the world in which he exists

The cold wind was howling, and it was not yet night, but just after lunch, the sky outside the window had quickly turned gloomy.

If it is summer, I am afraid that there will be a storm, but in winter such weather is no surprise.The weather outside the window was gloomy. Gu Chaoming stood in front of the open wardrobe, holding the door with both hands, thinking about which coat to wear to meet Lin Jianfan today.

Qu Yingyi told him outside the amusement park to pay attention to check the clothes, not to be signed by Gu Tao. Gu Chaoming had already got them, and they hung in the closet and haven't worn them much this year.

The clothes in the closet were not complicated, and they were neatly arranged. Gu Chaoming stared at the few cotton clothes hanging in the closet for a long time, and then picked up the last cotton coat that his mother bought for him that he hadn't worn much.

After putting it on, I went to the toilet and replaced it with a new mirror, and looked at myself in the mirror to see if it fit.

The clothes Qu Yingyi bought fit well, neither too big nor too small.When the courier told him that there were so many packages, Gu Chaoming was really surprised.After signing for the receipt, I took home one by one and hung them carefully in the closet, and called Qu Yingyi to tell Qu Yingyi that the clothes had been received, and told her not to buy so many clothes, as he still had enough to wear.

The style of the cotton-padded jacket is simple, with an embroidery pattern on the chest. The position of the embroidery is slightly different from the position of the school badge on the school uniform. Gu Chaoming stood in front of the mirror, stroking the embroidered logo with his palm.

Under the logo is a beating heart.

"You hit Lin Jianfan's heart."

Gu Chaoming looked at himself in the mirror, feeling the logo made of silk threads on his fingers, Gu Chaoming couldn't help but smirked at the mirror.

It's kind of like a date.

The warm winter sun, the almost clear feelings, and the smile on the corner of the boy's mouth are all bright.

Xu Dongfeng was also infected by Gu Chaoming's smile, and the darkened sky became surprisingly bright.

After changing clothes, it was cold, Gu Chaoming was going to go out wearing a scarf.

The scarf was in the living room, and Gu Chaoming tidied up his clothes and peeked out of the open toilet door.

Gu Tao was watching his favorite skit program loudly in the living room, and the funny jokes from the TV came in through the crack of the door.

The skit was funny, but Gu Chaoming didn't have the slightest intention to listen to it. He packed his bags and sent a message to Lin Jianfan saying that he had to go out early.

After sending the message, he put the mobile phone into the pocket of the padded jacket, Gu Chaoming tugged at the collar of the padded jacket, and pushed open the open toilet door.

In the midst of such loud laughter, Gu Tao could still clearly hear the slight sound of Gu Chaoming pushing the door open. Sitting on the sofa, he turned his head and saw Gu Chaoming pick up the scarf hanging in the living room and put it on.

Gu Tao saw him wearing a scarf and asked, "Are you going out?"

"En." Gu Chaoming put on a scarf and answered coldly, then opened the door.

Closing the door, facing the cold wind, the process of going out was easier than Gu Chaoming expected.

Gu Tao can go out so smoothly at home, Gu Chaoming feels like he is in a dream.

In a good dream.

In the ordinary dream, there is only the figure of Gu Tao with his fangs and claws, the butcher knife he has dropped, and the police siren that lights up afterwards.

On the day after the fight with Yu Hangwei, Gu Chaoming had a dream.

A dream like a dream.

In the dream, the flowers are fragrant and fragrant, yellow, white, blue, red, purple... compete with each other, and they are all fluttering in the gentle wind.

A path was secluded among the swaying flowers, Lin saw Fan standing at the end of the path slowly walking towards him, and whispered in his ear: "You are not the same person as Gu Tao."

At the end of the path, the sun is shining brightly, the breeze is just right, and the spring flowers are blooming.

He came from the light source, all covered in rays of light.

With him, the dream will be bright.

The Christmas atmosphere is strong on the street, and there are young couples holding hands and shopping everywhere.Every couple's faces are filled with sweet smiles from you and me.Gu Chaoming walking alone on the street looked very special, fortunately there were not so many people on the street in the afternoon.

Decorative Christmas snowmen and Christmas trees are displayed in most shop windows.There are English glass stickers with Merry Christmas on the window, and a decorated Christmas tree stands in the central square, with small electric lights hanging on it.

It should be bright at night, Gu Chaoming walked under the Christmas tree and thought.

He took a picture of the Christmas tree and sent it to Lin Jianfan, telling him that he was waiting for him under the tree. Lin Jianfan replied: "I'll be right there."

Lin Jianfan is a person who can't lie, he said that he will be there soon, and within 3 minutes, Gu Chaoming saw Lin Jianfan trotting over among the crowd exuding the unique sweetness of Christmas.

