How to break into Liaozhai

"Ahhhhhhhhh-"

Wang Rui found that he was constantly landing, and Qionglou Yuyu appeared one after another below, with towers, pavilions and pavilions, forming a continuous piece.

There is also a big tree piercing the sky, as if the palace is in its shadow.

As Wang Rui landed, he saw a burly man under the tree chopping down the trunk with an ax, and beside him lay a big white rabbit leisurely.

The reason why he called it the big rabbit was because the rabbit was really big, as big as a mature horse.

The two ears are carried behind the head, like two white drills.

Because Wang Rui yelled too loudly, both the man and the rabbit looked up at him, showing terrified expressions together.

Seeing the person falling from the sky hitting him, the rabbit quickly moved to the side, who knew that Wang Rui suddenly changed its direction when it moved, and the whole person quickly landed on it, and fell directly on it. It groaned when it was hit.

Wang Rui landed on the soft fur, feeling no pain at all, then touched the soft rabbit ears casually, and sat up.

"Where have I been?" He looked around in a daze.

The rabbit hopped vigorously, its ears pricked up: "Get off me!"

Rabbit can talk ah? !Eh?Wait a minute, it's not surprising that such a big rabbit can talk: "I'm going down right now, don't kick your ass."

"Don't scratch my fur, you still scratch?!" The rabbit protested, and the flesh near the fur pulled by Wang Rui kept twitching and shaking.

Wang Rui got down to the ground, and as soon as he hit the ground, he felt that his body seemed much lighter, and he jumped far away, and he jumped a long way away.

Sure enough, it is the moon, and its gravity is only one-sixth of that of the earth.

"Is this the Moon Palace?" Wang Rui pointed to the building behind him and asked the white rabbit.

Rabbit raised its hind foot and scratched its chin, then looked Wang Rui up and down: "If you don't even know where this is, why did you come here? Oh, I see, you are coveting Chang'e's beauty, come to peek Right, hey hey hey, let me tell you, you made a wrong calculation."

"I didn't come to see Chang'e. I flew here after drinking a bowl of tea." Wang Rui looked around anxiously: "I want to know how to get back."

The rabbit glanced at the man who felled the tree, one person and one rabbit looked at each other and shook their heads, and then said to Wang Rui: "You should give up the idea of ​​leaving as soon as possible, it is impossible for you to leave."

It stood up and patted Wang Rui's shoulder with its front foot: "To tell you the truth, I am in need of a helper to pour the medicine here, and you came just in time."

The three-petal mouth of the big rabbit was moving, which made Wang Rui very uncomfortable: "You are the jade rabbit who smashes medicine in the middle of the month?" He glanced at the man who felled the tree: "Isn't he Wu Gang?"

The man was still sharpening his axe: "You know me?"

Wu Gang punished Gui and did useless work. Of course Wang Rui knew about it.

Considering that Wu Gang was working hard on the moon and imprisoned, Wang Rui suddenly understood why Yutu said it was impossible to leave.

He had a headache: "I have a friend who is a fairy, and he followed me when I flew here, but he was suddenly blocked by something on the way, and I was the only one who flew here, what happened? ?”

Rabbit snorted and said, "It was blocked by the barrier, not to mention that he is an ordinary god, even a Shangxian, and he can't come here without the Jade Emperor's will. No one is allowed to disturb the Moon Palace."

"why?"

"Because this is the place where the elixir is made for the Queen Mother."

"I thought that because there was Chang'e here, there would be a lot of gossip at the widow's door."

Wu Gang let out a long sigh, and tried his best to chop the trunk. Seeing that the osmanthus tree was about to be cut off, suddenly at this time, the trunk of the osmanthus tree healed quickly and became intact again.

Wu Gang swung the ax again helplessly, Wang Rui couldn't stand it anymore; "Don't cut it down, keep cutting it down."

"This is my fate."

Wang Rui only knew that Wu Gang felled the tree, but he didn't know the specific reason. He wondered what was wrong with you and you would be punished by the sky.

But now is not the time to care about other people's suffering. He should worry more about himself. He sighed sadly: "It's been so many years, and you can't escape the punishment of cutting down trees. It seems that there is really no way to escape from here."

"That's right, honestly help me make the medicine." The white rabbit said, "It just so happens that I've been lazy for a while, and today I'm just in time for the construction period, so I'll go get the medicine pestle."

