Blind Faith

When I told Isaac I wanted to dance with him, I wasn't kidding, so I didn't waste a minute when I arrived at his house after work on Tuesday.

It's something I've always wanted to do.

So when I walked through the front door, I pulled him over for a quick kiss. "Is Hannah still here?"

"No," Isaac replied cautiously. "She left almost half an hour ago."

"Fine," I said, drawing him into the living room, "I've been wanting to do this for three days."

"What?" Isaac asked me.I could tell he was a little nervous, but he kept smiling.

"Dance."

"what?"

I laughed. "Do you have any speakers for your iPhone?"

He turned his face to the far wall cabinet, and I saw the stereo. "Well, what's the matter?"

I laughed. "I think we need some music."

He scratched his head. "Well……"

"You wait here." I told him.Then I walked over, pulled out my iPhone, flicked through my playlist, and plugged it into the speaker.I hit play, turned up the volume, and went back to him.

"It's really not my type of music," he told me.

I grabbed his waist and pulled him closer to me. "Music isn't the point." I take his crotch and press it against mine, and we start to rock slowly. "Can you feel the rhythm?"

He nodded.

"Feel your heartbeat in your chest: thump, thump, thump?"

He nodded again, his arms around my back, and I could feel him giving in.He started to follow my steps.

I run my hands over his hips, up his waist, all over his body. "Can you feel it?"

He said softly: "Yes."

For someone who has never danced before, Isaac dances well.He swayed against my body, his crotch pressed against mine.I could feel his growth, his hardness, how he wanted me so much.So I grab his ass and pull him towards me, rubbing each other's cocks through the clothes.

I licked and kissed the skin on his neck back and forth. "I've been wanting to do this since Saturday," I said, kissing him from the neck to the chin.His hands found my face, and he pressed my lips to his, kissing me fiercely.

He pushed me onto the couch behind me, but I stopped him. "To the bedroom?"

We've made out in his room before, the first time I put him in my mouth and then he tasted me, only this time we had each other at the same time.We fell on his bed, kissed, hugged, licked, stroked, and when we were finally honest, I showed him what I wanted to do.

He was lying on the bed with his head against the pillow, his long cock already hard and ready to go.So I went all the way down his body and kissed his chest, his belly, and then licked his body from bottom to top.He moaned, but when I lay down next to him with my crotch against his face and sides facing each other he knew what I wanted him to do.

He explored every inch of my body, running his fingers and lips over me.His blowjob skills are still raw, but god, he's learning.

I wrap my arms around his hips and swallow his cock as deep as I can.Isaac's whole body was arched stiffly, his cock throbbing in my mouth, and with a choked sound, he came in my throat.

His whole body was shaking as the orgasm subsided, and when I tried to pull him away, his arms wrapped around me even tighter.He nuzzled my pubic hair and took a deep breath.

"Now it is your turn."

He started to move without haste, licking, sucking, learning.His fingers ran all over my body, tugging at my balls and circling around my back hole.And when I reminded him that I was going to cum, he didn't back away.He sucked on the head harder as he jerked my cock and I cum in his mouth.

He grunted, then gagged.

Even though my head was still spinning and my heart was melting, I could tell he was shaking as he swallowed.He sat up, then frowned. "This stuff doesn't taste very good," he said.

I laughed out loud and I pulled him to lie down like me.I pulled him towards me and covered him with the comforter beside me. "Oh, honey, I was going to remind you."

"I want to taste that," he said softly.

I lifted his chin and kissed him, running my tongue across his mouth. "Does my mouth taste better?"

"Well," he hummed, "it's much better."

I rolled over so I was completely on top of him and we were both naked. "You just need to practice more."

His fingers caressed one side of my cheek. "You don't mind cooperating with me?"

I laughed out loud, "I'm so excited."

And over the next three or four weeks, we did just that.Well, whether it was me having a good time or him having a good time, we didn't really care about it.

We try to find as much time together as possible, and usually we end up rolling in his bed.Or on the couch.Or in the shower.I tell him about the tattoo on my left hip, and even though he can't see it, he touches it, kisses it, licks it, every time.We haven't had a real relationship yet, but we do everything else.Not all physical though.

We would talk about a lot, though he still didn't open up to me about the car accident that left him blind or his parents.He didn't have to tell me.I'm just thinking that maybe one day he'll be willing to talk.

I wondered what I had to do, what I could do to get him to confess to me.

***

It was a Sunday, almost two months after Isaac and I had been together, and my phone rang.It's a work call.I frowned at the phone, but answered it anyway. "I'm Carter Reese."

"Carter, this is Kate from the animal hospital. I'm sorry to bother you on Sunday."

