It turns out that no one survives in love

Some people want to keep time, some people want to quickly forget, but time never gives sashit.

The days are always going on, Mr. Liang got his wish and set up the position of "economic consultant" with the company investigated in Shanghai, and he can only prepare to move there after the Ph.D. defense.His girlfriend has been upgraded to a fiancee and has also found a job in a bank in Shanghai, starting in the fall.The young couple was very happy, thinking about inviting everyone to dinner and singing K.Sister Ye’s prenatal examination showed that she was twins, and her brother-in-law’s family was overjoyed. Sister Ye has become a rare giant panda in their family. Under Sister Ye’s strong request to prevent prenatal depression, the family reluctantly agreed to her going to work, but every morning , lunch, get off work, pick up and drop off three times.Teacher Cao's project is also progressing smoothly, and has entered the writing stage. Everyone in the institute is very happy.

Including Lin Rui.Lin Rui also has a lot of "progress". . .He went to the school hospital to have his teeth whitened, and bought some lighter-colored clothes again. Although they were still clean and simple, a sky blue T-shirt paired with simple khaki shorts was always better than the black one before.He already looked small, but now he looked more like a seventeen or eighteen-year-old high school student.Qin Yue accompanied him to buy the formal clothes, and also gave him a few shirts by the way. His wish to make him a white-collar elite could not be realized, because his face was neither sharp nor mature enough.But at least he looked like a freshman in the workplace.When summer came, Lin Rui started to go to the activity room every morning to swim and change his lines.He secretly drafted a plan, listing 20 tasks to change his self-image.Every time he completes an item, he feels closer to Haiming.People in secret love always have a common problem, no matter men, women, young or old, they always feel that they are not good enough for each other, and feel that when they become better, they will get closer and closer to each other.The idiotic men and women who struggle hard on this road cannot see the fact that whether the other party likes you and whether you are good or not are sometimes two completely different things, and there is no currency to convert.He likes you, you are good in everything, he doesn't like you, no matter how good you are, he can't see it.Lin Rui put all his eggs in one basket in the dream he wove, and moved forward bravely.

That night, Haiming asked Lin Rui to go to Thai food. Lin Rui went to the appointment happily and wore a new polo shirt. During the day, Qin Yue looked at him and sighed in pain, "Youth~" Lin Rui took it as Praise happily accepted it, and secretly hoped that Haiming would discover his change.He didn't realize the little girl's attitude in his subconscious, and he didn't reflect that the center of gravity of his whole life had become "Haiming thinks..." Heming lives up to expectations. . .not found.Lin Rui was secretly disappointed for a second, then happily chatted with Haiming and waited for the dishes to be served.Haiming was obviously in a very good mood, "Lin Rui, I have good news for you. You are the first to know!" Seeing his radiant look, Lin Rui couldn't help but feel happy, and was struck by the phrase "the first I know" I felt relieved and asked sweetly, "What's the good news?" "I talked to my supervisor, his UCLA professor mentioned me, and the other party had seen my resume and previous projects, and was ready to accept my application and let me I used to study PhD."

Lin Rui's head buzzed, and he looked at him fixedly, "What, when did it happen, I, why didn't I know you were applying?" Haiming didn't notice his abnormality at all, "I talked to the MIT professor before There is cooperation, and I also have the intention to continue my studies, but there is no large-scale application. This time, the professor happened to be recruiting students, and my supervisor mentioned it to him. It is basically confirmed that I can be offered, but there are still some procedures. "

Lin Rui couldn't even hear what he said next, "He's leaving, he's leaving, he's going to disappear from my life. He didn't even tell me when he applied to go abroad." There was too much information, and he didn't even It is better to know which one to be sad about, the other party is leaving, and he has not completed 20 tasks, not to the extent that he feels that he can confess, or the other party did not put him in the group that needs to be notified of the plan before in.He suddenly felt that his heart was going to explode, he needed an outlet, he had to tell the other party, I am changing, you wait for me.

"Lin Rui, Lin Rui?" "Ah?" Lin Rui snapped back to his senses, seeing Hai Ming's bewildered expression, with a bit of grievance of "you are my brother, why aren't you happy for me".Lin Rui lowered his head and took a sip of Coke to cover up his unnatural expression. He laughed at himself, "Look, I understand your expression, but you will never understand mine." He looked up at Haiming and finally understood It's not that he can't understand, he just doesn't want to understand.He, Lin Rui, was not so important that Haiming had to spend time thinking about it, so naturally the other party couldn't understand his mood.He thought he had accepted this inequality a long time ago, but he was wronged in the end.He pulled the corner of his mouth vigorously to make a smile, "Great! I was stunned by the great news. Then you must treat me tonight!" Haiming laughed, "Okay! You Foodies!" When the dishes came, Lin Rui suddenly felt that today was really the right occasion, and his heart was like the Tom Yum Kung Soup and Green Curry Chicken on the table, sour and spicy, rushing from the throat to the nasal cavity.

