love you very special

"Are there any other symptoms besides aggravated insomnia? Or, do you keep thinking about something at night?"

Recently, Yi Chu has been coming to see a psychiatrist every week, and this situation has lasted for a year.

Not really a problem, but self-judgment.At his age, he has knowledge of vision and thinking, and he is clear enough to understand. ,

Yi Chu’s doctor is surnamed Chen. Dr. Chen graduated from a famous overseas university in psychology. Yi Chu trusts him very much, not because of the trust between friends, but because he is professional. He can really enlighten himself, even if it only lasts for a week. half a month.

Yi Chu was very cooperative, and he always expressed his true thoughts directly: "No."

Dr. Chen said, "Is your appetite normal for these three days?"

Yi Chu touched a cigarette from his body and signaled to Dr. Chen.

I have been here so many times and I will habitually ask every time I smoke.

The doctor nodded.

Yi Chu took a few sips before pinching it out: "I'm busy with work, so I don't know what to eat all day."

Dr. Chen said: "Mr. Yi, I think you should take medicine for your condition."

Yi Chu said nothing.

Dr. Chen said: "Mr. Yi went back and forth many times, and it will only get worse if it goes on like this."

Dr. Chen couldn't persuade him. This person had never opened his heart knot, even lightly hypnotized and relaxed. He was an extremely self-disciplined person.

After leaving the consultation room, Yi Chu went to the toilet to wash his face.

The person in the mirror is expensive, he is the top of the city, with high education, high income, and good looks. There is never a shortage of suitors and lovers.

What kind of psychological problems can such a person have?

Yi Chu feels extremely tired. This kind of fatigue is more tiring than studying abroad or even entering the college entrance examination. It is a feeling of powerlessness that overwhelms the whole body.

From school to work, there will always be a change, but he has felt the loneliness and emptiness of going to and from get off work alone many years in advance.

Year after year, day after day.

The neon lights illuminated the whole city, Yi Chu sat in the car with his head on the steering wheel, and fell asleep in a daze.

Waking up suddenly, Fang Jue got off work, started the car, walked out of the basement, and left.

weekend.

The weather is exceptionally good, the temperature is moderate, and it is a good day for an outing.

This is what his circle of friends has been posting for the past few days.

Yi Chu thought about being normal, for example, don't cook by himself at night, and sit alone in a big room, eating in silence, not knowing what it smells like.

I also don't want to sit on the balcony, dazed from get off work to rest at eleven o'clock on time.

Such a bustling city, the most fashionable city in China, seems to have nothing to do with him.

Yi Chu knows that he has a problem, or rather, he would rather think that he has a problem, so that he has a reason to change the status quo.

But I went to a psychiatrist so many times and told me every time, forget about the past, thoroughly cleanse the past, look around, pay attention to the people around you, there will be a colorful world.

Yi Chu didn't want to, but didn't dare.

He is afraid that he will forget the deepest thing, and he will repeat his current life, which is the happiest time in his life. If that time is cleared up, what will be left in the past 20 years?

A bunch of medals, certificates and transcripts?

These are all things to be envied and proud of.

Everything on the streets wakes up in spring, and the Niaozi Garden is along the way.

The new leaves of the thick Fatong on the side of the road, he is used to walking around this small quiet street, it is rare that there are few people in the noisy city, Yi Chu stopped by the side of the road, leaning his head on the back to rest.

There are local residents next to them, close your eyes and let go for a while.

When I opened my eyes, I found that the sun was about to set. I squinted my eyes to wake up for a while, opened the car door and went to the convenience store on the street to buy a bottle of Coke.

There's no love to this fizzy drink that's more stimulating than lukewarm water.

After drinking in one gulp, he strode back and saw a person when he opened the car door.

Yi Chu didn't know if it was because he fell asleep that he was dazzled. That person was wearing a courier suit and was helping someone to seal a package. After so many years, everything would change. Still won't change.

Originally, they shouldn't have had any intersection early on, and they shouldn't have had it from the beginning to the end.

Even if it is him, so what?Maybe the other party didn't want to let himself see such a scene.

If it wasn't for him, he would just prove himself delusional again.

Yi Chu still sat back in the car and didn't go there.

When people grow up and enter society, they will always learn patience and control.

The car moved forward slowly, and the man kept his head down to help write the express delivery slip. The moment he turned his face away unintentionally, Yi Chu collapsed completely.

He picked up the cigarette almost uncontrollably, took a few puffs and extinguished it, opened the door and walked out.

