Cupid winks

Had a dream and woke up. "

I said, "Nightmare?"

My mother said: "I dreamed that I was in the attic of my hometown, looking at the yard downstairs, and saw you and Xiuxiu running out, so I told your dad that he was right next to me, and I said, go and call him." Come back, you call Haowen back, Xiuxiu is insane, you can't go with her!"

My mother said: "The house was sold to a restaurant group, and it will become a membership-only restaurant in the future."

I said, "Pretty good."

I want to say that Xiuxiu is not crazy.Xiuxiu was just not like her mother, and unlike any girl her mother came into contact with.When she was young, she caught earthworms, lured ants, fluttered dragonflies, raised spiders, raised snakes, rolled in muddy fields, climbed trees to catch fish, and feared neither heaven nor earth. When she grew up, she was always full of mud and didn’t want to laugh. She doesn’t laugh when she’s in trouble, she screams when she wants to scream, she runs away when she wants to run, she doesn’t care about environmental protection, the widowed elderly in nursing homes, or autistic children, she doesn’t have much love to give other people.

But she also wears makeup, wears skirts, wears different perfumes every day, wears high heels, goes to art exhibitions, and listens to operas. She listens carefully and never falls asleep. She pays attention to whether the glass makes enough noise when clinking glasses. Crisp and melodious.

The craziest thing she's ever done, probably gave me a vase and smashed it herself.

No, there is one more thing, she took off the wedding ring and threw it away, causing Shuxue and I to search for it in the snow for a long time.The ring fits well on Shu Xue's left little finger.

While Shu Xue was asleep, I secretly measured the size of his left ring finger. I went to buy a new ring, and I wanted to give it to him.I dare not give it to him.I'm afraid he'll throw the ring away too, I'm afraid he'll give it back to me.He is wearing Xiuxiu's ring now. If he wants to throw it away or return it, I will tell him, this is Xiuxiu's ring. If you want to throw it away, you have to tell her. If you want to return it, you should return it to her.I will tell him this...

Oh shit.

damn it.

Why do I think of him again, he is sitting very close to me, so close, I can see him as soon as I turn around, why do I still think of him?I was thinking of someone I couldn't see when I turned around.Xiuxiu, mother, father, Zhan Jia, Xu Yanchen, grandma, Fu Yunsheng...

Fu Yunsheng...

Yes, Fu Yunsheng.

One year, Xiuxiu and I went back to our hometown to visit my grandmother. My mother didn’t know, but Xiuxiu suggested it. She was obsessed with miniature models at that time, and wanted to find an ancient Qing Dynasty building as a model. I thought of my grandmother’s old house.

Fu Yunsheng is a gardener hired by his grandmother to fertilize the flowers and plants at home and trim branches.He is not only a gardener, he also delivers food part-time, sells tickets for concerts and fan meetings part-time, has [-] friends and [-] groups on WeChat, and his phone number is posted everywhere in his husband’s house On the wall, flushing the toilet, repairing the air conditioner, everything can be done.His dream is to eat enough every day, get enough sleep every day, and have someone to refresh himself when he wants to sit and love.The ideal arranged by his family is to inherit the mantle of his father's generation and become a famous actress all over the country.

Xiuxiu said that Shu Xue resembled him a bit, she shook her head, no, it was him and Shu Xue.

I didn't want Shuxue, why does he always come out by himself?he……

He and I, we accompanied Hehe's mother to chemotherapy, went downstairs to smoke together, and when I went shopping, he exchanged WeChat with another man.

Oh shit.damn it.

Can't I think of something else?I have to think of something else.let me think about it...

Isn't it enough for Shu Xue to sit so close to me?Isn't it enough that he lives with me?He shook my hand, sat in my car, drank the Coke I had, used the chopsticks I used, wore my clothes and no clothes, walked from the bathroom to the bedroom, fell on the bed, hugged me, whatever I hug, isn't that enough?Whoever he chats with, and whoever he is intimate with, let him go, as long as he is happy.To make others happy.Don't be too greedy, Ye Haowen, don't be too greedy.

My mother said that contentment is always happy.

Xiuxiu said, it's all your mother's fault. If you believe in God so well, such a young child will go to church all day long, listening to stories of selfless dedication, forgiveness, repentance, forgiveness, and gratitude.

Xiuxiu also said, Ye Haowen, if you are too kind to others, you are allowing them to do evil, you know?She said, I'm going to find Shuxue, and tell him I'm sorry, I'm sorry for him, it's all your fault, you gave me an illusion, an illusion that I seem to lose you.But have I ever owned you?I don't have it, you are merciful to me, you are so merciful to people.

I said that someone has said similar things to me before.

Xiuxiu looked at me.I said, Fu Yunsheng.

Xiuxiu sat down angrily and amusedly, and said, "That lunatic!"