"Kate, it's okay," I told her, "is something wrong?"

"I just received a call from Mrs. Yao," she said softly, "Her cat, Mr. Beard, passed away."

Oh damn.

"She's very sad right now."

"I'm going to visit her," I told her, "I'm leaving now."

I hung up and Isaac was by my side. "Carter, what's the matter?"

"Mrs. Yao, that petite old lady who was on my family visit list," I said softly, "I would visit her every Thursday before seeing you. Then, her old Mr. Cat Beard died Yes. She's very sad now."

Isaac squeezed my hand. "You should go."

"Yes, I should go." Then I stopped and looked at him. "Can I keep Missy here? Is that okay?"

"Of course," he said quickly.But when I got to the door, Isaac stopped me, "Carter?"

I stop. "What's wrong?"

"I can go with you."

"Hey," I hesitated, "Are you sure?"

He stood up. "If you think it's okay. She might need someone to sit with her... while you tend to Mr. Beard."

"Okay." I agreed.

He grabbed the keys to his house and walked over to me.Obviously he didn't want to take Brady with him.

"What about Brady?"

"He can stay here with Missy. They can go through the dog hole in the door to the backyard, and they'll be all right."

I smile. "I know they'll be all right. But what do you do?"

He stopped, and I saw a slight tremor in his shoulders. "You'll be with me, won't you?"

"Of course," I said quickly, "of course I'll be with you."

"Then I'll be fine."

I parked the Jeep in front of Mrs. Yao's little house, and immediately went around to Isaac's side after getting out of the car.He put his hand on my arm and we went up two steps and knocked on the front door.When Mrs. Yao opened the door, the thin woman's eyes filled with tears.

"Mrs. Yao, I rushed over as soon as I received the news."

"Come in," she said, and as soon as we entered her living room, she asked, "Who is this?"

"Mrs. Yao, this is Isaac Branigan. He is...my boyfriend. I was with him when Kate called me."

"Oh," she said softly.She looked at Isaac's hand on my forearm, then at his sunglasses. "Is he blind?"

"Yes, I'm blind," Isaac told her.

"Oh," she said, nodding. "My doctor said I also only have half the vision in my left eye."

"That's not a good thing, Mrs. Yao." Isaac said softly.

"Sit down, please," she said, gesturing toward the old orange-and-brown floral sofa. "Shall I get you something to drink?"

I walked Isaac to the couch and sat down with him. "You don't need to bother, Mrs. Yao, we can do it like this," I told her without waiting for her to make a fuss.But I had to ask her that nasty question. "Tell me, Mrs. Yao, what happened to Mr. Beard?"

She sighed sadly. "It hasn't been able to eat for two days, and I'm worried," she said in broken English. "I couldn't find it this morning. It never went far. It was too old. But it didn't sleep in its chair." She said, looking at the old brown rocking chair in front of the window.

Then she looked at me, her lower lip trembling. "I found it in the back garden."

It is typical behavior for cats to leave the house before death.I nodded and asked her softly, "So where is it now?"

"I put it in a box," she said, wiping her eyes with a crumpled handkerchief. "At the garden table."

I nodded, and Isaac moved his hand from my forearm to my palm.I shook his hand tenderly. "Mrs. Yao, can I ask how you want to deal with Mr. Beard's funeral?"

She wiped her eyes with her handkerchief. "I want to bury it, just in this garden."

"Madam Yao, would you like me to help bury it?" I asked. "I'll dig the hole, and then we can stay here too while you say goodbye to it."

She nodded, then burst into tears. "Are you really willing to help so kindly?"

Isaac replied, his voice a little stiff: "Of course we will help."

Mrs. Yao told me that there is a shovel by the back door, which can be seen through the kitchen.

I told Isaac that I would be back soon, and when I walked out of the room, I heard Mrs. Yao ask him in a way that only an old lady in her nineties is qualified to ask such a question: "How did you become blind?" ?”

This is something I have been wanting to talk to him for two months, but I have never had the courage to ask, and the thin Mrs. Yao, who has only known him for a few minutes, asked so directly.

"It was a car accident," Isaac told her. "I was eight years old."

As much as I really wanted to listen in, I knew I shouldn't, and I knew that as soon as Isaac heard the back door close, he'd know I heard them.

So I concentrated on digging in the garden, trying not to think about the things he would tell a total stranger but wouldn't tell me.It was a warm autumn afternoon, and digging wasn't easy.I can see that this garden used to be very beautiful, but it would be too big for Mrs. Yao to take care of it by herself.The flowering season is over this year, and the leaves are constantly falling from the branches, making the unmowed lawn a mess.

