[Comprehensive Mythology] I don't want to have sex with you

The Wanling Water conjured by Wang Daoling is yellow horse urine, which is also mixed with horse dung, which smells coquettish.The onlookers backed away one after another, and someone said loudly, "Daoist Wang, are you nervous and not ready? Try again!"

Wang Daoling wanted to climb down the steps, but Xiaoqing said in a rough voice, "I don't think the acting was a failure, it's because he's only going to turn into shit!"

Some people firmly believe that Wang Daoling is a very powerful master, and they accuse Xiaoqing, "Don't talk nonsense if you don't understand! Wang Daoling used to become a master of all spirits and water!"

Xiaoqing said: "Don't you know? Taoists like them will use tricks. It is a piece of cake for them to turn horse urine into clean water! He is a dishonest Taoist priest. Let me see who drinks this magic water , I have diarrhea when I go home, and unless I eat the panacea he sells, I won’t be cured. I’ve seen this kind of deceiving little trick a lot!"

Wang Daoling said: "You kid, you are full of nonsense! Daoist's medicine doesn't work, everyone present can testify to me! I just made a mistake once, and it's nothing!"

A little beggar in the crowd jumped up and scolded: "You are so old, you have to show some face! I took advantage of the chaos yesterday and secretly drank a bowl of magic water from you, but it took me all night. There was nothing in my stomach. I was almost killed by your magic water!"

Everyone looked back, the little beggar's face was pale, his eye sockets were sunken, and his lips were chapped and peeled. It seemed that he was seriously ill.

This little beggar often begs on the street, and sleeps in a ruined temple in the south of the city at night. People who have lived in Qiantang for a long time know him. Since he said so, everyone believes him.

The eyes of everyone looking at Wang Daoling changed, and Wang Daoling became angry from embarrassment, "Okay! How dare you frame me!" Pointing at the little beggar, he was about to beat him.

Xu Xian stretched out his hand to stop Wang Daoling, "Don't worry, Daoist Wang, he's just a child, he's just a kid! Let's do it! I'll change the Wanling Water, Daoist Wang will take a break, and change it again later. What do you think?"

Wang Daoling nodded, and said arrogantly: "Alright then! Come and change yourself, let me see!"

Xu Xian smiled. He drew a Yin-Yang Tai Chi diagram in mid-air, and the onlookers exclaimed.Wow!Can actually draw in mid-air!

Xu Xian inserted his hands into the black and white yin-yang fish, as if entering the calm water, ripples appeared on the surface of the yin-yang diagram.

The onlookers all opened their mouths, it's terrible, where did Xu Xianggong's hand go?Why can I only see the wrist, but not the palm.

After a while, Xu Xian slowly pulled out his hand, holding a black bowl in his left hand and a white bowl in his right hand.

Aunt Wang asked anxiously: "Xu Xianggong, are these two bowls of water all spiritual water?"

"Yes, no, don't worry, ma'am, there is still the last step to be done."

Xu Xian took off the Tai Chi Yin Yang diagram that was parked in mid-air, and kneaded it into a large transparent glass bowl.Pour the water from the two small bowls created just now into the large bowl.

Just as the two kinds of water were mixed together, a fragrant breath wafted out of the big bowl.After smelling this smell, I was refreshed and exhausted. Everyone closed their eyes and smelled intoxicated.

Xu Xian poured the mixed water into two small bowls, and he picked up one bowl and handed it to the little beggar, "Come here, didn't you say you're not feeling well? Drink this water."

The little beggar stepped back, "Your magic water won't make me worse!"

Xu Xian walked over, squeezed the little beggar's mouth, and poured all the water in the bowl into it. The little beggar closed his eyes tightly, as if Xu Xian wanted to force him to drink meth.

"How do you feel?" Xu Xian asked.

The little beggar opened his eyes and tapped his mouth, "It's delicious! It's neither sweet nor salty. It doesn't taste like much, but it tastes very fragrant when you drink it. It's not floral, not powdery, or fruity. Anyway, it's fragrant!"

The onlookers were amazed, and Aunt Wang pointed to the little beggar and said, "Look, his complexion has improved a lot!"

Everyone saw that it was indeed the case, the little beggar's face became rosy, and his eyes became brighter.

