Death Beliefs

After looking at the house, I took a walk and took a taxi to go home. The sudden cooling outside made me unbearable, and I wished I could fly back.

The gray sky in the afternoon seemed to be snowing at night, and the streets were full of sparse pedestrians rushing by wrapped in tight clothes. I stared at the flashing scene outside the car window in a daze.

The taxi driver is a person who can't stand the silence, talking to me, trying to chat a few words, I'm not in the mood, really, especially after knowing that for so many years, Wen Ling used me as a shield and kept me in the dark , The red heart that I hold on my chest is particularly uncomfortable.

It's no wonder that when I appeared at Wen Ling's house later, the energy revealed in the eyes of her parents looking at me was as strange as it could be.Looking back now, I finally figured it out.I hate it so much.

Suddenly, there was a "ding dong" on WeChat, and I slid away in a daze.

At this time, the driver's words, unwilling to be silent, also sounded: "Oh, little girl, what's the big deal, isn't it just a broken love? I have taken several little girls like you in this car, but you are better than them." Well, at least you are not as bold as them when you cry. You don’t know, their sadness is not as subtle as yours. I was particularly impressed by one, she kept yelling about how inappropriate we are, you Why do you want to break up?"

The uncle driver seemed to be a showman, and howled a few words like that girl, I got goosebumps all over my body.

I was just about to say how sad I was, when I saw a drop of unknown liquid on the screen of my mobile phone, ah, so I actually cried without knowing it?That was really sad.

The message on WeChat was sent to me by Zhang Mianyang. I checked WeChat with him at noon, and now he sent a message.He didn't even have a question mark, thinking that I had declared myself.

I wiped my tears, and angrily replied with the word "person". After a second, his message appeared on my screen again, and I could imagine how cute he was on the other side—"Okay Coincidentally, I'm human too."

Zhang Mianyang didn't talk about work with me. He should have read my profile in advance and knew that I was just a small assistant. I didn't know what I was doing every day after being busy in the office. During the peak season, I circle around the copier almost every day, and sometimes I admire myself, I can actually live as the kind of person who circles around the copier, I even wish I was a machine, automatic, Or simply live like an old donkey, who can grind for a whole day while blindfolded, and the work efficiency is quite high.

Zhang Mianyang's career is similar to mine, but he has innately created conditions, so he has become the type of person in the company who directs small people like me to rush in and out. He is self-employed, He is very thoughtful, but that is only limited to having ideas at work. If he had more ideas about life, he would never be reduced to face-to-face blind date with me now. Maybe the champagne beauty can play both sides. Don't live too extravagantly in that day.

Regarding the content of Zhang Mianyang's work, I really mustered up the courage to ask. If my mother heard my greetings to Zhang Mianyang's work, she would raise her shoes again. My mother had repeated it before. She warned me earnestly——"Girls, be reserved. When you're on a blind date, you just sit down. I don't know your mouth. Running and running can scare people away. Do you hear me? Talk less and talk less." Eat and do more."

My mother is really a person who knows me quite well, and she asked me to do more without hesitation.

But I can't control my curiosity. I think I'm quite reserved. At least I didn't ask the other party if he has a car or a house. Although it is written in the information, it is not as true as the person concerned.

Of course, I really don't care whether the other party has a car or a house. I just rush to every blind date feast with the intention of falling apart every time. I do it entirely for the task, so that my mother can practice A diamond heart.

After a week of chatting happily with Zhang Mianyang holding the mobile phone, my WeChat chat interface finally got rid of the repeated bombardment of various official accounts and group messages, as well as the few words with Zhang Mianyang, and jumped out to two other people .One is Lu Qin and the other is Xi Xiang.

Lu Qin showed me her campus in Tibet. Through the screen, I could feel the coldness of nature. I thought the city I stayed in was enough to make me sleepy. When I Seeing those fine snows, I am very glad that the city I live in is not ready for a night of heavy snow in this season. I am really happy, except for the delay when I get up every day and stick my head out to the cold air. In 10 minutes, the number of times I was late for work increased almost proportionally, and I didn't feel any discomfort because winter was coming.