Lin Yi never thought in his life that the two would meet and reunite in such a way.

But this method is indeed the most in line with his original idea.

A celebrity who is a pillar of the country, wearing a suit and leather shoes, with neat and shiny hair, driving a luxury car, seems to be taller, is the standard elite appearance.

In contrast to Lin Yi, who was wearing a courier suit, and there was an electric delivery truck behind him, it was impossible for anyone to judge him all the way.

If it was someone else, Lin Yi would definitely feel ashamed of himself. The thing he feared most after not seeing his old classmates for many years would be comparisons, especially the huge difference.

Only for Yi Chu, Lin Yi thinks, it’s not normal for him not to be like this, he should get the best treatment from the best things in the world, after so many years, he has almost never encountered people who are better than him. more powerful people.

Both of them are standing.

Yi Chu waited for Lin to finish the matter and walked to the wooden bench under the tree by the side of the road.

Silent, looking at each other, surprised, no one is speechless.

Compared with the changes in Yi Chu's appearance, Lin Yi's whole person has changed even more. The person who used to twitter and not listen and even stuck to Yi Chu's body every day, looked a little shy.

Although pretending to smile, the whole person exudes an unsatisfactory and unhappy atmosphere.

You can even use a popular word to describe "mourning".

Lin Yi reckoned that he was still the kind of person who would not speak actively after sitting quietly with someone for an hour, so he opened his mouth first: "Xiao Zhou is resting, my friend is resting, I will help him deliver the courier, he is my friend, there are some things at home, it just so happens I'm here today on business, so I'll help him when I have time."

Yi Chu's gaze did not shift away from him for a moment, as if in a trance.

A little embarrassed, Lin Yi continued: "I really didn't expect you to come to Shanghai, shouldn't you be in Beijing?"

People have changed, why bother to find the atmosphere of the past.

chatting like strangers.

Unlike Yi Chu's initial fantasy, he would miss the reunion to the point of madness, unable to speak because of excitement, he would definitely jump up.

There is nothing like calmly narrating things.

Yi Chu opened his mouth: "I have been working for more than a year."

Lin nodded.

Yi Chu glanced at him and asked, "Why are you back?"

The implication is, after so many years, how are you willing to come back, and come back to do such a job?

Lin Yi didn't understand what he meant, so he just said, "You know I don't have anyone at home, so I can go anywhere."

Yi Chu: "I said why did you return to China?"

Lin Yi was dumbfounded.

How should he answer, he has to come back because he can’t support himself, or he can’t get used to living in a foreign country and come back, or he is not as capable as him to get a scholarship.

The conversation broke up badly.

Even when they left, they didn't even have the courage to ask for each other's contact information.

Yi Chu could hardly believe that this person was the one he thought about day and night and cried bitterly. It was a person he hid in the deepest place that he didn't want anyone to know. It was his own secret. From disappointment to fantasy, to fantasy that one day He would remember that he came to him, living on such illusions, and finally decided to forget it slowly.

When I didn't expect to forget, I suddenly met.

When we met, it was flat, but after we left, the stamina was huge, we were at a loss, our hands started to sweat, and finally we started to think about a series of bad results. How long will it take to part this time?

Back home, Yi Chu immediately opened a chat account that had been useless for many years.

After trying the password several times, the mobile phone verification was only able to log in.

The information jumps a row, but the earliest is also four years ago.

He clicked on the flashing Lin Yi's profile picture.

There are four messages in total, the last one is five years ago.

The first one is "I have too many things to send you in time, I'm sorry."

The second "Thank you."

These were posted after the accident at his home.

Article [-] after three months "What should I do, can you tell me"

Article [-] Spring Festival one year later. "Happy New Year"

Then there was no one for five years.

Yi Chu flicked the cigarette ash, and gently sent his mobile phone number.

Typed a line of words "Call here."

After sending it, it will be withdrawn after three words.

"Please call me when you have time."

Due to work reasons, Lin Yi's own WeChat account is hung up on his mobile phone every day, and he can clearly see the two messages sent, including the one that was withdrawn.

But no reply.

They are classmates, that's right, they should take care of each other in a strange city, the closest relationship.

Others can, but he can't. After much deliberation, I don't know how to deal with it.

A week later, Yi Chu sent another message.

"Lin Yi, let's meet."

Lin Yi was in his factory at the time. He had just finished his lunch and was sitting on the ground with his co-workers to rest. When he turned on his phone and saw this message, his hands trembled for some reason.

Reply with two "yes".