"It's amazing! Mr. Xu, you don't show off your mountains and show off your water. I didn't expect you to be so capable."

Xu Xian cupped his hands modestly, "I made everyone laugh!"

There was still a bowl of water left on the table, and Xu Xian held the bowl and handed it to Wang Daoling, "Wang Taoist, would you like to taste my Wanling Water? After all, no matter how nice I say, it's better to try it yourself, right? My Wanling Water not only cures all diseases, but also prolongs life. That's right! It can also make monsters show their original shape!"

The onlookers asked: "Xu Xianggong, there are still monsters in this peaceful and prosperous world?"

Xu Xian scratched his head foolishly, "My master said there are, but I haven't seen them."

The onlookers laughed kindly, and those who were not afraid of big things followed suit, "Daoist Wang, try it! I think the water looks really good."

Wang Daoling was a little timid in his heart, this young man has some skills, if the water can really make the monster appear, then he will be exposed!

Xiaoqing deliberately provoked him, "That Taoist priest, say something! You can't be cowardly! Everyone, look at him, he is cowardly!"

Someone also echoed in a low voice, "I think he must be scared!"

"That's right! What a coward! The magic water he made must be fake! You see, the water made by Xu Xianggong is very fragrant, but his water is tasteless, and this time it turned into horse dung!"

Wang Daoling felt extremely uncomfortable after hearing what these people said.He was more than 1000 years old, and he fell into Xiaoqing's aggressive method in one fell swoop.

Picking up the bowl of water, Wang Daoling said gruffly, "Just drink it! What's the big deal!"

After gulping down a bowl of water, Wang Daoling heaved a sigh of satisfaction, the water was really delicious.Drinking it is cold in the mouth, but the water becomes warm and warm when it flows into the stomach.

Throwing down the bowl casually, Wang Daoling said disdainfully: "You don't do very well with this Wanling water! I don't feel anything after drinking it!"

The little beggar pointed at him and said, "You're lying! I saw you burp! You've had a good drink!"

The crowd of onlookers said: "That's right, let's slap your mouth after drinking!"

"Wang Taoist lost this time, right?"

"I must have lost! Mr. Xu is the best!"

Wang Daoling was ashamed by everyone's words, and he said angrily: "This time it doesn't count! Let's compare how to make a panacea!"

Before Xu Xian agreed, Aunt Wang pointed at Wang Daoling and said, "Master Daoist! You have a rash on your face! Oh, this is so scary!"

Wang Daoling touched his face, it's too bad!He is about to show his original shape, the skin on his face has turned into toad skin. "I... I'm not feeling well, I'm going back."

Xu Xian shouted: "Master Wang, don't you want to compete?"

"No more comparisons! No more comparisons!" Wang Daoling didn't pack up his things, turned around and was about to leave in a hurry.

It's a pity that it was too late, before Wang Daoling had time to cast a spell to escape, he showed his original shape.

A Taoist priest turned into a toad, and people on the street were terrified and ran away screaming.There were too many people standing at the intersection just now. The screams of women, the sharp cries of children, and the voices calling for relatives and friends were in a mess, and the scene was extremely chaotic.

Xu Xian stood on the table and shouted: "Everyone, don't panic, listen to me! Protect the women and children around you and get into a nearby shop, I'll get rid of this monster!"

Everyone was also frightened. With Xu Xian's advice, they hid in the shop one after another, bolted the door, and those who were brave opened a small window to peek outside.

Wang Daoling was lying on the ground dizzy. He vaguely heard Xu Xian say that he wanted to get rid of the demon, so he jumped forward with all his strength.

Xu Xian jumped in front of Toad Jing, steadied his horse, and pinched the magic formula with his hands.He gestured towards Bai Suzhen, and Bai Suzhen smiled in the dark.

The big toad/toad lying on the ground spat out human words, "Boy, you have already seen that I am a goblin! Today you deliberately set a trap to kill me, right?"

Xu Xian said innocently yet frightened: "I've never seen a goblin before, I, I didn't do it on purpose!"

"Hmph! Whether you did it on purpose or not, you're going to die today!"