Not far away, there is a large medicine vat for pounding medicine, which is half the height of a person.

"Wait a minute! I won't work for you. I'm not from the Moon Palace, nor arranged by the Heavenly Court. According to the logic, I'm an illegal immigrant. Any of you should report me."

The rabbit was speechless: "Why are you so lazy? Someone must not understand your behavior, so they gave you the elixir and flew up here to take revenge on you."

Wang Rui just sat down on the ground and carefully recalled his experience. He didn't provoke anyone. Could it be that another black hand under the heaven decided to lock him up as a black household?

No way, although Heavenly Court is despicable, it still seems to fulfill its promise.

Did he offend some god or monster?No, if he offends, he offends his parents, and if he comes out of the closet by force, he will be cut off.

It can be seen that the Moon Palace is really not a good place. Listening to the tone of the rabbit, it is simply a place of exile.

Seeing Wang Rui's frowning, the rabbit jumped in front of him: "In the long years, you have to find a job to make a living, otherwise you will be suffocated to death."

Wang Rui was taken aback, what if he died of starvation on the moon palace, what would happen to his soul, would he be able to return to the underworld, or would he still be wandering in the moon palace?

No, he is a soul from another world, and he will not go to the underworld after death. Is it true that he will be trapped in the moon palace forever?

No, He Yunyi must have a way to save himself.

Wang Rui sighed: "I can't be bored to death, but there's nothing to eat here. I'm probably going to starve to death." He glanced at the big rabbit, and it will eat you.

"Starved to death, what are you talking about? Since you took the elixir and flew here, you are already immortal and have the same lifespan as the moon."

Wang Rui was stunned, "happiness" came too fast, he was afraid of death all day long before, but later He Yun was able to reshape his soul and body, so he was not threatened by death.

He never expected that after taking the elixir, he would live forever.

"Am I a fairy now?"

"Unless you are born a god, only those who have been canonized by the heaven are gods. Do you have mana? Shaking your head means you don't have it. Then you are at most an immortal now."

Wang Rui looked around again, and found that apart from the closed palace, there were only Guishu, Wu Gang, Rabbit and him.

If he could live forever in this desolate place, he would rather kill him by hitting him head-on, alas, but he can't die now.

"Can't you communicate with Heavenly Court? Can't you contact them when someone invades? For example, now, quickly ask the people from Heavenly Court to catch me."

"Hey, with the barrier and the sky guarding it, who would come here?" The big white rabbit chuckled in a low voice, "And what is Chang'e like? Thousands of years have passed, and everyone already knows it well, and no one is here anymore." I admire her so-called beauty."

Aren't you her pet? How about master?

Wang Rui glanced at the gate of the Moon Palace: "With me, an outsider, why doesn't she come out to take a look? Aren't you curious?"

"This old woman has stopped, I can understand, after all, she hehehe—" The rabbit let out a series of strange laughter.

Wang Rui found that the rabbit was quite enthusiastic and his mouth was very broken. Is it because it is really too lonely here?

For those who are new to the Moon Palace and are unfamiliar with the place, it is more important to establish a good relationship with the rabbit.

Since the Moon Palace is a land of exile, there must be no news, Wang Rui rolled his eyes and thought of a plan.

"It's boring for us to stay, let me tell you a joke."

Rabbit's eyes flashed: "Joke? Tell me quickly." This moon palace has a simple population, and nothing new happens, and everyone who can chat with Wu Gang has already finished talking.

"Hey, there is a father-in-law lying on the bed, sleeping with his head covered by a quilt. At this time, the son-in-law slipped in, reached into the bed, and unbuttoned his pants. When I opened the quilt, I saw that it was my son-in-law, and he scolded him very angrily. At this time, the mother-in-law came to persuade me: "Don't blame the son-in-law, he didn't see clearly, he thought it was me."

This is an article in "Xiao Lin Guang Ji". Wang Rui doesn't take useful books to heart, and he never forgets such miscellaneous books.

The rabbit was stunned for a few seconds, blinked his eyes, and then let out a series of laughter that pierced the sky, clutching his stomach, and rolling on the ground laughing.

"No, it can't be so funny..." Wang Rui was a little scared.

Looking at Wu Gang again, Wu Gang's face turned purple from holding back, he bent over with a silent laugh, and couldn't even lift his axe up.

