Baima Weiyang

When I got up, I found that the person was still lying back in Gadan Nang Sai.It’s not that Tsangyang Gyatso broke his promise, it’s just that he has to get up early every day to go to the Tsochen Hall for morning classes, so he can’t just let me sleep in the Buddhist hall.

Shaking his head, he found that his head hurt a little, rubbed his temples, and felt much better.It must have been frozen yesterday.He raised his eyes and glanced out the window, the sky was already bright.Unexpectedly, after so many days of heavy rain, it turned out to be sunny now.

I pushed away the pulu blanket and ran to the window excitedly.The long-lost sunlight shone on his face in white, with a hint of warm fragrance.Pushing open the window, a breeze blows in, carrying the fragrance of rocks and Gesang Meiduo.However, I haven't heard it for a few days, but there is an illusion like a world away.

Is this natural disaster really going to pass?

I secretly asked questions in my heart, but I still couldn't get an answer.Will this unethical love be like the city of Lhasa, where the weather clears up after the rain?Thinking about it, he couldn't help but twitched the corner of his mouth.I can't say whether it's joy or sorrow, but this relatively peaceful moment still makes me happy.

It’s just that I didn’t know at that time that the real “natural disaster” for Tsangyang Gyatso and I was after the rainstorm.

The days in Ganden Phodrangli were extremely peaceful, as long as I stayed with Tsangyang Gyatso, I would never be bored.But, for some unknown reason, he forbade me to go out, even strictly prohibited.In fact, I don't like to go out alone without him.It's just that the access control seems a little strange this time.

I figured something must have happened.But Tsangyang Gyatso didn't want me to know. Without a source of information, I couldn't do anything, so I simply gave up my wild thinking.Danba is a loose mouth, but I seldom see him these two days.I don't know if it was sent by Cangyang Gyatso to handle errands, or if it was intentional.

I was puzzled and even worried, but I never thought of asking Tsangyang Gyatso.These days, he's had enough.During the rainstorm, Buddha knelt down every night, but when the weather cleared up, he didn't seem to be as relieved as he imagined.Waking up in the middle of the night, Gadan Nang Sai's bed was always empty.I naturally understood that he went to the Buddha Hall again.

Sometimes I can't bear it anymore, and I will go to him like last time with a person and a blanket.Although they gave me verbal warnings and threats of force every time, of course, it was just pity for my forehead that was about to be swollen.But as long as I lean forward with a thick skin, the master will still open his implicit embrace.

Thinking of this, I couldn't help but "puchi" smile.

The scriptures on the top of the head suddenly moved away, and the dark eyes looked at me coldly.I immediately stopped laughing, and quietly shrank into Cangyang Gyatso's arms.Suddenly noticed the book in his hand, strange, this paper does not seem to be Ajiajiao, but it looks a bit like Dabo.The back of my head was pressed against Tsangyang Gyatso's chest, and I stared at the crooked Tibetan words on the page with a confused face.Although I don't understand it very well, it doesn't seem to be a scripture.

"What book is this?" I glanced back at him.

Probably because my big head blocked his sight, Tsangyang Gyatso adjusted his arms, clamped my body tightly, and firmly pressed the top of my head with his lower jaw.I was forced to be a little shorter.Just as he was about to resist, he heard him say, "The Four Medical Codes."

"Medical books?" I was taken aback, "What are you reading this for?"

Cangyang Gyatso turned a page and said calmly, "I don't just read scriptures."

"Oh." I answered absent-mindedly, and I twisted my neck. Just as I was about to reach out to remove the weight on my head, I heard a soft reprimand, "Either lie on your stomach, or get down."

I was startled, turned around, raised my eyes to scan Cangyang Gyatso's face.Those stern black eyes were staring at me indifferently.Secretly swallowing dry saliva, I hung my head in frustration. "Ah!" With a long sigh, I bent down unwillingly, and wrapped my hands around Tsangyang Gyatso's waist.

Sitting face to face on his lap, cheek against his chest, my legs spread out on either side of his body.In order not to block his sight, I could only lower my head.Very tired, but there is no way, I don't want to go down!

There was no sound in the room, and the occasional sound of pages being turned came from behind his head.

My buttocks moved towards Cangyang Gyatso's knees, and I tried to find a more comfortable position, this time it was truly "lying on my stomach".But after only a few moves, a warm snort suddenly sprayed on the back of the neck, "Don't move around."

I trembled all over, and my spine suddenly felt uncomfortable.Subconsciously trying to avoid it, Cangyang Gyatso suddenly stretched out his hand and pinched my cheek.I almost screamed in pain, I stretched out my head and stared at him for a while.In vain, he crouched down again.

