Stories

And a mediocre life, instead of being two dazzling strangers in this world, separated by countless mountains and seas of people, each spending his own life.

Take me away, Qi Chu.

please.

However I did not answer.

I just leaned against the cold door, curled up on the ground like I have dreamed so many times in my dreams, and cried like a child.

I had a dream in which I was lying in an elevator in an underground parking lot, blood was pouring from under my head, and a child in a furry suit was sitting next to me, howling loudly, and I wanted to hug it Hold him, coax him not to cry.

But I can't move.

I awoke after dawn.

I'm not cold or hungry, but I just wake up naturally when the time comes.

The window of the study room was open, and I walked to the window, and saw a figure downstairs standing under the street lamp.

Expected.

I opened the study door, and Qi Chu was no longer there.The lights in the house were on, and there was a bowl of porridge on the kitchen counter.In this weather, there are actually flies, sitting on a knife in the kitchen knife holder.

I drank the porridge, took the knife, got dressed, and went downstairs.

It was quiet downstairs.

There are no pedestrians, no vehicles, in the most prosperous section of the entire S city, in the most expensive neighborhood, there is no one, not even a guard, only the street lamp and the person under the street lamp.

He is wearing a dark blue windbreaker, tall and tall, and already looks like a young man. He has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, like a fox, with a narrow face and a beautiful nose bridge. His eyes are a little happy and a little sad when he looks at me.

"Hi, Uncle." He called me that, and stretched out his hand, as if to touch my face.

I dodge.

"I'm not your uncle, I'm Xiao Lin."

His eyes dimmed for an instant, and he smiled self-deprecatingly.

"Okay, now you hate me."

"I do not hate you."

He raised his eyes and looked at me quietly.

"What do you want? Uncle?" His eyes are so sincere, like a beggar who has nothing, but also like the most devout believer: "Whatever you want, as long as you ask, I will give it."

"I want the truth."

The truth behind all the chaos, all the puzzles, all the illogicality and contradictions.

His eyes curled up.

He laughed, but his voice sounded like a sigh.

"Okay, then I'll give you the truth."

I followed him and walked around the city for a long time.

The whole city is empty, no pedestrians, no vehicles, all people seem to disappear overnight, like the end of the world scene, we walk on the wide driveway, passing many places, we pass the billboards in the city center , the promotion of the second part of Qi Chu’s Legend of Yunlu is playing on the screen. I am familiar with the lyrics of the theme song: After all, I miss this moment, and I once got drunk and asked the fisherman... I saw you laughing while watching the peach blossoms, but it turned out that I never Never let go.It was the word I filled in for Qi Chu in high school.

We passed by the university where I was teaching and walked in. It was still the same as I remembered, but there was no seat for me in the office, only Cheng Yin's wedding photo was on the table, and the teacup was still steaming.On the school's bulletin board, the news of the anniversary of Principal Cheng's death was posted.

We passed by my house, many things were old, my mother was not at home, neither was Xiao Hang, and there was a photo of my father hanging on the wall.

We passed the cemetery. On my father’s tombstone, the date of birth and death was 1954-2002. I was 19 years old that year, the same age as Xiao Hang this year.

We kept walking, kept walking, the city was snowing heavily, and the snow was getting deeper and deeper, and I finally stopped.

?

"What are you trying to say?" I asked him standing in the snow, "Am I crazy? Or am I dreaming?"

He didn't answer me.

He just raised his head and looked at the building in front of him.

"The library is here, let's go in."

There is no one in the library, all the books are quietly on the bookshelves, and the tall bookshelves are layer after layer, like tombstones standing quietly.

"Find a book," he told me. "Find a book you've read."

I picked up a volume of Tang history, and the handwriting on the book was normal.

"Now, find a book you haven't read." He told me: "A book you haven't read before, and you will never read again."

I went around several rows of bookshelves and found a thick volume of criminal law.

He put his hand on the page of the book.

Against the light, his pupils were black, as if he wanted to see through my soul.

"Do you often feel that a certain scene has happened before? The new things you just know will soon be repeated in your life, and you will become a completely different person in your dreams. Everything feels very real. Waking up and quickly forgetting..."

"what do you want to say?"

He smiled sadly.

"Remember that question? Where is the capital of Madagascar?" He withdrew his hand: "Open the book, and you will know."

I open the book.