This spiritual life is too dry, Wang Rui lamented that the Moon Rabbit, whose laughing nerves have not been tempered, is so innocent.

With such an audience, everyone can be a master of words.

The rabbit wiped away his tears and came back to Wang Rui: "Your joke is so funny, I will live by it for the next few hundred years."

"Don't tell me, I still have them here. Let me tell you another one. After the husband died, the wife quickly fanned the husband's body with a fan. The neighbor asked: "The weather is already cold, why fan him? "The wife wiped her tears and said: "Before my husband died, he ordered: 'If you want to marry, you must wait until my flesh is cold. '"

"Hahahahaha——" the rabbit kicked his feet on the ground with a smile, rolled all over his body with dust, and seemed to be out of breath a few times.

Wang Rui then told another story: "On the wedding night, the banquet to see off the relatives dispersed. The next day, the chef cleaned up the table and found that there was no sugar figurine. He searched everywhere, and the groom suddenly burst out laughing. The bride was beside him. Asked what she was laughing at, the bride replied: "No wonder someone's tongue was so sweet last night. "

The rabbit was silent this time, Wang Rui went up to take a look, his eyes turned white, his tongue stuck out, and he lost consciousness.

Laugh, fainted from laughing?Wang Rui quickly overturned its body and pressed hard on its chest, not knowing whether cardiac pacing would work for the rabbit.

Pressing and pressing, the rabbit gradually opened its eyes, let out a long breath, and raised its front foot to wipe away its tears: "Fortunately, I am immortal, otherwise I would really die."

Wang Rui saved the rabbit, and saw that Wu Gang was already squatting on the ground, beating the ground in pain.

"You guys are exaggerating...I don't even dare to say it."

The rabbit stood up from the ground at this time, with two big paws resting on Wang Rui's shoulders: "You are responsible for telling us jokes, if you need help, just ask."

"I still want to get out of here."

"It's difficult, but it's not impossible. Sometimes a broom star will cross the moon palace and fly to the human world. If you are lucky, when the broom star comes next time, you can ride on its tail and return to the human world. "The rabbit said: "But it is very dangerous. It may catch fire in the air. The fire is so powerful that it can burn both the body and soul. Even if you have an immortal body, it is best not to try it lightly."

"Is there no other way, how about I go to tease Chang'e? Will someone from Heaven come to arrest me?"

"No one has teased her for a long time. This trick won't work, even if Tianting knows it, it won't take care of it."

"By the way, didn't you say that this is the place where the Queen Mother made medicine? When will she send someone to get the medicine?"

"Once in 500 years, these 500 years are 500 years in the sky..."

When Wang Rui heard this, he also wanted to roll his eyes, stick out his tongue, and fainted.

The rabbit didn't feel it at all, and continued to shake Wang Rui's shoulder: "Tell me one more time, and tell me another one."

Wang Rui looked at Wu Gang, seeing that he also looked expectant, so he had to clear his throat, and chose another chapter from "Xiao Lin Guang Ji" to tell them to listen to.

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha—"

The moon palace resounded with the rabbit's loud laughter, but the sound became smaller and smaller, and finally there was a hiccup. When he went up to take a look, the rabbit fainted from laughter again.

This time he knew that the rabbit was immortal, so he didn't step forward to rescue him, but looked at the looming heaven in the distance, thinking, He Yunyi, where are you, I don't want to stay here and tell jokes to the rabbit.

Because of his special talent-telling jokes, Wang Rui was regarded as a guest of honor by Rabbit and Wu Gang.

Wu Gang made an exception and brought out the sweet-scented osmanthus wine. He originally planned to brew it to honor Emperor Yan and ask him to cancel his punishment, but thinking that Wang Rui had brought him a lot of happiness, he presented the precious wine.

Wang Rui took a sip and his eyes lit up: "This is fine wine. In front of it, the wine I drank before can only be cat urine."

"You have won the prize, that is to say, it is barely worth drinking." Wu Gang said.

Rabbit said: "You are clearly very precious, I would not even taste a drop on weekdays."

"Prince Wang is a distinguished guest. How long have we known each other?" Wu Gang said sadly, "I have been here for too long."

"May I ask, what did you do wrong? To be tortured like this?"

Wu Gang didn't speak, just sighed.