Haiming seemed to be in a state of leaving, "In the future, you should remember to eat well, don't always eat apple bread and the like, you don't need to lose weight, just pay attention to it. Thai food is still suitable for you Yes, it’s not too exciting, and it’s warmer..." Lin Rui looked at Haiming’s rambling, and suddenly made the craziest decision in his life so far, and then said with a smile, “I was surprised before One reason is that I have been preparing to go abroad, but I haven’t passed the GMAT and TOEFL, so I haven’t told you yet. It’s a coincidence that you startled me when you said it.” Lin Rui felt that he was really a movie star, He played with all his strength, "Hey, do you want to take these exams too? Or do you save all these steps? Oh, I am so lucky to have a good tutor." Haiming was also surprised, "Really?! God Ah, you want to go abroad too, is there any school you particularly want to go to?" Lin Rui was thinking quickly, he knew that the trick to acting is coincidence, but it can't be all coincidence, "No, California is actually pretty good , but I'm also considering schools in the east. Besides, I have to finish the exam to see where I can apply." Haiming smiled and cheered him up, "You've decided? Anyway, as long as you decide, brother, I will I support you. Come on, cheers! I wish you all your wishes come true!" The two clinked glasses of Coke, looking energetic and happy.But when toasting, both of them hid their changed faces behind the cups.Lin Rui thought to himself, "If you really know what I'm thinking, you shouldn't wish me what I want." But Haiming's face was obscure, and he felt the deep irony of fate, Murphy's law, some The more you want to avoid things, the more you can't avoid them. The more you don't want to hurt your fate, the more you will be entangled together.

After eating, the two of them walked back to school slowly. Haiming chatted intentionally or unintentionally about the company where Lin Rui worked part-time, "Didn't you say last time that your senior brother and boss are very optimistic about you, and started to offer you a formal job again. Then when you left, did they know about it?" Lin Rui seemed to take revenge, "I haven't told them yet, you were the first to know about it." Sure enough, Haiming stopped talking.Lin Rui had a premonition in his heart that Haiming was actually much smarter than he thought.He may know everything, but he doesn't point it out, and tries his best to maintain a balance of not talking and not asking.The sad thing is that Lin Rui doesn't have enough chips to break this balance. Once he breaks the balance, Haiming can only stay away from him, so he can only pretend to be stupid.

That night, Lin Rui searched the Internet for GMAT and TOEFL test materials and information, and made a plan.It must have been too late for him to memorize the most basic words, so he just went all out, relying on his English is not bad, and directly took the mock questions.At 4 o'clock in the morning, Lin Rui washed his face and went to sleep silently, looking at the miserable mock test scores.Then at 6 o'clock, I got up again and started searching the Internet for strategies.In the next few weeks, he stopped swimming and listened to MP3s while running, and linkinPark was replaced by listening test questions and downloaded lecture recordings from New Oriental teachers.It was Qin Yue who first discovered that Lin Rui's state was not right. Lin Rui worked hard as always and completed the task earnestly, like a small cannonball full of energy, but he was full of vigor before, but now, the more he looked at it, the more he looked like he was holding his breath.He asked Lin Rui if anything happened. Lin Rui hesitated for a moment, but still told the truth, "I'm preparing to go abroad." Then he said apologetically, "I'm working full-time, thank you and brother. But I may have to I have let down your kindness." After speaking, he lowered his head, like a child who has done something wrong.If it weren't for knowing his character, Qin Yue would have suspected that he did it on purpose.Every time he did something wrong, it would look like "I'm sorry to the whole world, I want to commit suicide and apologize", and then Qin Yue couldn't say anything.Just like now, Qin Yue was silent for a long time, and he couldn't say anything angry, "Can I ask the reason?" Lin Rui subconsciously took it, "No, I just think it's more suitable for research, and I'm more familiar with the research environment over there. I like it..." Speaking of this, he suddenly felt that he was not only fake, but also despicable.He used rotten excuses to dismiss people who were really good to him, and took advantage of the other party's kindness, but refused to even speak the truth.He raised his head abruptly, "Qin Yue, do you have time to listen to a story?"

The sky is very cloudy, and the pattering rain hits the windows, making people who enjoy the dryness in the house feel the same dull air pressure.Qin Yue was sitting in the coffee shop, using a spoon to slowly stir a sip of the untouched but cold black coffee.Lin Rui sat across from him, holding a cup of latte in both hands. The cup was slowly cooling down, but he absorbed the warmth from the faint heat like a little match girl.Qin Yue ordered the latte for him. Qin Yue felt that he had a bad stomach and shouldn't drink coffee, so he always ordered latte for him.He thought, Qin Yue really took care of him as his younger brother.Qin Yue looked at the hair whirling on the top of Lin Rui's head, and suddenly smiled, "People who have hair whirling are stubborn." Then, under Lin Rui's confused eyes, he continued, "So, your changes during this period are all For him, for him to lose weight, change his image, break up, and now go abroad?" Lin Rui nodded.Qin Rui asked in a rare sharp tone, "Then if you go to the same city, or even the same school, he still doesn't like you? Or, if you can't apply for the same city, you go to another city , you are far apart, maybe because of the same or similar time zone, you can often talk on the phone, send text messages, and chat once a week. Then at other times, you are in that strange place, you don’t even know A city of love, a lonely life. You have to make friends again, and start a hard study that lasts for 5 years or more. You may think that you can bear it, but then? He returns to the country, or stays there. Then get married and have children. Your contact gradually decreases until there is no more. You try your best to climb up to a "remote accompanying student" status for a few years? When he tells his wife about this paragraph in the future, you are just a story The 'friend who also went abroad'. He doesn't even know what job you do every day, where you go to take root..."

"Stop talking!" Lin Rui grabbed Qin Yue's hand. There was still a little warmth from the latte in his palm, but his fingers were already cold.Qin Yue felt it, he was trembling.He no longer provoked Lin Rui, he still couldn't bear to make Lin Rui sad.Sighing, he held Lin Rui's hand with both hands, and slowly warmed him up, "You can do it after you decide. But remember, you are not alone, you have a brother." Lin Rui burst into tears Next, guilt will overwhelm him.Not only for Qin Yue, but also for himself.His poor self-esteem and pride couldn't stand him belittling himself so much.But what to do?He really can't let go.