Lying quietly, but thinking about medical books.Although I knew that he knew medicine a long time ago, I have never seen him read medical books.I know that Tsangyang Gyatso has read many books, but why study at this time?What happened outside? If you want to hide it from me like this, is it worse than the rainstorm?

I was stunned, and the hands around Cangyang Gyatso's waist couldn't help but exert more force.Looking up, his eyes stopped on the smooth jaw.The elegant lines and clear outline are more eye-catching than sunlight.As long as he still loves me, no matter what, I'm reluctant to leave him... Thinking of this, my heart gradually became more at ease.

"Master." A strange voice came into my ears suddenly.

I was taken aback, and turned to look outside the door of Gadan Nang Sai.The auspicious knotted satin curtain, which was half the height of a person, covered the man's face, but the crimson cassock exposed was quite eye-catching.

"Come in." Cangyang Gyatso didn't look up.

The door curtain was raised, and after a rough look at it, it seemed strange.No wonder, among the monks, I can only recognize Danba's appearance. As for the others, no matter how you look at them.Feeling that person walking towards us, I turned my head quickly.Knowing that we are in a very intimate position at this moment, but I really don't want to go down, so I simply buried my face in Tsangyang Gyatso's arms.

"Master, a letter from the Potala Palace."

"Hmm..." Cangyang Gyatso tilted his head, his tone was as calm as water, "Let's put it aside." After a pause, he said, "Go down."

"Yes, Duo Ren is leaving."

There was a slight sound of footsteps, and I didn't raise my buried face until I couldn't hear it at all.Turning his head to look at the yellow seal on the desk, he felt a little heavy in his heart.Letters from the Potala Palace are frequent these days.But after recalling this period of history in detail, it seems that nothing major should happen now.

Maybe I was overthinking, or Tsangyang Gyatso and Diba had already had close contacts.I don't bother to explore these.

However, whenever the Potala Palace is mentioned, I will inevitably think of Ngawang Rinchen.I have been thinking about his condition in my heart, but I dare not ask.One time, he accidentally said something, but fortunately, Cangyang Gyatso didn't pay much attention.But when I heard the news that Ngawang Rinchen was grounded by Diba, my heart was still shocked.

Thinking over and over why.Cangyang Gyatso only said one sentence.

It's because he doesn't want to come out.

What was my expression at that time, I don't know.But Cangyang Gyatso's eyes in front of him did darken.Afraid of making him angry again, I quickly turned my eyes away.Although he didn't say anything more, my heart was still uneasy.In fact, I'm not stupid, but sometimes I don't want to live so clearly.

The reason why Tsangyang Gyatso cares so much about Ngawang Rinchen is not because he is afraid that I will fall in love with him.In fact, he wouldn't think that way, and I wouldn't do that either.Even Tashi Pingcuo and Cangyang Gyatso didn't care much about it.The only thing he minds is the abandonment I can do for the path I chose.

I admit that emotionally, he can easily control my heart.But there is one thing that he can never predict.That's me from modern times.I know the consequences of this unethical love well, even more than Tsangyang Gyatso.From the beginning until now, I have never regretted it.Although I will be tortured by my own conscience from time to time, none of these can be a reason for me to give up my choice.

On this road of no return, I can abandon a lot.But I always have my bottom line. Once I exceed the bottom line... I don't know what I will do now, maybe I will stick to it, or I will turn back decisively.

I just ask...my appearance will not disrupt the pace of history, nor destroy him outside of history.

That's my bottom line.

Thinking of this, the eye sockets couldn't help but swell.The tears slid down my cheeks were scalding hot, I wiped them with my hands, and although I tried my best to restrain myself, I couldn't help sobbing.Feeling that the medical books on the back of my head were moved away, I panicked and quickly rubbed against Cangyang Gyatso's chest.But before the tears were wiped away, his chin was pinched.

Forced to bump into that cold gaze, I narrowed my eyes lazily on purpose.I vaguely felt that the handsome eyebrows in front of me frowned slightly, and I quickly covered my mouth and yawned, "Aha, I'm so sleepy."

I struggled to break free from his chin, but I saw Cangyang Gyatso staring at me intently.I simply stretched out my hand and hooked the back of his neck, just about to get closer to his face.But he suddenly looked away, touched my cheek with his warm palm, and casually wiped away the remaining tears from the corners of my eyes, "What are you thinking?"

I froze and stared blankly at him.After covering it up for a long time, he still showed his affection.I can't help touching my face, I can't be so transparent.Gritting my teeth secretly, I stared angrily at Cangyang Gyatso.

In the past, the handsome face that made me obsessed in every possible way, but now it looks so flattering.This man is obviously the reincarnation of a thousand-year-old ginseng essence. Maybe he was my drink and dish in his previous life, so in this life, let's turn it upside down...