"He's just like an old bored cow, let me tell." The rabbit put his front feet on the table: "He, he went out to seek immortality for three years, and when he came home, he found his wife and Emperor Yan's grandson, Boling. He had an affair and gave birth to a child, and he killed Bo Ling in a fit of anger, and Emperor Yan ordered him to chop down trees."

Wang Rui was a bit confused by this logic. He was cheated on and killed his adulterer in a fit of rage, but he was punished instead.Although it was wrong to kill, Wu Gang was clearly a victim too. Emperor Yan was so ashamed, it was clearly his grandson who killed him.

Wu Gang sighed: "For so many years, I have also wanted to open it. It was really impulsive back then. Now I have no joy or sorrow in my heart. I just ask Emperor Yan to show me his noble hand and let me go. I also know that the osmanthus tree is cut down constantly, but If I don't cut it down, he will think that I don't want to make atonement. Oh, I can't accompany you anymore, I have to cut down the tree." Then he really got up and went to round the tree again.

Rabbit is also very helpless: "He is like this, an honest man, he will be bullied."

Wang Rui took another sip of sweet-scented osmanthus wine and waited passively. He would never leave the Moon Palace. But the problem now is that he has no other choice if he does not wait passively.

After drinking, Wang Rui was a little sleepy, and the rabbit just lay down on the ground to take a nap, so Wang Rui lay down on its side and fell asleep on its soft fur.

After an unknown amount of time, he suddenly heard someone calling him, his voice turned into ashes and he could recognize it, it was He Yunyi.

He sat up abruptly: "Where are you?"

"I'm still outside the barrier. I tried my best to destroy a little bit of the barrier just now. I put a little consciousness into the barrier and finally found you. How are you doing now, okay?"

Consciousness is consciousness, Wang Rui said: "It's good, I just had a drink with the rabbit and I'm taking a nap."

"..." He Yun snorted, "It sounds very pleasant."

What are you doing sourly, Wang Rui changed his tone: "Haha, let me tell you a good thing, the rabbit said that I am immortal now."

"This is probably the only benefit you get from this incredible thing."

"Yeah, the Moon Palace is so boring! Except for a palace where Chang'e lives, there is nothing left. It's so boring." Wang Rui said, "How can I leave? Have you heard the announcement from the sky? Tell them to come and arrest me." Take it away."

"I said it, but you also know their virtue. It must be said that the Moon Palace is the place where the Queen Mother makes medicine, and it can only be opened once in 500 years." He Yunyi said angrily: "I think they clearly think that It's good that you're locked up there."

"I think so too. How does Zhengchou deal with my soul in a different world? I'm imprisoned here, which is exactly what they want. And they know that I don't like women. Living here, I'm not afraid of harming Chang'e and causing scandals. " Wang Rui said: "I heard from the rabbit that when the broom star passes by, you can ride back on its tail. Can you help me figure out when the broom star will pass by again?"

"I've already calculated, the next time, it will take 450 years in the sky."

Wang Rui thumped the ground: "Then what should I do?"

When he was extremely desperate, he heard He Yunyi humming proudly over there and said: "Actually, I have already thought of a way."

Wang Rui wept with joy, knowing that he was reliable: "Tell me quickly."

"Remember the bag I gave you, will it be on you? If so, you take out the dragon crystal inside and mash it with the laurel leaves, the dragon blood will expand tens of millions of times, and then you Use this blood to pollute the moon, so that people in the heavenly court will come to the moon palace if they find something strange, and when the time comes, as long as the barrier is opened, I will go to find you and bring you out."

"It's amazing, it's amazing!" Wang Rui said in admiration, "If it's about pranks, you're the number one."

"It's not good! The hole in the enchantment that I hit just now is almost repaired..."

He Yunyi's voice seemed to be cut off by a knife, and suddenly disappeared. Wang Rui stood up, jumped on the spot a few times, but still didn't connect again.

"Tch, is the signal interrupted?" Wang Rui rubbed the ground with his foot, and a puff of smoke rose.

At this time, the rabbit sat up sleepily, scratched its chin with its hind legs: "Why are you up, it's fine anyway."

"Can you lend me your medicine pestle and medicine jar?"

Rabbit said: "Yes, yes, but..."

Wang Rui patted his chest: "As a thank you, I'll tell you another joke."

