critical value

That's right, in the days that followed, I was completely dominated by my brother...

That day, the little lunatic recalled the fear of being dominated by his brother, and the humiliation of being almost tortured...

In fact, it’s not so pure. It’s the first time, it’s actually not. I feel that I’m actually a very hypocritical person. Although I recall fear and humiliation after being dominated by my brother, there are actually other things. After all, we It's a brother, he can be seen everywhere in the unclear memory of those few years in childhood.

Those few years were still very pleasant, with my brother and some friends, before grandpa passed away.

In fact, I can’t remember the specifics, but I still remember a lot of bad things——

For example, sometimes I would go to his small apartment in the school district. I don’t know if it was his preference, and I would completely decorate it in Japanese style.Of course, these are not important, although because of these things, when I saw a cheap apartment in the small town at the foot of the mountain, I couldn’t resist the charm of "cheap sale" and bought it. I subconsciously made a Japanese style apartment. decoration.

Of course, these are not important, what is important is the damage at those times.His high school is a very, very ghostly high school. Of course, most high schools are like this. In winter, he has to go to class in the cold wind, and he doesn’t want to have a holiday until the streets are full of New Year’s. Office workers are working more days.At those times, a few days before the winter vacation, he was free during the exams, so I went to him and bought a bunch of cannons in the small shop downstairs, and then the two of us turned off the lights and played with them in a gloomy manner. Or ignite it and throw it directly from upstairs......

It is often hung on the protective fence downstairs, crackling and making noises. It just so happens that the student living downstairs has raised a puppy against the rules. The landlord didn't find out for half a year, and it turned out that when the firecrackers were blown up, I yelled "Wow, woof, woof" for a long time, and finally was confiscated by the landlord and thrown on the street...

My brother and I have killed a dog...

Sometimes when he was finally free, I would look for him and ask him to take me out to play games. Those times often coincided with bad weather, such as strong wind, heavy rain, heavy snow, I was freezing to death, or I was so sunburned that I could get heatstroke. At this time, I saw a slide for young people not far away. Two people got into it, and then scribbled on the slide with correction fluid and correction tape. .

When he was in school, he lived in the school district room for a long time. There was a rather ugly old lady who cooked for him and cleaned the room. My brother said that he didn't tell the old lady more than one piece of "The Peacock Flies to the Southeast" in three years of high school.Then I used this as an excuse to tell Ma Ma and grandpa that my brother was very lonely and always went to the school district to harass him.

Because my elementary school is nearby, my grandfather just didn’t bother to buy two school district rooms. The Shijia mansion where grandpa and the two Ma Ma lived was also an old villa in the mountains and forests, so it happened to let my brother and I live together. Anyway, the school district room is It's a small broken apartment, but the area is enough, much larger than my Japanese-style decoration of 20 square meters......

I lived with my brother for two years, and we were squeezed together in the same bed when it was cold. In the end, we were separated abruptly because he was going to take the college entrance examination.In fact, it is not true. Grandpa’s health deteriorated that year, so he moved to the small villa in the urban area at the foot of the mountain with the two moms. I have no reason to stay there anymore...but

In short, during those two years, I was waiting for him every day when he came home. It was boring for me to wait alone, so I turned on the computer, had a password, entered his birthday, turned on the computer, casually rummaged through the hard disk, and found some very popular game play.

Probably he had expected that I would do this a long time ago, and hid all the R.18 games, so I didn't find them.

Seeing that it was almost time to play, I turned off the computer, pretended that nothing had happened, ran downstairs and waited for him while swinging, and saw a bunch of cronies behind him from a distance, but he was alone. People walk in front, looking lonely...

Of course, this is not important, although because at that time, I saw that lonely figure under the pale light almost every day for two consecutive years, but at that time my brother's image in my heart was still very big, which made me feel uncomfortable in the future. I like lively and cute girls, but I like guys who are alone and turn around, especially those with weird personalities...

In fact, if you think about it carefully, maybe it wasn't my brother who broke me, why did he break me?Because my brother is obviously 6 years older than me, but the people I like later, whether it's Zhang Weiran, Epilepsy or many girls who hang around, are all younger than me.Doing the math, Zhang Weiran is 3 years younger than me, epilepsy is 6 years younger than me, and there is a junior high school student in the next city who is 10 years younger than me...

I almost spit out a mouthful of old blood, is it because my heart is relatively naive?Am I naive?I am obviously a crazy driver, although my hobby is to pretend to be pure...

Sometimes my brother was in a bad mood, and would go upstairs without looking back while complaining to me about teachers, school, friends and ex-girlfriends.In fact, at that time, I could see that he was very suspicious, because most of the time he wondered whether his girlfriend was in two boats, whether his friend stabbed him secretly, whether his teacher was trying to curry favor with our father, his school Do you want to kick him out...

At that time, I concluded that he needed to calm the nerves + nourish the brain, because he was suspicious, and suddenly felt that her female ticket was a lace, his friends were all ghosts, his teacher was an alien, and his school didn’t actually exist.... .. Then he ran over with a painful experience, held my shoulder with a very serious look, and said, "Little lunatic, your brother and I may be dead, you may be dead, and all human beings may be dead But everyone can't accept such an ending, so they created this world, in fact, we don't exist..."

At that time, I could only put on a picture——"The little lunatic doesn't understand anything" and said: "Aha?"

In fact, he was neither Zhou Yu nor Cao Cao at that time. It was just a very simple second grade + teenager plot + tragic heroine plot, without any social harm. He changed after his grandfather passed away, and he changed a lot.

Before that, he still told me the little things he suspected, and then he tried to find a way to let go; but after that, he didn't tell me anything, and he didn't tell anyone else, and he was all alone. In my heart, this is even more difficult to let go.I know that feeling very well, because I often don't tell others about sad things for the sake of face.

