summer love

The school is a barracks made of iron, and the students are flowing soldiers.Every year, batches of students graduate in June, and batches of new students enter school in September.The same story is released every year, but different people have different twists and turns.My campus romance with brother Tao is just an episode, the man is gone, what about the living?

The next morning I woke up early and saw Brother Jie sleeping on the sofa in the living room. I knew he had been working hard to take care of me these two days, and he had to deal with business matters.Unexpectedly, he was a light sleeper, and he woke up as soon as I walked into the sofa.

He rubbed his eyes and said, "I got up late and haven't made you breakfast yet."

"How can I always trouble you, I will do it today. You are also very tired recently, so take a rest, it's still early."

I went to the kitchen to make breakfast, he didn't sleep, and went to another bathroom to wash up.

The two of us sat quietly at the dining table and had breakfast. Brother Jie spoke first: "Are you okay?"

"I'm very good."

"I will take good care of you in the future, not because of his TOEFL, but because of me..."

I interrupted him before he finished speaking, "Brother Jie, I know what you mean, but I'm not in the mood to think about other things right now. My heart is all about him."

"I understand your heart. After so many years, how could you just let it go."

"I want to go back to my old school, go back home, and come back in a few days."

Brother Jie said, "Shall I go with you?"

I said, "No need, Brother Jie, you still have work to do, and it has troubled you recently."

Brother Jie said with a face of embarrassment: "But, yourself..."

"It's okay, I'm such an old man. It's okay to go back to the place I was familiar with before. I'm used to living alone in the past few years. I will contact you when I come back."

In the end, Brother Jie still insisted on sending me to the train. I couldn't show him too much face.

From the city where I live now to the city where I used to go to school, it takes about three or four hours by ordinary train, and it takes nearly two hours by high-speed rail.Although the journey is not long, but the heart is very heavy.It is not the first time that such a heavy heart has been felt.

I have gone through life and death twice in my life, so I can survive, but the two partings are different.Once was the death of the grandmother, which was a parting of family affection, which can be said to be a farewell to the first half of life; this time is the death of a lover, which is a parting of love, in another sense it is a change to the second half of life .Those who have not experienced such a heavy heart cannot understand it.

The description of Qingming in Bai Juyi's "Cold Food Wild Hope" is very suitable for my state of mind at this time: crows and magpies make noise in the trees, and whoever cries for cold food in Qingming.The wind blows the wilderness and the paper money flies, and the ancient tombs are piled up with green grass.Tangli flowers reflect poplar trees, full of places where life and death part.Mingming heavy springs cry but do not hear, Xiao Xiao Mu Yu people go back.

Although it has been a long time since my grandmother passed away, I remember it clearly.My roommate told me that it was because I had no direction.

It was a Monday when I was living at school, and I got up to have breakfast in the morning, and suddenly my mother called me and asked if I could come back when I had time.I said that there will be an exam this weekend, which is an entrance exam for my application for further study, and it is very important to me.

I asked my mother, "Did something happen at home?"

My mother said: "It's okay, it's just that your grandma is in the hospital. Let's see if you can come back if you have time."

I said: "I have an exam on the weekend, can I go back after I finish the exam. I can live at home for a while."

My mother said: "Okay, take the exam well."

I didn't think much about it either.My grandmother was not in good health, and during that time the old man suffered from high blood pressure and other senile diseases. My brother also kept persuading me that it was fine, and I will send you home after the exam.

As a result, I had just bought lunch at noon and hadn't eaten yet. My sister called me and told me that my grandma was dying, and told me to go back quickly. At that moment, my heart collapsed.I was bewildered and at a loss, and the first thing I did was call my brother.

It so happened that he was near the school.I hurried back to the dormitory to give the meal in my hand to the uncle in charge of the building, packed up two pieces of clothes, and ran outside.I met classmates on the road who greeted me and ignored them. While running, I bought the nearest train ticket and prepared to go home.

When I came out, he had already arrived at the gate of our school.It was only later that I realized that there was such a coincidence. I hadn’t gone home to sleep for several days, and he came to spy on me again to see if I hooked up with the handsome guy at school.Brother Tao has really fallen into the vinegar vat.

On the way, I kept persuading him, hurry up, hurry up, and I was about to cry.He comforted me and said, "It's okay, it's okay. It's normal for the elderly to get sick, and maybe they've survived now."

I wasn't in the mood, so I could only force a smile: "Well, maybe it's all right."

He went on to say: "That year my grandma was the same. The doctors said she was going to die. Afterwards, she tried her best to rescue her, and finally survived. Grandma will definitely survive."

I said, "Well, it will definitely work."

I was brought up by my grandmother. When I was young, my family was poor, and my parents worked hard every day to make a living. My sister and I were brought up by my grandmother.Especially me, I have lived with my grandma since I was a child, and there are not enough rooms at home.My parents share a room, my sister shares a room, and I can only sleep with my grandparents.When I was still a commuter, the one who got up and cooked for me every morning was my grandma, and there were very few others.So my relationship with grandma is very good.It's just that I go to school outside now, go home less and less often, and don't live with my grandparents anymore, so I see less and less often.

After we arrived at the station, we checked that the ticket could be advanced a bit earlier, and Brother Tao rebooked the ticket for me.But he was worried about me and wanted to go back with me.

He said: "Don't worry, I will only send you near the hospital, and no one will see me."

I don't know what to say at this time, I also want him to accompany me and say: "Okay."

He held my hand tightly all the way and never let go.I know that he will be my reliance in the next life, and I will also be his reliance.We have to walk through this life hand in hand and through life after life.