After finishing speaking, Wang Rui took out a piece of dragon blood crystal from his pocket when the rabbit fainted from laughter, and then went to Wu Gang to gather a handful of osmanthus leaves, threw them into the medicine vat, and used the pestle. Falling down twice, the dragon blood crystal burst, and the dragon blood inside flowed out. The moment it touched the osmanthus leaf, it suddenly reacted, instantly swelled and surged, and magma gushed out of the medicine tank, flowing continuously .

At this time, some people on the earth suddenly discovered that a red dot appeared on the moon, but because the sky dawned soon, it did not cause much commotion.

At this time, the rabbit's nose moved: "What's the smell?" When he woke up, he saw red liquid flowing everywhere on the ground. The circular high wall surrounded the medicine tanks that were continuously emitting liquid. After a while, the high wall was filled with red viscous liquid.

The rabbit climbed up the high wall and dipped its paws in the liquid to taste: "Is this dragon's blood?"

After Wang Rui explained the ins and outs of the future, he said to the rabbit: "I want to smear on the moon, and the people who cover the sky will come."

After listening to the rabbit, he was stunned for a moment, and then he laughed loudly: "Interesting, interesting! This will definitely relieve boredom, Wu Gang—do you want to help?"

Wu Gang cut down the tree sincerely: "You guys make trouble, I'll do things in a proper manner."

"You'll be bullied." Rabbit waved its front paws, and said with some distaste: "There is no rule against polluting the moon, so what are you afraid of?"

But Wu Gang still shook his head and cut down his own tree. As long as he pleaded guilty and moved Emperor Yan, he would be released.

Wang Rui poured all the dragon blood crystals on the ground: "I wonder if these dragon blood crystals are enough?"

"Enough is enough!" Rabbit's three-petal mouth moved: "The key is what to paint, write? What to write? I think it is better to write dirty words."

"It shouldn't be too vulgar, but it should be meaningful, eye-catching enough to spark discussion." A qualified slogan should be like this.

The rabbit was also worried, with its furry front feet sticking its chin in a contemplative state.

"Yes!" Wang Rui clasped his hands together: "I thought of it." He pulled the rabbit's big soft ears and whispered into it.

Unexpectedly, Rabbit heard this, and was taken aback for a moment: "If you don't tell me, I'd have forgotten that besides making medicine, I also have another identity, that is, the Rabbit God, who is in charge of same-sex marriages in the world. Yuelao doesn't care about the marriages of these people. It's all assigned to me. But because I can't leave the Moon Palace, I don't like to take care of these people too much. Over the years, I almost forgot that I was still in charge of this mess."

"..." Unexpectedly, unexpectedly, you rabbit is actually a rabbit god!No wonder most sympathetic marriages in the world end in tragedy. It turns out that you have neglected your duties.

The rabbit patted Wang Rui's shoulder with its fat front paws: "Just do as you say!" Looking at the heaven, he said resolutely: "I should also swear my duty!"

How do you feel that you suddenly ignited your fighting spirit? !Wang Rui said: "Okay, let's do this."

The rabbit fell to the ground: "You ride on me, but you have to grab my ears lightly."

"Oh, how did this happen." Wang Rui sat up while talking, and when he scratched his ears, according to what the rabbit said, it was very light, just keep it from falling off.

The rabbit jumped into the air, took the pestle back into its hand, and said, "Change!" The pestle slammed into a big writing brush, dipped in the dragon's blood, pointed in the direction of the heaven and said, hehehe He said: "Put me here to make medicine, so that you can look good!"

As he spoke, he took Wang Rui to fly into the distance.

……

It was the full night of the fifteenth month again, and the bright moonlight shone on the earth. The moment people looked up at the moon, they all showed incredible expressions.

There are words on the moon!Is this an order from the heavens?

The literati and poets who were about to chant poems to the moon, when they saw the moon, their faces turned green and their mouths spurted out the wine.

……

One of the three hundred spirit officials in the Heavenly Court, who is in charge of investigating human affairs, ran towards the Jade Emperor as if he was dying.

He couldn't see the true face of the Jade Emperor, but knelt in the hall and reported to the illusory sky above: "It's not good, there is something wrong with the Moon Palace. Looking up from the human world on the ground, someone wrote words on the moon."

"...Oh? What did you write?"

"It's written...the love between a man and a man is innocent...Maybe the Rabbit God has gone crazy."

"Cough! Cough! Cough!!! Open the barrier immediately and take someone to see what's going on!"

"According to the order."