Beneath the gilded case, the pages of the book are blank.I scroll down, every page is blank except for the page number, I drop the book, open the next one on the shelf, and the next one.

It's all blank.

Those books that I have not read, and will not read, are not my major, and I have no interest in them. None of them have content. I turned to a book of Western history in a hurry. I read the first few pages a few years ago. , and then turned back, it was all blank.

I ran to the administrator’s workbench in a panic, turned on the computer, and searched for books on the Internet. As long as I hadn’t read them, I couldn’t open them all. I couldn’t log in to my account on the school intranet. I opened the world map, and all the books I didn’t have The countries that have been to and have not seen the information are all blurred.

I open the web and search for Madagascar.

Just after typing these five words, there was a bang, and the lights in the entire library were dimmed.

I slumped in my chair.

I don't know why I can still laugh.

I sat in the chair and laughed, and the more I laughed, the more crazy I was, and I finally burst into tears.

"What is this? A prank?" I grabbed his collar: "Who are you? What are you going to tell me? Am I a lunatic? Am I still Xiao Lin? Where is this place? Who am I?" ?”

He looked at me with sad and gentle eyes.

"No, you're not crazy."

"You are Xiao Lin. You are 35 years old. You used to be a very good manager. You made Qi Chu popular with one hand and ruined him with the other. You have produced two kings in your hands, and you quit the entertainment industry at the age of 30. Your father It was a teacher who died when you were 19, and your best friend was called Ling Lanqiu, who died when you were 31."

"You failed to become a professor. You entered the entertainment industry after graduating from university. You fell out with your teacher because of this. After his death, you would drink a lot of alcohol every year on his death day. You failed to save Cheng Ke. You and Zhao Li There are very few contacts. Your mother died when you were 31 years old, and Xiao Hang became a doctor later."

"You failed to save Qi Chu's father, you failed to get to know him before his parents divorced, you broke up with him because of Zhao Li, and you became someone else's manager. That person loves you very much, loves you very much, you will Spend the rest of your life with that guy who made a mistake when you were 35 and you got shot by his fans in an underground parking lot...”

I looked at him, he squatted halfway in front of me, he looked at me with such sad eyes, as if he was about to shed tears.

"That person is you, right?"

"Yeah, that person is me." He put his face on my knee, obviously he is such a beautiful person, but he always looks like a homeless child.

Warm liquid slid from his eyes and wet my pants.

"I'm Tu Yao..." He told me, "Why don't you remember me?"

There was a bang in my head, and everything suddenly became clear.

That sudden brake, the domineering boy in boots, the appearance of him holding a cross in his mouth, the heavy rain, the car accident, Tu Yao sitting in chaos.The reeds in the suburbs, the unrevealable mask, Guan Yongping's villa, the island in the Pacific Ocean, and his smile...

He always laughs, always makes trouble with me, he always calls me uncle, follows me, pesters me, I once promised him that I will spend the rest of my life with him.

How could I forget it!

The ground shook, and all the bookshelves were collapsing. We seemed to be sucked into the center of the vortex of the tornado. All the pages of the book were torn apart, and countless fragments flew like snowflakes, covering the sky and the sun with snow.

We seem to be buried under snowflakes.

The walls of the library melted, and everything gradually became blurred. The whole city collapsed in front of me, leaving only the sky full of snow. We are in the white snowy field, and a figure is walking towards us .

Tu Yao curled up, moaning in pain, his body was gushing blood, this scene was very similar to Zhao Li that day.

My tears welled up uncontrollably.

"Don't!" I wanted to cover his wound, but his whole body seemed to be cut by an invisible sharp knife. My hands were covered with warm blood. I pressed his chest in vain, but found that I couldn't even perform the simplest CPR. will not do.

I am not the doctor's son, I am not Xiao Lin who can save Qi Chu's father, I am his Xiao Lin.

"Why? Stop!" I knelt in the snow and yelled at the person walking towards us: "Stop! Stop, I will never forgive you, I will never forgive you in my life!"

He stood in the wind and snow, snowflakes fell on his shoulders, his hands were stained with blood, but his expression was extremely sad.

"Why?" He grabbed my wrist in doubt, and looked at me with puzzled eyes: "I am Qi Chu, don't you remember? You love me, you have loved me since you were 15 years old, we We have been together for many years, very happy, everything is fine..."

"that