Lu Qin said: "Xiao Xuan, hey, I went to self-study at 6:6 this morning. It was 10:10. I almost fainted in the classroom. Do you know the smell in the classroom? It's really indescribable, not ordinary. The smell is terrible, the students have never taken a shower, really, really it is an indescribable smell, similar to the smell of public toilets, not exaggerating at all, and then I really couldn't breathe, and I almost fell down in the last [-] minutes On the podium, I had no choice but ran to the door of the classroom and squatted for [-] minutes, and I was not energetic all day." Then there were three "crying" emoticons.

At that moment, I seemed to smell a strange smell through the screen again. The most terrible thing was that she immediately sent me a picture of their toilet. At that time, I was holding the pot that my mother gave me I was drinking the porridge, and while I was blowing hot, I swiped my phone and stuffed it into my mouth. My mother watched me eating breakfast opposite me, and couldn't help but commented - "You eat so ugly" .

"It's so hot, Mom, show me how you eat like an elegant lady!"

I continued to keep pushing, keeping my head down, staring at the time on my phone, silently calculating if I would be late today, and completely ignoring that picture of a dirty toilet I just saw, honestly, to change Normally, I would definitely not be able to eat. Who knew I would have such a good appetite today.

When I finally finished the bowl of hot porridge, my mother pushed the bread in front of me again, "Just eat a bowl of porridge, I will be hungry soon, you can eat a few more pieces of bread, get up early tomorrow, I will give it to you. "In the end, he looked at me with weird eyes again, "Is it true that you don't need your mother to send you to work?"

"Yeah. I don't want you to send it. I had a good time squeezing the subway. It's just that the smell inside is a bit unpleasant."

I responded indiscriminately, then picked up the prepared bag and keys, and flew out at a speed of sprinting [-] meters.

My mother still sat at the dining table and ate her breakfast leisurely. She just said the latter sentence casually, because I "served it" when interpreted from her way of thinking.

My mother is very happy now, the company is within a radius of ten miles of her, 10 minutes away, not only that, she only needs to clock in at the company on time, as for things like office work, she doesn’t need to bother her, she usually stays at home Watching those bloody romance dramas directly led her to always think that as long as I persevere in blind dates, I will definitely find the right one.

My mother once thought about getting me into their company. In fact, for such a manager-level person, finding a job for her own daughter is easy, just like Luo Qiang's internship in my mother's company is entirely because of her uncle That relationship, but I rejected it decisively. My ideal is not to stay in a company in peace and order. I am more yearning for challenging jobs, although when I face very challenging jobs, I often Make yourself worse than death, but I am happy.

Don't look at my mother's happiness blooming now, when she and my father just divorced, it was very difficult.She opened a barber shop and a restaurant business, but they all ended in bankruptcy. Because the investment cost was not high, the bankruptcy did not make her lose confidence in life. Instead, it aroused her infinite fighting spirit and deeply realized a truth, People like her are not suitable to be their own bosses, but should work for others.

She came to B city to develop and lived in the basement. At that time, the boss of the big company my mother worked for was also going through disasters, so they made a partner, and they have achieved today's glory.

So, people will definitely come to the end of their hardships. I envy my mother’s superiority here, but I don’t want to inherit her superiority. I want to be like her. The premise is that I can’t rely on her, I can only rely on my own efforts.

After I squeezed into the subway, I put on my headphones and listened to music, because Lu Qin sent me a voice message later, so I chatted with her and listened carefully to the radio when I entered the station. I will sit and stand, I have done such things many times, and the result is that I rushed into the office in a hurry, attracting contempt from my peers. After all, I am such a big person. Although I have just graduated, I am still a social person after all. Yes, be more steady.

Lu Qin and I were talking about some trivial things about her recently. She was very boring there, and there was no one to talk to. The only one who could talk to me was a young man who was also Han. It has been two years, and when she defined to me that he was a young man who shared the same language with her, she exclaimed: "He also watches Game of Thrones."

It is conceivable how speechless I was on the phone, but I was able to pretend nothing had happened and advance this topic with her. I thought that mutual support in different places might be able to promote a good story, and she is also like this. idea.

This surprised me. Lu Qin is the one who despises marriage the most among the few of us, and she is fully prepared not to fall in love or get married, but at this moment she told me that that young man might become her first love. Ren boyfriend, even though she still uses "boyfriend" to replace this person.