"Here." Gu Chaoming waved his hand to Lin Jianfan who came running, and the same white breath came out of his open mouth as Lin Jianfan exhaled from the tip of his nose when he was running.

The weather is too cold, and one bite is the proof of winter.

Seeing that Gu Chaoming was waving at him not far away, Lin saw Fan excitedly waving at him and speeding up to Gu Chaoming.

"Why are you running? Do you want to see me so quickly?" Gu Chaoming raised his hand to care for Lin Jianfan's messy hair because of running.

When I asked this question, it seemed that he was not the one who ran to Lin Jianfan because he wanted to see Lin Jianfan sooner, but couldn't control the cells of his whole body.

"Well," Gu Chaoming was still playing with Lin Jianfan's messy hair, Lin Jianfan nodded, "I want to see you soon."

With a nod and an affirmative sentence, Gu Chaoming's hands were hanging in the air as he helped Lin Jianfan tidy up his wind-blown hair.

It must be because of the sweet smell of Christmas, my heart sneaked away, and my arms stiffened for a moment.

The white air exhaled from the mouth is the best proof of winter, and the stiff arms and the beating of the heart are the best proof of liking someone.

Gu Chaoming smiled.

Seeing that Fan was serious and nodding, "I want to see you soon" is the best proof that he also likes himself.

I want to see you soon, I am very happy to be with you.

The same goes for me, Gu Chaoming looked at Lin Jianfan, Christmas is really a heart-pounding holiday.

The hand hanging in the air fell to cover Lin Jianfan's head, and the dropped palm rubbed Lin Jianfan's freshly tidy hair.

Gu Chaoming smiled: "Me too, so I went out early."

28:[-].

The time they meet under the Christmas tree.

three o'clock.

They agreed on a time to go out.

The Christmas tree in the central square was not lit, but their eyes looking at each other were lit.

Ever since Lin Jianfan appeared in the crowd exuding a sweet breath, Gu Chaoming noticed that today Lin Jianfan was wearing a black padded jacket that he hadn't seen before, with a black hood on the back.

black.

The same color as your padded jacket.

There is a bit of similarity.

Gu Chaoming exhaled white air from the tip of his nose, and took off the scarf around his neck.

The scarf is a warm thing in winter, wrapping around Lin Jianfan's neck warmly with the warmth of Gu Chaoming's body.

The fingertips slid across the back of Lin Jianfan's neck when he was adjusting the scarf, and he had already touched it many times, but this inadvertent small touch still caused two pieces of skin to burn together and two hearts to beat together.

Gu Chaoming touched the soft scarf with his fingers, and said softly, "I'm hot, I'll wear it for you when you're cold."

Under the tall Christmas tree on the side of the road, Lin Jianfan felt the warmth of the scarf around his neck, the white breath out of his mouth, the cold air around him, the sound of traffic on the road and the sound of publicity on the street, and in front of him was the sound of what he wanted to do. I met Gu Chaoming earlier.

"Why don't you go out wearing more clothes, it's cold today, don't you check the weather forecast?" Gu Chaoming softly "blame" Lin Jianfan, and took Lin Jianfan's hand.

Seeing that Fan still wanted to flinch, Lin saw that Gu Chaoming grabbed the retracted finger.Gu Chaoming lowered his head to check Lin Jianfan's long fingers, checking for signs of frostbite.

Lin Jianfan's fingers didn't seem to show any signs of frostbite, but Lin Jianfan's fingers were still cold without frostbite.

Gu Chaoming held Lin Jianfan's cold hand and rubbed it in his own to keep warm.Although this small action has not yet gained a truly formal name, Gu Chaoming's heart has been warmed by Lin Jianfan's cold fingers.

After letting go of Lin Jianfan's hand, Gu Chaoming took out the prepared gloves from his pocket and handed them to Lin Jianfan: "Put them on, don't get frostbite."

Lin Jianfan raised his eyes to look at Gu Chaoming who handed out his gloves but didn't wear them himself.

Noticing Lin Jianfan's gaze, Gu Chaoming explained: "I don't suffer from frostbite, and I'm not afraid of the cold."

Before Lin Jianfan took the glove, Gu Chaoming "impatiently" stuffed a glove into Lin Jianfan's hand, lifted Lin Jianfan's other hand and forcefully put it on.

"Put it on for me, don't get frostbite."

"Thank you." Lin Jianfan said.

Gu Chaoming put on the gloves again and said, "Thank you, thank you. Your elder brother gave it to you. You can keep it, younger brother. You have chilblain, and my elder brother feels distressed when he sees it."

"Understood, brother." Lin Jianfan looked down at Gu Chaoming as he put on another glove.He buried his head lower, and secretly smiled.