Ha/Toad Jing jumped forward and rushed towards Xu Xian's face.Bai Suzhen cast a spell to stir him up, and the slut jumped into the air, a white light flashed, as if a rope had caught him before him, and he fell to the ground all at once.

At the same time, Xu Xianping pushed out his palms, took a few steps back exaggeratedly, fell to the ground softly, and spat out a mouthful of blood.

Xiao Qing rolled her eyes while hiding in the shop, Xu Xian's acting was too fake, Toad Jing hasn't met him yet!He himself fell down.

"Oh! Mr. Xu is injured!"

Aunt Wang's chubby body was crowded at the window, and she described Xu Xianggong's battle with the toad spirit to those who hadn't seen it, "Let me tell you, Xu Xianggong and the toad spirit have lost both sides! I just saw a White light, white light flashed past, Xu Xianggong fell, and Toad Jing also fell!"

Everyone in the shop said worriedly: "Oh! Bodhisattva bless you, and keep Xu Xiangping safe and sound."

"Xu Xianggong is so kind, he is here to save us! He must not have any accidents!"

The little beggar walked aside and muttered in a low voice, "Is it true? Am I the only one who thinks Xu Xianggong's acting is too fake? When he fell down, he had to find a clean place, as if he was going to sleep, and slowly lay down on the ground softly." Lay down, it doesn't look like it hurts at all!"

Xiaoqing turned her head to look at him, and the little beggar shrank his shoulders, "You...you bearded man, what are you doing looking at me?"

Xiaoqing said: "Little brother, I also think he fell very fake."

The little beggar held Xiaoqing's hand and shook it up and down, "My bosom friend!"

On the street, Xu Xian coughed weakly twice. He wiped the corners of his mouth, "You goblin...you are really powerful...but, I won't let you run away."

He took out a bottle from his pocket. This small bottle was just a very ordinary black pottery bottle. The body of the bottle was uneven, as if it was still stained with mud.

Xu Xian forced himself to sit up, opened the bottle, and said to the elf: "Fairy! Your days of harming people are coming to an end! Cough cough cough!"

A child cried and shouted: "Brother Xu, are you okay!"

Xu Xian forced a smile at him, "Brother Xu is fine, you should hide and don't come out. I'm afraid that Brother Xu will become disabled in the future. You have to be obedient and be a capable person, only then can you be worthy of Brother Xu."

Xu Xian pointed the mouth of the bottle at the toad essence, his eyes became firm, and the corners of his mouth were drawn into a straight line.

"Wang Daoling! I call you, do you dare to agree?"

Toad Jing was about to vomit blood, and was so angry.I don't know what was put in that bowl of water. Now he can't move his body, and he can't open his mouth. He can only let others slaughter him.

Xu Xian said: "Wang Daoling, let me ask you one more question, do you dare to agree to my call?"

Wang Daoling was so angry that he broke free, and said, "Why don't I dare?"

As soon as the words were finished, Wang Daoling swished into the bottle.

Xu Xian quickly capped the bottle, and the people hiding in the shop ran out one after another.

"Xu Xianggong, you are too powerful!"

"Yes! Mr. Xu, are you seriously injured?"

"Xu Xianggong, let's call the doctor for you!"

Xu Xian shouted loudly: "Go back quickly! I'm not very good at using this magic weapon, be careful of the goblin running out!!"

Everyone retreated again and again, all the way to the eaves of the shop.The bottle in Xu Xian's hand shook back and forth, and he held the bottle tightly with his eyes wide open. Finally, a flash of white light flashed, and Xu Xian fell to the ground covered in blood while holding the bottle.

Both Bai Suzhen and Xiaoqing were terrified. The two of them really did nothing but stop the demon. Xu Xian did it alone. Nothing really happened to him, right?

Running to Xu Xian's side, Bai Suzhen shouted anxiously: "Xu Xianggong, Xu Xianggong, are you okay!"

Xu Xian secretly opened his eyes a little, and he sent a voice transmission to Bai Suzhen, "Go home quickly, tell Erlang God that I'm faking, don't let him worry! This is the most important thing, do it quickly!"

Bai Suzhen nodded, she ran into the alley, used the method of escaping from the ground, and immediately returned home.

