoming who looked mature but still had a childlike innocence playing snowball fights.

Gu Chaoming threw a snowball at him, and he grabbed a handful of Yuxue from the side of the road without hesitation.

Snowball ran towards Gu Chaoming who was standing in front of the unit building in the winter sun. After running away, Gu Chaoming grabbed a handful of snow and threw it at Zhou Han in retaliation.

Zhou Han also beckoned the group of children to come over to help: "Come here quickly, and help my brother besiege him."

Gu Chaoming also recruited a few "little brothers" to help him deal with Zhou Han.

The sun shone on Gu Chaoming's smiling face, and the white air exhaled from his mouth melted in the sun. His hands were red from the cold but he still persisted in smashing the snow in his hands into snowballs.

Two 17-year-old teenagers accompanied a few children, or several children accompanied their two 17-year-olds to fight in the snow for a while.

A few days after the snow fight, it was New Years Eve. On New Year's Eve, Gu Chaoming got up early as usual, got up, laid the quilt and opened the curtains, completing the actions that were repeated every morning.

Downstairs, someone else's window had a New Year's blessing posted on it. Gu Chaoming stood in front of the window, staring at the other person's window in a daze.The word "Fu" also caused collective rejection, and the people with "Fu" in the opposite building gathered to laugh at Gu Chaoming's deserted house.

Gu Chaoming closed the curtains in a fit of anger, and raised his hands to scratch his sleepy hair.

It's just the end of the year, and it's just an ordinary day. It's okay if the house is deserted.

There was noise from upstairs, and Gu Chaoming couldn't help but look at the door of his room that couldn't be closed.The wounds full of holes on the door panel have become a thing of the past. Unlike human wounds, the door panel is always open, revealing its unhealed scars to people.

In the past, on New Year's Eve, Gu Chaoming always woke up to the sound of ping-pong, and it was Qu Yingyi who was cooking.In normal days, Gu Chaoming can overcome sleepiness and get up to brush his teeth and wash his face to help, but on New Year's Eve he is always presumptuous, closing his eyes amidst the sound of the kitchen ping-pong-pong-pong-pong-pong-pong-pong and going back to sleep.

This year's Spring Festival, he can only wake up to the noisy preparations upstairs, look at the word "Fu" on the opposite building, and continue to listen to the noise upstairs.

Leaving his mother, he seems to have lost the capital of acting like a child, and opening his eyes is the ceiling of reality.

This is the scene that Gu Chaoming had imagined a long time ago, but it was hard to accept it for a while.Just after the winter vacation, I was ready to face the deserted New Year when I was alone. I didn’t expect Gu Tao to stay at home, but Gu Tao’s staying at home was no different from not being at home.

Those New Years that carry the smell of mother's food will never happen again, Gu Chaoming sat by the bed and turned his head to look at the drawn curtains.

The mobile phone on the desk lit up in the silent room, and a loud beep interrupted Gu Chaoming's discomfort with the completely different Spring Festival from the previous 16 years.

Gu Chaoming moved to the desk and picked up the mobile phone whose screen had not yet dimmed.

Meteors hit the earth, waves flooded villages, Gu Chaoming's discomfort in the early morning of the Spring Festival, it should be said that since Qu Yingyi left his life without prior notice, all the discomfort and grievances were split in that four-character message .

He is the fragments of planets crashing into Earth, the ruins of villages flooded by waves.All the discomfort and grievances hidden in the bottom of my heart were completely broken, revealing the mark left by hiding for too long.

Gu Chaoming's heart melted in those four words.

"Happy Spring Festival."

Lin Jianfan typed a lot of words on the sofa with his mobile phone in his arms and then deleted them. In the end, only these four words were left to celebrate the Spring Festival. It is most appropriate to send blessings during the Spring Festival. The rest... just wait.

Lin Jianfan stared at the screen and hesitated for a minute before clicking send. He never thought that he was the first person to say Happy Chinese New Year to Gu Chaoming, and he never thought that the person who received his message was going through his own experience. Great discomfort and grievance in life.

Gu Chaoming had no self-knowledge, he didn't know that his grievances could be accumulated so secretly and so much that he couldn't believe it.