"What's your name, big brother? Call me...forget it."

morning.

The word Chaoming had already reached the edge of his mouth, and was swallowed again.

Ever since he found out that Lin Jianfan still called him by his full name, Gu Chaoming superficially persuaded himself that there was nothing wrong with it, but a knot still formed in his heart.

Hope to hear Lin Jianfan call himself.

morning.

"Then I'll call you Doraemon." Lin Jianfan said with a smile.

"Doraemon?"

"Didn't you distribute flyers in Doraemon's doll costume?"

Recalling that night, the scorching heat that was completely opposite to the current severe cold, the pair of slender fingers first entered the eyes.

"That's like the first time I've seen you."

Gu Chaoming tried his best to avoid Gu Tao that night, and only recalled the first encounter with Lin Jianfan.

"That's right," Lin Jianfan said, "Doraemon also has any door and a universal pocket, which can make Nobita happy, just like you, it can make me happy."

"Then you are Nobita, Nobita No. [-] in the grade, hahaha..."

"Then you are my Doraemon." Lin Jianfan said.

Gu Chaoming looked at Lin Jianfan, and Lin Jianfan raised his eyes.

Both eyes looked at each other.

Under the Christmas tree, in the cold winter wind, in the festival filled with sweetness and heartbeat.

Doraemon proposed to take a photo under the tree, but Nobita did not refute.Doraemon gave the phone to Nobita, saying that Nobita's technology is good for Nobita to take pictures.

A click.

Freeze the moment of beautiful laughter in winter.

Traveling on Christmas without purpose and reason, the two tacitly walked on the street full of lovers.

The street was busy, Gu Chaoming looked down at Lin Jianfan who was beside him, and secretly glanced at his hand hanging peacefully by his leg.

Gu Chaoming walked very close to him, with the back of his hand separated from the winter wind, as long as he stretched out his hand to hold the hand that he put on the glove on, he could break the icy winter wind.

But Gu Chaoming finally held back.

He held back.

He looked at Lin Jianfan's palm that was close at hand, and he thought about whether he could really become the self that he affirmed after holding it?Can I accept the consequences of my actions?

He didn't want to and wouldn't hold Lin Jianfan's hand easily, and wouldn't say that sentence easily.

He doesn't have Lin Jianfan's brains, Lin Jianfan's outstanding grades, and Lin Jianfan's stunning appearance. He knows that these may not be problems, and it's okay if he doesn't have them, but all he has is Gu Tao's violence, and even his ability The father who brought him disaster.

When Gu Chaoming made a promise to a person and became a definite relationship, he had a firmness different from ordinary people and an ulterior cowardice.

If he can't give the other party a definite answer, he will never say it.This determination and cowardice is due to his father - Gu Tao.

Influenced by him for 17 years, Gu Chaoming's attitude towards promises to others and feelings is more fancy than others.

He doesn't want to have feelings that are lost because of his impulsive confession, he doesn't want to agree to any request or respond to any emotion because of his lack of consideration, and he doesn't want to let others down because of his ignorance.

He was afraid that his emotions would end because he didn't see himself clearly at the beginning, or because of violent factors that he couldn't control.He was afraid that his embarrassment would not give the other party what they wanted, even the basic courage to face the world.

In the final analysis, it was still my cowardice, my uncertainty about myself, but I saw clearly my unbearable place.

The most important thing is that Gu Chaoming doesn't want to be the same person as Gu Tao, and doesn't want to disappoint others and his own feelings. If he doesn't want to disappoint, then think clearly before making a promise.

He understands his determination and cowardice, and at the same time, he cannot deny that his heart wants to hug Lin Jianfan, hold his hand, and possess him.

Think of a heart about to burst.

He understands his feelings for Lin Jianfan, the long river of peace will eventually come to an end, the cold winter will eventually usher in spring, and the youth's mind will eventually be bright.

Gu Chaoming understands that his heart is hot, he can't help but fall into it, he can't control his following eyes to Lin Jianfan, he can't control himself to say those crooked words to Lin Jianfan.

He couldn't control his heartbeat.

He knew that he didn't simply like him, nor could he give up easily. When he thought of losing him because he gave up and kept silent, Gu Chaoming felt as sad as losing the scorching sun and sunset.

It's like falling back to the previous muddy hell.

He is struggling, he is yearning, he wants to have him.

He wants to accompany him for the rest of his life.

Since I was 17 years old.

The author has something to say: the number of words is a bit small today, tomorrow will be Christmas~(≧▽≦)/~

感谢在2020-03-0116:12:14~2020-03-0211:41:30期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel of irrigation nutrient solution: 10 bottles of teeth; 419370732 bottles;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!