critical value

In fact, I still wanted to see Shi Xiaofeng at that time, but I don't know why... Even if I still clearly remember the mood at that time, what was I thinking at that time.But now it seems that when I think about it rationally or irrationally, no matter how "logical reasoning" is, I can't get the real and accurate mood at that time.

I guess emotional experts can't solve it well...

Why do you want to see him so much, but when you see him, you can’t feel any joy in your heart, instead it’s all pain; why do you want to see him so much, sometimes you see him alone At that time, I was also alone, but I would deliberately avoid them, and I wouldn't even look at each other.

But as expected, I still want to see him very much. Every time I pass by like this, and then become alone again, I always think about him.

--do you know?Only when two people really miss each other can we always meet by chance like we do.

There is indeed a miraculous tacit understanding between us, or Shi Xiaofeng's EQ is higher than I imagined, and he is more understanding; in fact, there is another possibility, that is, my EQ is too low, and Shi Xiaofeng understands my skills. It is an essential human skill.

In short, it doesn't matter which one it is, anyway, it is a way of expression in the end.

When I saw Shi Xiaofeng recently, when we were all alone, I deliberately didn’t look at him. According to his habit, at least according to my understanding of him, he should come over and pat me, and then say: “Hey Epilepsy!" That's right, and usually they will talk to me about some things in a mess.

But now it's gone. There is a weird tacit understanding between us, that is, when I ignore him, he ignores me.For example, when I pass in front of him, he will hide in a small corner, and even jump directly from the stairs to avoid me on purpose. When he passes behind me, he will also put himself in a good position Hiding, once I walked in a very narrow corridor with no place to hide, and when I got to the hall, I saw Shi Xiaofeng flashing out from behind me.

——I guess he may have been walking behind me for a long time...

At that time, inexplicably, I started to torture myself again. When I first saw him flashing out from behind me, it was like a conditioned reflex, and my heart twitched... This feeling has never been explained. In the article, even if the author described this feeling, he did not give any explanation...

I guess, I should be ashamed again... I actually don't care about Shi Xiaofeng as much as I imagined, I don't know him as well as I imagined, and I don't think about him all the time like the protagonist of humanities novels, because If I really did this, even if it was just a little bit, I should be able to feel Shi Xiaofeng——he has been walking behind me for so long...

I don't know what he was thinking when he followed behind me.

There is also that when I occasionally pass by him, he suddenly turns his head to look at me. I guess there must be a certain level of tacit understanding between us, otherwise it would not be like a heartbeat. It's like sensing, you can find the other person without even using the corner of your eye...

In fact, recalling carefully, we were in a slightly earlier time, and the situation was not so embarrassing. At that time, although he was still speechless, when he saw me, he sometimes greeted me like "Hey!", I heard him like this, Although I was still very ashamed and didn't dare to look at him directly, I would still pretend to be like that and say to him, "Hey!".After all, he is also the chief. What did an unknown person like me do? If he didn't say anything, he probably wouldn't know...

At that time, I actually still had this kind of fluke mentality, with a pitiful, melancholy and sentimental look, and silently accepted his indescribable favor to me at that time.Although I still felt pain at the time, it is actually a good memory when I think about those days when I avoided each other.

Maybe I did something wrong, which made Shi Xiaofeng suddenly look like this.

Thinking back carefully, I am afraid it was at that time——

It's quite strange to say that that afternoon, I just came back from the outside, and before I entered the hall, I saw Shi Xiaofeng stuck in the door by his group of younger brothers who had a good relationship but didn't know me well, and tied him up. He is dead, but he is still the same as before, grinning with a wide heart, this time I have to go a little bit off topic-in fact, I always think he looks good when he smiles.

I walked over silently, and the younger brothers blocked the door, holding a key and threatening Shi Xiaofeng over there: "Shi Xiaofeng, this is the last key."

I was not very sober that day, because I kept wearing that white coat against the temperature, and I felt like I was about to be tanned as a dog outside. The coat was not breathable, and I really felt like a dog. Sweating with tongue--unconscious from the heat.

And when I walked up the few steps in front of the building, I saw Shi Xiaofeng, and my heart was already trembling. At this time, when I heard someone call his name, it was even more like this. , The smoke is not sober.

In fact, it’s not that bad, he just wanted to enter the hall, his group of younger brothers blocked the door again, and he was not very sober that day, in fact, he wanted to playfully pat a certain brother to let him get out of the way quickly Shi Xiaofeng proves that I am Mingsao recently.But it was accidentally photographed on the wall, and that brother was also quite winking, and stepped aside.

Then, out of nowhere, another person came over and asked me what was wrong with me today. It was only the next day that I learned from this person that Shi Xiaofeng was actually yelling at me at that time: "Brother! Help me!" But I slapped the wall. just go...

Shi Xiaofeng wouldn't get angry like this, and of course, I wouldn't treat him like this at all.

In fact, my EQ should be higher, because Shi Xiaofeng, even if I don't treat him like that, he will never be angry... My EQ should be higher, if it can be higher, At that time, I should have realized that Shi Xiaofeng had become as indifferent as me, and it wasn't an emotional problem.

He is not that kind of person.

It became like this because of something else, something more important and much more important than two people entangled like snakes.And his indifference is not because of anger at me or anything else, because he faintly reveals the reason for happiness, but because he wants to protect me...

Protect me from all the shit he's been through...

should be.