[Comprehensive Mythology] I don't want to have sex with you

Hurrying to the outside of the examination room, there was a long line at the door, and the people in front of the line had already entered the room slowly.

Dong Yong tidied up his clothes and was at the end of the line. He stretched his neck and looked forward, suddenly felt that something was missing in his hand.

"Brother!" Dong Yong looked at Erlangshen and said in horror, "I... I forgot my pen and ink."

Erlang Shen handed him a basket with a cold face, "Here."

Dong Yong took the basket and hugged it tightly to his chest, "Brother! You are more caring than my own father."

Erlangshen remembered the way Dong Yong called him father last night when he was drunk, and couldn't help but turn dark. "Go in quickly! I'm going back to the inn first."

Dong Yong didn't know how he had provoked Erlangshen, a sensitive and fragile person, he shook his head and left Erlangshen behind, and concentrated on queuing up, waiting to enter the examination room.

After queuing for a long time, it was finally Dong Yong's turn. The soldiers checked Dong Yong's basket, searched him and let him in.

It was too late to come in, and the good position was gone. Dong Yong searched for several times, and the rest were 'shit numbers'.

The excrement number is the most annoying position during the exam. There is only one toilet in each row of number rooms.The toilet is generally placed in the innermost part, and the room next to the toilet is called the manure number.The dung number is facing the open-air public toilets, and the situation is as bad as can be imagined.

Dong Yong casually put the basket on the table of the No. [-] room. He had no choice but to resign himself to his fate. Whoever told him to come late, the good seats were taken away by others.Fortunately, he has learned a lot of spells from Erlang Shen. As long as he seals his sense of smell, he will not be able to smell feces and urine.

When the time came, the soldiers handed out the papers in large baskets.Dong Yong opened the paper and glanced at the questions roughly.This year's test questions are quite normal, not too biased nor too difficult.

Dong Yong polished his ink slowly, thinking about how to write essays.

I didn't eat anything in the morning, I ate greasy food yesterday, and I drank too much alcohol. Dong Yong's head hurts a little, and acid reflux in his stomach.

Rubbing his stomach, Dong Yong felt that the situation was not good, he hadn't been sick for a long time.He remembered that someone said that people who never get sick will be seriously ill as long as they get sick.

He quickly made a draft on the straw paper, and before he had time to revise it, Dong Yong ran out of the room and vomited.

A student sitting next to him covered his nose with disgust on his face. The exam had just started, and his position was not good. He planned to answer the paper quickly when no one was going to the toilet.Unexpectedly, there was a sick patient sitting next to him, and he vomited and vomited at the beginning, how could he answer the paper.

After Dong Yong vomited, he felt much better. He drew a talisman in mid-air to suppress the sour smell of the toilet.

Weakly holding on to the wall and returning to the number one room, Dong Yong beat his forehead vigorously.Looking at the words on the paper, he just felt dizzy.

Lying on the table for a while, Dong Yong felt that he might have worshiped a fake Emperor Wenchang yesterday.

Suppressing the discomfort, Dong Yong stopped drafting, and wrote the answers directly on the paper, hoping to finish the answer and go back sooner.

It may be that Dong Yong was in a hurry to leave. He felt that his thoughts were smooth today, and his writing was more beautiful than usual.

Suffering from headache and nausea, Dong Yong finally finished answering the questions.It was already afternoon at this time, and Dong Yong didn't eat the porridge and pickles brought by the examination room at noon.He tidied up the papers and things, and shouted at the soldiers in the cell: "Master, Lord!"

A soldier came over and asked, "What are you shouting for?"

"Master Jun, I'm about to die, I want to hand in the papers and leave early."

The soldiers saw that his eyes were blue and his lips were chapped, as if he was seriously ill.He thought for a while and said, "Generally, you are not allowed to leave early, but seeing how seriously ill you are, I'll report it to the proctor."

Dong Yong bowed his hand weakly to thank him, the soldiers called the examiner, Dong Yong heard someone coming, stood up unsteadily, and saluted the invigilator.

The invigilator saw that Dong Yong's face was indeed sickly, so he asked the candidates in the next room.