Wanting to cry but not crying, after thinking about it, I decided to put on a weak expression, "I'm thinking of my father and mother." Cangyang Gyatso was slightly startled, put the medical book aside, and helped me up a bit, "Want to go back to Joan Jie?"

Without any hesitation, I simply shook my head.

"What does that mean?" Cangyang Gyatso frowned.

I rubbed my nose and replied earnestly, "It's one thing to think, but another thing to go or not." I deliberately turned my eyes away to not pay attention to his piercing eyes, but my face was still flushed red. I got up, sighed, and finally confessed honestly, "Well, I admit, I still prefer to stay by your side."

The forehead was poked hard again.Just as I was about to raise my hand to rub it, a soft kiss covered my lips.After tossing and turning for a long time, the fragrance that does not belong to me slowly receded from my mouth.In the end, Tsangyang Gyatso reached out and patted my slightly warm cheek, "I still have some business to deal with."

I grabbed his cassock with my backhand, and I stared at him dissatisfied, "Then what should I do?" Cangyang Gyatso glanced at me, "Are you not sleepy now?" a yawn.Blinking his misty eyes, he found that his eyelids were really heavy.

Feeling that Tsangyang Gyatso might push me to the ground at any moment, I hurriedly stuck to his body firmly.Helplessly, the master had already seen through my plot at a glance, frowned and stared at me for a long time, and then hugged me in a compromise.I grinned at the corners of my mouth, then respectfully bowed to him with my palms together, "Thank you, master."

As a result, the master threw me on the bed within a few steps.

"Ah—" I screamed and rolled around, and after I stopped, my hateful eyes shot at the culprit half a foot away like bullets.But the handsome figure just twitched the corners of his mouth, "You are too polite, this is what a master should do."

I was immediately annoyed, why didn't I realize that this monk has such a serious tendency to violence! !I didn't bother to fight any more, so I simply rolled into the pulu blanket.Breathing the sweltering air, I listened intently to the movements of Gadan Nang Saili.Until there was a sound of footsteps, I quickly tore off the blanket covering my head, "Hey, wait a minute!"

Cangyang Gyatso paused, looked sideways at me, "What?"

I retracted my head into the blanket again, only my eyes and forehead were exposed, "Master, remember to come back early." The voice was very soft, but enough for him to hear.Cangyang Gyatso pondered for a while, then nodded reluctantly, "Yes."

Keeping a close eye on his slender back, I sent him out of the curtain with blank eyes.

Waiting quietly until there was no more sound in the Gadan Nang Saili, I stared blankly at the caisson with complicated patterns directly above.Turning his head to look at the book case, the "Four Medical Codes" had disappeared.Although I don't know what it is, I feel that something big is happening outside.Thinking about it, my body has completely lost sleepiness.

I simply pushed away the blanket, got out of bed and ran to the door curtain.But as soon as I opened it, I saw two overlapping arms lying in front of me.Looking around along the arm, there are two acolytes.One of them is Duo Ren who just came in to deliver the letter, and the other is an acolyte I have never seen before.

"Why didn't you let me go out?" I glanced at Duo Ren coldly.

Seeing my unkind expression, he couldn't help but bowed guiltily, "Master has ordered you not to move around at will."

"Yeah." I turned my eyes away angrily, opened my body and looked out of the corridor.The two acolytes did not dare to have physical contact with me, so the two arms that were lying in front of their eyes were quickly lowered.

Duo Ren looked at me with his palms folded, his expression a bit embarrassed, "You..."

After waving my hands, I said annoyedly, "Don't worry, I don't plan to go out." Although I don't like being looked at like this, it is true.Of course, it's not that I really don't want to go out, but no matter how confused I am, I can still feel it from their movements and breaths: these two acolytes know martial arts.

My thoughts turned, and I said seriously, "Where is the Danba man? You asked him to come to see me." After a pause, I quickly added, "Right now!"

"This..." Duo Ren was stunned for a moment, feeling a little embarrassed.After exchanging glances with another acolyte, he made a Namaste respectfully, "Yes, Duo Ren will help you find it."

Seeing that he finally agreed, I finally felt a little better.After calming down, Fang felt that it was unethical to burn someone with an unknown fire just now, so he couldn't help changing his attitude, "Well, thank you very much!"

Hearing this, Duo Ren looked a bit dazed, reacted and quickly bowed, "Don't dare. Duo Ren will leave." Then he turned and walked to the aisle.

I glanced at another acolyte who was still respectfully standing aside, turned around and lifted the auspicious knotted satin curtain.Striding into Gadan Nang Sai, I was still a little depressed.I can't figure out what kind of medicine is sold in Cangyang Gyatso's gourd. It is false to say that there is no anger at all, but it is not true to say that he is really angry.I'm more worried.