If you hold everything in your heart, you will easily go crazy. After a few days, your whole person will become ruthless and irritable. My brother and I are like this, but my symptoms are constantly changing and intermittent. Intermittent, elusive, and my brother couldn't hold it in the first place.

It is worth mentioning that my tyrant attributes turned into charm instead. A little friend with epilepsy ran over to report and emphasized that this sentence was said by epilepsy himself-"I like people who are a little bit fierce from time to time. , it won't be boring to get along with each other that way."

He also said that I was shaking M, and he obviously was shaking M...

But when I went to him to confirm later, he looked up at me with a cute face and said, "You can die~"

Zhang Haoran would also laugh very happily when I tortured and killed the whole audience, tortured the captured younger brothers of other families, abused my own younger brothers, or even self-mutilation. I once used him after I swung a knife and completely sneaked into the slaughter with a cold weapon. All the literary talents uttered the most elegant sentence in this life-"A man should kill a man".Although the frowning and phoenix eyes are frowning and the smile is creepy and coquettish, but in my eyes, I don't know why she is so shy...

Hey, I'm spoiling again. If I'm not careful, I don't know if it's because I've been alone for too long. Whenever I think of the two of them, my heart will always be full of enthusiasm...

Then think about my brother, even the warmest scene doesn’t feel like a spring heart, let alone a wolf’s blood boil, it’s just a very ordinary nostalgia, at most it feels like drinking 999 cold spirit, warm and very intimate......

Speaking of the warmest scene, the first thing that comes to mind is that sometimes he is in a good mood, and he would nest with me in the swing after school. The two of us were swinging side by side while eating spicy sticks. At that time we I eat almost all the spicy bars in the world, but I complain more and get less likes. The dialogue with the highest probability of occurrence is——

"Brother, don't you think it smells like stinky feet?"

"Crazy, has he ever eaten stinky feet?"

"..."

"Well, yes, the smell of stinky feet, in fact, brother also thinks so..."

The pale light shone on the figures of the two people swinging back and forth, and it seemed that several moments overlapped unconsciously, bringing back painful memories for me.

The painful memories usually happen during the summer vacation, which is the longest vacation for my brother, and we can get bored in the old Shi family house.At the same time, it is also the semester with the longest exam time. The final exam is very sparse, and then the academic level test is required after the final exam. It takes almost a week to finish the final exam.

Especially because my brother is still very willful. Although I don't know why he obediently waits for the bell to ring during the final exam, but he has always handed in the papers in advance during the academic proficiency test.I saw that he came back early, and he caught him playing games secretly, so I pretended to know nothing and changed the subject, and asked, "Brother, why did you come back so early today? Isn't it just an hour away?" Are you done with the exam?"

Then he got the trick with a contemptuous look, regardless of whether I was playing games or not, buying equipment randomly while scolding his little friends, but he said in a stern tone: "The academic level test is so simple. I finished it in 20 minutes for my brother~”

Afterwards, the two of them ran downstairs to play, bought the kind of popsicles that the two of them ate together, and then went to play on the swing.

Sometimes my elder brother had time to tease me. At that time, the swing downstairs was still tied with tires on iron chains. He stuffed me into the tires, and then stepped on the other side, swinging higher and higher, almost the same as the swing. The ground is parallel.I was stunned, and seeing him looking very proud, smiling badly behind his back, he suddenly threw me out and fell into the lawn behind him...

A long time later, when I went to high school, I was forced by my elder sister to study liberal arts. I spent the whole three years of high school in her complaints: "Why are you so stupid." Sigh—"If only I were as smart as my brother."

Eh?No, I majored in liberal arts, my brother majored in science, and he is seriously partial to majors!"Peacock Flies to the Southeast" in the first year of high school has not been memorized until the college entrance examination... And if I am stupid, I will be fooled by my brother repeatedly during the summer vacation. My brother fell to the ground...

But in the end, even if he was stupid, he was recruited by a seemingly famous polytechnic institute in Northeast China because of his good grades in science.

At this time, I don’t know why I suddenly remembered a post from Yanling Saber Bar, saying that the nobles in the Spring and Autumn and Warring States were all on horseback and off their horses, anyway, they were both civil and military.Afterwards, there was a reply from a man of God - "Hei Shi will see this article, and can't help but sigh - 'My bosom friend!'".

Why does it feel like this topic hits my brother...

want to laugh.

At this time, when I think back to our past, I don’t know why I can’t help but want to laugh.That kind of smile may be very gratifying, or it may be like seeing a child playing, but in short, it is warm and caring.

I always forgive my brother easily.During that summer vacation, even if he threw me off the swing, I was still crying miserably, and the next day I sat on the swing again and let him swing me, and then I was thrown off again... for a few days in a row That's right, until we got back to the Shi family mansion.At that time, it wasn't that I didn't doubt whether he did it on purpose, but for some reason, he just didn't have a heart. At that time, my brother still said a few words to me in front of my grandpa, saying that I don't hold any grudges.

As he said, I don't hold grudges, and as I feel, I forgive my brother easily.

So, even if he almost killed me, because it has already happened, because if there is a chance, I still want to be like before my grandfather passed away, the two of us are tired of playing and making trouble together, so I still choose to forgive and am willing to help him.

It's my brother after all.

The author has something to say:

I feel that the Annoying Monologue is the one that reveals the most secrets. Let’s open it up for others to read... The memories of Big Sister Tou and Zhang Weiran are rubbish... Come back after finishing the Annoying Monologue It will be over in two or three chapters~ If you are in a good mood, read a few episodes, you should be able to read, after all, I have opened up a lot of brain holes for this work...

PS: This article is a bit messy... After all, it's the first time I write 4000 words...