After finishing a round of chatting with Lu Qin, I'm almost at the station.I slid my fingers over the message Xi Xiang sent me last night, and after a moment of silence, I still decided not to reply.

From what I know about Xi Xiang, she does occasionally get nervous, sensational and artificial, but if I have to comment on her from the bottom of my heart, her artificiality is unprecedented in my opinion, maybe it is really Because she is good-looking and strong, people can't hate her.

She started doing webcasting in the first semester of her senior year. At that time, it was really hot, and the other five people in our dormitory would be driven crazy by her.

We all agree that Xi Xiang is full of pride, so when we saw her flattery and flattery during the live broadcast in the dormitory, it refreshed our three views, and she even flirted with someone who was just The man who accidentally entered her live broadcast room publicly discussed her breasts. What's more, she also said that she could dance a hot dance for him, and she was willing to show her thighs.

My God, when did she learn to dance? Was she trying to impress that man she met by chance?What a hate.

The disintegration of our relationship with Xi Xiang began at that time. We couldn't stand Xi Xiang anymore. Not only did we gradually become unfamiliar with her life, but we also felt disgusted by her behavior. The third-rate dirty jokes spit out from her mouth frequently, and we couldn't let us sit in the dormitory without hearing it. We were no less than going through calamities every day.

In the last semester of my senior year, I was busy with internships and graduation thesis, so I didn’t stay in the dormitory for a long time. I can say that I drove myself into an ant on a hot pot non-stop. The same is true for Yan, so when the relationship between the six of us suddenly faded, the friendship between Le Yan and I increased unexpectedly.

Each of us is busy, whether it is work or studies, but Xi Xiang is the only one who enjoys immersing herself in the webcast room where she can show her beauty, and laughs and laughs with those people on time every day.So, we gradually learned to be indifferent to each other.

"I'm his canary in the cage, for him to watch, not for fun, he has a place for his sensuality, and I'm just a place for him to visit occasionally" - these words appear on Xi Xiang's Weibo Bo, and after I saw it, we were already scattered in the end of the world.

I don’t know how Xi Xiang is doing. She used to long to study in Japan, and she has been fully prepared for this wish in four years of university. But after graduation, Lu Qin told me that Xi Xiang didn’t go to Japan. At first, I thought it was because of her. However, Lu Qin smiled sarcastically: "Why do you think she is live broadcasting? It is to save money, but I heard that she has been live broadcasting for so long, and she doesn't seem to make much money. I guess she even paid for taxis. None paid back."

Although I cared about Xi Xiang, I also put away that concern when people got dizzy from being too busy. I really knew very little about Xi Xiang later, so I teased Lu Qin: "Hey, you Waiting for the interview notice from Tibet in the dormitory, Ganqing is also listening to the corner."

Lu Qin looked at me very painfully: "I feel sick just listening to it, okay, she has no limit to dirty jokes, how did you get so close to her before..."

Lu Qin shook his shoulders with a look of unbearable.In fact, Lu Qin is not the kind of old-fashioned person. She and I have always been connected with each other. We chatted happily when we were together, but when it comes to Xi Xiang, she has a big prejudice. To put it bluntly, she doesn’t like it. Xi Xiang's deeds, which have emerged in college, but because of her face and accumulated plastic friendship, she chose the resolute path of enduring humiliation, forcing herself to flirt with Xi Xiang occasionally on a whim.

"Don't talk about me and her. You hate her so much, but you care about her more than me. You two are really inseparable... You are the only one who knows everything about her. Look, if it weren't for you Tell me, I don't even know."

"You think I want to know so thoroughly... It's not because she moves too much... Let me tell you, she wore a pair of super short pants and entered our bathroom that day, and she broadcast live in it for at least three hours. I almost suffocated myself, I wanted to go to the bathroom when she came in..."

"You don't know how to knock."

These sisters shrink their heads and tails, they are stronger than me, they are really convinced, they can hold back the three urgency, I am afraid they want to explode their bladders.

"I don't know why, I just don't want to talk to her, even knocking on the door to go to the toilet, I don't want to."

"..." How disgusting it is!