On the way, I received a call from my eldest brother-in-law asking me to go back to my hometown directly. They are already on the way.I know grandma has gone, I didn't have time to see her for the last time.

Brother Tao heard my call and hugged him without saying anything. I wept unscrupulously in his arms.He just hugged me like that and didn't move.I cried for a long time before I came out of his arms.

I cried and said, "Brother, no one came to pick me up. What should I do?"

He said: "Use the taxi app, call a car"

But my hands didn't listen to me and kept shaking.It was the software he downloaded and the address he entered for me.This is the first time for me to use a car-hailing software. When I was in school, my brother Tao picked me up. When I go home, I can have a car or ride a bicycle at home.Then he talked to the master on the phone, where to pick us up and when to arrive, he helped me arrange it.

He said: "No way, I can only send you home, how can you make me feel at ease like this."

I didn't say no, and I don't want to.Just like that, I cried in his arms along the way, and my second sister kept calling me to tell me not to worry, they had already arrived home.

I said: "It's all my fault, I didn't come back sooner, and I didn't see you for the last time."

The second sister said: "No one will complain. It is the destiny. Everyone must die. No one can do anything about it."

Along the way, my brother was also persuading me that you can’t be resurrected after death, so it’s not bad for you. Grandma’s spirit in heaven also hopes that you will prepare well for the exam.

Speaking of which, Brother Tao and my grandma met once.It should be when I was a sophomore. Brother Tao said that he wanted to visit the scenic spots in our county. There is a beautiful cave in our county.I called a high school classmate of mine and asked him if he had a ticket. I had been there many times and I didn’t want to go, but for Brother Tao’s happiness, I still had to find a ticket for him and go with him.It was already noon after reading it that day, and this guy insisted on eating hot pot.

I said angrily: "How can anyone eat hot pot in summer, and I'm not familiar with the county town."

He didn't say anything, just acted like a baby to me.I had no choice but to call the classmate who helped me find the ticket and said: "Please eat, let's eat hot pot, make it hot with heat." His wish was satisfied.After dinner, he said to me: "Your classmate is very kind, very down-to-earth, and worthy of making friends." I said proudly: "That is, birds of a feather flock together, and people are divided into groups. What a good person I am, I am not like you I made a group of fox friends and dog friends."

He didn't say anything, just made a face at me.

On a whim, I said: "Go and see my grandparents, I haven't seen them for a long time."

He said, "OK."

When we arrived, my grandparents had just woken up from a nap.In summer, the days are long, and the two elderly people sat in the courtyard to enjoy the cool air. They told them that the air conditioner was installed and the wind was not cool, and we couldn't help it.

They were very enthusiastic about Brother Tao, and I introduced him, "This is my classmate."

Grandpa also teased me and said: "This kid is so energetic. He is tall and good-looking. He is not short like you. He looks really ugly compared to my grandson."

Grandma said: "There is nothing at home to entertain you. Go to the backyard to pull peanuts and cook peanuts for you to eat." I like freshly cooked peanuts the most, so we went to pull and wash peanuts together.In a blink of an eye, they were all gone, and I was the only one left.

I said to my brother: "I'm a bastard. I never thought that my grandma would die suddenly. She asked me before when I could see my granddaughter-in-law. I told her that my great-grandson can see her. If I can't, I will tell her." You burn pictures. Am I an asshole?"

After finishing speaking, I hit myself, my brother stopped me: "No, it's not that our feathers are not bastards, our feathers are very filial. We will take wedding photos in a few days and burn them to grandma."

When we got home, my second sister was waiting for me at the door.The second sister asked me: "Is the money enough for the driver?"

I said, "I still have money." Then I subconsciously looked at the car that had already driven out.

"He came back with you?"

"He is worried that I will come back alone."

"Okay, let's go back quickly, there are still many things to be busy at home."

The second sister was pregnant at that time, so she was not allowed to go to the funeral and stayed with grandpa at home.

The second sister told me that they have all returned to the village.My family lives outside the village, so I drove to the village in a hurry, almost crushing a chicken to death on the way.

When I got home, I saw grandma lying there peacefully, her body was still warm.I haven't cried all the time, I don't know why I haven't cried since I got home.The corner of grandma's mouth was still bloody, and later my dad told me: "The doctor said that if you can survive for three days, you will be fine, and that day is the last day. Grandma has always been in a good state of mind. When I was feeding at noon, grandma coughed and died. Spit, I went to get a tissue to catch it. I didn’t come up in one breath, and spit out a mouthful of blood, but I couldn’t be rescued.”

Later, I went back to school from home, and my brother came to the station to pick me up and go back to school with me.He took me to the photo studio and took the wedding photo that hung above our bed.There is also a photo of me in my wedding dress, but I won't let him show it.The two of us also came back specially to burn photos for grandma once, satisfying grandma's wish is also to make up for my fault.I believe grandma will accept us.

That was the first time I felt that the way home and leaving home was so heavy, that was the first time I felt that I didn't want to leave home, and I wanted to stay at home.

But after my brother passed away, I didn't even want to find a home to be in a daze.Our home is only my own, so how can it be a home?Now I also understand grandpa's hesitation after grandma left.Everything has to be experienced in order to know the pain inside.

I attended grandma's funeral, but I didn't know about my brother's funeral. I could only know that he went through someone else's report.We haven't seen each other for several years, and unexpectedly, there will be a sudden separation between heaven and man, and I still think that one day he will come to me.I don't even have a portrait of him, and I can't dispose of his belongings as his other half, but he still left our home, the one that can't be replaced as a home.

Fortunately, I found a photo of us before at our home. I want to go with him to the place where we fell in love and have a look, and recall our youthful years.