Alas, I sighed, it's useless to think too much, for now, let's meet Danba first.I don't know if Duo Ren can find me, or if Tsangyang Gyatso will not allow him to come to see me.

I made up my mind not to think too much, I simply jumped back on the bed.He leaned against the head of the bed with his clothes on, and pulled up the pulu blanket, but his limbs were still cold after covering him for a long time.I closed my eyelids, although I didn't feel sleepy, I thought it was all about closing my eyes and resting my mind.

About a quarter of an hour later, a small sound came from outside the door curtain.My thoughts were disturbed, and I suddenly opened my eyes.Looking in the direction of the door curtain, under the satin curtain, a pair of monk boots were exposed straight out.

I pushed the blanket away and ran over in two or three steps. When the curtain was lifted, I saw Danba standing firmly outside the door.Probably because I acted in a hurry, he was a little dazed, and stared at me for a long time before he realized, and hurriedly performed Namaste respectfully.

I waved my hand to signal him to stand up, and I said flatly, "Danba, I have something to ask you."

The person on the opposite side was stunned, his dark brown eyes were a little surprised, but there was also a trace of hesitation.I turned my head and scanned around, but I didn't see Duo Ren's figure.Only the acolyte who had been here just now was looking at Danba with some worry.

I was taken aback for a moment, could it be that... Cangyang Gyatso didn't agree to him coming to see me?In other words, Danba came to find me privately?

While his thoughts were wandering, Danba suddenly took a small step forward, and said in a respectful tone, "Someone came to Ganden Pozhang to look for you."

I couldn't help but be more puzzled, "Who is it?"

"He said he was your family member, named Tashi Punco."

"Tashi Pingcuo?!" Startled, I hurriedly asked, "Where is he now?"

"On the veranda of the Square."

"En. I see. I'll go there now." He started to walk away, but he caught a glimpse of Danba's expression from the corner of his eye.After thinking for a while, I turned around and stared at him sharply, "Danba, what do you want to say to me?"

As soon as the words fell, Danba's face turned pale.He is not a person who can hide. The reason why he showed this expression is entirely because I told him what was on his mind.Although my heart is bright, I understand what he wants to say is exactly where my heart lies these days.But after knowing that he made a decision one step earlier than me, his heart felt like a layer of chili powder was sprinkled on his heart.

I looked at Danba blankly, and I said calmly, "Come with me." Danba didn't move, but the acolyte standing beside him looked anxious.Just as I was about to speak, I saw that Danba had already stretched out his arms to stop him, "You don't need to intervene, this is the master's intention."

The acolyte glanced at us separately, then clasped his hands together and made a salute.He lowered his head quickly, so he didn't pay attention to Danba's expression.And I, at this time, squinted at Danba's face.

Obviously, he lied.

Not wanting to look at him again, I turned and walked towards the stairs.He raised his hand to touch the center of his eyebrows, only to realize that his eyebrows were furrowed unknowingly.With a self-deprecating smile on the lips, why am I doing this?

I was disliked by so many people before, Sanjay Gyatso, Lhazang, and the great master... I thought that there would always be someone who would understand and support, even if he just didn't object to this love that is not allowed by the world.But I was wrong.So many high-ranking people did not overwhelm me, but now a mere acolyte gave me an unprecedented blow.

Cangyang Gyatso has spent so much time trying to hide it from me, he knows it all.He is so loyal to Tsangyang Gyatso, yet he still wants to reveal the news to me behind his back.Perhaps it is because of that loyalty, so simple and pure that it cannot tolerate me.

There was another wry smile on his lips.I spread out my clenched palms, and a few red and deep nail prints came into view, like pairs of mocking eyes.Maybe what Diba said is right, the sky will not bless us, let alone the common people in the world.

It's just... I glanced sideways at Danba who was trailing behind me, and I couldn't help having doubts in my heart.It's not the first day that Danba knew about my relationship with Tsangyang Gyatso. He never seemed to be hostile to me, so why at this time?Could it be... what happened outside has been serious enough to be detrimental to Tsangyang Gyatso?

With this level of conjecture, I immediately calmed down.After shaking the palm, cold sweat broke out.In the end, I didn't think carefully, and I forgot that there is such a possibility.

Suddenly I stopped, and I turned to look at Danba.He froze for a moment, his eyes met, but the expression on his face became stiff.

"What the hell is going on outside?"

Danba looked at me for a long while without speaking, but his eyes turned red.Seeing him like this, I was inexplicably scared, and subconsciously didn't want to ask any more questions, but my reason told me no.Sucking my nose, I calmed down and just wanted to speak...

"Dawa Dolma—"