Yes, let me continue to think about Xiuxiu and our conversation. That day Sun Yu’s performance in Rongshi ended, we went to eat hot pot, we, that’s us, and then we went home, yes, that’s what happened.That's all I want.Xiuxiu said that she doesn't know how Fu Yunsheng is doing now.

She put on a strange expression and asked me, what did he say about you?

I said, he said that my kindness to people is pampering others, which is a very bad thing, and that I gave him an illusion.But he also said, who cares, love is an illusion.

Xiuxiu laughed loudly, she said, in advance, I have no objection to him, maybe your boyfriend at that time, what was his name...

Ke Linfeng.

Xiuxiu said, the name of the good soil, Yushu Linfeng.

I said, you are not much better, Zhong Lingyuxiu.

Xiuxiu said, oh, I'll tell Sun Yu, you said his name is Tu.

I laughed, and she laughed too, she was crying earlier, I remember, she said she was going to apologize to Shuxue.

Xiuxiu and Shu Xue got so close that my memory of her was always colored by Shu Xue.Pale and red, somewhere between mourning and joy.Aren't funerals and happy events the sum of all human emotions?

What else did Xiuxiu say?There must be something that has nothing to do with Shuxue, let me think about it, by the way, she asked me, how did you do it, all your exes remember so clearly?

I said, I often eat ginkgo.

Xiuxiu rolled her eyes and said, maybe Xiao Ke has a big opinion on Fu Yunsheng. What I want to say is that I often feel that he will die in the next second.Her eyes suddenly became blank. Did she think of Shu Xue? Fu Yunsheng is similar to Shu Xue. Maybe she thought that Shu Xue might die in the next second.She left home.She went to find Shuxue and said sorry to him.

Are Fu Yunsheng and Shu Xue really similar?

Their surnames are equally rare, they...

I don't want to think about Shuxue anymore, I can think about others, I have the spare power.

※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※

I have something to do tomorrow, so I can't update it. I will update it on Saturday.



Alright alright.

Where did Fu Yunsheng and I meet?Yes, we met at my grandmother's old house.The branches and leaves of the jujube tree in the yard were too vigorous, and the branches protruded aggressively into the eaves of the second floor. Grandma hired two gardeners to trim them, and Fu Yunsheng was one of them.Grandma also needs them to prune the vines. The vines are next to a snow-white flower stand. In summer, the green leaves are spread out on the shelf, forming a natural sunshade roof, which is cool and comfortable to stand under.

There is a similar flower stand downstairs in the inpatient department of the First Affiliated Hospital of Rongshi University, but what grows around the flower stand is not grapes, but wisteria.When the wisteria blooms, it is also the time when the weather starts to heat up. The flowers bloom very densely, falling from the gaps in the flower racks, falling from the branches, one after another, the sun can't penetrate, can't penetrate, and occasionally sneaks in. The gap fell on Shuxue's face...

How did Fu Yunsheng and I meet?Fu Yunsheng had a rope tied around his waist and a safety buckle on his belt. He stepped on a branch with one foot and stood at a very high place on the tree.A cigarette fell at my feet.I looked up at him.Fu Yunsheng smiled, pointed to his mouth, gestured apologetically, and said, "Help me get it up."

I said, "I climbed up?"

He said, "You go to the second floor."

I walked to the second floor. He was standing very close to the tree trunk. When he saw me, he pushed aside a branch and walked in front of me through the dense green leaves.At his feet was a very thin branch.I said, "Be careful."

He said: "Borrow a fire, the smoke goes out."

I handed him the cigarette, and he bent down to bite the cigarette and raised his eyes to look at me.The leaves rustle, the leaves are so loud in the wind, the same sound as the waves, the same sound as the waves.His eyes are like two mirrors, reflecting the bright and green summer.People's eyes are also like mirrors, which always reflect their own feelings.

I took out my lighter and lit a cigarette for him. I said, "It's not good to smoke while trimming trees, isn't it? It's easy to catch fire, right?"

He laughed, exhaled the cigarette, and asked me: "Then you still help me light the cigarette?"

I said, "You asked for it."

He smiled even more happily: "Are you Nobita's Doraemon? Respond to your request?"

I laughed, and he said, "I want to have dinner with you tonight, will you agree?"

The leaves started to ring again, the sound of the waves came again, Fu Yunsheng was shaking in the green waves, I stretched out my hand, grabbed his wrist, and said, "Be careful."

He pulled me forward, pushed me back, turned around and got behind the leaves, back among the branches.

He is not afraid, he is not afraid of anything.He is not afraid of wind, food and sleep, of being homeless, of being abandoned by relatives, and of being alone. He is alone, unencumbered, and happy at ease.But he is afraid of being alone.Terrified.He would hug me and say, Ye Haowen, just let me hug you all the time.He would also tell me, you go, it doesn't matter, everyone will die alone anyway.

Shu Xue in Wisteria