Xu Jiaorong was washing clothes, when she saw Bai Suzhen coming out of the ground in men's clothing, she was so frightened that she threw away the basin in her hand.

Bai Suzhen caught the pot, "Sister, two...where is Mr. Yang?"

Xu Jiaorong pointed to Xu Xian's bedroom without knowing why, "Mr. Yang stayed in the bedroom and didn't go out."

Bai Suzhen put down the basin and ran to Xu Xian's bedroom. Before knocking on the door, Erlang Shen opened the door, "What's the matter?"

"Xu Xianggong asked me to tell you in advance that he was not injured, but just pretending."

Erlang Shen nodded coldly, left the bedroom and closed the door, "Go to the front."

Arriving at the front, Erlang Shen said to Xu Jiaorong: "Xu Xian seems to be in a little trouble. He may come home covered in blood in a while. Sister, don't be afraid, he's just pretending."

Xu Jiaorong became anxious, "Have Chinese characters caused trouble? Is it because of Mr. Yang?"

Erlangshen smiled and shook his head, "It has nothing to do with Master Yang, and he didn't cause any trouble. After he comes back, sister can just pretend to cry. I'm here for everything, and Xu Xian can't suffer."

As soon as the words fell, a large group of people walked towards Xu Xian's house noisily.Xu Jiaorong opened the door, Xu Xian closed his eyes, lying on a simple stretcher covered in blood.

Aunt Wang said with red eyes, "Miss Xu, you...sorry...we just went to the hospital in front of us to ask, Mr. Xu may not be able to save him."

No need to pretend, Xu Jiaorong's tears flowed down all at once, "Chinese! Chinese! How did things turn out like this!"

Erlang God walked over and took the bottle from Xu Xian's hand, "This is a bottle for collecting demons. With Xu Xian's magic power, he still can't control this. What happened?"

The little beggar wiped his tears and said: "The fake Taoist priest who sells medicine at the street is a toad essence. In order to protect us, brother Xu put the toad essence into this bottle, but he himself was injured. Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ..."

Erlangshen frowned and said, "Put him down, I will cure him with a secret method."

The little beggar asked: "Are you a god? Will Brother Xu be all right?"

Erlang Shen shook his head, "I can only try, even if it's done, both he and I will be seriously injured, and we won't be able to use our power for a short time."

Stretching out his hand to carry Xu Xian away, Erlang Shen said, "I'll take him to heal his wounds, and everyone should not bother him."

Xu Jiaorong wiped away her tears, "Thank you neighbors for sending back the Chinese language, and please go back! I will come to the door to thank you some other day."

Aunt Wang said: "Jiaorong, we know you are feeling uncomfortable, just ask what the family needs. Mr. Xu saved all of our lives, as long as you open your mouth, we are willing to let us go through fire and water."

Xu Jiaorong saluted everyone, "Thank you everyone, if there is something, I will speak up."

After seeing off the neighbors, Xu Jiaorong angrily went to Xu Xian's room, opened the door and saw that Xu Xian had already changed into clean clothes.He sat obediently at the table, as if he was waiting for her sister.

"Okay! Xu Hanwen! You've got some skills, right! Are you going to scare my sister to death?"

Xu Xian immediately admitted his mistake, "Sister, I was wrong."

"I only admit my mistakes with my mouth, but I don't want to repent in my heart!"

Xu Xian blinked, "But I can't do nothing! That toad spirit gave people Gu worms. If everyone in Qiantang County took his medicine, everyone would be controlled by him."

Xu Jiaorong sighed, "Forget it! I can't say no to you. Mr. Yang, you teach him well, you always scare people like this, sooner or later I will be scared out of my mind by him!"

After Xu Jiaorong finished speaking, she went out angrily. Xu Xian looked at Erlang God pitifully, "Please, please, don't scold me."

Erlang raised his lips, "I'm not scolding you. It's just that you are a patient now. From today onwards, you can only eat breakfast, no lunch, dinner and snacks. When we eat, you have to sit at the table and watch us eat .”

Xu Xian covered his face, "Wow! You are so vicious! I will starve to death."

Erlang patted his head, "Aren't you good at bigu? Don't worry, even if you don't know bigu, you won't starve to death. After all, you have a lot of meat on your body, so you can bear hunger!"