When I finished, I walked back into the room and heard Mrs. Yao talking about an old neighbor friend who also had a guide dog, and I wondered if the conversation involved Brady, or even Lo Ruth, the guide dog that Isaac had had before Brady, died that broke his heart.

I also want to talk to him about this topic.I want him to open up to me, not to anyone else.Then I realized he was comforting a grieving old lady, and I was stabbed with guilt and shame.

Isaac turned to me, apparently hearing me approaching.I smiled at him and looked over him at the little lady. "Mrs. Yao? You can go there when you are ready."

I walked over to Isaac and put his hand on mine.I led Isaac to the backyard behind Mrs. Yao.Madam Yao held Isaac's arm as I lowered the box into the hastily dug grave and refilled the hole with soil.

Mrs. Yao said something softly, while Isaac and I stood not far away.When she was done, she wiped away her tears, then hugged and thanked us both.She offered to make us some tea, but I explained to her that we had to go.She said she was going to make herself some tea anyway and go to bed early, and she thanked us again.

"I like Dr. Fields," she said bluntly, "but I like you too." She put Isaac's hand on my forearm. "I don't care if boys are with boys. If you're lucky enough to find someone you love, hold on to them."

Instead, I changed the subject and told her that I would be at her house on Thursday for a family visit as originally planned, and she could make me a cup of green tea then.It would be a good excuse to visit and see this small, frail, lonely and sad lady.

Isaac was quiet on the way back to his house.I put my hand on his knee to comfort him, but I didn't want to push him, so I didn't say anything.It wasn't until we got back to his house and he was sitting on his couch that he finally spoke.

"Mrs. Yao told me she had Mr. Beard for 17 years," he said softly, "and she got it when her husband died." I sat next to him, looking at him and holding his hand. "She told me that losing Mr Beard was like losing her husband all over again."

Then he took a deep breath and squeezed my hand. "I know exactly how that feels, Carter. I know exactly how painful it is."

I knew he was about to confide in me so I let him lean against me and held him in my arms while he was talking.

"I don't remember the accident anymore. I was only eight years old. Of course I started to remember before that, I remember what certain things were like. I remember what my mother was like..." His The voice gradually lowered, and I tightened my arms around him.

"But I don't remember the accident. I woke up three days later in the hospital. I knew I was awake, but my face and my eyes were bandaged so it looked dark. That It hurt. I remember that. They told me I had been in a car accident and my mum didn't make it through."

"Oh baby."

He sighed. "Then they took off my bandages and I opened my eyes and it was still pitch black. At first I was in a daze, like I couldn't open my eyes, even though I knew they were open." He shook his head.

He was silent for a long time. "Want to know something ridiculous?" he asked himself and answered. "I used to be terrified of the dark. When I was little, until the accident, I had to sleep with the lights on."

"Oh, Isaac, baby." That's all I could say.All this time I wanted him to tell me, but now I don't know what to say.I kissed the side of his head.

“I had my first guide dog when I was nine years old. His name was Cody. It was a photo of me and him when I was a kid,” he said, waving to the fireplace where the picture frame sits. "It has helped me a lot. I don't know if I would have been as resilient and independent as I am without it."

"He stayed with me until I was 14, and after that, I had Rose. Rose was... Rose was special. She was my best friend. We were inseparable, whether it was going to school or hiking. Over there on the fireplace there are pictures of me and it on the trail in Warmpatuck State Park," he said softly, "but it's not all that. It was a tough time for me...  ’ He cleared his throat. "My dad couldn't get over the loss of his wife, he couldn't accept the fact that his son was blind, he was always drinking. He wasn't doing well..." Isaac was lying sideways in my arms, sort of curled up my side.

"It was a difficult time. I was trying to finish school and adjust to being gay. I had Hannah, but she was too busy taking care of Dad," he continued softly, "and I still There's Rose. It's my lifesaver."

He fell silent so I kissed the top of his head again. "what happened?"

"He's getting deaf," he said softly. "He's so old, it's happening so fast. Or so it seems to me. At the very end, he died of diabetes."

I remember Dr. Fields telling me that Isaac spent two years caring for his sick dog.He has been taking care of it even though it has long been unable to fulfill its duties.

"You must love it."

He nodded against my chest, and said softly, "When it died, it was like I lost my sight again."

My eye sockets are moist.I wanted to tell I was sorry, but all I could do was wrap him in my arms and kiss his forehead.

Mark probably thought I had fallen in love with Isaac four weeks earlier, and in fact that may have been the case.But at this moment, I know, I am sure, I believe without reservation: at this very moment, I am truly in love with Isaac Branigan.