He couldn't control his heart when he saw that the simple four words sent by Lin Jianfan were tightened by a pair of big hands like clothes.He couldn't help swallowing all the grievances he had suffered after losing his mother for a semester, and he couldn't control the tears in his rosy eyes.

His mother occupies an too important position in his life, his mother's sudden departure, his own being abandoned, and his whole life is suddenly empty.

The wind passed through the hall without taking anything away, because there was nothing to take away.

One person's departure is exchanged for another person's seat.Gu Chaoming was sitting alone in the movie theater, and his mother waved to him to open the door of the movie theater.His mother once went home specially on his birthday, and her figure was outlined by the bright and warm sunshine when he opened the door.It was the same when he left the theater of his life. In the dark theater, the door that Qu Yingyi opened was the only light besides the movie being shown.The dazzling light outlined Qu Yingyi's figure like it was on her birthday.

Qu Yingyi waved to him one last time, closed the door, the light disappeared, and the seat beside him was empty.

Gu Chaoming thought that the seat next to him would never be occupied, but he soon heard a knock on the door, a cautious knock on the door.

It took him a long time to open that door.

He sat back on his seat, turned his head and there was already a person sitting next to him, a boy with a handsome face and serious speech.

This is also very good, Gu Chaoming looked at the boy's side face and smiled, he hoped that he would not leave the meeting halfway, he hoped that he could watch the movie with him.

His entire life was projected on the giant movie screen.

Seeing the four words "Happy Chinese New Year" sent by Lin Jianfan, Gu Chaoming's throat rolled with soreness. Tears flowed in his eyes like small streams, and behind the streams was the vast ocean in his heart.

Gu Chaoming succeeded in controlling his emotions and did not shed tears during the Spring Festival, even though his eyes were already red, even though the tears hit his eye sockets.

He never knew that he was so fragile that he could be easily defeated with just four words.

Hearing the continuous noise upstairs, Gu Chaoming sat on the edge of the bed with red eyes and looked up at the ceiling on the early morning of the New Year's Eve. Lin saw Fan Wei smiling, and Gu Chaoming followed him with a slight twitch of his mouth. rise.

Human beings are complex animals, they can be sad when they are extremely happy, they can have fun when they are suffering, and they can also smile with red eyes.

"Happy Spring Festival."

thank you for your good wishes.

After replying to Lin Jianfan’s message, Gu Chaoming also sent Spring Festival greetings to Su Bing and Cen Xili, and after sending messages to them, he also sent blessings to Zhou Han and some friends and classmates, and finally returned to Qu Yingyi’s contact page, Gu Chaoming hesitated or clicked to exit.

He flinched for some reason, his mother had already divorced Gu Tao, so let her be cut off completely, and he would seldom contact her.

Qu Yingyi never thought that her son would think so.

Gu Tao didn't get up until he was about to eat lunch. The richer breakfast than usual was already cold. Gu Tao lifted the vegetable cover and looked at it. He was not in the mood to eat. While getting dressed, he walked to the kitchen and said to Gu Chaoming in a lazy voice just after getting up. : "Eat early, I'm hungry."

Gu Chaoming didn't answer, just kept silent.Gu Tao zipped up his clothes by the kitchen door, but he didn't hear Gu Chaoming's response. He hated what others said to him the most. It used to be like this, and it's like this now.

"Are you dumb?" I don't know if he didn't wake up or his nature was exposed again, Gu Tao's tone brought the previous violence again.

This is the tone Gu Chaoming is used to.

Gu Tao being nice to him is too weird, it's the snow in summer, it's a scene that people can tell something is wrong just by looking at it.

"I asked you if you are dumb?" Gu Tao took out the cigarette case from his pocket, shook out one, but did not light it, and did not hear Gu Chaoming's answer.

Gu Tao asked again: "I asked you if you are dumb?"

Press the lighter, the flame jumps out, the cigarette gets closer, and the sparks of the red-hot cigarette butt converge.Gu Chaoming was chopping vegetables for lunch, and could smell Gu Tao's smoke in the air.

Gu Tao lit a cigarette and approached, exhaling a puff of smoke.The smell of smoke cannot escape in the small and closed kitchen, and travels in the air of the kitchen.