"Is it like this when he entered the examination room?"

The examinee stood up and said respectfully: "As for the adults, when he first came in, his face was fine, but he started to vomit after the papers were handed out. As for the others... the students can't see it."

The invigilator said to Dong Yong: "In this case...you put the paper on the table, pack up your things and leave first!"

Dong Yong thanked the invigilator and walked out with his small basket, shaking under his feet.

Seeing his crumbling appearance, the invigilator felt that he should not be able to walk back, so he sent someone to carry a stretcher and sent him out of the examination room.

Dong Yongqiang thanked him and lay down on the stretcher.The stretcher was shaking, and Dong Yong's mind was like a puddle of egg liquid, with a pair of chopsticks stirring in it, which made him have a splitting headache and dizziness.

After leaving the examination room, several soldiers put him down. They still had to maintain order in the examination room, so they couldn't send him home.

There are many carriages, horses and sedan chairs parked outside the examination room. Some are family members of examinees waiting here, some are in the business of carriages and horses, and some are from other places. These coachmen can take them back to the inn.

Dong Yong remembered that Erlang Shen said that he would go back to the inn first, so he looked left and right, trying to find a car to go back to the inn.

A coachman had seen him early on, saw that no one was coming to pick him up, and ran over enthusiastically to take the business.Dong Yong also saw the coachman, and just as he was about to wave, Erlang Shen suddenly appeared beside him.

"Dong Yong, what's wrong with you?"

Dong Yong waved his hand, "I'm fine, I'm just sick."

Erlang God helped him stand up, "Go, I'll take you back."

The coachman had already walked halfway, and when he saw that Dong Yong was being picked up, he had no choice but to go back disgruntled.

Erlang God supported Dong Yong, cast a spell and returned directly to the room of the Tongfu Inn.

Lying on the soft bed, Dong Yong finally felt a little more comfortable.

Erlang Shen poured a glass of water and threw a pill into it.

"Come on, drink this."

Erlang God wanted to help Dong Yong up and feed him water, but Dong Yong hurriedly stopped him, "I'll do it myself, my brain is like stirring eggs, and every time I move, my head hurts. The eggs in my brain Do it yourself, don't come to help."

He raised his head, took the teacup and drank the potion, Dong Yong lay back gently and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Brother Zhenjun, when I get better, take me to see Emperor Wenchang, I want to ask him why he did this to me!"

God Erlang covered him with a quilt, "Reflect on yourself! Yesterday you ate big fish and meat, and drank cold wine. I told you not to drink it, but you prefer to drink it! Can you rely on Emperor Wenchang?"

Dong Yong: "Can I not see my mistakes? But what I love most in this life is myself, how can I bear to blame myself?"

Erlangshen poked him on the head, shaking his head.

"You can't bear it, I can bear it."

Dong Yong covered his head and shrank into the quilt, "Hey! It hurts! The egg on my head!"

Erlangshen's heart softened, and he asked, "What did you have for lunch? I'll go buy you something to eat."

Dong Yong waved his hand, "I don't eat, I can't eat anything, and I didn't eat in the examination room at noon. I just came out after answering the papers casually. I can foresee that this time the exam will be like shit."

"Don't worry, my medicine will take effect soon, and you should be hungry in a while."

Just as Erlangshen was about to go out, Emperor Wenchang bumped into him.

As soon as he entered the door, Emperor Wenchang took God Erlang's hand and said apologetically, "Zhenjun, I'm sorry Dong Xiaoyou, I made a mistake!"

Erlang Shen pulled out his hand, hid it behind his back and shook it, "What's wrong?"

"I... I didn't sober up in the morning, and I was in a daze, so I didn't guarantee his success in the exam..."

Erlang Shen: "...I knew you were unreliable, and I shouldn't have gone to you yesterday."

Emperor Wenchang said embarrassedly: "I didn't do it on purpose..."

Lying on the bed, Dong Yong stretched out his hand towards Emperor Wenchang, and said weakly, "Dijun, can you come here for a while?"

Emperor Wenchang ran over and sat by his bed and said apologetically, "Dong Xiaoyou, I'm so sorry!"

Dong Yong smiled like a holy father, "It's okay, don't be afraid." He stared wide-eyed, grabbed Emperor Wenchang's collar and shook vigorously, his tone was horrifying, "I don't care! I really don't care at all! "

Emperor Wenchang's collar was wrinkled from being grabbed, and he said helplessly, "You... let go! Do you know what you are doing? You are hurting a god!"

Dong Yong let go of his collar, "What did you say? I hurt the gods?" He strangled Emperor Wenchang's neck and said viciously, "You hurt me first! I am not afraid of you! I am fearless!"

Erlang God asked Dong Yong to let go of Emperor Wenchang, "Okay, okay, stop making trouble when you are healthy."

Dong Yongsong released Emperor Wenchang and went down to the ground. He said to Erlangshen: "I don't want to be admitted to Jinshi or anything. Let's solve the problem of refugees and go home quickly! I don't want to stay in the capital anymore. I think my little flower... "

Emperor Wenchang asked: "Refugees? What refugees?"

Dong Yong told him about the refugees, "The emperor went crazy and put all the refugees in prison. He refused to take out the money in his private treasury to plow the seeds. Who do you think can force him? Erlang and I I also thought of ways, such as becoming the prime minister or some minister to speak out! I even want to become the favorite concubine of the harem and give him a pillow breeze! But after much deliberation, these methods are not very good."

Emperor Wenchang asked: "I think these methods are all right! Why do you think it's not good?"

"When the emperor became a prime minister and a concubine in the harem, when the emperor was not happy, he made up a few crimes at will, and their family was finished. Didn't this implicate them? Our original plan was to meet the emperor after I became a Jinshi. I will speak directly to the emperor."

Emperor Wenchang said disdainfully: "Manchu civil and military officials don't talk, but you are loyal to the emperor and patriotic, which shows that you are capable. Does the emperor listen to what you say? Do you have relatives? You are not afraid of angering the emperor. You ransacked your family and exterminated your family? Why do you bother yourself?"

Dong Yong said frankly: "As I said, I am a good young man who is patriotic and dedicated. Besides, I am an emperor. I am afraid of being a fool. It is not a day or two since we have been with Erlang God. I am just too lazy to be an emperor. I am afraid that my kidneys will suffer from kidney failure, otherwise the emperor would have been pulled down by me long ago."

Erlang Shen explained to Emperor Wenchang: "Don't listen to him talking nonsense. The refugees were arrested for only five days, but the matter seems to have been suppressed. Now the most concerned thing in the capital is Chunwei. In fact, the emperor doesn't care about the refugees at all. Life or death, I have sent land to take care of those refugees in the cell and keep them safe. We are just waiting for a normal way to meet the emperor, as for how to get the emperor to agree, we have our own way."

Emperor Wenchang approached them, "What can I do? Tell me too?"

Dong Yong hooked him and Erlangshen's necks with a smirk, "Let me tell you...we will do this first...then that...finally, you know?"

Emperor Wenchang pointed at him and said, "Dong Xiaoyou, you are very scheming!"

Dong Yong pretended to be modest and cupped his hands, "Thank you, thank you!"

Emperor Wenchang rubbed his hands, "Dong Xiaoyou! You can carry out the original plan! I really didn't bless you to pass the exam, but I bless you to win the first prize! When you win the first prize, are you afraid that you won't see the emperor?"

Erlangshen smiled murderously, "You didn't remember my request, but only Seventh Princess' request, did you?"

Emperor Wenchang shook his head quickly, and he smiled awkwardly: "No, no! I just admire Dong Xiaoyou, and I have a good relationship with you, so I want to give you the best!"

Dong Yong smiled at Dijun, "Dijun, thank you."

"Look, Dong Xiaoyou has realized my painstaking efforts, so I said, who among the scholars in the world would not be willing to be the number one scholar?"

Dong Yong jumped on top of him, grabbed his neck and shook him back and forth, "I understand! But why is it the No. Is it? I’m such a man! I’m such a man! It’s you! You ruined me!!!”