Gu Chaoming cared about chopping vegetables by himself, Gu Tao saw that Gu Chaoming didn't answer, and flicked the soot accumulated on the cigarette butt with his fingers.After flicking the ash, he didn't put the cigarette into his mouth immediately, but held the cigarette butt and looked at the cigarette in his hand inexplicably.

Gu Chaoming, who was chopping vegetables, took a step back and retracted his hand just by looking at the cigarette.

The shadow of childhood is a monster, a subconscious escape that the body can never forget.

Gu Chaoming's heart warmed by Lin Jianfan's Spring Festival blessing fell to the bottom of the cellar of memories.

The body retreated, the palm retracted, Gu Tao pinched the cigarette butt and didn't understand what Gu Chaoming was doing all of a sudden.

Gu Tao laughed at Gu Chaoming's subconscious movements: "Your legs are cramping?"

Not answering is the shortest time, Gu Tao's patience after waking up is exhausted little by little in Gu Chaoming's silence.

"I don't want to swear at people because of the New Year's Eve." Gu Tao shook the cigarette ash again, and poked Gu Chaoming's head with his finger.

Gu Tao also wanted to be kind to Gu Chaoming, he thought it was good to take Gu Chaoming to eat desserts that he thought young people liked, and his kindness to Gu Chaoming was to take him home and inherit his property.Gu Tao never felt that there was anything wrong with what he did, and he also felt that Gu Chaoming didn't listen to him, which was too worrying.

Little do they know that a child is not a sponge, it can return to its original shape after being pinched, and a hole burned in the clothes cannot be seen without sewing another new piece of cloth. Gu Tao has never reflected on the imprint he left on Gu Chaoming's heart, but Blame Gu Chaoming for being too rude to him.

I magnify the little bit of kindness towards him thousands of times, and forget about the violence I have towards him.

Upstairs was the lively New Year's noise, and downstairs was Gu Chaoming's head tilted to the side by Gu Tao.

Has life really changed for the better?Will life really get better?

Is it just his illusion that life is getting better little by little?With Gu Tao around, it seemed like his life would never get better.

So what if Gu Tao disappears forever?

Gu Chaoming, whose head was poked to one side, was startled again by the idea that appeared in his mind. It was not the first time he had this idea, but he was shocked every time.

He was thinking about how to make a person disappear, disappear from his world.

Terrifying and comforting thought.

Scary is the prison of red blood and the future.

Shu Shuang is to escape from Gu Tao's life forever.

Gu Chaoming was fortunate that the horror was still at the top and did not make him lose his mind.The person he wished to disappear was by his side, and in his hand was a sharp kitchen knife.

The green vegetables were cut into two sections, the head was poked to one side, and the knife was raised and dropped.

The smell of blood, the color of blood, the red liquid.

A red liquid flowed out from Gu Chaoming's fingers, staining the water droplets on the vegetables red.

The water drops turned light red, but Gu Chaoming's fingers were still red with blood.

After realizing the pain in his fingers, Gu Chaoming threw down the kitchen knife, and Gu Tao, who was beside him, walked out of the kitchen, went to the room and took out the box of Band-Aids that Lin Jianfan gave him in the drawer.

"Be sure to stick it after injury." Lin Jianfan's instructions were still in his ears.

"No post."

"paste."

The disputes in the past are vivid, and it is also happy to argue over a small matter.

Gu Chaoming didn't want to post it, and he had to go back to the kitchen to cook later, but the big owner of the band-aids asked him to post it, so he had to post it.

Open the band-aid box, tear off one and stick it carefully.In the past, he just pasted it casually, but he still had to tear it off in the end anyway, but Lin Jianfan put on the band-aid, and he put it on very carefully.

After sticking it up, stand up the injured finger and look at the flat bandage on the finger.

He will stick to it all the time, as if Lin Jianfan is with him, and we can meet tomorrow, which gives him a little hope in life.

Looking at the Band-Aid on his finger, the noise from upstairs continued, and Gu Tao turned on the TV in the living room again. Gu Chaoming understood a truth on New Year's Eve before the New Year and the old year.

Life is always good, everything is always alive, and the sun is always shining.

It just depends on whether you are thinking of Gu Tao or Lin Jianfan.